Man Arrested for Masterbating in KMart Changing Room (1 Viewer)

[mr roboto]

http://kimt.com/2016/04/01/man-arrested-after-alleged-indecent-conduct-in-rochester-kmart/

ROCHESTER, Minn. – A 32-year-old man was arrested Thursday after officers found him masturbating on a Kmart dressing room floor.

Employees told police he came to the store both Wednesday and Thursday and spent a very long time in the fitting rooms. One employee reported seeing him lying naked on the floor on Wednesday.

Taylor Gehrking had been in the fitting room for a half hour on Thursday before police were called. After officers found him, his probation officer was notified and Gehrking was issued an apprehension order.

The recommended charge in this incident is a gross misdemeanor for indecent conduct.

Gehrking was arrested last month when a jogger found him masturbating on the snow-covered bike path near Bear Creek Park. He told police the alleged incidents didn’t happen and he was just “polar bearing out.”  Authorities say he’s known in the area for similar behavior.

 

[Baloney Sandwich]

Polar bearing out is a solid defense

 

[Skipdog77]

Gehrking the gherkin 

 

[3C's]

half hour? Did he have to wait for the little blue pill to start working?

 

[shadyridr]

What a jerk off

 

[Nigel Tufnel]

Wait that's illegal?

 

[dozer]

Thanks Pastey.

 

[IvanKaramazov]

You expect this sort of thing at Wal Mart, but I hold KMart to higher standards.

 

[Rove!]

"Gross misdemeanor"

 

 

[belljr]

Now that's a blue light special 

 

[eoMMan]

Wait that's illegal?

 

[Jobber]

Anybody hear from Andy this morning?

 

[JuniorNB]

I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom. 

 

[McGarnicle]

I've done that at Old Navy but I had the decency to sit on the bench. The girl who unlocked the door had a great rack, and I was taking my pants off anyway...

 

[AnonymousBob]

I didn't know people still went to Kmart. Or that Kmart was still a thing. We sure this isn't some guerilla marketing on their part? 

 

[Ignoramus]

Wait that's illegal?

Thanks a lot, bin Laden. 

 

[mr roboto]

I didn't know people still went to Kmart. Or that Kmart was still a thing. We sure this isn't some guerilla marketing on their part? 

In some areas up here Kmart and Shopko are still things. 

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

I believe it is past time for government to address the need for public masturbation spaces.  Closets or small rooms for this function need to be as ubiquitous as rest rooms.

 

[BeaverCleaver]

I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom. 

That King mascot turns you on?

 

[NajehHejan]

Looks like a normal enough guy.  I guess you just never know.

Ha ha! Normal if you live in Bizarro World!

 

[The General]

Sometimes you just have unchamber a few rounds. 

 

[SacramentoBob]

That King mascot turns you on?

Power is sexy.

 

[BeaverCleaver]

Power is sexy.

Then Junior should be busy in the bathroom at Trump Tower.

 

[Galileo]

I've done that at Old Navy but I had the decency to sit on the bench. The girl who unlocked the door had a great rack, and I was taking my pants off anyway...

How did you clean up?

 

[McGarnicle]

How did you clean up?

 

 

[tonydead]

Have you seen the amount of yoga pants in Walmart recently?  Hard to blame him. 

 

[tri-man 47]

http://kimt.com/2016/04/01/man-arrested-after-alleged-indecent-conduct-in-rochester-kmart/

ROCHESTER, Minn. – A 32-year-old man was arrested Thursday after officers found him masturbating on a Kmart dressing room floor.

This is why I shop on-line.

 

[JuniorNB]

Then Junior should be busy in the bathroom at Trump Tower.

Pssst. The Burger King line was a song lyric. Although I should have just let you go on embarrassing yourself. Lol You seem pretty comfortable doing that. Oh, and you have some Trump sauce on your lip.

 

[AnonymousBob]

Stop being Trump into this. This thread is a safe place for public masturbation. 

 

[parasaurolophus]

Now that's a blue light ball special 

 

[TheAristocrat]

I didn't know K-Mart had dressing rooms.  The last time I was in a K-Mart was somewhere in the mid '90s.

 

[TheAristocrat]

In his defense, the women of Rochester are hideous.  Self-satisfaction is a far better plan than dating in that town. 

 

[RBM]

I guess laying on the dirty KMart floor was the least of his problems. 

 

[sho nuff]

Kmart sucks

 

[AnonymousBob]

Kmart sucks

Apparently not. Hence his being on the floor DIH. 

 

[[scooter]]

T-U-R not T-E-R

 

[Ignoramus]

This new board is neat in that it doesn't quote your text when I quote you, but somehow manages to know I'm quoting you.

Was going to say that it's pretty much the opposite of a blue ball special (unless he didn't get to finish -- I did not actually read the article).

 

[Insein]

Oh I'm sorry, I thought this was America!

 

[pollardsvision]

Wait that's illegal?

I'm gonna have to plead ignorance on this because if I had known this sort of thing was frowned upon....

 

[parasaurolophus]

This new board is neat in that it doesn't quote your text when I quote you, but somehow manages to know I'm quoting you.

Was going to say that it's pretty much the opposite of a blue ball special (unless he didn't get to finish -- I did not actually read the article).

Think they caught him in act and it was going on for half an hour. 

 

[NorvilleBarnes]

T-U-R not T-E-R

Maybe he's just really good at it and has moved on from his apprenticeship.

 

[shadyridr]

T-U-R not T-E-R

Yeah but this guy is a master at it

 

[St. Louis Bob]

You would be surprised at all the different places I've masturbated.  Then again, maybe you wouldn't.