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GM's thread about nothing (38 Viewers)

UOFI_316 said:
...

23.01 Oildale Meat Raffle - Doug Baldwin - TE - SEA
23.02 Vag Head Hummus Men - Jonathan Dwyer- RB- PIT
23.03 Drugstore Cowboys - SKIPPED PICK AT WILL
23.04 Es Pipi - Bruce Gradkowski - QB - some team
23.05 Elderly Anoos Aids - SKIPPED PICK AT WILL
23.06 Stinky Fingers - SKIPPED PICK AT WILL
23.07 PowerAids - SKIPPED PICK AT WILL
23.08 Pale Wiffle Condoms - Donald Brown - RB - Ind
23.09 Jr. High Cheerleaders - Jason Cambell Soup - QB - CLE
23.10 Reese's Power - OTC
23.11 Let it Sweat
23.12 Sweatier Vests
23.13 Ice Bags & Nachos
23.14 Amazon Primelvrs
Click to expand...
We'll take TJ Graham, WR, Our Bills

First time I've been in front of a computer all day.

 
flysack said:
Finless said:
Are the Pats for real? And I need a link to :e: Haven't posted there since my roommate and her friend did Shields and Price back in 09-ish. Swear on my mom that happened. She tells me (the walking definition of dumb blonde, good girl though): ZOMG, someone must have been following us all night and saw what was going on and posted about it on some blog!! can you believe that!? Had to contact truck and do some damage control. like when I posted the picks of the chick I was doings new breasts and someone asks: does she have little ____ ____ tattoos on her ____? I never responded, had my ID and the thread immediately deleted. Was so spooked I left town for a week. Small world.
Click to expand...
I hear there's a place over there where you can safely post pics like that, but I wouldn't know because some whiny ##### had me thrown out.

:kicksrock:
Click to expand...
So you got banned for a while? You should probably cry about it, that's what everyone else does.

Oh wait, no they don't.

 
The weirdest memories are popping into my head. Like this poor girl from 8th grade named Sarah Longden and this little limerick someone came up with. Sarah Long-Dong sucks ding-dongs in Hong Kong. She was a nice girl, she didn't deserve that. And this other girl who everyone said had to go to the emergency room to get a frozen hot dog removed from her box. Everyone in the school heard that story and believed it.

Then there was the girl who was dating Mel Hall when he played for the Yankees. Started when she was 14 and it went on for years. He actually took her to the junior prom. Whole town knew about it. He ended up going to prison in TX for statutory rape.

 
McGarnicle said:
The weirdest memories are popping into my head. Like this poor girl from 8th grade named Sarah Longden and this little limerick someone came up with. Sarah Long-Dong sucks ding-dongs in Hong Kong. She was a nice girl, she didn't deserve that. And this other girl who everyone said had to go to the emergency room to get a frozen hot dog removed from her box. Everyone in the school heard that story and believed it.

Then there was the girl who was dating Mel Hall when he played for the Yankees. Started when she was 14 and it went on for years. He actually took her to the junior prom. Whole town knew about it. He ended up going to prison in TX for statutory rape.
Click to expand...
You should probably go to sleep.

 
Homer J Simpson said:
McGarnicle said:
The weirdest memories are popping into my head. Like this poor girl from 8th grade named Sarah Longden and this little limerick someone came up with. Sarah Long-Dong sucks ding-dongs in Hong Kong. She was a nice girl, she didn't deserve that. And this other girl who everyone said had to go to the emergency room to get a frozen hot dog removed from her box. Everyone in the school heard that story and believed it.

Then there was the girl who was dating Mel Hall when he played for the Yankees. Started when she was 14 and it went on for years. He actually took her to the junior prom. Whole town knew about it. He ended up going to prison in TX for statutory rape.
Click to expand...
You should probably go to sleep.
Click to expand...
:lmao:
 
Can we pick? Sweater vests ready. :coffee:

Homer - hang in there...you are right, it is temporary and will get better.

Kev - people who want to be managers are dumb. Making a difference doing the grunt work is where it's at.

Bob's contest is sensational.

 
Homer J Simpson said:
flysack said:
Finless said:
Are the Pats for real? And I need a link to :e: Haven't posted there since my roommate and her friend did Shields and Price back in 09-ish. Swear on my mom that happened. She tells me (the walking definition of dumb blonde, good girl though): ZOMG, someone must have been following us all night and saw what was going on and posted about it on some blog!! can you believe that!? Had to contact truck and do some damage control. like when I posted the picks of the chick I was doings new breasts and someone asks: does she have little ____ ____ tattoos on her ____? I never responded, had my ID and the thread immediately deleted. Was so spooked I left town for a week. Small world.
Click to expand...
I hear there's a place over there where you can safely post pics like that, but I wouldn't know because some whiny ##### had me thrown out.

