GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (6 Viewers)

[kevzilla]

Thinking about moving to Washington. I've heard good things about it.

Well, sure. But after you've smoked a bunch of pot and ####ed some monkeys and hiked with the kristas and gotten blind drunk with fish, then what?

 

[heckmanm]

Thinking about moving to Washington. I've heard good things about it.

Well, sure. But after you've smoked a bunch of pot and ####ed some monkeys and hiked with the kristas and gotten blind drunk with fish, then what?

Wait for someone to give you 40 large to go away?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I wonder how much it would take to get my family to just lessen the contact they make with me especially texts.

 

[Limp Ditka]

I wonder how much it would take to get my family to just lessen the contact they make with me especially texts.

Take the picture, Tanner

 

[General Malaise]

Made it through to Week 10 of the Subscriber Contest, but Magic 8-Ball says 'not bloody likely' to go any further. Stupid Nick Folk and bye weeks.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I wonder how much it would take to get my family to just lessen the contact they make with me especially texts.

Take the picture, Tanner

Every day between 9:30-10:00AM my mom texts me and my siblings to let us know she isn't laying on the kitchen floor like in the Life Alert commercials. It's her idea and actually a pretty good one.

So all that really needs to happen is for her to text us with something like "Good morning!" or "I'm up" or "sup, ####ers" or whatever.

But typically she'll tell us her plans for the day "Lunch and then bridge" or "Costco today" or "Golf w/ Barbara".

If she doesn't have anything planned she'll text something like "Happy National Waffle Day" or "Go Giants!". Cool.

Lately though my siblings have turned these "I'm not dead yet" texts into 15-20 text long chains of crap.

Mom: Happy Friday. Lunch and Bridge

Bro1: sounds fun

Bro2: in Oakhurst today

Mom: why oakhutsr/?

Bro2: deb's got a meeting then dinner

Bro1: ill be in tahoe golfing tomorrow

Sis: luky!

Bro2: where?

Mom: golfing again

Mom:?

Mom: he said tAhoe

Bro2: what course

Mom: oh

Sis: if n e1 is ging to b hm tmo i ned 2 brng by stff (my sister insists on texting like this because is saves her about 11 minutes a year)

Mom: i should be

Sis: ok gd

30 minutes later

Mom: haveagret dayjack form gradmsapho

Mom: That was jack using my phone (my 7 year old great nephew...my mom thinks it cute when he uses her phone/computer to do stupid ####)

Sis: Hi Jack!

Bro2: Heya Jack

Bro1: Hi Jack, from G-Pa Greg.

Me: Shut the #### up, all of you*

*not really but I'm pretty close to doing this.

 

[Sammy3469]

Freaking Londoners get all the good new "restaurants":

For Gary Keery, 33, cereal is not merely breakfast food. “It can be a brunch, lunch, dinner, supper and tea!” said the Belfast-born Londoner, who was inspired by a search for “the milky sugary goodness” one hung-over afternoon with his twin, Alan.

At their all-day Cereal Killer Cafe, which opened last December on a Shoreditch strip of curry houses, leather wholesalers and secondhand shops, a bowl of cereal can also be a trip down memory lane.

In line one Thursday at lunchtime, I was dizzied by the choice of 120 boxed cereals lining the exposed-brick walls, plus 30 types of milk (even bubble gum-flavored) and various “cocktails” (think Marshmallow Mateys, Golden Nuggets and a Twinkie in one bowl, from £4.60, or $6.85 at $1.48 to the pound) — and, perhaps, by the saccharine scent.

My off-menu “Campbell’s Classic” (Waffle Crisp, French Toast Crunch) became soppy with custard milk and crushed Cadbury Flake as I watched fuzzy VHS tapes of “Care Bears” and “Friends” downstairs on side-by-side retro TVs. Cabbage Patch Kids and special-edition WWF cereal sat on vintage kitchen cabinets. A band discussed its gig schedule at the next Formica table, stopping to sing along with Hanson’s “MMMBop.”

 

[Limp Ditka]

I wonder how much it would take to get my family to just lessen the contact they make with me especially texts.

