Encyclopedia Brown Posted May 26 Share Posted May 26 I worked 3rd shift for awhile so when I got out on the road it was usually empty. I would quote Elaine about the wide lanes...so luxurious. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Cowboysfan8 Posted May 26 Share Posted May 26 “You’re an anti dentite !!” ”Dentists ....who needs em...” “Yeah, not to mention the Blacks and the Jews” Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
brun Posted May 26 Share Posted May 26 It's Goretex! Gotta support the team. A nickle! 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayrok Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 The Kramer “I sense great vulnerability. A man-child crying out for love. An innocent orphan in the post-modern world.” “I see a parasite. A sexually depraved miscreant who is seeking only to gratify his basest and most immediate urges.” "Rowdy and unattractive, yet I detect a nobility of attitude and unwavering loyalty... much like the St. Bernard." "But note the eyes... he's a creature barely hanging on to existence. Like a cockroach clinging to sewer grate." "His struggle is man's struggle. He lifts my spirit." “He is a loathsome, offensive brute. Yet I can’t look away.” “He transcends time and space.” “He sickens me.” “I love it.” “Me too.” 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wikkidpissah Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 3 hours ago, Jayrok said: The Kramer “I sense great vulnerability. A man-child crying out for love. An innocent orphan in the post-modern world.” “I see a parasite. A sexually depraved miscreant who is seeking only to gratify his basest and most immediate urges.” "Rowdy and unattractive, yet I detect a nobility of attitude and unwavering loyalty... much like the St. Bernard." "But note the eyes... he's a creature barely hanging on to existence. Like a cockroach clinging to sewer grate." "His struggle is man's struggle. He lifts my spirit." “He is a loathsome, offensive brute. Yet I can’t look away.” “He transcends time and space.” “He sickens me.” “I love it.” “Me too.” and his buttocks are sublime... 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayrok Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 "I believe it's the horse." Always in the car when someone fizzles... "RUSTY!" Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
steelerfan1 Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 18 hours ago, dkp993 said: In that vain my all time favorite scene is the episode where Kramer starts a smoking club in his apartment, it’s been going on for a while and Kramer comes into Jerry’s kitchen looking like a “shriveled up old catcher mit”. The next few lines of interaction are hilarious and Jerry can’t stop with the #### eating grin. Kramer concludes with the “Don’t look at me! I’m hideous!” line. Seen it 100’s of times and still laugh every time. 18 hours ago, dkp993 said: 100%. They literally can't get through it. 18 hours ago, AAABatteries said: Watching the outtakes of this and a lot of other scenes is a must for Seinfeld fans. The Elaine and Frank scene outtake with him saying "You want a piece of me?" is great as well. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Cranks Posted May 27 Author Share Posted May 27 9 minutes ago, steelerfan1 said: The Elaine and Frank scene outtake with him saying "You want a piece of me?" is great as well. So good. 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wlwiles Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 On 5/25/2021 at 5:21 PM, dkp993 said: My FFPC team name is Kramerica Inc. I've had Kamara for the last 3 years in a keeper league, so I named mine Kamarica Industries Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the moops Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 My low fuel light has been on for 3 days 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Gally Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 33 minutes ago, the moops said: My low fuel light has been on for 3 days But are you below the slash line? You gotta make it to the dealership..... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaysus Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 Big assman fan here "It was a million to one shot, Doc" 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
AAABatteries Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 1 hour ago, Captain Cranks said: So good. Not sure if anybody called it out exactly but “what the hell does that mean?” delivered by Frank is one of the funniest damn lines in the history of the show. I use it often with my crappy delivery. 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Captain Cranks Posted May 27 Author Share Posted May 27 1 hour ago, AAABatteries said: Not sure if anybody called it out exactly but “what the hell does that mean?” delivered by Frank is one of the funniest damn lines in the history of the show. I use it often with my crappy delivery. Now that you say it, sometimes when someone asks what I mean I say, "that means whatever the hell you want it to mean." 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
yak651 Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 There was no pick, I did not pick.... https://youtu.be/DmGRJWxLqiE 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leroy Hoard Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 Frank Costanza: Let me understand, you got the hen, the chicken and the rooster. The rooster goes with the chicken. So, who's having sex with the hen? George Costanza: Why don't we talk about it another time. Frank Costanza: But you see my point here? You only hear of a hen, a rooster and a chicken. Something's missing! Mrs. Ross: Something's missing all right. Mr. Ross: They're all chickens. The rooster has sex with all of them. Frank Costanza: That's perverse. 4 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
the moops Posted May 27 Share Posted May 27 5 hours ago, Gally said: But are you below the slash line? You gotta make it to the dealership..... I am being serious that the light has been on for 3 days. I only drove 2 of them though. But this morning was one of those and I actually drove to the the dealership for them to put a new seatbelt in as well as perform an oil change. I kinda wish there was something more major so they would have needed to have taken it for a drive. I can imagine them calling me asking if it is OK for them to add some fuel and my response would have been way Kramer inspired. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Angry Beavers Posted May 28 Share Posted May 28 Great Thread - clearly I have not watched enough Seinfeld in my lifetime.. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
E Street Brat Posted May 28 Share Posted May 28 I'm saving it for later. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
identikit Posted May 28 Share Posted May 28 The Parking Garage outtake Even Kramer can't keep it together 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wikkidpissah Posted May 28 Share Posted May 28 26 minutes ago, identikit said: The Parking Garage outtake Even Kramer can't keep it together i hate you soooo much. i can NEVER stop watching Seinfeld "inside looks" thil they run out of DVD extras. its like finding a bag of kettle chips after taking my CBD sleeper. now i'll be up all nite with mental gumburn. thx ever so..... 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dino259 Posted May 28 Share Posted May 28 I had a pony! 2 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Dan Lambskin Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 One of my favorite scenes Favorite Chess Player 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dkp993 Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 I always order “the big salad”. 3 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BobbyLayne Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 We were at a private soiree last weekend and heard my gf of five months tell the sommelier “Merlot? Never heard of it. DID THEY JUST INVENT IT?” She’s a keeper. 5 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