:kicksrock:
Click to expand...
So you got banned for a while? You should probably cry about it, that's what everyone else does.

Oh wait, no they don't.
Click to expand...
Nope, not banned my friend. I generally laugh about getting banned from e (the log is a riot). I was thrown out of the Video Game Forum where all the cool kids air their dirty secrets for laughs. Apparently a certain whiny d-bag decided a couple hot headed words meant I shouldn't have access anymore. I'm not getting back in and that's fine. I just think it was one of the cheapest, c-nty moves I'd seen in awhile. That's the dig.

Anyhow, moving on.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
flysack said:
Abraham said:
T Bell said:
flysack said:
Decided to spend some of my vacation time on this show people been talking about called Breaking Bad.

Just saw him blow up Tuco's joint. Good stuff.
Click to expand...
Just wait til it get crazy.
Click to expand...
This. You haven't even scratched the surface.
Click to expand...
Season 2 begun. Holy crap Tuco was a crazy mofo. :popcorn:
Click to expand...
Just keep watching. I've never seen a series turn up the tension for as long as this one has without losing me by jumping the shark.

 
Taking my daughter to Indianapolis for a little getaway weekend. She's excited because we're staying a a hotel with a pool. We'll spend countless hours at this place tomorrow. Should be fun!

 
Guster said:
Taking my daughter to Indianapolis for a little getaway weekend. She's excited because we're staying a a hotel with a pool. We'll spend countless hours at this place tomorrow. Should be fun!
Click to expand...
:thumbup:

Also, Zooks, I have some bad news. Mrs. SLB is very disappointed (like wanting to vomit and stuff) about your diseased %^&*@!. She isn't happy that you would be plugging the type of woman that would give this to you. To quote Mrs. SLB "that thing isn't getting anywhere near me". She also said that just because you have it removed, you'll still have the virus forever and will be passing it along. Sorry GB.

 
The only team out of position right now is Stinky Fingers. Zooks, please draft somebody so Thorn can have the rest of the weekend to make up his damned mind, and we can finish this thing up on Monday.

<_<

 
23.01 Oildale Meat Raffle - Doug Baldwin - TE - SEA
23.02 Vag Head Hummus Men - Jonathan Dwyer- RB- PIT
23.03 Drugstore Cowboys - TJ Graham - WR - BUF
23.04 Es Pipi - Bruce Gradkowski - QB - TB
23.05 Elderly Anoos Aids - Drew Stanton - QB - AZ
23.06 Stinky Fingers - SKIPPED PICK AT WILL
23.07 PowerAids - Nick Novak - K - SD
23.08 Pale Wiffle Condoms - Donald Brown - RB - Ind
23.09 Jr. High Cheerleaders - Jason Cambell Soup - QB - CLE
23.10 Reese's Power - OTC
23.11 Let it Sweat
23.12 Sweatier Vests
23.13 Ice Bags & Nachos
23.14 Amazon Primelvrs
 
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.

A little background: I live in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, which is basically the heart of Appalachia. It's not the most diverse area of the country. There's a young woman who works at the local Food Lion who's from Iran. I know this because she has the same name as someone I knew back in MD and I asked. She speaks better English than I do, thought she does have a bit of an accent.

Anyway, I'm in line this morning behind a young guy who's all-too-typical over here. He's buying beer and - I found out later - was already drunk off his ###. For whatever reason, the scanner wouldn't check in his purchase. Before the young lady could punch in the code, he says: "come on you ####### dot head!".

(aside: most of the dialogue I'm gonna relate here is not gonna be exact, but close enough and no embellishments)

For whatever reason besides not having patience with those who hate just because, I decided to chip in my couple of shillings.

"There are so many things wrong with your statement that I don't know where to begin. First, by 'dot head' I'm assuming you mean Arab because there aren't all that many Hindu terrorists flying planes into US buildings. Second, she's not Arab - she's Persian, which means she's Caucasian just like your inbred ###".

(I was getting wound up at this point, but could hear my voice shaking; think I was terrified and righteously angry at the same time)

"Third, she's working and you're not ( I have no idea if he was or not). Fourth, betcha you have an EBT card in your pocket and are leeching off the rest of us".