Take the picture, Tanner

Every day between 9:30-10:00AM my mom texts me and my siblings to let us know she isn't laying on the kitchen floor like in the Life Alert commercials. It's her idea and actually a pretty good one.

Weird. My grandmother was found on the kitchen floor by her caretaker this morning. Diagnosed with pneumonia and will be spending the night in the hospital.

 

[shuke]

Freaking Londoners get all the good new "restaurants":

For Gary Keery, 33, cereal is not merely breakfast food. “It can be a brunch, lunch, dinner, supper and tea!” said the Belfast-born Londoner, who was inspired by a search for “the milky sugary goodness” one hung-over afternoon with his twin, Alan.

At their all-day Cereal Killer Cafe, which opened last December on a Shoreditch strip of curry houses, leather wholesalers and secondhand shops, a bowl of cereal can also be a trip down memory lane.

In line one Thursday at lunchtime, I was dizzied by the choice of 120 boxed cereals lining the exposed-brick walls, plus 30 types of milk (even bubble gum-flavored) and various “cocktails” (think Marshmallow Mateys, Golden Nuggets and a Twinkie in one bowl, from £4.60, or $6.85 at $1.48 to the pound) — and, perhaps, by the saccharine scent.

My off-menu “Campbell’s Classic” (Waffle Crisp, French Toast Crunch) became soppy with custard milk and crushed Cadbury Flake as I watched fuzzy VHS tapes of “Care Bears” and “Friends” downstairs on side-by-side retro TVs. Cabbage Patch Kids and special-edition WWF cereal sat on vintage kitchen cabinets. A band discussed its gig schedule at the next Formica table, stopping to sing along with Hanson’s “MMMBop.”

I think Chicago had something like this a few years ago.

 

[shuke]

I wonder how much it would take to get my family to just lessen the contact they make with me especially texts.

Take the picture, Tanner

Every day between 9:30-10:00AM my mom texts me and my siblings to let us know she isn't laying on the kitchen floor like in the Life Alert commercials. It's her idea and actually a pretty good one.

So all that really needs to happen is for her to text us with something like "Good morning!" or "I'm up" or "sup, ####ers" or whatever.

But typically she'll tell us her plans for the day "Lunch and then bridge" or "Costco today" or "Golf w/ Barbara".

If she doesn't have anything planned she'll text something like "Happy National Waffle Day" or "Go Giants!". Cool.

Lately though my siblings have turned these "I'm not dead yet" texts into 15-20 text long chains of crap.

Mom: Happy Friday. Lunch and Bridge

Bro1: sounds fun

Bro2: in Oakhurst today

Mom: why oakhutsr/?

Bro2: deb's got a meeting then dinner

Bro1: ill be in tahoe golfing tomorrow

Sis: luky!

Bro2: where?

Mom: golfing again

Mom:?

Mom: he said tAhoe

Bro2: what course

Mom: oh

Sis: if n e1 is ging to b hm tmo i ned 2 brng by stff (my sister insists on texting like this because is saves her about 11 minutes a year)

Mom: i should be

Sis: ok gd

30 minutes later

Mom: haveagret dayjack form gradmsapho

Mom: That was jack using my phone (my 7 year old great nephew...my mom thinks it cute when he uses her phone/computer to do stupid ####)

Sis: Hi Jack!

Bro2: Heya Jack

Bro1: Hi Jack, from G-Pa Greg.

Me: Shut the #### up, all of you*

*not really but I'm pretty close to doing this.

Brutal

 

[General Malaise]

Freaking Londoners get all the good new "restaurants":

For Gary Keery, 33, cereal is not merely breakfast food. “It can be a brunch, lunch, dinner, supper and tea!” said the Belfast-born Londoner, who was inspired by a search for “the milky sugary goodness” one hung-over afternoon with his twin, Alan.

At their all-day Cereal Killer Cafe, which opened last December on a Shoreditch strip of curry houses, leather wholesalers and secondhand shops, a bowl of cereal can also be a trip down memory lane.

