GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (23 Viewers)

[Limp Ditka]

grateful zed is the new roarin sonorin

Blasphemy

 

[Aaron Rudnicki]

grateful zed is the new roarin sonorin

except he's not new. been around and unfunny since before anyone knew who roarin was probably.

 

[mr roboto]

I can't tell anyone IRL for another 6 weeks but mrs roboto is pregnant. We've been kinda trying for a couple years. It will be #3 (and hopefully not #4+).

Don't tell our parents or I'll have to kill all you anonymous internet acquaintances.

 

[Aerial Assault]

Congrats!

 

[Frostillicus]

I can't tell anyone IRL for another 6 weeks but mrs roboto is pregnant. We've been kinda trying for a couple years. It will be #3 (and hopefully not #4+).

Don't tell our parents or I'll have to kill all you anonymous internet acquaintances.

Way to stick it in there!

 

[mr roboto]

I can't tell anyone IRL for another 6 weeks but mrs roboto is pregnant. We've been kinda trying for a couple years. It will be #3 (and hopefully not #4+).

Don't tell our parents or I'll have to kill all you anonymous internet acquaintances.

Way to stick it in there!

 

[Ignoramus]

I can't tell anyone IRL for another 6 weeks but mrs roboto is pregnant. We've been kinda trying for a couple years. It will be #3 (and hopefully not #4+).

Don't tell our parents or I'll have to kill all you anonymous internet acquaintances.

Good job ####### your wife, GB!

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

grateful zed is the new roarin sonorin

except he's not new. been around and unfunny since before anyone knew who roarin was probably.

And how

 

[Mr. Pickles]

My Pandora Wilco station may be on of my top 5 favorite things in the world. Radiohead, Fleet Foxes, Sun Kil Moon, Band of Horses, MMJ, Golden Smog, etc.

My Band of Horses Pandora station is my go-to.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I can't tell anyone IRL for another 6 weeks but mrs roboto is pregnant. We've been kinda trying for a couple years. It will be #3 (and hopefully not #4+).

Don't tell our parents or I'll have to kill all you anonymous internet acquaintances.

Congrats YPDSOB

 

[tommyboy]

Might as well have 4, youre ####ed

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Thought of both, but I'd have to go downstairs and unlock the door. WHY DO I NOT GIVE MY KEY TO HOOKERS!?!?

LOOK AT ME! I HAVE AN UPSTAIRS!

Or a second floor apartment above a negro hair salon.

Me and Stiggs were wearing gold-and-azure-flecked Lurex tuxedos from Dee's Tuxtique --- a 100 percent Negro operation, limited exclusively to colors, substances, and textures alluring to Negroes only.

Because there was a filthy ethnic barbershop next to the tux place, and because this shop had 1950s magazine photos of hairstylings from the East Coast gene axis of dark, bony-foreheaded Italo-Hispanic proto-men with total petroleum bonded, boxlike formations of viscid black hair, we decided to step in for a so-called modified bop, which harmonized well with the tuxedos...

 

[Binky The Doormat]

I want food but don't want to stand up.

Any ideas?

I've eaten a dozen tamales since 7:00PM

They were well worth standing up for.

Your new Delta Tau name is now "Puffy."

 

[Limp Ditka]

I want food but don't want to stand up.

Any ideas?

I've eaten a dozen tamales since 7:00PMThey were well worth standing up for.

Your new Delta Tau name is now "Puffy."

Si

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Nobody uses Pandora anymore, noobs.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Nobody uses Pandora anymore, noobs.

I didn't even know it was still around. Thought it went out like Betamax.

 

[shuke]

According to Forbes, what is the least popular candy handed out at Halloween?

Payday

Actually true.

Total bull####

 

[shuke]

Maybe if the dickfaces at Hertz @Logan get their gdmfshhit together

I know exactly what you mean by this based on my last experience there.