identikit Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 7 hours ago, dkp993 said: I always order “the big salad”. 'It's like a salad, only bigger.' 1 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mookie Gizzy Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 Went to the beach last night. The wife said it smells like the beach. I said the cologne? She didn’t get it 4 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Floppo Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 On 5/25/2021 at 7:26 PM, Mookie Gizzy said: 5/25/2021 at 6:40 PM, El Floppo said: Go ahead...take the pen. I can't believe he took the pen. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Alex P Keaton Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 Ridicurous 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
MAC_32 Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 I haven't don't this in a while, but this thread is motivating me to dig this out of my shtick closet. Walk into someone else's house then before anyone says anything: 'Welp, I have gonorrhea.' 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Leroy Hoard Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 https://seinfeldmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/476B6DF1-F71D-4562-8CF6-09AB1099922C.jpeg 2 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mookie Gizzy Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 4 hours ago, El Floppo said: I can't believe he took the pen. And the scotch tape 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Drunken knight Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 I love the sequence where Kramer is attempting to guess George’s password 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Getzlaf15 Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 7 hours ago, identikit said: 'It's like a salad, only bigger.' I just ordered one. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Getzlaf15 Posted May 29 Share Posted May 29 5 hours ago, Leroy Hoard said: https://seinfeldmemes.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/02/476B6DF1-F71D-4562-8CF6-09AB1099922C.jpeg I like the one where he's basted like a chicken. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dino259 Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 9 hours ago, MAC_32 said: I haven't don't this in a while, but this thread is motivating me to dig this out of my shtick closet. Walk into someone else's house then before anyone says anything: 'Welp, I have gonorrhea.' From the tractor seat? 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 Coworker and I are huge fans of the show and quote stuff all the time. We are in HR so it’s usually related to some goofy scenario at work. Examples: Serenity Now! (I use this all the time since I deal with unions at my job. I even have a button at my work I can press that has Frank Costanza say it for me - and yes, I know, insanity later). Thats’s gold Jerry gold. My coworker actually saw Bania in Vegas one year and got a pic with him and had him say that for him. And you want to be my latex salesman. Sidler. We have a coworker that does nothing and that’s been even worse since the pandemic hit so we call him the sidler. I even gave him a pack of tic tacs one day and he didn’t connect why I was giving those to him. Giddy up! Was that wrong? Was I not supposed to be doing that? Because I tell ya I’ve got to plead ignorance then... Hoochy Mama Anytown USA I always do the Kramer “why don’t you just tell me what movie you want to see...” when he was trying to be Moviephone. I usually use that with the wife when she is trying to figure out where to eat or do and isn’t offering any ideas. Those are just the ones off the top of my head. I use a bunch from Curb Your Enthusiasm too since the shows are so similar due to Larry David. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 On 5/25/2021 at 6:57 PM, bostonfred said: Anyone can take reservations... the hard part is keeping the reservation The writing in this show is so brilliant. This happened to me at a rental car place once too. I wasn’t as calm as Jerry about it but this scene totally came to mind as I dealt with the situation. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 Whenever I order a hot dog I do the Kramer movie theater “one hot dog!” when I order. Then I bite in and say “interesting texture”. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 I’ve used the uromysatisis excuse on the wife too when I’ve had to piss while driving on a road trip. Told her I could die if we didn’t get off the road soon. She even tried googling it to figure out what I was talking about. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 (edited) I’ve also had “ a coincidence is a coincidence there are no large or small coincidences” conversation with people before too. Edited May 30 by skillz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 When looking for parking spots I always tell the wife I have a foolproof system of going for the best spots first and then going in concentric circles until I find the next best one. That’s a shame is used a lot by me too. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 On 5/28/2021 at 7:44 PM, dino259 said: I had a pony! I have a friend who is dating a Polish girl. When she told him once she grew up in Poland he asked her if she had a pony and she looked at him like “WTF are you talking about?”. Somehow they’re still together years later and he showed her the Seinfeld episode eventually to show her what he was talking about. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 One last one and then I will stop clogging the thread: Human Fund. I use this one all the time around the holidays. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
skillz Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 (edited) I lied. A few more: Look to the cookie. I use this a lot these days. If you’re one of us you will take a bite. That’s a lot of potatoes! Frankly it sounds made up. It’s all about me, everybody look at me, I am so pretty, love me, want me... No soup for you! Edited May 30 by skillz Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
El Floppo Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 1 hour ago, skillz said: I always do the Kramer “why don’t you just tell me what movie you want to see...” when he was trying to be Moviephone. I usually use that with the wife when she is trying to figure out where to eat or do and isn’t offering any ideas. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jayrok Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 “George, we’ve had it with you. Understand? We love you like a son, but even parents have limits.” - Frank “I’m not the one going to hell.” - Puddy 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ghost Rider Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 On 5/29/2021 at 8:27 AM, identikit said: 'It's like a salad, only bigger.' No, no, let's get the quote right! "It's a salad, only bigger, with lots of stuff in it." 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
dickey moe Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 I like muttering "Newman" when things go wrong. 3 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
peaces Posted May 30 Share Posted May 30 On my mom's side of the family we have a vacation house on cape cod, sometimes I'll break out the "cherish the cabin" line. 1 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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