In line one Thursday at lunchtime, I was dizzied by the choice of 120 boxed cereals lining the exposed-brick walls, plus 30 types of milk (even bubble gum-flavored) and various “cocktails” (think Marshmallow Mateys, Golden Nuggets and a Twinkie in one bowl, from £4.60, or $6.85 at $1.48 to the pound) — and, perhaps, by the saccharine scent.

My off-menu “Campbell’s Classic” (Waffle Crisp, French Toast Crunch) became soppy with custard milk and crushed Cadbury Flake as I watched fuzzy VHS tapes of “Care Bears” and “Friends” downstairs on side-by-side retro TVs. Cabbage Patch Kids and special-edition WWF cereal sat on vintage kitchen cabinets. A band discussed its gig schedule at the next Formica table, stopping to sing along with Hanson’s “MMMBop.”

This sounds worse than Tanner's family's group texting.

 

[General Malaise]

I haven't had a grandmother in 23 years. You guys have good genes!

 

[Limp Ditka]

Freaking Londoners get all the good new "restaurants":

For Gary Keery, 33, cereal is not merely breakfast food. It can be a brunch, lunch, dinner, supper and tea! said the Belfast-born Londoner, who was inspired by a search for the milky sugary goodness one hung-over afternoon with his twin, Alan.

At their all-day Cereal Killer Cafe, which opened last December on a Shoreditch strip of curry houses, leather wholesalers and secondhand shops, a bowl of cereal can also be a trip down memory lane.

In line one Thursday at lunchtime, I was dizzied by the choice of 120 boxed cereals lining the exposed-brick walls, plus 30 types of milk (even bubble gum-flavored) and various cocktails (think Marshmallow Mateys, Golden Nuggets and a Twinkie in one bowl, from £4.60, or $6.85 at $1.48 to the pound) and, perhaps, by the saccharine scent.

My off-menu Campbells Classic (Waffle Crisp, French Toast Crunch) became soppy with custard milk and crushed Cadbury Flake as I watched fuzzy VHS tapes of Care Bears and Friends downstairs on side-by-side retro TVs. Cabbage Patch Kids and special-edition WWF cereal sat on vintage kitchen cabinets. A band discussed its gig schedule at the next Formica table, stopping to sing along with Hansons MMMBop.

I think Chicago had something like this a few years ago.

Cereality.

It didn't make it.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Oh and it wouldn't be so bad but somewhere in the middle of all of the BS texts somebody might actually post some important information like:

"uncle fred is having surgery monday" or "cousin Lori is getting divorced again". And then they wonder when a month later I say "I had no idea Lori was getting a divorce".

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I haven't had a grandmother in 23 years. You guys have good genes!

Me either.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

You should start adding a random GMTANer to the text thread

 

[Dan Lambskin]

I wonder how much it would take to get my family to just lessen the contact they make with me especially texts.

Take the picture, Tanner

Every day between 9:30-10:00AM my mom texts me and my siblings to let us know she isn't laying on the kitchen floor like in the Life Alert commercials. It's her idea and actually a pretty good one.

Weird. My grandmother was found on the kitchen floor by her caretaker this morning. Diagnosed with pneumonia and will be spending the night in the hospital.

FYI I didn't mean to like this I was quoting above post on mobile

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Freaking Londoners get all the good new "restaurants":

For Gary Keery, 33, cereal is not merely breakfast food. It can be a brunch, lunch, dinner, supper and tea! said the Belfast-born Londoner, who was inspired by a search for the milky sugary goodness one hung-over afternoon with his twin, Alan.

At their all-day Cereal Killer Cafe, which opened last December on a Shoreditch strip of curry houses, leather wholesalers and secondhand shops, a bowl of cereal can also be a trip down memory lane.

In line one Thursday at lunchtime, I was dizzied by the choice of 120 boxed cereals lining the exposed-brick walls, plus 30 types of milk (even bubble gum-flavored) and various cocktails (think Marshmallow Mateys, Golden Nuggets and a Twinkie in one bowl, from £4.60, or $6.85 at $1.48 to the pound) and, perhaps, by the saccharine scent.

