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GM's Thread About Everything/GM's Thread About Nothing (22 Viewers)

Trump: Hey guys, how's that Muslim Band doing?

Staff: Band??? We thought you said Ban!!!

Trump: No way that'd be messed up! Maybe we can have them play at the opening of our new Mexican Mall.

 
@General Malaise

Funny, old, but at least not misogynistic and inclusive.

A man goes to a Psychologist and says, "Doc I got a real problem, I can't stop thinking about sex."

The Psychologist says, "Well let's see what we can find out", and pulls out his ink blots. "What is this a picture of?" he asks.

The man turns the picture upside down then turns it around and states, "That's a man and a woman on a bed making love."

The Psychologist says, "very interesting," and shows the next picture. "And what is this a picture of?"

The man looks and turns it in different directions and says, "That's a man and a woman on a bed making love."

The Psychologists tries again with the third ink blot, and asks the same question, "What is this a picture of?"

The patient again turns it in all directions and replies, "That's a man and a woman on a bed making love."

The Psychologist states, "Well, yes, you do seem to be obsessed with sex."

"Me!?" demands the patient. "You're the one who keeps showing me the dirty pictures!"

 
bostonfred said:
I don't know much about her except shes pretty, in her early 20s and volleyball and went away to collegeva few years ago so this is the best i can fo with so little context.

Her wisdom teeth are coming in and it's crowding her teeth so a formerly smooth surface feels a little sharp when she rubs her tongue over them while she's sleeping.  She probably has a little gum bleeding too which has her thinking about blood.  And she might be a little worried about how it will make her look.

The violence of it is normal and if the person getting shot next to her is a faceless nameless extra then no big deal.  if it's a soecific person or if she had a similar trauma in real life maybe worth looking at but probably nothing.

However it sounds like there's some latent separation anxiety where she still dreams that you're the ones driving her.  She doesn't feel quite autonomous yet.  Someone is driving her.  Her parents, the people around her - there's some normal transition stuff here where she's realizing she isn't a kid anymore and doesn't have her parents to drive her everywhere and the people near her won't always be there with her. 

What she needs is to feel comfortable and independent, not so reliant on her parents and maybe deal with the anonimity of adult interactions.  There are a lot of ways to do this but it is going to be difficult for you because you still want to be there for her. You need to let her be independent too.  If she tried something simple, like sharing a topless photo with an anonymous stranger on the internet who has helped her analyze her recurring nightmares free of charge, it could do a world of good for her. And schedule a ####### trip to the dentist.
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Thanks. Pretty spot on except she's a singer/songwriter, not into volleyball, lives in Nashville. Also she takes great pride in her teeth, no bleeding or gum disease. 

 
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El Floppo said:
you people are weird.

by you people, I mean you people.
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"Let's see, I could remain reasonably dry, OR I could just say "#### it" and show up to work looking like someone who spent one too many nights in the front row of a Gallagher concert.  Hmmmm......tough one.  Okay, I think I'll  go with showing up to work drenched and be super chafed up to my 'nads by 10:30. Cuz, screw umbrellas, man! *Brent Rambo thumbs up*"

 
St. Louis Bob said:
Duh
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:bag:

good lord did I go on a tilt there.

and also completely forgot about the entire thing.

eta: and double bag for using tilt, which I never do, immediately after tommy.

repeated conversations, plagiarizing... maybe I shouldn't use an umbrella after all.

 
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cosjobs said:
Go ahead and book your flight if you want, but seriously wait on the motel. Prices are high now and will go downcloser to the date, No way they will sell out. I'll be htere the whole week and we'll have some fun., Looking forward to it. Only thing I would say, is changing planes is easier than driving through Houston. Try and arrive between 10-2 or after 8 for best traffic. 
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You'd know better than I on this. I just hate changing planes for what would be a 2.5 hour direct flight. Being hard-headed AND lazy is my cross to bear

 
El Floppo said:
:bag:

good lord did I go on a tilt there.

and also completely forgot about the entire thing.

eta: and double bag for using tilt, which I never do, immediately after tommy.

repeated conversations, plagiarizing... maybe I shouldn't use an umbrella after all.
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This is hilarious actually

 
If I'm in line outside for a concert or something...and it's raining....I can definitely see the need for an umbrella.

But if I'm walking 50 feet from my car to the office, an umbrella is just too much hassle. 

 
ok. umbrellas. I get it... you car people drive to the door of your office and to the garage at home and drive through big kahuna burger and everywhere else. carrying around an umbrella to cover the 43" from your car to the next door doesn't make much sense.

we city-folk walk to work, or ride public transportation. walking is involved getting to and from the bus or subway. getting soaked and sitting in your office while soaked isn't... normal... here. we have a very simple method of avoiding this. of the 8million people who live here in NYC, I'd say both of the people who don't have umbrellas are publicly shamed in their jobs as dunk-tank testers.

but mostly I still can't believe I completely forgot about a thread from 2 years ago where I went endlessly on and on about this- even using the same damned shoes line (and btw- I sat for a few seconds trying to think of thing that are useful and omnipresent in our lives but not life-and-death necessary... and shoes is still all I could come up with).

end of umbrella chat. 

...until March, 2017... at which point I will have once again forgotten I ever had this opinion or discussion and will likely use shoes as a unique and hilarious stand-in for umbrellas.

 
when the boss is out and she asks the loud guy to field calls on a project she's working on.... then the loud guy calls a totally unnecessary meeting to "keep (us) all in the loop"... and it's on a conference call with a different office... except three of us are in the same room as him.... and he SHOUTS in to the phone like he's yelling over to people 100 yards away at an active construction site.... punctuated by uproarious, out of control, totally out of context laughter that leads to him almost hyperventilating.

that's the moment when you know you've got to tap out and play hooky for the rest of the day

man, i wish the Gold Mine didn't close. a few hours of arcade games would be great about now.

 
mr. furley said:
when the boss is out and she asks the loud guy to field calls on a project she's working on.... then the loud guy calls a totally unnecessary meeting to "keep (us) all in the loop"... and it's on a conference call with a different office... except three of us are in the same room as him.... and he SHOUTS in to the phone like he's yelling over to people 100 yards away at an active construction site.... punctuated by uproarious, out of control, totally out of context laughter that leads to him almost hyperventilating.

that's the moment when you know you've got to tap out and play hooky for the rest of the day

man, i wish the Gold Mine didn't close. a few hours of arcade games would be great about now.
Click to expand...
please do this.

 
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