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My son just got served and now it's on (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter dutch
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Rick James
Footballguy
Both kids will get suspended so you may as we'll tell him to throw the first punch.
Just got back from dinner with the lad. I let him lead the discussion and came away impressed with his outlook and self awareness. Apparently the other kid isn't some school tough looking for an easy mark, rather a regular kid who didn't take kindly to my son's smartassiness. Both guys were mouthing off to one another when other dude threw down the guantlet.
When I asked my son what he wanted to do about the situation my son said he was going to handle it himself and asked me not to tell his mom about anything tonight. I asked about different possibilities and he pretty much said that going to the principal is out as is skipping recess. His friend suggested that he and my son do recess inside tomorrow and my son said that that would only cause the other boy to tell everyone he chickened out, so he's going to show. He did say there may be a possibility to defuse the situation because the other kid isn't really a bad kid so he'll try that first. Otherwise, it's going down.
I passed along the advice about getting in a quick jab or two to the nose and to use his left to protect himself. I also told him to quit it quick the minute an adult steps in and to be mindful when sent to the office. My son is nervous about hurting the other kid, getting hurt himself and getting in trouble with school. I told him that it's likely that at least two out of three are going to happen so he should just be prepared.
When I asked my son what he wanted to do about the situation my son said he was going to handle it himself and asked me not to tell his mom about anything tonight. I asked about different possibilities and he pretty much said that going to the principal is out as is skipping recess. His friend suggested that he and my son do recess inside tomorrow and my son said that that would only cause the other boy to tell everyone he chickened out, so he's going to show. He did say there may be a possibility to defuse the situation because the other kid isn't really a bad kid so he'll try that first. Otherwise, it's going down.
I passed along the advice about getting in a quick jab or two to the nose and to use his left to protect himself. I also told him to quit it quick the minute an adult steps in and to be mindful when sent to the office. My son is nervous about hurting the other kid, getting hurt himself and getting in trouble with school. I told him that it's likely that at least two out of three are going to happen so he should just be prepared.
I am concerned about something that's been brought up in this thread and that's the current stance on fighting in schools these days as it relates punishment handed out. Is it possible for more than a two or three day suspension if this is a quick one-two and it's over kind of fight with no or minimal injury?
T Bell
Footballguy
Ilov80s
Footballguy
Zero tolerance. A fight is 5 days out, regardless of who started the fight, length of fight, extent of injuries, etc.
I hear you, Quez, but my son isn't breaking anyone's nose, I'd be shocked if he landed even one blow to tell you thruth.
I'm sure they do but I've never had to be concerned about them before so I never read them. I'm looking them up as we speak.
shadyridr
Footballguy
hit first
Ilov80s
Footballguy
I'm sure that varies, but look it up for your school. I think it is at times ridiculous, but trends are definitely to come down hard on any school violence.
comfortably numb
Footballguy
Call the school in a teenage voice and ask what the punishment would be.....tell em your asking for a friend
T J
Footballguy
Sounds like your son actually has a bit of respect for the kid or he would have trash talked him when describing him to you. Seems like the first course of action is for your boy to ask him if he really wants to fight. Maybe they both agree it's not worth it and that's it. Also sounds to me like you want there to be a fight because you don't don't seem to be doing anything at all to diffuse it.
I negotiate for a living and have always managed to talk my way out of situations. Fighting seems so totally pointless.
Having said that, if a fight does happen, I like the nose/gut combo.
I negotiate for a living and have always managed to talk my way out of situations. Fighting seems so totally pointless.
Having said that, if a fight does happen, I like the nose/gut combo.
Zow
Footballguy
Zow
Footballguy
Joe Summer
Footballguy
I think she was seriously intimidated by the other kid's mom. Like, if my mom didn't agree to the fight, then the other kid's mom was liable to start a fight with my mom.Also, I don't think my mom had ever really seen a real fight before, so she probably didn't know what to expect. But after a couple punches she got a really horrified look on her face. She might have tried to stop the fight but I think she was in shock.
Man, it's been 30 years and I still remember it like it was yesterday. I remember when we first started fighting, I was filled with absolute hate for that kid and his entire family. But with each punch, I felt less hate and more sympathy. I felt sorry for the kid I was beating up, not because he was being beat up but because he must have had such a crappy life. We lived in a lower-middle-class neighborhood and that family lived in the dingiest, dirtiest, most run-down single-story ranch house in the entire development. I stopped feeling sorry about my own home life after that fight. I know that kid got a whipping when he went home that day.
About 5 years later, his mom died of a drug overdose. When I heard the news, I just shrugged my shoulders. I guess I felt sorry for her 6 kids but honestly I think the world was probably better off without her in it.
Zow
Footballguy
Yep. In my only fight ever in 8th grade I just went back to my wrestling days from K-5 and simply ducked a punch, took the kid down, hooked an arm bar and drove my chin into his spin. Killed squealed. Fight over.
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Chris Makepeace is a regular poster here. Let's get his take.
