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Deadly Animal Draft (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter cosjobs
- Start date
But I don't think anyone is going to be drafting Nicole Brown...
Noodlefish
Bloomin' brilliant...
I'm here...
Mr.Squidward
Footballguy
Gives new meaning to the popular phrase 'in before the lock'.
gorf
Footballguy
After much debate, I have settled on the largest land animal found in the Western hemisphere. This first-round talent weighs in at 2200 pounds, has sharp horns, is built like a rock, and will destroy you all.
Ladies and Gentlemen, the AMERICAN BISON (Bison bison bison)
The best description of a bison's temperament is UNPREDICTABLE. They usually appear peaceful, unconcerned, even lazy, yet they may attack anything, often without warning or apparent reason. To a casual observer, a grazing bison appears slow and clumsy, but he can outrun, out turn, and traverse rougher terrain than all but the fleetest horse. They can move a speeds of up to thirty-five miles per hour, and cover long distances at a deceptively fast lumbering gallop.
Their most obvious weapon is the horns that both male and female have. But their head, with its massive skull, can be used as a battering ram, effectively using the momentum produced by two thousand pounds moving at thirty miles per hour! The hind legs can also be used to kill or maim with devastating effect. At the time bison ran wild, they were rated second only to the Alaska brown bear as a potential killer, more dangerous than the grizzly bear. In the words of early naturalists, they were a dangerous, savage animal who feared no other animal, and in prime condition could best any foe. A bull with lowered head, snorting and pawing the ground, with tail stiffly upraised, conveys a universal warning of danger to all nearby that is impossible to ignore!
They will charge at 35 mph and hit you with all 2200 pounds of their weight. What can survive that? It's like getting hit by a car.
Ladies and Gentlemen, the AMERICAN BISON (Bison bison bison)
The best description of a bison's temperament is UNPREDICTABLE. They usually appear peaceful, unconcerned, even lazy, yet they may attack anything, often without warning or apparent reason. To a casual observer, a grazing bison appears slow and clumsy, but he can outrun, out turn, and traverse rougher terrain than all but the fleetest horse. They can move a speeds of up to thirty-five miles per hour, and cover long distances at a deceptively fast lumbering gallop.
Their most obvious weapon is the horns that both male and female have. But their head, with its massive skull, can be used as a battering ram, effectively using the momentum produced by two thousand pounds moving at thirty miles per hour! The hind legs can also be used to kill or maim with devastating effect. At the time bison ran wild, they were rated second only to the Alaska brown bear as a potential killer, more dangerous than the grizzly bear. In the words of early naturalists, they were a dangerous, savage animal who feared no other animal, and in prime condition could best any foe. A bull with lowered head, snorting and pawing the ground, with tail stiffly upraised, conveys a universal warning of danger to all nearby that is impossible to ignore!
They will charge at 35 mph and hit you with all 2200 pounds of their weight. What can survive that? It's like getting hit by a car.
Last edited by a moderator:
Noodlefish
Bloomin' brilliant...
I'm off home in 30mins... having waited all day to pick.JZilla will have my list. Although I've had to change it since Reg "suggested" my top picks to the entire board...
cosjobs
Footballguy
randall146
Footballguy
Hey Commish - "Bison are susceptible to tuberculosis, anthrax, and brucellosis"Just thought you might like to know.
Where is lunch?
Hipple Long Ware & Peete
Footballguy
I dunno. I'd love to bring in a foreign live in maid if it were reasonably cheap enough. I'm guessing you could get a good one cheap, just b/c someone would want to come over here...:this would be a good place for a lightbulb smilie:
"The bison has a very strong herd instinct. He is neither vicious nor aggressive and will avoid confrontation. Yet if an attempt is made to separate or pen him, he will go through anything to return to the herd."However:"Unlike pure bovine animals the bison has the ability to perspire which explains his tolerance to hot weather. Since the pores through which he perspires can open and close, he is able to adjust to sudden changes in the weather."Maybe he could sweat pools enough to drown other animals or slip them up while your other animals devour them. Quotes from: http://www.ababeefalo.org/aba18.htm
cosjobs
Footballguy
Okay, because of my unrealistic and unwarranted devotion to this thread, I came down to the computer this morning before making coffee or checking my e-mail. I will do that now and if bigjay has not returned by then (lets call it half an hour), I will select a lurker to make his pick.
Courtjester
The Town Drunk
I haven't picked since like page 10........ 
Alright I'll step down. But I'll be around with my pick: http://www.lifesrules.com/wombats.htm if anybody needs me.
Mr.Squidward
Footballguy
I think the wombat is covered with the russian bride pick.Needless to say, I dated a wombat and the experience haunts me to this day (literally).
