Jump to content
Fantasy Football - Footballguys Forums

Jorts: Reloaded


BGP

Recommended Posts

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

Mullet up, or down? Just curious.

As for me, I just crocheted some socks for my son, put together a nice flower arrangement for the wife for when she gets home from a long day at the spa, and had sex with men.

Congrats on the table and... ahem... caulk.

Neither, military style
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands

Yea, picnic tables, with all that complex joinery and exotic species of hardwoods.

It's a picnic table. Settle down. My 11 year old cousin can use a chop saw and screw boards together. Oh, and my cousin is a girl.

See thats where your wrong, us jort wearing men use air nailers. The one I've got would knock your 11 year old neice on her ###.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands

Yea, picnic tables, with all that complex joinery and exotic species of hardwoods.

It's a picnic table. Settle down. My 11 year old cousin can use a chop saw and screw boards together. Oh, and my cousin is a girl.

See thats where your wrong, us jort wearing men use air nailers. The one I've got would knock your 11 year old neice on her ###.
Good luck when your picnic table falls apart in 2 years.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands

Yea, picnic tables, with all that complex joinery and exotic species of hardwoods.

It's a picnic table. Settle down. My 11 year old cousin can use a chop saw and screw boards together. Oh, and my cousin is a girl.

See thats where your wrong, us jort wearing men use air nailers. The one I've got would knock your 11 year old neice on her ###.
Good luck when your picnic table falls apart in 2 years.
Wrong my friend apparently your not the carpenter type. Ring shank nails will provide you with all the holding power you need. The only thing taking this table out is a wrecking ball.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

So I spent the day out and about the city- warm and sunny... Lots of shorts of different types, but I saw only three pairs of jorts all day. Two on 7ish yo white boys, and one on a borderline obese hispanic... guy? Coulda been a very butch woman. Whoever it was, they didn't have their caulk gun handy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mrs. Osaurus and I were doing some shopping at JC Penny today for some sheets and I happen to come across a rather disturbing set of tables with a cornucopia of jorts. While I did not see anyone wearing said jorts, I was horrified none the less. Check out these pics at your own risk.

:goodposting:

Jorts 1

Jorts 2

Jorts 3

Jorts 4

Jorts 5

I especially like the white jorts and the last pair that come with a free belt. Very stylish.

:football:

Edited by Osaurus
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands

Yea, picnic tables, with all that complex joinery and exotic species of hardwoods.

It's a picnic table. Settle down. My 11 year old cousin can use a chop saw and screw boards together. Oh, and my cousin is a girl.

But he caulked some trim!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands

Yea, picnic tables, with all that complex joinery and exotic species of hardwoods.

It's a picnic table. Settle down. My 11 year old cousin can use a chop saw and screw boards together. Oh, and my cousin is a girl.

See thats where your wrong, us jort wearing men use air nailers. The one I've got would knock your 11 year old neice on her ###.
:confused: Nails.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

Were they cut-offs or did you actually buy them that way?
with torn holes where the back pockets were....
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Im sure this has been covered, but forgive me for not reading through the 7 pages but....

If you can't wear Jorts, you can't wear cargo shorts, athletic shorts seem to also be frowned upon, what exactly are you guys wearing?

My guess is thta they are wearing the cargo type that goes below their knee with the little tassels on the side. Friggin sissies

http://www.liquidationmerchandise.com/newm...argoshorts2.jpg

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mrs. Osaurus and I were doing some shopping at JC Penny today for some sheets and I happen to come across a rather disturbing set of tables with a cornucopia of jorts. While I did not see anyone wearing said jorts, I was horrified none the less. Check out these pics at your own risk.

:(

Jorts 1

Jorts 2

Jorts 3

Jorts 4

Jorts 5

I especially like the white jorts and the last pair that come with a free belt. Very stylish.

:thumbdown:

nothing wrong with some of those, I dont wear them but they are still a popular style
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mrs. Osaurus and I were doing some shopping at JC Penny today for some sheets and I happen to come across a rather disturbing set of tables with a cornucopia of jorts. While I did not see anyone wearing said jorts, I was horrified none the less. Check out these pics at your own risk.

:(

Jorts 1

Jorts 2

Jorts 3

Jorts 4

Jorts 5

I especially like the white jorts and the last pair that come with a free belt. Very stylish.