(I said "EBT" but don't know if that's the right term - Food Stamp Credit Card)

"Lastly (and here's what caused him to swing at me, I think), your eyes are set far enough apart that ignorance is all anyone should ever expect from you. Please don't breed, you #### simple mother####er."

That's when he swung. I'm guessing it was because he was drunk - certainly it wasn't my evasive skills as I didn't/couldn't even move - that he hit the side of my head instead of my face. Next thing I know, I'm on the floor shaking my head and he's held by a couple of guys from kicking me.

Someone helped me up and I started to get really mad. You ever got so mad that phrase "I saw red" makes perfect sense? The only thing I could think was to choke that ####er to death - not to punch him or spit at him, but to get my hands around his throat and kill him. I'm guessing whoever was holding me didn't want that to happen.

I'm a little iffy on the passage of time and some of the events that happened after he hit me, but next thing I recall is talking to a Sherriff's deputy. I declined medical attention, but told him I'd press charges. Turns out the dude had warrants, so I recanted on charges as he's got plenty to answer for. Thinking about it now, I should've piled on but I remember the deputy telling me the guy was in big trouble.

Anyway - home and listening to Kasey's Top 40 from this date in 1976.

How's the draft going?

 
kevzilla said:
The only team out of position right now is Stinky Fingers. Zooks, please draft somebody so Thorn can have the rest of the weekend to make up his damned mind, and we can finish this thing up on Monday.

<_<
Click to expand...
You think maybe we should consider backing up one of our stud QBs? I know the back up to stud Sanchez is gone already, but there's two more studs we could back up.

 
Uruk-Hai said:
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.

A little background: I live in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, which is basically the heart of Appalachia. It's not the most diverse area of the country. There's a young woman who works at the local Food Lion who's from Iran. I know this because she has the same name as someone I knew back in MD and I asked. She speaks better English than I do, thought she does have a bit of an accent.

Anyway, I'm in line this morning behind a young guy who's all-too-typical over here. He's buying beer and - I found out later - was already drunk off his ###. For whatever reason, the scanner wouldn't check in his purchase. Before the young lady could punch in the code, he says: "come on you ####### dot head!".

(aside: most of the dialogue I'm gonna relate here is not gonna be exact, but close enough and no embellishments)

For whatever reason besides not having patience with those who hate just because, I decided to chip in my couple of shillings.

"There are so many things wrong with your statement that I don't know where to begin. First, by 'dot head' I'm assuming you mean Arab because there aren't all that many Hindu terrorists flying planes into US buildings. Second, she's not Arab - she's Persian, which means she's Caucasian just like your inbred ###".

(I was getting wound up at this point, but could hear my voice shaking; think I was terrified and righteously angry at the same time)

"Third, she's working and you're not ( I have no idea if he was or not). Fourth, betcha you have an EBT card in your pocket and are leeching off the rest of us".

(I said "EBT" but don't know if that's the right term - Food Stamp Credit Card)

"Lastly (and here's what caused him to swing at me, I think), your eyes are set far enough apart that ignorance is all anyone should ever expect from you. Please don't breed, you #### simple mother####er."

That's when he swung. I'm guessing it was because he was drunk - certainly it wasn't my evasive skills as I didn't/couldn't even move - that he hit the side of my head instead of my face. Next thing I know, I'm on the floor shaking my head and he's held by a couple of guys from kicking me.

Someone helped me up and I started to get really mad. You ever got so mad that phrase "I saw red" makes perfect sense? The only thing I could think was to choke that ####er to death - not to punch him or spit at him, but to get my hands around his throat and kill him. I'm guessing whoever was holding me didn't want that to happen.

I'm a little iffy on the passage of time and some of the events that happened after he hit me, but next thing I recall is talking to a Sherriff's deputy. I declined medical attention, but told him I'd press charges. Turns out the dude had warrants, so I recanted on charges as he's got plenty to answer for. Thinking about it now, I should've piled on but I remember the deputy telling me the guy was in big trouble.

Anyway - home and listening to Kasey's Top 40 from this date in 1976.

How's the draft going?
Click to expand...
I don't say this lightly. I love you. You are everything that's right in this world.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Uruk-Hai said:
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.

A little background: I live in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, which is basically the heart of Appalachia. It's not the most diverse area of the country. There's a young woman who works at the local Food Lion who's from Iran. I know this because she has the same name as someone I knew back in MD and I asked. She speaks better English than I do, thought she does have a bit of an accent.