If that's your idea of working. Then it is. I personally think these fights are part of the growing experience and shouldn't be punished near as harshly.
Harry Manback
Footballguy
This should be interesting
Hawks64
Footballguy
It's all over the map where I live but if it's a premeditated/arranged fight I wouldn't be shocked to see the kids get expelled or a lengthy suspension handed down. Not worth it IMO.
Zow
Footballguy
He could be detained and charged.
Not to that that will or should happen, but I imagine there's a some criminal statute in your state which would permit it.
Courtjester
The Town Drunk
I understand what you think can happen, but what Quez is talking about happens with juveniles. I know the way things used to be, but this is now.
Fighting gets him suspended-bottom line.
In Colorado, you break a nose, cause a more major laceration or the kid falls to the ground and breaks an arm or his jaw, it is 2nd Degree Assault which is a class four felony. Over 10 makes him eligible for a detention sentence. So you could have huge lawyer bills. Not to mention a record that doesn't just get sealed when he turns 18--you have to work to get those types of convictions expunged. Further, as his parent, you are liable for restitution for the injuries and we are not just talking co-pays here. I see restitution orders in the 10s of thousands with monies owed to insurance companies for hospital/ER stays.
I understand you want your son to be tough, but he needs to tread lightly. One punch can bankrupt you and ruin at least his teenage life.
The days of being tough and dumb are over. We live in a world that someone will sue you or file a criminal complaint against him at the drop of a hat. Now I am not advocating him not defending himself, but he needs to be careful.
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Find a boxing gym and have your kid invite the other to box. They can invite all their friends to watch. Both parents should also show. They'll still get to fight, and it won't result in any expulsion or lawsuit.
While I think the advice of "hit first" and "go for the nose" will result in good results for your kid. When taken in the context of this fight (planned fight, coached by Dad who knew of the fight), your kid could easily end up expelled. I don't know your kid, but when Mom and the Principal put pressure on him to talk about the fight, he might let it slip that you knew and coached him up. If that happens, the cops may come calling for you.
While I think the advice of "hit first" and "go for the nose" will result in good results for your kid. When taken in the context of this fight (planned fight, coached by Dad who knew of the fight), your kid could easily end up expelled. I don't know your kid, but when Mom and the Principal put pressure on him to talk about the fight, he might let it slip that you knew and coached him up. If that happens, the cops may come calling for you.
massraider
Footballguy
Thought it was happening after school? If they wander off the grounds before the battle, suspension shouldn't be a problem.
6th grade is a great time for this. No one is gonna get seriously injured.
6th grade is a great time for this. No one is gonna get seriously injured.
Good lordy, now we're talking jail time and major restitution issues. My son is set on trying to squash this thing before it gets started by appealing to the other kids sensible nature and I've been encouraging of using this tact. If it does come to pass that the other kid pushes the issue then I expect my son will hold his own for the seconds it takes for a teacher to intervene and I do not expect either kid to be seriously injured.
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
Tack.
T Bell
Footballguy
I'm fairly certain that, for instances like this, what is deemed to have happened "in school" is not confined to the school property or school hours. I seem to recall reading some news stories about kids getting suspended/expelled for off-campus behavior outside of school hours.
massraider
Footballguy
Copy that. I have no children, no experience in this, and should probably not offer advice here.
T Bell
Footballguy
Have your son go to the fight and let everyone in the Lord of the Flies style circle crowd in to see the fight, and just as it's about ready to kick off, have him grab a handful of the flour in his pocket, throw it into the air, and scream, "It's ricin, #####es! I'm taking you all with me!!!"
Mr. Pickles
Footballguy
T Bell
Footballguy
Mister Martie
Footballguy
Whoa, guys. I think Woz may be a lawyer!
johnnycakes
Footballguy
We're talking the kid's whole future here. Getting sent to a juvenile detention center... Crappy education and probably no high school diploma. He can forget about college. And can probably forget about the Air Force for sure; probably the Army and navy as well. Maybe he'll learn a trade while he's in detention/jail. And I've heard rapes are common in those detention centers, so if he isn't a tough guy, he's going to come out all screwed up in the head and likely unable to keep any sort of a real job. So he's looking at a life on public assistance in one form or another. As for you and the rest of the family... You're going to be sued into bankruptcy. Have you declared a homestead on the house you own? If not, make that a priority first thing in the morning. I'd be late for work to get this do e if I were you.
Without a home to live in and after being sued into bankruptcy, you and the family will be looking for a trailer you can rent on a monthly basis while you go work at whatever you can find while your wife stands at a busy intersection with a big cardboard sign that says, "I have a family. Need food", or something along those lines.
That's the potential outcome if your kid fights. On the other hand, if he doesn't fight, he will be emasculated and will for the rest of his life be looking for opportunities to prove to himself that he is not a coward.
So, the way I see it, the kid is screwed either way. But if he doesn't fight, you get to keep your home, your job, and your wife.
Mr. Ected
Footballguy
T Bell
Footballguy
The Duff Man
Footballguy
Thank god I have two daughters and only have to worry about NFL players...
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