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General Malaise

By General Malaise,
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Homer J Simpson

HELLO FROM REHAB!!!!   Not sure if anything's been shared but Sunday dinner at my parents' a couple weeks ago was in fact an elaborate ruse to stage an intervention.  Actually it wasn't very

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Getzlaf15

Getzlaf15 11,154

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On 3/17/2018 at 3:47 PM, Getzlaf15 said:

So we've now spent a MONTH deciding on the color of new hardwood flooring. (While not having a master bathroom to use)

The rep has been to our place twice with samples. Four times we have been to their showroom and brought home samples. Nothing matches our cherry cabinets. 

It's total insanity.  On the fourth and last visit to the showroom Thursday, we had half of the showroom floor strewn with samples and she brought in our kitchen cutting board because the end of the piece matches our cabinets.   And she still couldn't decide.   To be fair, we had decided FOUR times before and she changed her mind.

So I just gave up.  I found a nice, comfortable chair and plopped myself down and asked them if they had any alcohol. They gave me a beer. Then they said they needed a beer also and joined me.  We all threatened to make her take shots until she decided.  Ten minutes later, I signed the contract.

She just changed her mind again.  :hot::wall::wall::wall::wall::wall::banned::kicksrock:

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Getzlaf15

Getzlaf15 11,154

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Just now, Reg Lllama of Brixton said:

Nobody will ever notice that the floor and cabinets are a shade different...besides her.

I told her that after the first time she changed her mind.

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El Floppo

El Floppo 29,005

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34 minutes ago, kevzilla said:

I liked this post, but then I was torn. So I guess I'm just like Flop.

:burninginhell:

Now you're getting it. 

 

 

 

Not a euphemism.

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Mr.Pack

Mr.Pack 2,617

Posted
Posted (edited)
On 3/18/2018 at 11:33 AM, GroveDiesel said:

No. They've been doing it for awhile. It's why I always leave a giant printout of 2G1C for their prying eyes.

 

On 3/18/2018 at 11:33 AM, Wild Young Billy said:

That’s not new, it happens a good bit. 

 

On 3/18/2018 at 0:41 PM, Binky The Doormat said:

uh, about 2001. 

 

On 3/18/2018 at 9:04 PM, shuke said:

Been happening for a long time.

 

21 hours ago, tommyboy said:

happens all the time.    welcome to america post 9-11

I guess we don't travel very often. :bag: 

Thanks fellas

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Osaurus

Osaurus 9,193

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17 minutes ago, Aerial Assault said:

Wow, congrats to you folks on 1800 pages.  And you lost more than that (way more?) in the board downgrade, right? 

WE DID IT!!!!!

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GroveDiesel

GroveDiesel 9,323

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17 minutes ago, Aerial Assault said:

I'll be back when you guys hit 5,000 again.  So, see you on Easter Sunday. 

Joke's on you. Everyone in this thread will be in church on Easter Sunday, just like every Sunday.

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General Malaise

General Malaise 27,539

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Was thinking about this the other day....my mom's a very religious lady, moved up here, quickly became a church elder.  When she would have speaking parts or whatever, we'd dress the kids up and go and we'd go on Xmas Eve when she asked.  There might have been an Easter or Mother's Day tossed in there since 2006 when she arrived in Portland.  Now that she's confined to full time care, I wonder if I'll ever go to a church service again in my lifetime.  

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Epic Problem

Epic Problem 2,778

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2 minutes ago, General Malaise said:

Was thinking about this the other day....my mom's a very religious lady, moved up here, quickly became a church elder.  When she would have speaking parts or whatever, we'd dress the kids up and go and we'd go on Xmas Eve when she asked.  There might have been an Easter or Mother's Day tossed in there since 2006 when she arrived in Portland.  Now that she's confined to full time care, I wonder if I'll ever go to a church service again in my lifetime.  

don't you baptize an offspring every 10 months or so? 

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General Malaise

General Malaise 27,539

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Because I doubt all of you will check out the "Dead Fox in a Freezer" thread, I present to you this post from Top Dog:

 

Quote

 

I have an older brother who is a hillbilly.  Not sure how that happened as the rest of us were pretty normal and we grew up in a pretty urban area.  Anyway, he used to "trap".  Had properties outside the city where he would set up traps to catch raccoons, muskrats, whatever the hell he could then skin and sell the pelts. Had a whole setup in the garage where he could stretch the pelts or whatever.  There were times where he'd throw a possum, fox, whatever in the freezer to process or whatever later.  I remember my mother being PISSED at him one time because he put a possum in the freezer that apparently wasn't dead.  When she opened the freezer it had clawed it's way out of the bag it was in and was frozen solid hanging there, or sitting on the shelf, or whatever looking at her. 

He's also the only person I know who has been sprayed by a skunk (multiple times) and once put his truck in a ditch because he hit a raccoon or something driving, stopped to get it and for whatever reason threw it up in the cab with him.  It was only stunned and woke up.  He had to beat it with an axe handle he kept next to his seat (for killing roadkill) and managed to go off the road in the brawl with whatever it was. 

We think he was adopted.

 

:lmao:

 

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Osaurus

Osaurus 9,193

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4 hours ago, General Malaise said:

Was thinking about this the other day....my mom's a very religious lady, moved up here, quickly became a church elder.  When she would have speaking parts or whatever, we'd dress the kids up and go and we'd go on Xmas Eve when she asked.  There might have been an Easter or Mother's Day tossed in there since 2006 when she arrived in Portland.  Now that she's confined to full time care, I wonder if I'll ever go to a church service again in my lifetime.  

Just tell her you go.  

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RC94

RC94 2,081

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We haven't heard from Chuck Norris in a while.  If Chuck Norris was so awesome he could come to my apartment as I type this and slam my face into my keyboariwt7m9hiuepg09gjvorep\cqr3fetku

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