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If she comes back and says the PT taught her to throw a Ritz cracker over 100yds, THEN I will buy the fishing trip til then, I am waiting right here for 16 when he comes crawling back to us.
And/or she starts requesting kinky moves/positions that they have never done before.
So she wants to take things slow with someone she screwed for several years, but has not told you specifically why? And you haven't asked? That's crazy. JMHO, you are creating excuses for her, because you don't want the truth. You aren't dating Taylor Swift. They have this new invention called condoms; my guess is even if you pull one of them out you get some lame excuse (that will of course make perfect sense to you, because you believe everything). 95% chance she is keeping you close, but not too close. The only chance you have of living in reality is if you ask the tough questions and put her feet to the fire. Why aren't you? Because you don't want to lose her, that's why. You really haven't learned a darn thing about being the sort of no-nonsense assertive guy this woman, or any woman, would want to stay with. You basically faked being strong, got her back on that ruse, and then immediately reverted to a hopeless lump of play dough. Enjoy your future of subservience.
I did ask her and she said she just wanted to start over and take things from the beginning again. Of course she also mentioned she didn't know what I have been doing since we broke up.So pretty much she wants a STD test.
I have no idea what this means. Did you take it slow in the beginning when you met her? Did she take it slow with the PT? I just think she knows exactly how to tell you what you want to hear. You're a hopeless romantic. To me her apology to you for running off with another guy should not be using sex as a weapon against you. What is your response on condoms?
With me... no? We were making out the night we met and secks by the 3rd date.Why does the apology have to require sex right away? Like I said we'll see after we come back from our respective trips, I get an STD test, and our Labor Day get away. If there's no'BigJim® said:
by then it's over. I think we already know where I stand in regards to condoms.
JFC... you're hopeless.With me... no? We were making out the night we met and secks by the 3rd date.Why does the apology have to require sex right away? Like I said we'll see after we come back from our respective trips, I get an STD test, and our Labor Day get away. If there's no'BigJim® said:
I think we already know where I stand in regards to condoms.
'BigJim® said:
If there hasn't been some seriously awesome makeup sex something is seriously off here. Sounds like she is keeping you around because you're familiar and she can't be alone... but is looking for someone else. That, or she has an STD and doesn't want you to find out about it.
You can't be ####### serious.With me... no? We were making out the night we met and secks by the 3rd date.Why does the apology have to require sex right away? Like I said we'll see after we come back from our respective trips, I get an STD test, and our Labor Day get away. If there's no'BigJim® said:
I think we already know where I stand in regards to condoms.
Apparently he is worse off then we thought. Even little arguments should end in make up sex. Given the magnitude of this, he should be having his way with this chick anytime anywhere. It would be a deal breaker for me not to have had any action yet. Now he is going to give it to labor day??!! Is her hooo ha is on summer vacation?You can't be ####### serious.With me... no? We were making out the night we met and secks by the 3rd date.Why does the apology have to require sex right away? Like I said we'll see after we come back from our respective trips, I get an STD test, and our Labor Day get away. If there's no'BigJim® said:
I think we already know where I stand in regards to condoms.
Legendary amounts of fail in this post. Congratulations, I do believe you set a new record of stupid.'No. 16 said:
'Mister Martie said:
BigJim absolutely nailed it. Them getting back together? Disaster, but we all knew it was coming. Getting back together but no sex in order to "take it slow"? You're a basketball fan, right? To put this in a way you may understand, she's team USA. You're Nigeria.
I think you are on to something.
Oh, ok this makes sense to me now. She wants to take things slow from the beginning again, even though you never took things slow in the beginning the first time around. She slept with a PT stranger (that we know of), presumably without insisting on an STD test(because she knows where he'd been the rest of his life before her?), but has reservations on sex with you, and you assume she's concerned you got an STD apart from her a mere 6 months? And this all makes unspoken sense to you? I posted a month ago my guess that if you pressed her on getting back together, she would tell you she wants to take it slow because she really only wants her own short term emotional needs met with you. Gee whiz, guess what happened. Now you're speculating what hoops you can jump through to become spongeworthy. Normal people have frank conversations.You "I don't understand. Why do you want to take it slow?" *"Because I'm unsure"; "I don't want to rush into this" (There's your answer on where you stand. Hopefully you tell her to give you a call once she has it all figured out, and not before then. Interpretation: I'm not sticking around meeting your emotional needs like your cabana boy - you're in or out, I won't be jerked around while you leave your options open)*"I don't know if you have an STD" You: "That seems like an odd concern coming from a slut, but ok, I'll wear condoms until I get tested. I have one in my pocket right now." (Bluff called, anticipate next excuse that tells you where you stand, probably the above response)I think you know deep down the truths that sort of dialogue leads to, and that's why you're playing this out in your head instead of confronting it. If you can't communicate like that, you have zero chance of gaining her respect.With me... no? We were making out the night we met and secks by the 3rd date.Why does the apology have to require sex right away? Like I said we'll see after we come back from our respective trips, I get an STD test, and our Labor Day get away. If there's no'BigJim® said:
in about a week, when those "feelings" start to come creeping around in your head, and you're seriously considering just meeting her quickly for a quick talk, look back at the bold above. it tells you all you need to know about what she thinks about you. you are not a priority in her life anymore.