:thumbdown:

nothing wrong with some of those, I dont wear them but they are still a popular style
There is plenty wrong with all of those.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mrs. Osaurus and I were doing some shopping at JC Penny today for some sheets and I happen to come across a rather disturbing set of tables with a cornucopia of jorts. While I did not see anyone wearing said jorts, I was horrified none the less. Check out these pics at your own risk.

:hot:

Jorts 1

Jorts 2

Jorts 3

Jorts 4

Jorts 5

I especially like the white jorts and the last pair that come with a free belt. Very stylish.

:yucky:

Great work! :goodposting:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mrs. Osaurus and I were doing some shopping at JC Penny today for some sheets and I happen to come across a rather disturbing set of tables with a cornucopia of jorts. While I did not see anyone wearing said jorts, I was horrified none the less. Check out these pics at your own risk.

:ptts:

Jorts 1

Jorts 2

Jorts 3

Jorts 4

Jorts 5

I especially like the white jorts and the last pair that come with a free belt. Very stylish.

:X

Great work! :thumbdown:
Those jorts are more commonly worn by african-americans and hispanics, from what I've seen.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mrs. Osaurus and I were doing some shopping at JC Penny today for some sheets and I happen to come across a rather disturbing set of tables with a cornucopia of jorts. While I did not see anyone wearing said jorts, I was horrified none the less. Check out these pics at your own risk.

:ptts:

Jorts 1

Jorts 2

Jorts 3

Jorts 4

Jorts 5

I especially like the white jorts and the last pair that come with a free belt. Very stylish.

:X

Great work! :thumbdown:
Those jorts are more commonly worn by african-americans and hispanics, from what I've seen.
They're still terrible.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

Were they cut-offs or did you actually buy them that way?
Bought em, carpenter short version.
:confused: @ carpenter jorts
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mrs. Osaurus and I were doing some shopping at JC Penny today for some sheets and I happen to come across a rather disturbing set of tables with a cornucopia of jorts. While I did not see anyone wearing said jorts, I was horrified none the less. Check out these pics at your own risk.

:unsure:

Jorts 1

Jorts 2

Jorts 3

Jorts 4

Jorts 5

I especially like the white jorts and the last pair that come with a free belt. Very stylish.

:yucky:

What is that symbol on 4? It's like a key or something... The only thing worse than wearing jorts, is if the jorts have a big medieval key patch sewed on them.

And what is with the canvas belts? Does anyone wear those? With or without jorts? :popcorn:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If you can't wear Jorts, you can't wear cargo shorts, athletic shorts seem to also be frowned upon, what exactly are you guys wearing?

More often than not it's best to just avoid shorts...do a lightweight pant instead. The extra 16" on your shins won't kill you.If need to wear shorts.....Khaki cargo shorts with streamlined side pockets (not big, bulging baggy pockets), mid-knee length are acceptable.Switch up the colors for variety...dark tan, light tan and grey.Not much to choose from really, but it is what it is. Summer sucks for guy attire. Edited by offdee
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If you can't wear Jorts, you can't wear cargo shorts, athletic shorts seem to also be frowned upon, what exactly are you guys wearing?

More often than not it's best to just avoid shorts...do a lightweight pant instead. The extra 16" on your shins won't kill you.If need to wear shorts.....Khaki cargo shorts with streamlined side pockets (not big, bulging baggy pockets), mid-knee length are acceptable.Switch up the colors for variety...dark tan, light tan and grey.Not much to choose from really, but it is what it is. Summer sucks for guy attire.
Thank you Calvin Klein
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If you can't wear Jorts, you can't wear cargo shorts, athletic shorts seem to also be frowned upon, what exactly are you guys wearing?

More often than not it's best to just avoid shorts...do a lightweight pant instead. The extra 16" on your shins won't kill you.If need to wear shorts.....Khaki cargo shorts with streamlined side pockets (not big, bulging baggy pockets), mid-knee length are acceptable.Switch up the colors for variety...dark tan, light tan and grey.Not much to choose from really, but it is what it is. Summer sucks for guy attire.
Thank you Calvin Klein
Calvin Klein hasn't been hip in 10 years.You have lots of catching up to do.Start with tossing the carpenter jorts in the trash.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If you can't wear Jorts, you can't wear cargo shorts, athletic shorts seem to also be frowned upon, what exactly are you guys wearing?

More often than not it's best to just avoid shorts...do a lightweight pant instead. The extra 16" on your shins won't kill you.

