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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (12 Viewers)
- Thread starter General Malaise
- Start date
Dan Lambskin
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Other good ones
"I was 23 on a trip with my girlfriend in San Francisco. We were both getting ready for the day in the bathroom and I needed my hair gel, so I asked if she could hand me my toilet treat bag. She seemed confused, I again asked, "Can you please hand me my bag of toilet treats!?" She ran out of the bathroom laughing."
"I didn't realize that Mike Meyers plays both Austin Powers and Dr Evil till the third Austin Powers movie came out"
"My dad would tell me bull#### things to mess with me as a kid. Usually he would remember eventually to correct it. Sometimes, however, he forgot.
I went through the first 17 years of my life thinking an artichoke was a nocturnal rodent. Went to Italian restaurant and was horrified to see artichoke hearts on the menu. My girlfriend still gives me #### for it three years later."
"For most of my life I assumed Neil Armstrong was a black man, because I'd never seen Neil outside the space suit, but I had seen Louis Armstrong. It never occurred to me that there would be anything unusual about a black astronaut in the 60s"
"My best friend freshman year asked me how accurately a man had to jizz on a women's breasts to get her pregnant. Boy was that a surprise to him"
"I was 23 on a trip with my girlfriend in San Francisco. We were both getting ready for the day in the bathroom and I needed my hair gel, so I asked if she could hand me my toilet treat bag. She seemed confused, I again asked, "Can you please hand me my bag of toilet treats!?" She ran out of the bathroom laughing."
"I didn't realize that Mike Meyers plays both Austin Powers and Dr Evil till the third Austin Powers movie came out"
"My dad would tell me bull#### things to mess with me as a kid. Usually he would remember eventually to correct it. Sometimes, however, he forgot.
I went through the first 17 years of my life thinking an artichoke was a nocturnal rodent. Went to Italian restaurant and was horrified to see artichoke hearts on the menu. My girlfriend still gives me #### for it three years later."
"For most of my life I assumed Neil Armstrong was a black man, because I'd never seen Neil outside the space suit, but I had seen Louis Armstrong. It never occurred to me that there would be anything unusual about a black astronaut in the 60s"
"My best friend freshman year asked me how accurately a man had to jizz on a women's breasts to get her pregnant. Boy was that a surprise to him"
General Malaise
Footballguy
General Malaise
Footballguy
GroveDiesel
Footballguy
Knew a girl in high school that wrote a report in biology about a dinosaur called the rhinoceros (she thought it was pronounced rhino-saurous). I still have no idea how she managed to write a report on it without realizing it wasn't a dinosaur.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
General Malaise
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
"Until the age of 19 I didn't realize that the handicap symbol was a guy in a wheelchair. I thought it was a character from some Asian language that meant handicapped.
It was a mind#### the first time I realized what it actually was"
"My friend thought Reindeer were just a christmas related mythical animal until he was 18."
"I thought Gene Wilder was Mel Brooks up until a couple of years ago, I am insane."
It was a mind#### the first time I realized what it actually was"
"My friend thought Reindeer were just a christmas related mythical animal until he was 18."
"I thought Gene Wilder was Mel Brooks up until a couple of years ago, I am insane."
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
RedmondLonghorn
Footballguy
One of our friends aksed us to settle an argument he was involved in: "What are penguins?", he asked. We were puzzled, but said something to the effect of "flightless birds" after a second. He got real quiet and then said "Are you sure? I always thought they were like seals."
This is a real life human who has never had a massive head injury and seemingly can function in society.
This is a real life human who has never had a massive head injury and seemingly can function in society.
Aerial Assault
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Dan Lambskin
Footballguy
Same friend...we were Up North one time browsing old pictures at an antique shop or something. Lots of pictures were titled _______ Circa 1926 and the like
He said "man that Circa guy took a ton of pictures"
5-ish Finkle
Footballguy
Krusty: "No. It's a goat. You know, one of them lady goats."
Selma: "A lady goat is a sheep!"
Dr. Hibbert: "I believe she's right."
Otto: "You're all crazy!"
