jplvr
Footballguy
Dude, you have 6 months.So, there's a report we run for one of our customers. It's due by 10:00 Easter and reports on the previous day's activities.
Dude, you have 6 months.So, there's a report we run for one of our customers. It's due by 10:00 Easter and reports on the previous day's activities.
Sunday night bourbon.What's going on here?No. Christ. My original math was right. Unless that guy hedged, the 49ers screwed him.Never mind, I was doing some ####### math.Can't believe some dude might be about to not win @100K tonight. Hate it for him.
Have you given notice yet?So, there's a report we run for one of our customers. It's due by 10:00 Easter and reports on the previous day's activities. Normally, this report gets sent by my operation on the same day within 30 minute of said activity's completion, beating the deadline regularly by something like 16 hours.Last week, said activity was not performed on Thursday so that report to the customer was not generated (completion of the activity generates the poke to send the report - a process flaw but understandable). On Friday an email is sent from the customer to my office requesting the report. This is sent early Eastern time so no one is in the office to respond. A follow up email is sent 90 minutes later to which I personally respond immediately apologizing, explaining what happened and attaching the report.Today, I get an email chain forwarded from my boss that travelled up the chain at our customer #####ing and moaning about not getting the report, complaining about emailing 3 times to get a response (only emailed twice) and failing to mention that normally we are outstanding in respect to this compliance.Since I've got a new job and all, I am having a hard time not responding to them with sternly worded lesson on partnership and not treating high performance vendors like delinquent children and exaggerating to put them in a negative light when a rare issue pops up.Someone talk me down.
No. And I need to let you know that I am a champion divorce predictor.MamaJose: Well I just called to let you know that your brother and his wife are separating.Me: Called it.MamaJose: What?Me: Nevermind. That's too bad.Is it in bad taste to bet on a couple getting divorced? I've been right so many times that I feel I wouldn't have to work if I had put money on people's marriages failing.
All I have running through my head is that little UPS "logistics" jingle.So, there's a report we run for one of our customers. It's due by 10:00 Easter and reports on the previous day's activities. Normally, this report gets sent by my operation on the same day within 30 minute of said activity's completion, beating the deadline regularly by something like 16 hours.Last week, said activity was not performed on Thursday so that report to the customer was not generated (completion of the activity generates the poke to send the report - a process flaw but understandable). On Friday an email is sent from the customer to my office requesting the report. This is sent early Eastern time so no one is in the office to respond. A follow up email is sent 90 minutes later to which I personally respond immediately apologizing, explaining what happened and attaching the report.Today, I get an email chain forwarded from my boss that travelled up the chain at our customer #####ing and moaning about not getting the report, complaining about emailing 3 times to get a response (only emailed twice) and failing to mention that normally we are outstanding in respect to this compliance.Since I've got a new job and all, I am having a hard time not responding to them with sternly worded lesson on partnership and not treating high performance vendors like delinquent children and exaggerating to put them in a negative light when a rare issue pops up.Someone talk me down.
who are you and why are you answering for Fuller.?you don't stop producing (they start being absorbed back into your body) but they shouldn't be able to get out of teh penis. The problem is that these guys are still on the exit side of the snip, meaning that I could still possibly cause the creation of a little snot-nosed crap-eater.Are you trying to tell me that after a vasectomy you're supposed to stop producing? I did not know that.I obviously do not just produce semen, but more like tiny Navy Seals. I had a vasectomy 4-1/2 months ago, and since then I have had sex with my wife countless times and spanked it myself at least once (I may have those figures reversed), and as of yesterday SOME OF THOSE LITTLE TOUGH BASTARDS ARE STILL HANGING AROUND.I'm tired of collecting samples. Do you have any idea how hard it is to shoot it into that cup without making a mess?!?!
I have no idea | | |who are you and why are you answering for Fuller.?you don't stop producing (they start being absorbed back into your body) but they shouldn't be able to get out of teh penis. The problem is that these guys are still on the exit side of the snip, meaning that I could still possibly cause the creation of a little snot-nosed crap-eater.Are you trying to tell me that after a vasectomy you're supposed to stop producing? I did not know that.I obviously do not just produce semen, but more like tiny Navy Seals. I had a vasectomy 4-1/2 months ago, and since then I have had sex with my wife countless times and spanked it myself at least once (I may have those figures reversed), and as of yesterday SOME OF THOSE LITTLE TOUGH BASTARDS ARE STILL HANGING AROUND.
