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I asked my wife last night if she thought he would ever really appreciate the support system we put in place for his family and all the sacrifices everyone has made. She said no, but then said "Probably when we're gone. Did you really appreciate everything your mother did for you before she died?" It was kind of a gut punch because she was right. I didn't understand how much my mother meant to me and what she had done throughout my life until she was gone. Same with my wife's grandparents who were quite possibility the greatest people I have ever met in my life. Everyone loved them and appreciated them, but once they were gone, you realized even more what they were and what was now missing. It's ok.. We don't do what we do for appreciation. That's what we have dogs for. Those suckers show appreciation for everything! Kids on the other hand... Not so much.
I think I posted this in another thread awhile back. We attended our sons boot camp graduation a couple of years ago. After 13 weeks of letters and one very short phone call, graduating Marines are given an afternoon of liberty the day before graduation ceremony. Roughly three hundred newly minted Marines stand in formation with families and friends surrounding them on all sides. When the liberty call finally comes, everyone is near their emotional breaking point. Everyone scrambles to find their loved ones and give them a long needed hug. As my wife hugged our son, I looked around at the other families enjoying the moment. But, I also saw a lot of young kids that didn't have anyone there to share in the moment. It was heartbreaking to see. And it happens every week. I wondered if it was money, or time, or lack of family that was the cause.
Yes to all those issues not enough money, lack of time off from work, family issues or something else. When I graduated boot camp I was lucky enough to have my Mom and Dad and my battle buddy didn't have any family coming to see him graduate so my parents signed him out for the weekend. I didn't ask him why his family didn't show up because it seemed to be a sensitive issue already.
It is tough for some of the families I'm sure. Had this been 20 years ago, in our financial state then we would not have been able to do as much as we have. Traveling to Georgia to see him graduate basic was no issue. There were a number of young men there as well that didn't have any family to share with. Prior to him shipping off we paid for their hotel room for 4 days because money is tighter for them than us. We are not FBG rich by any means, but we don't want for much anymore. When my wife said she wanted to adopt the entire platoon I was all in. I'd rather give back to some of these guys than spend it on more crap that we end up buying for the grandkids. They are already spoiled enough.
All of those. Often these guys (gender neutral term here) enlist to get out of crappy situations.
I know you didn't post this for this purpose, but I bet there is more than a few people around here that would chip in to help with shipping costs and whatnot. I know I would much rather donate to someone like your family that is sending real impactful things to the troops rather than donating to some big box charity where bunches of the money won't go to the people that need it.Almost another month has gone by and being Veteran's Day and all, felt like an appropriate time to update. Have been in touch with my son through whatsapp. He's a bit disappointed because everything they were going over to do changed when we pulled out of Syria. Seems like it through the entire area into a bit of restructuring. He was supposed to be knee deep in the field but has spent most of his time on base. Which is perfectly fine with the rest of us! I hope he stays bored for the rest of his deployment. My wife and daughter-in-law have been very active in the Family Readiness Group. They adopted his entire platoon for sending over these camo Christmas stockings full of stuff. There are 30 of them I think in that platoon. Their actions ended up organizing some of the other families to adopt the other 2 platoons. So now the entire unit or whatever will be getting these stockings at Christmas. It's not cheap sending all that over there so my wife and daughter-in-law reached out on FB for donations. It has been very cool to see the support. One of his wrestling coaches donated a nice sum of money to help with shipping and supplies (it costs $400 to send one platoon these stockings in shipping alone). Other parents from the wrestling team when we were there reached out. This entire thing has been tough on my wife as that is her baby boy. When he was born it was just her and him that first year before I met them. They will always have this incredible bond. She will always be the only person he has been able to count on since day one of his life. She's had a couple nights where the tears have opened up to me but for the most part she has jumped into supporting the FRG and being a pillar of strength for my daughter-in-law. A couple weeks ago my daughter-in-law called her at 1:30 am on a work night in tears because the youngest wouldn't stop crying. "I'll be right there" was all she said before she threw on some clothes and spent the next hour and a half with them getting our grand-daughter to go to sleep.
The best result of this entire thing is getting to be so involved in our grand-kids lives. They are over every day. My grandson is 2 and is a hot mess as most 2 year olds are. Yesterday we outside getting the yards ready for the coming winter storm and he was checking out the shed in his back yard. His momma told him "You don't want to go in there, it is gross." He paused at the door looked back at her and said "Grandma poop in there?" I couldn't stop laughing. A month or so ago I had something back up in my basement bathroom tub. He was checking it out with me and I told him "Don't touch that. It's gross! I think grandma pooped in the tub!". Apparently he still remembers that conversation.
Happy Veteran's Day to all that serve and have served. It's an amazing sacrifice you all gave and we can't thank you enough. Without you guys, we wouldn't have the lives we live today.
Sorry, I missed this post before. We are good for the Christmas care packages. I think we are going to do something similar for Easter if you want to help out then. I'm sure I'll keep this post updated.
It get's even worse when you belong to some of the facebook groups. Especially the Moms. I still belong to the group for each phase our son has gone through. MCRD SD, MCT SD, FT Lee, Camp Lejeune, and a Marine Dad's group. The Dad's group is definitely the most relaxed of the bunch. But, the Mom's in the other groups stress about everything. Maybe us Dad's just process things differently, and probably hold most of it in.
I know exactly what you mean. The moms do stress out more in the groups. But that's ok. That's what Moms are supposed to do. They are much better (usually) at vocalizing what's happening inside. We do tend to hold it in.
I feel like it is worse now with the technology we have to keep in touch. While it is awesome that you can communicate easily, it tends to spoil the family members back home. When my son in law was deployed to Afghanistan a few years ago, there was much less contact. My daughter knew he was in danger but could only communicate with him on a very limited basis. So not hearing from him for a long time was normal... And there was no more reason to worry than any other day... With my son, he has been able to text and video chat with his wife and kids almost every day. So when he goes silent, she gets all whacked out. I think it would be easier if she didn't hear from him very often honestly....
What areas is your family in, in America? Any assistance, reach out... if anyone is able to do so.
They also had some talk of extending their deployment stateside if things got real bad with COVID. To help with supplies and what not. Hopefully we won't get to that point. That was worse case type scenario talk. 
HEY! I did that. I would rather be safe than sorry, lol. Good to hear everyone is getting by over there. Gotta be weird for them."Take all our savings out of the bank and put it in the safe!" Luckily for him (and the grandkids) his wife is very intelligent and wasn't falling for that nonsense.