Hertz sucks everywhere

I like Hertz. I have the Hertz Gold Plus so maybe that helps things but I've never had a hiccup using them.Whom do you like better?

National

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Maybe if the dickfaces at Hertz @Logan get their gdmfshhit together

I know exactly what you mean by this based on my last experience there.

Hertz sucks everywhere

I like Hertz. I have the Hertz Gold Plus so maybe that helps things but I've never had a hiccup using them.Whom do you like better?

National

That new outfit, Colonial, isn't bad.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

According to Forbes, what is the least popular candy handed out at Halloween?

Payday

Actually true.

Total bull####

Really, give them to me. Love them.

Worse than Payday: virtually all other common Halloween candy that isn't

- Baby Ruth

- Butterfinger

- Twix

- Mounds

- Almond Joy

- Reeses

- Starburst/Skittles

- Snickers

- Dark Choc Hersheys

- Midnight Milky Way

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Worst Halloween candy: http://www.bonbonisland.com/catalog/images/DumDumsLollipops.jpg

Might as well just spit on the kids that show up to your door, Cheapskate.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Circus peanuts are pretty terrible, guys.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Worst Halloween candy: http://www.bonbonisland.com/catalog/images/DumDumsLollipops.jpg

Might as well just spit on the kids that show up to your door, Cheapskate.

Same for jolly rancher - ANY hard candy. Cheap and horrible. Why not a homemade popcorn ball or a candy apple with a razor in it!! ####ers ...

 

[shuke]

Double relevant. Indians sh it everywhere and surprisingly enough, it isn't a good idea

A coworker from India once explained to me why they usually eat with their left hands. This picture confirms it.

 

[Aerial Assault]

In one corner . . . a discussion of the merits of various Halloween candy

And iiiiiiiiiiiiiin the other corner . . . a simultaneous discussion of institutionalized pooping

Appetite gone.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Circus peanuts are pretty terrible, guys.

Pretty? They're Satan's Boogers

 

[tommyboy]

Who gives peanuts anymore? This is a nut free zone, people.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Who gives peanuts anymore? This is a nut free zone, people.

Oh come on!!!!

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

So this is hilarious...

My former Super Nintendo has adult sons who were stud athletes. One of them was named head football coach at his alma mater here in town. We'll call him Joe. Joe could have been drafted by the MLB decided to parlay his studliness into a football scholarship at a lower level D1 school because he said "baseball is a bunch of standing around" or something like that.

Anyway. He's a great coach but inherited a crap team. Seems that a lot of his players expect playing time and/or starting positions because the youth feeder program inflated their (and their parents egos).

So last week he was suspended. Like out of the blue. Of course the HS an HS district can't comment on the specifics. He was reinstated today.

I tapped into my network of connections tonight. Here's what happened:

His team is rather weak. He's busting his ### to create a winning program but he just doesn't have the horses. And factor in he has a lot of pre-madonnas (k4).

Apparently he wrote on the small whiteboard behind his desk a reminder to "talk to certain ####tard* parents".

* sounds like "duck bard"

And some commie terrorist saw it and reported it.

 

[Limp Ditka]

Does this mean he won't get his summers off?

 

[tommyboy]

Hey mr wilson, your son sucks, ok good talk.

 

[Doctor Detroit]

It's not as funny as "All the Muds" IMO, but it'll do.

 

[bud29]

According to Forbes, what is the least popular candy handed out at Halloween?

Payday

Actually true.

Total bull####

Really, give them to me. Love them.

Worse than Payday: virtually all other common Halloween candy that isn't

- Baby Ruth

- Butterfinger

- Twix

- Mounds

- Almond Joy

- Reeses

- Starburst/Skittles

- Snickers

- Dark Choc Hersheys

- Midnight Milky Way

Add Whoppers and that's a pretty solid list.

 

[krista4]

I remember that time before Madonna.

 

[Doctor Detroit]

I remember that time before Madonna.