I'm tired of collecting samples. Do you have any idea how hard it is to shoot it into that cup without making a mess?!?!
didn't notice that beforeI have no idea | | |who are you and why are you answering for Fuller.?
V V V
congratsYesterday had the perfect timing.11am, wife called her doctor about a discharge she was having (she is 38.5 weeks pregnant)got to the hospital by 12watched the Bears game from a hospital room as the doc talked to my wife.4:00 went into the OR for her newly scheduled C-section.4:25 walked out pushing my new daughter.Wife has had some minor complications but today things are looking up.I can't imagine having to hold a "normal" sized baby. Both my daughters were 9+lbs and over 21" long, and they are small to me. What does a 6lb baby look like?
But who lost $100k? I'm hooked now.YSR said:Sunday night bourbon.jplvr said:What's going on here?No. Christ. My original math was right. Unless that guy hedged, the 49ers screwed him.Never mind, I was doing some ####### math.Can't believe some dude might be about to not win @100K tonight. Hate it for him.
If he was smart and hedged at -3.5, he should be fine with the $50KThis guyBut who lost $100k? I'm hooked now.
My two have been 5-6 and 6-5, your 9 lb. babies freak me out.Yesterday had the perfect timing.11am, wife called her doctor about a discharge she was having (she is 38.5 weeks pregnant)got to the hospital by 12watched the Bears game from a hospital room as the doc talked to my wife.4:00 went into the OR for her newly scheduled C-section.4:25 walked out pushing my new daughter.Wife has had some minor complications but today things are looking up.I can't imagine having to hold a "normal" sized baby. Both my daughters were 9+lbs and over 21" long, and they are small to me. What does a 6lb baby look like?
I can't remember. It isn't as high as you'd think, at least not for us regular schmucks, regardless of how much cash you carry into the place.No, it's more, or so I've heard...
He's still got Notre Dame and LSU in his back pocketDid Scupper renounce the Packers when Favre came to the Vikings?
Congrats I've had a 4 pounder and an almost 8 pounder...had to have clothes and a blanket on the littlest one just to cuddle him.Yesterday had the perfect timing.11am, wife called her doctor about a discharge she was having (she is 38.5 weeks pregnant)got to the hospital by 12watched the Bears game from a hospital room as the doc talked to my wife.4:00 went into the OR for her newly scheduled C-section.4:25 walked out pushing my new daughter.Wife has had some minor complications but today things are looking up.I can't imagine having to hold a "normal" sized baby. Both my daughters were 9+lbs and over 21" long, and they are small to me. What does a 6lb baby look like?
Don't forget Duke.He's still got Notre Dame and LSU in his back pocketDid Scupper renounce the Packers when Favre came to the Vikings?
good pointDon't forget Duke.He's still got Notre Dame and LSU in his back pocketDid Scupper renounce the Packers when Favre came to the Vikings?
Alabama too.good pointDon't forget Duke.He's still got Notre Dame and LSU in his back pocketDid Scupper renounce the Packers when Favre came to the Vikings?
From chad millman at espnIf he was smart and hedged at -3.5, he should be fine with the $50KThis guyBut who lost $100k? I'm hooked now.
And there is that poor guy in Delaware. You may have heard his story floating around the past couple of days, which I first read about in The Big Lead. Two weeks ago, a man walked into one of Delaware's sports books and played a $5, 15-team parlay that pays $100,000. In Week 4, he won all 14 games on his ticket. But, because there were only 14 games played, he had to choose a Week 5 game. He picked the San Francisco 49ers, who were plus-3 at home versus the Eagles. This was before Michael Vick's injury. After the news, the line then moved six points to the Niners minus-3. This is the kind of value you can't even find at Walmart in this economy. And yet, he stood to make $99,995 on his investment if the Niners could cover. This poor guy suffered through Alex Smith meltdowns, boos reigning down and Mike Singletary looking like Sybil on her worst days. Yet with a minute left, he still had a shot at that $100K. Until he was undone once more by a Smith interception. The Niners lost 27-24.
I checked with the folks at the Delaware Lottery Monday morning to get their take on how it all played out. "He played a special card for the $100K prize," said Vernon Kirk, the Lottery's principal deputy. "This is a strictly ties-lose card, and, well, he lost. But we were rooting for the guy."