My off-menu Campbells Classic (Waffle Crisp, French Toast Crunch) became soppy with custard milk and crushed Cadbury Flake as I watched fuzzy VHS tapes of Care Bears and Friends downstairs on side-by-side retro TVs. Cabbage Patch Kids and special-edition WWF cereal sat on vintage kitchen cabinets. A band discussed its gig schedule at the next Formica table, stopping to sing along with Hansons MMMBop.

Sounds like a lost script for You're The Worst

 

[Limp Ditka]

I haven't had a grandmother in 23 years. You guys have good genes!

Technically my step-fathers mom, but she's been around since day one of my memories, so she's my grandmother.

She's the only GP I've had for the last 35 years. Her only son (my stepfather) is dead and her brothers have been gone for probably 30 years. Its safe to say that she the exception, not the rule.

She 4'10'' and probably weighs 80 pounds. Used to drink Vodka like water (her dog's name was Martini) and was never without a Benson & Hedges Ultra Light in her hand.

She quit both years ago, but how she's still alive at 88 is beyond me.

 

[kevzilla]

Made it through to Week 10 of the Subscriber Contest, but Magic 8-Ball says 'not bloody likely' to go any further. Stupid Nick Folk and bye weeks.

I sailed over the cutline this week. Too bad I went out the week before.

 

[krista4]

Learned today that Sasquatch-lover prepared a "contract" that he gave to my grandpa indicating that as soon as gramps gives him $40K (detective agency buy-ins are getting cheaper), Bigfoot will leave him alone. Trying to obtain a copy of said contract for the amusement of the GMTAN.

Jesus.Maybe he's open to a counter offer? "You can have $500 to go away or you can have nothing."

No need to counter when he's already negotiating against himself.

The sad fact, though, is that my grandpa is going to give him some significant amount of money. Don't know why, don't know what. We keep learning of more and more that gramps has already done, but somehow he feels like he owes it to his dead second wife.

Not any of our business, but would parting with this kind of money hinder or negatively impact your grandfather's ability to live out the rest of his life in financial comfort? Note that I am with everybody here that thinks this guy should get absolutely nothing and like it, but if parting with a chunk of cash has any sort of negative impact on gramp's retirement nest egg, I'll help you kick fat *******'s assssssss.

It does. He's not a rich man by any means. I just don't know what to do about it, though, short of Sacamano's uncle Anthony. We're all frustrated, angry, upset, etc.

I haven't had a grandmother in 23 years. You guys have good genes!

My grandpa is 95 and has three living siblings, two in their 90s and one in her 80s.

Horrible genes on my dad's side of the family, though.

 

[Limp Ditka]

I wonder how much it would take to get my family to just lessen the contact they make with me especially texts.

Take the picture, Tanner

Every day between 9:30-10:00AM my mom texts me and my siblings to let us know she isn't laying on the kitchen floor like in the Life Alert commercials. It's her idea and actually a pretty good one.

Weird. My grandmother was found on the kitchen floor by her caretaker this morning. Diagnosed with pneumonia and will be spending the night in the hospital.

FYI I didn't mean to like this I was quoting above post on mobile

There's actually a good amount of guilt weighing on my conscious right now. Just last night I almost replied to Grove's post regarding not imagining being able to only care about a relative's money, and not the relative themself, with 'You've never met my grandmother'

During those Vodka and cigarettes days, she could be as mean as they come. When I was around 12 she promised me her car when I got my drivers license. About a month before my 16th birthday, she got in a fight with my old man and sold the car just to spite him.

 

[Aaron Rudnicki]

Freaking Londoners get all the good new "restaurants":

For Gary Keery, 33, cereal is not merely breakfast food. “It can be a brunch, lunch, dinner, supper and tea!” said the Belfast-born Londoner, who was inspired by a search for “the milky sugary goodness” one hung-over afternoon with his twin, Alan.

At their all-day Cereal Killer Cafe, which opened last December on a Shoreditch strip of curry houses, leather wholesalers and secondhand shops, a bowl of cereal can also be a trip down memory lane.

