Wooing my neighbor: I came. I hugged. I wooed. Now moving on. (2 Viewers)

[Zegras11]

I'm going with a NetFlix original.  Wait... does Cinemax do original movies?

NetHugtm

 

[cstu]

I kinda think she's Jewish given the Hebrew and all.

The Idiot's Guide to Wooing Jewish Women.

 

[Tom Skerritt]

Oh. The neck tattoo is her kids' names.

The forearm one is a bible verse, in Hebrew. She said her faith is very important to her, which I respect.

 Not so important that she won't play grab-### with you while legally married to another man.

 

[Chemical X]

The synopsis of the 90-minute conversation: 

We talked and laughed about random stuff, talked about how ridiculous it was that we had to essentially sneak outside to hug each other, and laughed some more about it. Then I, in no uncertain terms, gave her a list of things I admired about her and let her know that I was interested in her and getting to know her even more. She reciprocated that wish, and we both agreed it was an odd situation with us being neighbors and no matter what, we didn't want it to become awkward, so taking things slow was probably the best course of action. 

So, cards are on the table. We are both aware of each other's interest. Still proceeding with cautious optimism. 

35 likes?  let's be real guys, an instamom, with 2 kids, tatted up and still married is gonna be interested in any half normal goon with a paycheck that shows an inkling of interest in her and the rent a kids.

 

[Chemical X]

The Idiot's Guide to Wooing Jewish Women.

wait a sec....if she's a Jew broad I may have be able to offer advise, though my wife has shiksappeal.

 

[ragincajun]

Wait!  Are we talking side neck or back of neck?  Side neck proceed with caution.  Back neck whatevs.

My advice that may ruin things for you, but if you feel like going all Geronimo....

She initiated the hey I need a hug can I come over shtick.  I think you text her one night after everyone's asleep and tell her you would like to come kiss her goodnight.  Tell her it just popped in your head as a spontaneous thing, so it does not seem like you have been overthinking / planning it.

NRJ: Hey are you awake?

Gal: Hey stud, sure am......?

NRJ:  I think I am going to walk over and kiss you goodnight.

Gal:  finally

You have to be careful not to slow play this thing.  2 things can happen.  First she gets another guy.  Second you are placed into the friend zone.

With all of that said I am about the dumbest guy with this stuff.

 

[Tom Hagen]

35 likes?  let's be real guys, an instamom, with 2 kids, tatted up and still married is gonna be interested in any half normal goon with a paycheck that shows an inkling of interest in her and the rent a kids.

Sure, but he's our goon and we are supporting his wooing.

 

[Nathan R. Jessep]

 Not so important that she won't play grab-### with you while legally married to another man.

Not sure what the eye roll is for, TS. That part is a technicality, due to the mandatory one-year waiting period. It's Louisiana law. I would know, as I had to do it myself. 

 

[cstu]

35 likes?  let's be real guys, an instamom, with 2 kids, tatted up and still married is gonna be interested in any half normal goon with a paycheck that shows an inkling of interest in her and the rent a kids.

This is why I don't get the 'take it slow' crowd.  If he makes a move and she goes for it, win.  If she turns him down, win.

 

[pollardsvision]

Goooooooooooood morning, huggers!!

I believe you mean motherhuggers!

 

[Ned]

Happy for you, NRJ. Hope it all works out. 

 

[(HULK)]

Good update.  I'm updating your chances in our pool.  The reason myself and many others wanted you to kiss her already is because it would address the elephant in the room, but your cards on the table also addressed it.  The lady knows you're on the hunt now, and she's cool with it.  Fine to take it slow now.  Eagerly awaiting the hands holding update next week.

 

[northern exposure]

Oh, and for the OutfitGuys...

She asked me yesterday when I was going running again. I said I wasn't sure and asked why. She said because she didn't mind watching me run by her house. Let the outfit record reflect that I usually run in a tank top, gym shorts AND an at least partially matching baseball cap. SUCK IT, #####ES!!!

I figured this is your "go to" look:

https://goo.gl/images/WkgCuL

 

[Mr. Nasty]

Oh, and for the OutfitGuys...