From Chad Millman at ESPN:If he was smart and hedged at -3.5, he should be fine with the $50KThis guyBut who lost $100k? I'm hooked now.
And there is that poor guy in Delaware. You may have heard his story floating around the past couple of days, which I first read about in The Big Lead. Two weeks ago, a man walked into one of Delaware's sports books and played a $5, 15-team parlay that pays $100,000. In Week 4, he won all 14 games on his ticket. But, because there were only 14 games played, he had to choose a Week 5 game. He picked the San Francisco 49ers, who were plus-3 at home versus the Eagles. This was before Michael Vick's injury. After the news, the line then moved six points to the Niners minus-3. This is the kind of value you can't even find at Walmart in this economy. And yet, he stood to make $99,995 on his investment if the Niners could cover. This poor guy suffered through Alex Smith meltdowns, boos reigning down and Mike Singletary looking like Sybil on her worst days. Yet with a minute left, he still had a shot at that $100K. Until he was undone once more by a Smith interception. The Niners lost 27-24.
I checked with the folks at the Delaware Lottery Monday morning to get their take on how it all played out. "He played a special card for the $100K prize," said Vernon Kirk, the Lottery's principal deputy. "This is a strictly ties-lose card, and, well, he lost. But we were rooting for the guy."
Maybe they'll make an offer you can't refuse.So.... sent my resignation letter to the owners of the company yesterday. Very nice letter, expressing regret, appreciation; laying out a plan for my replacement, etc.I hear nothing back all day yesterday. This morning, I re-forwarded it and said that I wanted to make sure they had seen it and that I was surprised that they didn't call me to discuss. I get a quick reply back simply saying, "We will talk shortly".So, now I'm sitting here waiting for them to come in my door any minute and tell me to take a hike.
Start hiding office supplies.So.... sent my resignation letter to the owners of the company yesterday. Very nice letter, expressing regret, appreciation; laying out a plan for my replacement, etc.I hear nothing back all day yesterday. This morning, I re-forwarded it and said that I wanted to make sure they had seen it and that I was surprised that they didn't call me to discuss. I get a quick reply back simply saying, "We will talk shortly".So, now I'm sitting here waiting for them to come in my door any minute and tell me to take a hike.
I think that's probably the other option. I just find it starnge that they wouldn't have at least called me yesterday and told me that's what was happening.They were talking about moving me to Houston into corporate sometime in the future because they've liked what I've done here in the two months I've been here.Maybe they'll make an offer you can't refuse.So.... sent my resignation letter to the owners of the company yesterday. Very nice letter, expressing regret, appreciation; laying out a plan for my replacement, etc.I hear nothing back all day yesterday. This morning, I re-forwarded it and said that I wanted to make sure they had seen it and that I was surprised that they didn't call me to discuss. I get a quick reply back simply saying, "We will talk shortly".So, now I'm sitting here waiting for them to come in my door any minute and tell me to take a hike.
"What can we do to keep you?"I think that's probably the other option. I just find it starnge that they wouldn't have at least called me yesterday and told me that's what was happening.They were talking about moving me to Houston into corporate sometime in the future because they've liked what I've done here in the two months I've been here.Maybe they'll make an offer you can't refuse.So.... sent my resignation letter to the owners of the company yesterday. Very nice letter, expressing regret, appreciation; laying out a plan for my replacement, etc.I hear nothing back all day yesterday. This morning, I re-forwarded it and said that I wanted to make sure they had seen it and that I was surprised that they didn't call me to discuss. I get a quick reply back simply saying, "We will talk shortly".So, now I'm sitting here waiting for them to come in my door any minute and tell me to take a hike.
Jimmy "Dynomite" Walker?Hmmm. Maybe it was a black racer not a rat snake. It was uniformly black and very thin,
http://www.uga.edu/srelherp/snakes/colcon.htm
You've only been there two months and your irreplaceable?I think that's probably the other option. I just find it starnge that they wouldn't have at least called me yesterday and told me that's what was happening.They were talking about moving me to Houston into corporate sometime in the future because they've liked what I've done here in the two months I've been here.Maybe they'll make an offer you can't refuse.So.... sent my resignation letter to the owners of the company yesterday. Very nice letter, expressing regret, appreciation; laying out a plan for my replacement, etc.I hear nothing back all day yesterday. This morning, I re-forwarded it and said that I wanted to make sure they had seen it and that I was surprised that they didn't call me to discuss. I get a quick reply back simply saying, "We will talk shortly".So, now I'm sitting here waiting for them to come in my door any minute and tell me to take a hike.