In line one Thursday at lunchtime, I was dizzied by the choice of 120 boxed cereals lining the exposed-brick walls, plus 30 types of milk (even bubble gum-flavored) and various “cocktails” (think Marshmallow Mateys, Golden Nuggets and a Twinkie in one bowl, from £4.60, or $6.85 at $1.48 to the pound) — and, perhaps, by the saccharine scent.

My off-menu “Campbell’s Classic” (Waffle Crisp, French Toast Crunch) became soppy with custard milk and crushed Cadbury Flake as I watched fuzzy VHS tapes of “Care Bears” and “Friends” downstairs on side-by-side retro TVs. Cabbage Patch Kids and special-edition WWF cereal sat on vintage kitchen cabinets. A band discussed its gig schedule at the next Formica table, stopping to sing along with Hanson’s “MMMBop.”

I think Chicago had something like this a few years ago.

Glenn's Diner has been serving cereal for many years.

http://www.conciergepreferred.com/media/k2/items/cache/c19b15f2f214db2a095e013acc18f933_XL.jpg

 

[Limp Ditka]

Wonderful

Now I want Glenn's Diner

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Made it through to Week 10 of the Subscriber Contest, but Magic 8-Ball says 'not bloody likely' to go any further. Stupid Nick Folk and bye weeks.

I sailed over the cutline this week. Too bad I went out the week before.

I checked on my team after a couple of weeks and literally couldn't understand what the hell I was thinking when I put that horrible squad together.

 

[General Malaise]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

 

[El Floppo]

I wonder how much it would take to get my family to just lessen the contact they make with me especially texts.

Take the picture, Tanner

Every day between 9:30-10:00AM my mom texts me and my siblings to let us know she isn't laying on the kitchen floor like in the Life Alert commercials. It's her idea and actually a pretty good one.

Weird. My grandmother was found on the kitchen floor by her caretaker this morning. Diagnosed with pneumonia and will be spending the night in the hospital.

gl and healthy recovery, LD grandma.

 

[El Floppo]

and same thought... my mom (80) informed me last time I saw her that she's using a life-alert type of thing when she's home.

she's in amazing shape (yoga daily, running 3x week, hiking 2x week) and still working (teacher and poet)- so I'm beyond happy that she's choosing now to be wary and careful about all the usual "old person" land mines in waiting.

also told me she was putting no-slip edging on the treads of her stairs. considering the amount of times I slipped down those as a kid... yeah- thanks.

 

[Frostillicus]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

duh

 

[Ignoramus]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

Damn, who isn't coming on to GM these days? First the cute brunette wanting to quietly flee the scene of an accident she caused and now a blondie wanting to sell you ####. Next you're going to tell us about the pretty waitress that remembered your drink order!

 

[Limp Ditka]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

Next you're going to tell us about the pretty waitress that remembered your drink order!

I had one of those once

 

[General Malaise]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

duh

HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!

 

[General Malaise]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

Damn, who isn't coming on to GM these days? First the cute brunette wanting to quietly flee the scene of an accident she caused and now a blondie wanting to sell you ####. Next you're going to tell us about the pretty waitress that remembered your drink order!

Buy a lottery ticket?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

If only there was a way for a regular person to be able to enjoy cold breakfast cereals at home without all of the hassle.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

Did you tell her about the time you almost landed a sports radio gig right there in that very restaurant?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Anybody ever try FBG Judge Smails's Froot Loop recipe? Looks complex but I've heard great things.

 

[El Floppo]

Anybody ever try FBG Judge Smails's Froot Loop recipe? Looks complex but I've heard great things.

is there milk?

I hope there's milk.

 

[shuke]

Freaking Londoners get all the good new "restaurants":

For Gary Keery, 33, cereal is not merely breakfast food. “It can be a brunch, lunch, dinner, supper and tea!” said the Belfast-born Londoner, who was inspired by a search for “the milky sugary goodness” one hung-over afternoon with his twin, Alan.

