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Alcoholics Anonymous (1 Viewer)

Doing some research on this for a family friend.
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Yep.My dad's been with NA and AA for eleven years.

What do you need to know?
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Wanting to see any positive/negative experiences associated with it.Looking for alternatives to inpatient programs that could affect his/her career.

 
Believing in a higher power helps.

I would have to say that if this person is at the point where they are considering inpatient therapy, AA might not be enough at this stage.

 
Doing some research on this for a family friend.
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Yep.My dad's been with NA and AA for eleven years.

What do you need to know?
Click to expand...
Wanting to see any positive/negative experiences associated with it.Looking for alternatives to inpatient programs that could affect his/her career.
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He hasn't touched a drink or a pill in 11 years.Positive enough for me.

The criticisms of it are (somewhat) valid--it's not for everyone, IMO.

 
go to the meetings, see what (he) thinks. sometimes people just need to hear from folks like them.... or sometimes, need to say out loud that which they've previously held in.

it's like poking a hole in the dam.

 
go to the meetings, see what (he) thinks. sometimes people just need to hear from folks like them.... or sometimes, need to say out loud that which they've previously held in.

it's like poking a hole in the dam.
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or maybe they gain strength by having others who are going\have gone through the same thing giving them support?
 
go to the meetings,  see what (he) thinks.  sometimes people just need to hear from folks like them.... or sometimes,  need to say out loud that which they've previously held in.

it's like poking a hole in the dam.
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or maybe they gain strength by having others who are going\have gone through the same thing giving them support?
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that too.
 
go to the meetings,  see what (he) thinks.  sometimes people just need to hear from folks like them.... or sometimes,  need to say out loud that which they've previously held in.

it's like poking a hole in the dam.
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or maybe they gain strength by having others who are going\have gone through the same thing giving them support?
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It's both, and quite a bit more.
 
Hi tat,

I've known a few people who've gone through this and it was super helpful. I went to a meeting with him once it was cool. Anytime a bunch of people get together trying to support each other and accomplish a goal, they're often effective.

I don't really know of any downsides to it.

J

 
Hi tat,

I've known a few people who've gone through this and it was super helpful. I went to a meeting with him once it was cool. Anytime a bunch of people get together trying to support each other and accomplish a goal, they're often effective.

I don't really know of any downsides to it.

J
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Giving up control, for one.
 
I went with my high school girlfriend a couple times because her and her mom thought her dad was a drunk and they wanted their own therapy and to learn how to talk to him.

I found it to be a complete waste of time from that point of view.

 
I went with my high school girlfriend a couple times because her and her mom thought her dad was a drunk and they wanted their own therapy and to learn how to talk to him.

I found it to be a complete waste of time from that point of view.
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They should try AlAnon instead.
 
Hi tat,

I've known a few people who've gone through this and it was super helpful. I went to a meeting with him once it was cool. Anytime a bunch of people get together trying to support each other and accomplish a goal, they're often effective.

I don't really know of any downsides to it.

J
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Giving up control, for one.
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"Giving up control"? The point of AA is to regain control...I'm all for it; have seen the benefits for years through my mother and innumerable friends. There are some groups which are better than others of course--because the success of the program is dependent on how involved everyone is, and the interpersonal support. I've seen that same dichotomy through friends of mine in what I think is called "CAA" around here for coke addicts--there's one group which seems to be very helpful while another is not at all. If your friend discovers that it's worthwhile trying again with another area group.

 
Do they put a religious spin on things?
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I have 2 GBs who went to AA. While neither one of them drink anymore, they seriously love them some Jesus now. Almost as if they are stripped of one thing that controls your life and end up with another totally different thing controlling them. Not that that's a bad thing for these guys.... they need it.
 
Hi tat,

I've known a few people who've gone through this and it was super helpful. I went to a meeting with him once it was cool. Anytime a bunch of people get together trying to support each other and accomplish a goal, they're often effective.

I don't really know of any downsides to it.

J
Click to expand...
Giving up control, for one.
Click to expand...
"Giving up control"? The point of AA is to regain control...I'm all for it; have seen the benefits for years through my mother and innumerable friends. There are some groups which are better than others of course--because the success of the program is dependent on how involved everyone is, and the interpersonal support. I've seen that same dichotomy through friends of mine in what I think is called "CAA" around here for coke addicts--there's one group which seems to be very helpful while another is not at all. If your friend discovers that it's worthwhile trying again with another area group.
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You have to give control up to "a higher power" to get your life back in order. How' is that not giving up control?
 
Do they put a religious spin on things?
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Yes, in very basic terms, you have to put it all in God's hands.
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Not very Buddhist of them.
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Exactly why I quit after a couple of years into a 5 year run. That & I didn't want to live with a choice I made at 18 because I had a bad run my last 2 years of high school. I am very thankful for what I learned.
 
