I didn’t say it around the child.
I said it in front of the child’s mother; and only found out later through a mutual friend that 1. She had a child who had Down Syndrome, and 2. That what I’d said as a casual insult to a friend had offended her.
My solution is to change myself. Because that’s all that’s really in my power to change. I can have conversations with others about language & the things that offend others great and small, but at the end of the day I’m only in charge of one person. Me.
So yes - it is self-focused. I will never again use a term that I know to be offensive. I know it is not only from that expedience, but from subsequently listening to the points of view of those who are offended by that specific language.
Just like I’m willing to listen to what
@Ministry of Pain has to say on this subject. Now, the term “owner” might not be as universally reviled, but MoP also isn’t the only one to have expressed a desire to see change in how people describe their relationship with FF “assets” (for a still-problematic lack of a better term)
What I was addressing with my post was more to the generalization/sentiment of “you people get offended by everything and that’s why fun is dead!”. I’m not saying you made this generalization, I’m just describing what I see from a certain “anti-PC” faction of society.
there are degrees of offense taken just like there are degrees of offenses committed. All are worthy of discussion. Some discussion might influence others. Some discussion might simply reinforce what one already believes.
For sure I can’t make you or anyone see this as i do, just as I can’t force anyone to change. People have to want to change. That involves sometimes dropping the casual [insert problematic offensiveness here] that we grew up with or were culturally desensitized to.
So as a now 50 year old, I don’t leap to “man, you people are offended by everything!” and instead try to be more like “what might I be doing that's offensive?” I’m not perfect - I’m sure I offend people. I’m a very direct person. I swear like a truck driver & have a biting sense of humor - #### happens.
But that doesn’t mean I can’t try to be better. And part of the way I do that is by considering the sensitivities of others. I won’t always agree that it’s worth changing for (“owners” for example) but that doesn’t mean I won’t consider it, and I certainly won’t dismiss it as “just one more thing cancel culture is coming for”.
Interesting subject for sure. I’m grateful to MoP for starting it, even if it has evolved a bit from the OP.