Selma: "A lady goat is a sheep!"
Dr. Hibbert: "I believe she's right."
Otto: "You're all crazy!"
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
GroveDiesel
Footballguy
I wasn't THAT old, but I remember feeling sheepish at one point when I realized that not all cats were female and not all dogs were male.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
RedmondLonghorn
Footballguy
El Floppo
Footballguy
Btw... The wife completely nixed any option of going to her moms house. We've had a few low-level fights about it. She thinks somebody else that's there (4 bothers and two adult grandkids) should step up. Imo, then stepping up is irrelevant to what the right thing for us to do in this situation is. She's not having it. Weird, because were typically eye to eye on "right and wrong". I feel like it's her family, so she gets final say... especially since I've voiced my opinion on it whenever discussed- nothing left unsaid about it, we just disagree.
Captain Quinoa
Footballguy
Last edited by a moderator:
DA RAIDERS
Footballguy
great day!!
picked up my niece and nephew today for a 3 day sleepover. my daughter hasn't seen her cousins in nearly a year. they live in HI.
the 3 of them have have been shrieking with laughter for the last 6 hours. which included my daughter slamming the boy cousins head in the car door. he already has a small shiner. didn't cry, swears he's fine.
bonus: the special needs girl running the counter at chuckie cheese couldn't figure out how to ring up my 2 beers. so i just gave her the money for them. she then showed up at my table with my "change" which was the exact amount i had left with her to pay for the beers
good times. i wish they lived closer
picked up my niece and nephew today for a 3 day sleepover. my daughter hasn't seen her cousins in nearly a year. they live in HI.
the 3 of them have have been shrieking with laughter for the last 6 hours. which included my daughter slamming the boy cousins head in the car door. he already has a small shiner. didn't cry, swears he's fine.
bonus: the special needs girl running the counter at chuckie cheese couldn't figure out how to ring up my 2 beers. so i just gave her the money for them. she then showed up at my table with my "change" which was the exact amount i had left with her to pay for the beers
good times. i wish they lived closer
kevzilla
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Who? Special needs people?great day!!
picked up my niece and nephew today for a 3 day sleepover. my daughter hasn't seen her cousins in nearly a year. they live in HI.
the 3 of them have have been shrieking with laughter for the last 6 hours. which included my daughter slamming the boy cousins head in the car door. he already has a small shiner. didn't cry, swears he's fine.
bonus: the special needs girl running the counter at chuckie cheese couldn't figure out how to ring up my 2 beers. so i just gave her the money for them. she then showed up at my table with my "change" which was the exact amount i had left with her to pay for the beers
good times. i wish they lived closer
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Recently started checking out Reddit. Pretty good stuff.
RedmondLonghorn
Footballguy
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Dan Lambskin
Footballguy
Frostillicus
Footballguy
And it's so big! Starting to figure out how to narrow things down and what not.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Yeah, go to "edit" in the upper right. Start unsubscribing from crap you don't want to see. If you get bored click "random" you might find some cool subs.
Last edited by a moderator:
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
When you first sign up you are automatically subscribed to a bunch of subreddits: pics, funny, news, videos, etc. if you don't want to see posts from those subs you have to unsubscribe. You can subscribe to just about anything.
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Is that how the front page works? It just shows whatever you subscribe to? Sorry.
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Homer J Simpson
I don't push
Officer Pete Malloy said:I performed an outdoor wedding yesterday at 5pm. It was about 105F. It had rained for about 10 seconds an hour before. The heat and humidity was brutal. The groom was a chubby, little ginger. He was sweating like HJS at Build-a-Bear.St. Louis Bob said:oolEverything was flooding here which is kind of crazy since we live on high ground now.Officer Pete Malloy said:You guys ok?St. Louis Bob said:Aaron Rudnicki said:
I think it has rained 16 out of the last 20 days here. #### this noise.
UOFI_316
Footballguy
5-ish Finkle
Footballguy
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Does reddit tell you if anybody replies or upvotes or whatever?
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Yeah, if there is a reply you will see that the little envelope icon turns red.You can check for up votes by clicking your name