She asked me yesterday when I was going running again. I said I wasn't sure and asked why. She said because she didn't mind watching me run by her house. Let the outfit record reflect that I usually run in a tank top, gym shorts AND an at least partially matching baseball cap. SUCK IT, #####ES!!!

Love this. Keep up the good work Jessep! We're all rooting for you.

 

[DocHolliday]

Ok. I caught up from yesterday afternoon. This thread is a lot of work but I can't stop.

This woman wants our hero bad. 

 

[SWC]

brohan i am also glad that your hug did not last 90 minutes trust me man i know a thing or two about huggin and you get five maybe six minutes in and you start sweating by 90 minutes youd be a sweat ball and so would she man it would be disgusting i mean body oder crap like that ugh no one wants that so hey man good job on keepin it short and avoiding the sweat zone take that to the bank brohan 

 

[chet]

The Idiot's Guide to Wooing Jewish Women.

Come on.  This can't be real.

Manliness

Now be careful here, the first stop sets the tone for the entire night. Apparently some people see Jewish men as nebbish and overly sensitive, which makes me cry. Fight that stereotype and take her to just that: a fight. It shows that you’re a man who knows what’s going on in the streets. You don’t actually have to brawl, just make knowledgeable offhand comments like “that guy has serious fists” and “these days the real fight is in the economy.”

Generosity

With your masculinity secured, it’s time to take her out to a nice meal and really get to know her. Here you want to show her that you’re a capable Jewish provider, so upon sitting down, immediately announce your intentions to not only buy dinner but also the table and chairs where you’re sitting. Then, give your lady a smirk with one eyebrow raised. Women aren’t sure if that means you’re being coy or trying to get something out of your teeth, but either way, jackpot.

 

[CurlyNight]

Not sure what the eye roll is for, TS. That part is a technicality, due to the mandatory one-year waiting period. It's Louisiana law. I would know, as I had to do it myself. 

1 year??!! I thought CA held the trump card with 6 months! 

 

[AAABatteries]

90 pages??

 

[Zegras11]

1 year??!! I thought CA held the trump card with 6 months! 

Idaho is 20 days if neither side is contesting anything. 

 

[Brony]

90 pages??

The list of things the Colonel admires about saucy neighbor could be it's own spinoff thread of 30+ pages 

 

[(HULK)]

Over/under for # of pages in this thread when NJR posts about kissing Marissa for the first time: 126

 

[CurlyNight]

Idaho is 20 days if neither side is contesting anything. 

Wow! I wonder how each state comes up with the different grace times?

 

[bueno]

The synopsis of the 90-minute conversation: 

We talked and laughed about random stuff, talked about how ridiculous it was that we had to essentially sneak outside to hug each other, and laughed some more about it. Then I, in no uncertain terms, gave her a list of things I admired about her and let her know that I was interested in her and getting to know her even more. She reciprocated that wish, and we both agreed it was an odd situation with us being neighbors and no matter what, we didn't want it to become awkward, so taking things slow was probably the best course of action. 

So, cards are on the table. We are both aware of each other's interest. Still proceeding with cautious optimism. 

Ypu are playing your cards well. Go with your intuition.

 

[boilerdave]

Over/under for # of pages in this thread when NJR posts about kidding Marissa for the first time: 126

Is "kidding" a typo, a euphemism or literally kidding her about something? :shuked:

 

[msommer]

Not sure what the eye roll is for, TS. That part is a technicality, due to the mandatory one-year waiting period. It's Louisiana law. I would know, as I had to do it myself. 

That's ####ed up. In Denmark if you have a non contested divorce it takes two to three weeks and is done online.

 

[Nathan R. Jessep]

1 year??!! I thought CA held the trump card with 6 months! 

ONE. LONG. MISERABLE. YEAR. Unless one of the parties admits (or is found guilty of) infidelity; At least that's the way I understand it. 

 

[Buckfast 1]

Oh. The neck tattoo is her kids' names.

The forearm one is a bible verse, in Hebrew. She said her faith is very important to her, which I respect.

Thanks for ruining my tattoo boner.  Nothing less sexy than kids and the Bible. 

 

[msommer]

This ain't ####### Denmark, Frenchie.

(I'm crying for you, really, I am)

 

[CurlyNight]

Bible verse tatoo? Lives in Louisiana? If she is into Jimmy Swaggart, don't walk, run!