Madonna ruined Halloween?

 

[Doctor Detroit]

Also Paydays are categorically horrendous. I'd like to see an eating contest between Shuke and Tre of Paydays and MRE crackers.

I would actually buy that pay-per-view.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Also Paydays are categorically horrendous. I'd like to see an eating contest between Shuke and Tre of Paydays and MRE crackers.

I would actually buy that pay-per-view.

3 lies for the price of one?

 

[Doctor Detroit]

Also Paydays are categorically horrendous. I'd like to see an eating contest between Shuke and Tre of Paydays and MRE crackers.

I would actually buy that pay-per-view.

3 lies for the price of one?

Set it up, you got my $59.95.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Does this mean he won't get his summers off?

Suspension lifted, Captain RIF

 

[krista4]

Soap Fusion sounds like a pretty good* jam band.

*All jam bands suck.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Sleep with his wife

 

[El Floppo]

sometimes this kind of thing happens.

 

[Limp Ditka]

sometimes this kind of thing happens.

Seems Floridaish

 

[Dan Lambskin]

sometimes this kind of thing happens.

Damn Jaws from James Bond is looking pretty rough these days

 

[Dan Lambskin]

sometimes this kind of thing happens.

Damn Jaws from James Bond is looking pretty rough these days

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Commander Stevens' jib: I like the cut of it.

I hadn't been in there today until a few minutes ago, he does have a valid point. I never understood the ####ters that don't flush.

My buddy works at Intel, which employs a lot of.....non-albino types. The horror stories he tells of the bathrooms are vomit worthy. Culturally speaking, not everybody in this world sits their butt cheeks down on the toilet seat. Some like to squat, hover over it and aim towards the water. They aren't always accurate. He says he's gone home to poop more than once.

I kind of like the imagery of a giant semiconductor Fab, with immaculate white clean rooms for production, and disgusting, filthy bathrooms.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Commander Stevens' jib: I like the cut of it.

I hadn't been in there today until a few minutes ago, he does have a valid point. I never understood the ####ters that don't flush.

My buddy works at Intel, which employs a lot of.....non-albino types. The horror stories he tells of the bathrooms are vomit worthy. Culturally speaking, not everybody in this world sits their butt cheeks down on the toilet seat. Some like to squat, hover over it and aim towards the water. They aren't always accurate. He says he's gone home to poop more than once.

See: EvilGrin's poop in the ceiling story.

As pungent as curry might smell going in, it manifests into something far worse coming out. Though I'm guessing Curry is on your restricted list with 98% of the world's foods.

Well, it has flavor, so...

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Thought of both, but I'd have to go downstairs and unlock the door. WHY DO I NOT GIVE MY KEY TO HOOKERS!?!?

LOOK AT ME! I HAVE AN UPSTAIRS!

Or a second floor apartment above a negro hair salon.

Seriously, you think I'd live somewhere where I have to use stairs all the time? You think I would use stairs to go to bed!?!?

It's like you don't even know me!!!

Technically you do, at least when you sleep in your apartment.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Two of my people were having an affair. They're spinning it as an "emotional affair."

His wife is demanding one of them quit. They've asked for his 401k statement. No idea what's going to happen, but they're my two best employees. I'm only two weeks in, so I have no responsibility for this, and I guess the worse it gets the better I look when we're back to normal.

I can't remember, are you a slaver or a cult leader?

 

[El Floppo]

Thought of both, but I'd have to go downstairs and unlock the door. WHY DO I NOT GIVE MY KEY TO HOOKERS!?!?

LOOK AT ME! I HAVE AN UPSTAIRS!

Or a second floor apartment above a negro hair salon.

Seriously, you think I'd live somewhere where I have to use stairs all the time? You think I would use stairs to go to bed!?!?

It's like you don't even know me!!!

Technically you do, at least when you sleep in your apartment.

pretty sure it's on your apartment.