Hi tat,

I've known a few people who've gone through this and it was super helpful. I went to a meeting with him once it was cool. Anytime a bunch of people get together trying to support each other and accomplish a goal, they're often effective.

I don't really know of any downsides to it.

J
Click to expand...
Giving up control, for one.
Click to expand...
"Giving up control"? The point of AA is to regain control...I'm all for it; have seen the benefits for years through my mother and innumerable friends. There are some groups which are better than others of course--because the success of the program is dependent on how involved everyone is, and the interpersonal support. I've seen that same dichotomy through friends of mine in what I think is called "CAA" around here for coke addicts--there's one group which seems to be very helpful while another is not at all. If your friend discovers that it's worthwhile trying again with another area group.
Click to expand...
You have to give control up to "a higher power" to get your life back in order. How' is that not giving up control?
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Read my comment above--you have to recognize that you are not alone in this effort and that you will have help, whether that be from a higher power or a support group or both. To expound further on that--faith in a Christian God is definitely intertwined within a lot of the AA ideals just as it is embedded in most of the ideals of this country. If anyone is unable to deal with that then of course they may not be able to handle AA--nor many other places in the US where they might encounter such beliefs. Then again--if you equate "giving up control to a higher power" to giving up control to Jack Black--

I would definitely not recommend that you participate in AA.

 
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2 Members: Incogneto, Running with scissors

:lmao: that there's two Calgary dudes in this thread the morning after the Calgary Stampede boozefest ends...

 
I've been to a meeting. I suspect that groups vary widely depending on the location and luck of the draw, but for me it was a terrible experience. There were about fifty people, all of whom obviously knew each other really well - almost a family-like atmosphere. At the beginning of the meeting you had to introduce yourself as an alcoholic - which at that point I didn't really feel that I was - and so I refused to follow their rule and just introduced myself as someone looking into AA. Well, this did not sit well with the group AT ALL and they refused to move on to the next person until I said the words "and I'm an alcoholic", which I finally did just to stop the harrassment.

At the first break in the meeting I walked out and never considered going back.

 
I've been to a meeting. I suspect that groups vary widely depending on the location and luck of the draw, but for me it was a terrible experience. There were about fifty people, all of whom obviously knew each other really well - almost a family-like atmosphere. At the beginning of the meeting you had to introduce yourself as an alcoholic - which at that point I didn't really feel that I was - and so I refused to follow their rule and just introduced myself as someone looking into AA. Well, this did not sit well with the group AT ALL and they refused to move on to the next person until I said the words "and I'm an alcoholic", which I finally did just to stop the harrassment.

At the first break in the meeting I walked out and never considered going back.
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that is ridiculous and I never saw that happen. one on one...sure, but the whole group. That is whack & I hope all of them drink again.
 
I've been to a meeting. I suspect that groups vary widely depending on the location and luck of the draw, but for me it was a terrible experience. There were about fifty people, all of whom obviously knew each other really well - almost a family-like atmosphere. At the beginning of the meeting you had to introduce yourself as an alcoholic - which at that point I didn't really feel that I was - and so I refused to follow their rule and just introduced myself as someone looking into AA. Well, this did not sit well with the group AT ALL and they refused to move on to the next person until I said the words "and I'm an alcoholic", which I finally did just to stop the harrassment.

At the first break in the meeting I walked out and never considered going back.
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Ribbon bullies!!
 
No AA, but I do regularly attend a support group for men struggling with testicular cancer, a group for t.b. sufferers, and my bi-monthly sickle cell circle.

 
well, my "friend" has taken it upon themself to go to an outpatient setting, 2-3 hours a day. Luckily, they have 3 weeks of downtime so they should be getting their act together by then.

Thanks for all the info!

 
Do they put a religious spin on things?
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Yes, in very basic terms, you have to put it all in God's hands.
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I guess it depends on the group as to how heavy an influence religion plays. I have immediate relatives in AA and have been to several meetings. My understanding of "higher power" is that it is a personal definition and that religion has rarely come up in the meetings I've attended.One explanation I have heard used for "higher power" is to ask a person to lift a railroad tie, used to edge a parking lot or in landscaping. He cannot do it. Now if ten of you go out there, you can lift it. That's the higher power -- the power of the group. Of course if you're religious, your higher power will probably be different.

AA, like anything else, isn't for everyone but it has helped a lot of people.

 
Somewhat off topic, but here it goes anyways.

I'm 27 and I found out last Friday after unsuccessfully trying to get my wife pregnant for the last nine months, that I need to cut back to no more than 3-4 beers a week to be able to get the job done. :(

Drinking isn't the cause of my problem, but I was informed I personnaly have to change my habits if we want to cenceive. I don't think of myself as an alcohloic, but ever since high school, I haven't gone through an extended period of my life where drinking wasn't something I did on a regular basis. Sporting events, going out to eat, bars... stuff like that is always what we have done and with the friends I keep, drinking is just a normal part of things.