If need to wear shorts.....Khaki cargo shorts with streamlined side pockets (not big, bulging baggy pockets), mid-knee length are acceptable.

Switch up the colors for variety...dark tan, light tan and grey.

Not much to choose from really, but it is what it is. Summer sucks for guy attire.

:tinfoilhat:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

You cannot be serious. If people are older (married, etc.) then they can pretty much wear whatever they want in my eyes. But if you go to the gym and work out in jorts, khaki shorts, or pretty much anything besides athletic shorts, then you are beyond help.

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

Edited by Voltaire
Link to comment
Share on other sites

If you can't wear Jorts, you can't wear cargo shorts, athletic shorts seem to also be frowned upon, what exactly are you guys wearing?

More often than not it's best to just avoid shorts...do a lightweight pant instead. The extra 16" on your shins won't kill you.

If need to wear shorts.....Khaki cargo shorts with streamlined side pockets (not big, bulging baggy pockets), mid-knee length are acceptable.

Switch up the colors for variety...dark tan, light tan and grey.

Not much to choose from really, but it is what it is. Summer sucks for guy attire.

:mellow: I wear shorts all year round.

Khaki/tan cargos and the tee de jour or polo shirt is my standard casual wear.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

If you can't wear Jorts, you can't wear cargo shorts, athletic shorts seem to also be frowned upon, what exactly are you guys wearing?

More often than not it's best to just avoid shorts...do a lightweight pant instead. The extra 16" on your shins won't kill you.

If need to wear shorts.....Khaki cargo shorts with streamlined side pockets (not big, bulging baggy pockets), mid-knee length are acceptable.

Switch up the colors for variety...dark tan, light tan and grey.

Not much to choose from really, but it is what it is. Summer sucks for guy attire.

:shrug:
:confused:

unreal :lmao:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

You cannot be serious. If people are older (married, etc.) then they can pretty much wear whatever they want in my eyes. But if you go to the gym and work out in jorts, khaki shorts, or pretty much anything besides athletic shorts, then you are beyond help.

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

I usually wear athletic shorts to the gym. In this case the gym was closing early for memorial day and I stopped in on the way home from the lumber yard. Why am I explaining this to you all? I'm 45 years old and I can do whaterver the #### I want.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

You cannot be serious. If people are older (married, etc.) then they can pretty much wear whatever they want in my eyes. But if you go to the gym and work out in jorts, khaki shorts, or pretty much anything besides athletic shorts, then you are beyond help.

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

I usually wear athletic shorts to the gym. In this case the gym was closing early for memorial day and I stopped in on the way home from the lumber yard. Why am I explaining this to you all? I'm 45 years old and I can do whaterver the #### I want.
Can we get a pic of these jorts? Seriously.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

You cannot be serious. If people are older (married, etc.) then they can pretty much wear whatever they want in my eyes. But if you go to the gym and work out in jorts, khaki shorts, or pretty much anything besides athletic shorts, then you are beyond help.

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

I usually wear athletic shorts to the gym. In this case the gym was closing early for memorial day and I stopped in on the way home from the lumber yard. Why am I explaining this to you all? I'm 45 years old and I can do whaterver the #### I want.
Can we get a pic of these jorts? Seriously.
Here ya go..

http://web.ivenue.com/bellsalesco/images/Dcs13.jpg

Edited by Two Deep
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

You cannot be serious. If people are older (married, etc.) then they can pretty much wear whatever they want in my eyes. But if you go to the gym and work out in jorts, khaki shorts, or pretty much anything besides athletic shorts, then you are beyond help.

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

I usually wear athletic shorts to the gym. In this case the gym was closing early for memorial day and I stopped in on the way home from the lumber yard. Why am I explaining this to you all? I'm 45 years old and I can do whaterver the #### I want.
Can we get a pic of these jorts? Seriously.
Here ya go..

http://web.ivenue.com/bellsalesco/images/Dcs13.jpg

"Oof."
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

You cannot be serious. If people are older (married, etc.) then they can pretty much wear whatever they want in my eyes. But if you go to the gym and work out in jorts, khaki shorts, or pretty much anything besides athletic shorts, then you are beyond help.