I know you don't, but you should feel great. You stopped making pie in the sky excuses for your ex, you were assertive, and you got an answer you desparately needed to move forward in reality. You probably caught her completely off guard, which is why she didn't have more time to come up with a more manipulative fairy dust response. It just can't be emphasized enough how much you needed this based on your prior post. Now go dust off that iDate profile and meet some mentally healthy women you can start at square one with. You are so young, and you need to give dating other women a legitimate chance... not just seeing them to show up the ex or bide time for her return. You were never going to build anything with anyone until this happened. Congratulations!
Problem here is that this confident display will make him more desirable to Alyssa. And she will say and do things that he will want to hear and see. And thus we will begin the cycle all over again.I know you don't, but you should feel great. You stopped making pie in the sky excuses for your ex, you were assertive, and you got an answer you desparately needed to move forward in reality. You probably caught her completely off guard, which is why she didn't have more time to come up with a more manipulative fairy dust response. It just can't be emphasized enough how much you needed this based on your prior post. Now go dust off that iDate profile and meet some mentally healthy women you can start at square one with. You are so young, and you need to give dating other women a legitimate chance... not just seeing them to show up the ex or bide time for her return. You were never going to build anything with anyone until this happened. Congratulations!
16 found out his ex wanted to keep boning the PT but keep him around for emotional support.
Do this, and contact the teacher that might be friends of friends with the ex. Burn that bridge before it comes back to haunt you. :thumbsup:I know you don't, but you should feel great. You stopped making pie in the sky excuses for your ex, you were assertive, and you got an answer you desparately needed to move forward in reality. You probably caught her completely off guard, which is why she didn't have more time to come up with a more manipulative fairy dust response. It just can't be emphasized enough how much you needed this based on your prior post. Now go dust off that iDate profile and meet some mentally healthy women you can start at square one with. You are so young, and you need to give dating other women a legitimate chance... not just seeing them to show up the ex or bide time for her return. You were never going to build anything with anyone until this happened. Congratulations!
That goes without saying. But he's been either acting or making excuses for her for 6 months. I think his assertiveness earned him a glimpse of the real her, and hopefully put her prior manipulation into clear focus. That can't hurt him. Not to mention at least he'll get sex next time; I'm guessing the words 'take it slow' will be out of her vocabulary go-forward. That train has left the station. Still, I hope 16 realizes whatever she said about PT, he's definitely getting the manipulation version. This meeting is not to exchange things that could be mailed. It's probably a contrived arrangement she planned for one last effort to get the PT back. She's probably being semi-honest that's why she was holding 16 off (so she could honestly tell PT she hadn't slept with 16, and so she could let 16 down easier if it worked). That's my read anyway.Problem here is that this confident display will make him more desirable to Alyssa. And she will say and do things that he will want to hear and see. And thus we will begin the cycle all over again.I know you don't, but you should feel great. You stopped making pie in the sky excuses for your ex, you were assertive, and you got an answer you desparately needed to move forward in reality. You probably caught her completely off guard, which is why she didn't have more time to come up with a more manipulative fairy dust response. It just can't be emphasized enough how much you needed this based on your prior post. Now go dust off that iDate profile and meet some mentally healthy women you can start at square one with. You are so young, and you need to give dating other women a legitimate chance... not just seeing them to show up the ex or bide time for her return. You were never going to build anything with anyone until this happened. Congratulations!
Tell us again why you're putting so much effort into a relationship with a woman who cheated on her previous bf, you, and her current bf.Also, please explain why you're willing to give a woman another chance who starts out with, "I'm sorry for being so heartless..."You're not your dad. This relationship isn't the same as the one he saved. Walk away. She's already told you that she, "Honestly, I'm not sure yet what I want. I'm not sure I can make you 100% happy."Wake up.Is her new cell number the same as she the one she lost on vacation?
used ever!
sad but spot on.