The weekdays should be fine as working, going to the gym and taking care of the house/pets usually keep me busy. However, I know I'm going to be in for a shock the first time I hit up a Rangers game or meet up with frinds at a resturant/bar and am not able to get my usual "good" buzz on.

Hopefully, I'll be able to work thourgh this on my own, but AA has definetely been on my mind the last few days.

 
Somewhat off topic, but here it goes anyways.

I'm 27 and I found out last Friday after unsuccessfully trying to get my wife pregnant for the last nine months, that I need to cut back to no more than 3-4 beers a week to be able to get the job done. :(

Drinking isn't the cause of my problem, but I was informed I personnaly have to change my habits if we want to cenceive.  I don't think of myself as an alcohloic, but ever since high school, I haven't gone through an extended period of my life where drinking wasn't something I did on a regular basis.  Sporting events, going out to eat, bars... stuff like that is always what we have done and with the friends I keep, drinking is just a normal part of things.

The weekdays should be fine as working, going to the gym and taking care of the house/pets usually keep me busy.  However, I know I'm going to be in for a shock the first time I hit up a Rangers game or meet up with frinds at a resturant/bar and am not able to get my usual "good" buzz on.

Hopefully, I'll be able to work thourgh this on my own, but AA has definetely been on my mind the last few days.
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If only consuming alcohol could actually be used as a form of contraception... :banned: "Honey, hold that position I've gotta go pop a Sierra Nevada, I'll be right back"

 
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I haven't heard much here that even remotely reflects my experience in AA. In most of the groups I have attended we don't talk about alcohol all that much. Most of my time has been spent learning how to live. Basic life skills like honesty, humility, accountability, balance, dealing with fear, dealing with anger, making amends etc.

It has been a tremendously positive influence in my life. That being said no one goes to AA because they want to. They go because there are no other options. When I ##### about AA my sponsor generally tells me, "If your way works then go do it."

People talk about it like it is a cult. AA doesn't recruit. AA doesn't advertise. AA doesn't call you if you stop showing up, they will not take outside contributions nor endorse or be affiliated with any other organization and yet have millions of members. There must be something going on there.

My alcohol problems were severe and life threatening. My "medicine" is to go meet with other alcoholics and drink coffee a couple of times a week. Considering the time and effort it took to drink and use it is an amazing alternative and has been nothing short of miraculous.

AA talks about the term "surrender". The first step of the twelve is to admit you are powerless over alcohol. It is the first step for a reason because it is the last thing in the world an alcoholic wants to do.

AA does say you need to develop a personal relationship with a higher power. That can be Jesus, the group, Buddah, "spirituality" etc. but you do need to find a higher power you can do business with.

I was on the fence about my own alcoholism until I heard a guy in a meeting say, "I didn't get in trouble every time I drank, but every time I got in trouble I had been drinking." Hit me like a lightning bolt. Things have been gradually going uphill since.

 
I haven't heard much here that even remotely reflects my experience in AA. In most of the groups I have attended we don't talk about alcohol all that much. Most of my time has been spent learning how to live. Basic life skills like honesty, humility, accountability, balance, dealing with fear, dealing with anger, making amends etc.

It has been a tremendously positive influence in my life. That being said no one goes to AA because they want to. They go because there are no other options. When I ##### about AA my sponsor generally tells me, "If your way works then go do it."

People talk about it like it is a cult. AA doesn't recruit. AA doesn't advertise. AA doesn't call you if you stop showing up, they will not take outside contributions nor endorse or be affiliated with any other organization and yet have millions of members. There must be something going on there.

My alcohol problems were severe and life threatening. My "medicine" is to go meet with other alcoholics and drink coffee a couple of times a week. Considering the time and effort it took to drink and use it is an amazing alternative and has been nothing short of miraculous.

AA talks about the term "surrender". The first step of the twelve is to admit you are powerless over alcohol. It is the first step for a reason because it is the last thing in the world an alcoholic wants to do.

AA does say you need to develop a personal relationship with a higher power. That can be Jesus, the group, Buddah, "spirituality" etc. but you do need to find a higher power you can do business with.

I was on the fence about my own alcoholism until I heard a guy in a meeting say, "I didn't get in trouble every time I drank, but every time I got in trouble I had been drinking." Hit me like a lightning bolt. Things have been gradually going uphill since.
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:goodposting:
 
No AA, but I do regularly attend a support group for men struggling with testicular cancer, a group for t.b. sufferers, and my bi-monthly sickle cell circle.
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what about blood parasites?
 
No AA, but I do regularly attend a support group for men struggling with testicular cancer, a group for t.b. sufferers, and my bi-monthly sickle cell circle.
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Hiiii, Cornelius. It's okay to cry.
 
I believe AA has about a 10% success rate. It's not for everyone, but it does help some of the people who are in the worst shape.

 
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