At their all-day Cereal Killer Cafe, which opened last December on a Shoreditch strip of curry houses, leather wholesalers and secondhand shops, a bowl of cereal can also be a trip down memory lane.

In line one Thursday at lunchtime, I was dizzied by the choice of 120 boxed cereals lining the exposed-brick walls, plus 30 types of milk (even bubble gum-flavored) and various “cocktails” (think Marshmallow Mateys, Golden Nuggets and a Twinkie in one bowl, from £4.60, or $6.85 at $1.48 to the pound) — and, perhaps, by the saccharine scent.

My off-menu “Campbell’s Classic” (Waffle Crisp, French Toast Crunch) became soppy with custard milk and crushed Cadbury Flake as I watched fuzzy VHS tapes of “Care Bears” and “Friends” downstairs on side-by-side retro TVs. Cabbage Patch Kids and special-edition WWF cereal sat on vintage kitchen cabinets. A band discussed its gig schedule at the next Formica table, stopping to sing along with Hanson’s “MMMBop.”

I think Chicago had something like this a few years ago.

Glenn's Diner has been serving cereal for many years.

http://www.conciergepreferred.com/media/k2/items/cache/c19b15f2f214db2a095e013acc18f933_XL.jpg

But why would you get cereal if you were at a diner?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Anybody ever try FBG Judge Smails's Froot Loop recipe? Looks complex but I've heard great things.

is there milk?

I hope there's milk.

Yes there is milk involved but until I do some more research (and maybe practice) I'm going to leave the milk part to the experts. Perhaps the Leche Chef at Glenn's has a youtube channel.

 

[Limp Ditka]

Anybody ever try FBG Judge Smails's Froot Loop recipe? Looks complex but I've heard great things.

is there milk?

I hope there's milk.

Yes there is milk involved but until I do some more research (and maybe practice) I'm going to leave the milk part to the experts. Perhaps the Leche Chef at Glenn's has a youtube channel.

He would but he doesn't like cameras

 

[shuke]

Anybody ever try FBG Judge Smails's Froot Loop recipe? Looks complex but I've heard great things.

Is it legendary?

 

[General Malaise]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

Did you tell her about the time you almost landed a sports radio gig right there in that very restaurant?

Saving that for our second date.

 

[General Malaise]

Anybody ever try FBG Judge Smails's Froot Loop recipe? Looks complex but I've heard great things.

Make sure you read Offdee's ***OFFICIAL*** changes to the recipe first. You won't believe step number 6!

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Malbec or Pinot with Trix?

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Last week I stopped off at my local watering hole (BWW to support Tanner's family) before heading downtown for an edumacation event. I was dressed in slacks, nice button down, loafers, which is now about a once-a-month occasion for me. Sucking down a brew, a nice looking, petite blonde grabbed a seat next to me and began conversation, which is even less of a common occurrence for me these days, what with my gingerness and Sumo physique. She ordered some food, begged me to share it with her so she wouldn't "look like a pig" (her words) and talked my ear off. She told me she's been in the media business forever (despite not knowing Bentley) and said she was interested in learning more about hedge funds and marketing and blah blah blah. We exchanged cards, I left after my beer, and that was that.

Today, a week later, she has emailed me asking how she can assist our marketing efforts. She totally wants to bang the albino wino, right?

Damn, who isn't coming on to GM these days? First the cute brunette wanting to quietly flee the scene of an accident she caused and now a blondie wanting to sell you ####. Next you're going to tell us about the pretty waitress that remembered your drink order!

And maybe a car accident.

 

[El Floppo]

Malbec or Pinot with Trix?

red w/ Trix?

amateur.

 

[Ignoramus]

Malbec or Pinot with Trix?

What is this, Spring of 2014???

 

[General Malaise]

Malbec or Pinot with Trix?

red w/ Trix?

amateur.

Gris down?

 

[General Malaise]

Guy's in Scupper's bracket can substitute raisins for plebeian granola.

 

[El Floppo]

Malbec or Pinot with Trix?

red w/ Trix?

amateur.

Gris down?

you too?

wtf.

Trix goes with Rose. ROSE. ####### buncha phillipinasteins.