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

I usually wear athletic shorts to the gym. In this case the gym was closing early for memorial day and I stopped in on the way home from the lumber yard. Why am I explaining this to you all? I'm 45 years old and I can do whaterver the #### I want.
Can we get a pic of these jorts? Seriously.
Here ya go..

http://web.ivenue.com/bellsalesco/images/Dcs13.jpg

"Oof."
Seconded.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Im sure this has been covered, but forgive me for not reading through the 7 pages but....If you can't wear Jorts, you can't wear cargo shorts, athletic shorts seem to also be frowned upon, what exactly are you guys wearing?

100% polyester coaches shorts.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

You cannot be serious. If people are older (married, etc.) then they can pretty much wear whatever they want in my eyes. But if you go to the gym and work out in jorts, khaki shorts, or pretty much anything besides athletic shorts, then you are beyond help.

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

I usually wear athletic shorts to the gym. In this case the gym was closing early for memorial day and I stopped in on the way home from the lumber yard. Why am I explaining this to you all? I'm 45 years old and I can do whaterver the #### I want.
Can we get a pic of these jorts? Seriously.
Here ya go..

http://web.ivenue.com/bellsalesco/images/Dcs13.jpg

To the gym??? :shrug: Really? :hey::lmao:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not to throw this thread into a tailspin but I was at the beach this past weekend and saw 3 guys wearing bananahammocks. :rolleyes: Needless to say I threw up in my mouth a little bit. :X

People really do wear these? :yawn: ight need to find a new beach :unsure:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

X
:blackdot:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Not to throw this thread into a tailspin but I was at the beach this past weekend and saw 3 guys wearing bananahammocks. :blackdot: Needless to say I threw up in my mouth a little bit. :X

People really do wear these? :lmao: ight need to find a new beach :lmao:
From what I could tell, they were foreigners and were together. Didn't understand what language they spoke either.Try explaining why those "hairy men are wearing no clothes" to a 4 yo. My daughter was extremely creeped out. And we won't be going back to that beach.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

X
:goodposting:
I don't make the trends, but college aged people have already jumped on it. 20 and 30 somethings will be soon to follow.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

X
:goodposting:
I don't make the trends, but college aged people have already jumped on it. 20 and 30 somethings will be soon to follow.
Unfortunately, he's not lying. These are all the rage on the insanely preppy SMU campus.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Just built a picnic table from scratch with my bare hands caulked some trim boards so the wife could paint and went to the gym to work out all while wearing a pair of what you people call jorts. What have you manly non jort wearers done this memorial day?

You cannot be serious. If people are older (married, etc.) then they can pretty much wear whatever they want in my eyes. But if you go to the gym and work out in jorts, khaki shorts, or pretty much anything besides athletic shorts, then you are beyond help.

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

I usually wear athletic shorts to the gym. In this case the gym was closing early for memorial day and I stopped in on the way home from the lumber yard. Why am I explaining this to you all? I'm 45 years old and I can do whaterver the #### I want.
Can we get a pic of these jorts? Seriously.
Here ya go..

http://web.ivenue.com/bellsalesco/images/Dcs13.jpg

Holy. Crap.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

X
:goodposting:
I don't make the trends, but college aged people have already jumped on it. 20 and 30 somethings will be soon to follow.
I'm college aged and live in a college town, everyone is still wearing cargo khakis unless they are gay or over 40
Link to comment
Share on other sites

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

X
:goodposting:
I don't make the trends, but college aged people have already jumped on it. 20 and 30 somethings will be soon to follow.
Unfortunately, he's not lying. These are all the rage on the insanely preppy SMU campus.
I'm keeping my eye on this look.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Are you guys kidding me? The only men I know that wear jean shorts are gay. I don't mean derogatory gay, I mean, the "gee, I like to kiss men" gay.

If you wear jorts and you're a guy, you probably have a stud on your tongue too.

And you might even have your tongue pierced.

Now, jean shorts on women? Very nice. :goodposting:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

And as for what's "in." Khaki shorts without cargo pockets that hit right at the knee (think the kind that your dad or grandad might wear on the golf course they look decent with Sperry's) are either already in or coming back depending on where you live.

X
:excited:
I don't make the trends, but college aged people have already jumped on it. 20 and 30 somethings will be soon to follow.
Unfortunately, he's not lying. These are all the rage on the insanely preppy SMU campus.
I'm keeping my eye on this look.
I definitely should have mentioned it's mainly for the preppy crowd right now.

It will soon get to everybody (I'm sure it has out West and in bigger cities), but for now it's usually the Sperry and Ralph Lauren Polo wearing crowd.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Restore formatting

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    No registered users viewing this page.

×
  • Create New...