I was thinking more like Manute Bol, but Jimmy works too.Jimmy "Dynomite" Walker?Hmmm. Maybe it was a black racer not a rat snake. It was uniformly black and very thin,
http://www.uga.edu/srelherp/snakes/colcon.htm
I don't see what his irreplaceable has to do with anything.You've only been there two months and your irreplaceable?I think that's probably the other option. I just find it starnge that they wouldn't have at least called me yesterday and told me that's what was happening.They were talking about moving me to Houston into corporate sometime in the future because they've liked what I've done here in the two months I've been here.Maybe they'll make an offer you can't refuse.So.... sent my resignation letter to the owners of the company yesterday. Very nice letter, expressing regret, appreciation; laying out a plan for my replacement, etc.I hear nothing back all day yesterday. This morning, I re-forwarded it and said that I wanted to make sure they had seen it and that I was surprised that they didn't call me to discuss. I get a quick reply back simply saying, "We will talk shortly".So, now I'm sitting here waiting for them to come in my door any minute and tell me to take a hike.
Yes, drop Thomas for Williams.Would you put in a claim to pick for Mike Williams (TB) and drop either Mike Thomas or Mike Wallace? PPR. TIA.
WatYou've only been there two months and your irreplaceable?I think that's probably the other option. I just find it starnge that they wouldn't have at least called me yesterday and told me that's what was happening.They were talking about moving me to Houston into corporate sometime in the future because they've liked what I've done here in the two months I've been here.Maybe they'll make an offer you can't refuse.So.... sent my resignation letter to the owners of the company yesterday. Very nice letter, expressing regret, appreciation; laying out a plan for my replacement, etc.I hear nothing back all day yesterday. This morning, I re-forwarded it and said that I wanted to make sure they had seen it and that I was surprised that they didn't call me to discuss. I get a quick reply back simply saying, "We will talk shortly".So, now I'm sitting here waiting for them to come in my door any minute and tell me to take a hike.
With the staff declaring themselves the preseason winners, that left just one spot in the five week contest for the other ten of us. And we're talking about the best of the best, a group of players selected for their ability to make funny captions for photos or build venn diagrams, which is far more challenging than traditional fantasy football tests of skill like writing haiku. Beating out a field of contestants featuring Nipsey, Homer J Simpson, wilked, Idiot Boxer, Mr. Pickles, GM, tremendous upside, and yours truly is no small task. So it should be no surprise that the league was won by no small man. Congratulations to Tremendous Upside for leading the pack and continuing on to the second round. Fortunately for the FFA faithful, the staff's (and Rate My Team tool's) prognostications appeared unusually fallable. Taking the place of the highly paid FBG staff were a pair of unpaid FBG team members, as FFA Ombudsman Mr. Pickles and Vice Ombudsman bostonfred took the #2 and #3 spots. This task was made easier by GM's altruism, as two of his top three picks had early bye weeks in this five week contest. GM went on to add stalwarts such as Vincent Jackson and Antonio Bryant, neither of whom is playing football these days. At one point, we had to talk him out of drafting Roethlisberger, who was not scheduled to play a game in the first five weeks of the season. Thus, it should come as no surprise that he took the fourth and final spot in the group that progresses on to a grand prize that includes a free subscription to the rankings of the guys who couldn't beat them. Rumor has it that Rudnicki and Yudkin were recently quoted as saying that fantasy football is 90% luck, and only 10% skill.Wow. Rate My Team loving team Hoart.
QB: Drew Brees, Matt MooreRB: Knowshon Moreno, LaDainian Tomlinson, Darren Sproles, Leon Washington, Sammy Morris, Brian Westbrook, Julius Jones, Ryan TorainWR: Larry Fitzgerald, Steve Smith, Dwayne Bowe, Jabar Gaffney, Mike Williams, Lance MooreTE: Vernon Davis, Anthony Fasano, Daniel FellsPK: Ryan Longwell, John Kasay, Josh ScobeeTD: New York Jets, Cleveland BrownsOverview:We'll start by complimenting you on your strength at quarterback, running back, receiver, and tight end. As you know, it's very difficult in a competitive league to assemble a team that is strong at QB, RB, TE and WR, so just about every team will have a weakness. As you probably suspect, we perceive yours to be none.In 2010, that's pretty incredible. And in this particular case, we absolutely think you're strong enough to be one of the best fantasy teams ever. You've definitely got an insane team here, but we'd feel better if we knew we didn't have to play you.Players we particularly like on this team include Jabar Gaffney, Mike Williams, Brian Westbrook, Dwayne Bowe, Ryan Longwell, well I guess all of your players. We have all these guys ranked ahead of where they are typically being drafted.Bottom line: * With great inseason management, we think you have about a 100 percent chance of making the playoffs. * With good inseason management, we think you have about a 100 percent chance of making the playoffs. * With average inseason management, we think you have a 99 (j/k 100) percent chance of making the playoffs.