 

[James Daulton]

ONE. LONG. MISERABLE. YEAR. Unless one of the parties admits (or is found guilty of) infidelity; At least that's the way I understand it. 

But that doesn't preclude you from dating other people does it?

 

[Nathan R. Jessep]

But that doesn't preclude you from dating other people does it?

it does not

 

[cstu]

it does not

Then why would it be miserable?  Seems glorious is more apt.

 

[Nathan R. Jessep]

Then why would it be miserable?  Seems glorious is more apt.

Well, it's like a dark cloud looming overhead. Then once you get the official decree, the skies are clear and birds are singing, and there's a parade. And beer. 

 

[Eligoesdeep]

Bible verse tatoo? Lives in Louisiana? If she is into Jimmy Swaggart, don't walk, run!

hateful post.

 

[CurlyNight]

hateful post.

I don't hate them. They're just manipulative money grubbing people using fear and insecurites topped off with a dose of brainwashing.

 

[cstu]

Well, it's like a dark cloud looming overhead. Then once you get the official decree, the skies are clear and birds are singing, and there's a parade. And beer. 

If that's the case I'm going to have dreams of dark clouds tonight and my #### in a new (to me) ######.

 

[The Hank]

Well, it's like a dark cloud looming overhead. Then once you get the official decree, the skies are clear and birds are singing, and there's a parade. And beer. 

And hugs... Don't you EVER forget the hugs

 

[renesauz]

ONE. LONG. MISERABLE. YEAR. Unless one of the parties admits (or is found guilty of) infidelity; At least that's the way I understand it. 

I thought 6-12 months was the norm everywhere if kids were involved?

 

[Eligoesdeep]

I don't hate them. They're just manipulative money grubbing people using fear and insecurites topped off with a dose of brainwashing.

It is 2016.

 

[cstu]

I don't hate them. They're just manipulative money grubbing people using fear and insecurites topped off with a dose of brainwashing.

Well, ok, you earned back some CSTU points.

 

[CurlyNight]

Well, ok, you earned back some CSTU points.

Oh thank God!

 

[CurlyNight]

It is 2016.

They way they see it, it's 1816..

 

[Eligoesdeep]

They way they see it, it's 1816..

Please stop, it is 2016 and you're being a bigot.

 

[Nathan R. Jessep]

I thought 6-12 months was the norm everywhere if kids were involved?

Custody agreements are completely separate. At least they are here. I don't think it has any bearing on the divorce itself. The divorce is more a product of our community property laws. 

 

[cstu]

Next update.

 

[msommer]

I'm confused about the Hebrew. Shouldn't it be in Aramaic, The Official Language of the Bible TM?

 

[renesauz]

Custody agreements are completely separate. At least they are here. I don't think it has any bearing on the divorce itself. The divorce is more a product of our community property laws. 

There are many states where the minimum separation time is significantly longer if the marriage produced children. IN Virginia, it's one year with kids, and six months without

 

[jvdesigns2002]

Well done NRJ!!   The direction of our tale seems to be heading in a very good and positive direction.   Keep up the good work!!

 

[Arid Filch]

Well done NRJ!!   The direction of our tale seems to be heading in a very good and positive direction.   Keep up the good work!!

If he maintains the pace, his thread will be longer than Ron's by the end of September.  You're doing a great job, NRJ.  Seems like you are letting her initiate while still being playful and spontaneous yourself.  I think that will ease any awkwardness that could result from being neighbors. Whatever you are doing is working so keep it up.  I don't care where this lady works, lives, or even want pictures*, but don't yadda yadda over any of the important details.  Like if somebody ends up going down on the porch, definitely critique their technique.

*I had an older friend who told lots of stories about past and present romances. Everything in his stories was described in such large proportions.  "Oh yea, the pool have like 50 girls, and the cocaine, it is this high on the table.  That girl I with she have these big #######.  I mean, real big #######. And she got a real big #####."  Is that even a good thing, I wondered.  I kinda wondered about the veracity until he took me around and I saw some of the ladies in question. Then I could honestly nod and say yea sounds about right.  Pictures would only derail this thread, I like the picture you are painting.