What's all this now?I'd like to take a moment to congratulate the winners of league 11 in the ultimate survivor contest, a five week game of skill built to crown the champion of the fantasy football world. In an FFA vs. staff matchup that was described in the FFA as an opportunity for "epic shtick", and amongst FBG staff members as "easy money", top staff members Aaron "Rude Dude" Rudnicki and David "I'm too boring to have a nickname" Yudkin were declared the early favorites in the league by at least two top FBG staff members, including Aaron "Rude Dude" Rudnicki and David "I'm too boring to have a nickname" Yudkin, who noted that fantasy football is roughly 90% skill, 10% luck. The third spot, of course, was reserved for Hoart Nipsington, who used his $0 investment in the FBG rate my team feature to get this gem:
With the staff declaring themselves the preseason winners, that left just one spot in the five week contest for the other ten of us. And we're talking about the best of the best, a group of players selected for their ability to make funny captions for photos or build venn diagrams, which is far more challenging than traditional fantasy football tests of skill like writing haiku. Beating out a field of contestants featuring Nipsey, Homer J Simpson, wilked, Idiot Boxer, Mr. Pickles, GM, tremendous upside, and yours truly is no small task. So it should be no surprise that the league was won by no small man. Congratulations to Tremendous Upside for leading the pack and continuing on to the second round. Fortunately for the FFA faithful, the staff's (and Rate My Team tool's) prognostications appeared unusually fallable. Taking the place of the highly paid FBG staff were a pair of unpaid FBG team members, as FFA Ombudsman Mr. Pickles and Vice Ombudsman bostonfred took the #2 and #3 spots. This task was made easier by GM's altruism, as two of his top three picks had early bye weeks in this five week contest. GM went on to add stalwarts such as Vincent Jackson and Antonio Bryant, neither of whom is playing football these days. At one point, we had to talk him out of drafting Roethlisberger, who was not scheduled to play a game in the first five weeks of the season. Thus, it should come as no surprise that he took the fourth and final spot in the group that progresses on to a grand prize that includes a free subscription to the rankings of the guys who couldn't beat them. Rumor has it that Rudnicki and Yudkin were recently quoted as saying that fantasy football is 90% luck, and only 10% skill.Wow. Rate My Team loving team Hoart.
QB: Drew Brees, Matt MooreRB: Knowshon Moreno, LaDainian Tomlinson, Darren Sproles, Leon Washington, Sammy Morris, Brian Westbrook, Julius Jones, Ryan TorainWR: Larry Fitzgerald, Steve Smith, Dwayne Bowe, Jabar Gaffney, Mike Williams, Lance MooreTE: Vernon Davis, Anthony Fasano, Daniel FellsPK: Ryan Longwell, John Kasay, Josh ScobeeTD: New York Jets, Cleveland BrownsOverview:We'll start by complimenting you on your strength at quarterback, running back, receiver, and tight end. As you know, it's very difficult in a competitive league to assemble a team that is strong at QB, RB, TE and WR, so just about every team will have a weakness. As you probably suspect, we perceive yours to be none.In 2010, that's pretty incredible. And in this particular case, we absolutely think you're strong enough to be one of the best fantasy teams ever. You've definitely got an insane team here, but we'd feel better if we knew we didn't have to play you.Players we particularly like on this team include Jabar Gaffney, Mike Williams, Brian Westbrook, Dwayne Bowe, Ryan Longwell, well I guess all of your players. We have all these guys ranked ahead of where they are typically being drafted.Bottom line: * With great inseason management, we think you have about a 100 percent chance of making the playoffs. * With good inseason management, we think you have about a 100 percent chance of making the playoffs. * With average inseason management, we think you have a 99 (j/k 100) percent chance of making the playoffs.