Anyway, I'm in line this morning behind a young guy who's all-too-typical over here. He's buying beer and - I found out later - was already drunk off his ###. For whatever reason, the scanner wouldn't check in his purchase. Before the young lady could punch in the code, he says: "come on you ####### dot head!".

(aside: most of the dialogue I'm gonna relate here is not gonna be exact, but close enough and no embellishments)

For whatever reason besides not having patience with those who hate just because, I decided to chip in my couple of shillings.

"There are so many things wrong with your statement that I don't know where to begin. First, by 'dot head' I'm assuming you mean Arab because there aren't all that many Hindu terrorists flying planes into US buildings. Second, she's not Arab - she's Persian, which means she's Caucasian just like your inbred ###".

(I was getting wound up at this point, but could hear my voice shaking; think I was terrified and righteously angry at the same time)

"Third, she's working and you're not ( I have no idea if he was or not). Fourth, betcha you have an EBT card in your pocket and are leeching off the rest of us".

(I said "EBT" but don't know if that's the right term - Food Stamp Credit Card)

"Lastly (and here's what caused him to swing at me, I think), your eyes are set far enough apart that ignorance is all anyone should ever expect from you. Please don't breed, you #### simple mother####er."

That's when he swung. I'm guessing it was because he was drunk - certainly it wasn't my evasive skills as I didn't/couldn't even move - that he hit the side of my head instead of my face. Next thing I know, I'm on the floor shaking my head and he's held by a couple of guys from kicking me.

Someone helped me up and I started to get really mad. You ever got so mad that phrase "I saw red" makes perfect sense? The only thing I could think was to choke that ####er to death - not to punch him or spit at him, but to get my hands around his throat and kill him. I'm guessing whoever was holding me didn't want that to happen.

I'm a little iffy on the passage of time and some of the events that happened after he hit me, but next thing I recall is talking to a Sherriff's deputy. I declined medical attention, but told him I'd press charges. Turns out the dude had warrants, so I recanted on charges as he's got plenty to answer for. Thinking about it now, I should've piled on but I remember the deputy telling me the guy was in big trouble.

Anyway - home and listening to Kasey's Top 40 from this date in 1976.

How's the draft going?
Click to expand...
So persians are caucasions?

Oh and obviously, I love you.

 
General Malaise said:
kevzilla said:
The only team out of position right now is Stinky Fingers. Zooks, please draft somebody so Thorn can have the rest of the weekend to make up his damned mind, and we can finish this thing up on Monday.

<_<
Click to expand...
You think maybe we should consider backing up one of our stud QBs? I know the back up to stud Sanchez is gone already, but there's two more studs we could back up.
Click to expand...
If Cam Newton goes down, we're hosed anyway. I don't think Derek freaking Anderson is gonna move the needle. Similarly, I don't know that Matt Moore would be useful, but he has won some games. I like him better than Anderson.

I think Vince Young is the shark move here. Rodgers has a rookie protecting his blind side. As a Packers fan, I would hate for anything to happen to him, but the Waffle Condos would wind up smelling like a rose. Or something.

 
Uruk-Hai said:
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.
Click to expand...
Damn, glad to hear you're ok and that the redneck is going to have a bad day. :thumbup:

Not that either apply, but I'm shuked on why he went with "dot head" instead of "rag head". One of my buddies is Persian, as is the hottest chick we work with. I'll have to ask them if they've ever been called that. :lol:

 
kevzilla said:
General Malaise said:
kevzilla said:
The only team out of position right now is Stinky Fingers. Zooks, please draft somebody so Thorn can have the rest of the weekend to make up his damned mind, and we can finish this thing up on Monday.

<_<
Click to expand...
You think maybe we should consider backing up one of our stud QBs? I know the back up to stud Sanchez is gone already, but there's two more studs we could back up.
Click to expand...
If Cam Newton goes down, we're hosed anyway. I don't think Derek freaking Anderson is gonna move the needle. Similarly, I don't know that Matt Moore would be useful, but he has won some games. I like him better than Anderson.

I think Vince Young is the shark move here. Rodgers has a rookie protecting his blind side. As a Packers fan, I would hate for anything to happen to him, but the Waffle Condos would wind up smelling like a rose. Or something.
Click to expand...
We should have started "in the open co-owner strategy discussion" shtick several rounds ago. :hifive:

 
Gadzooks said:
Uruk-Hai said:
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.

A little background: I live in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, which is basically the heart of Appalachia. It's not the most diverse area of the country. There's a young woman who works at the local Food Lion who's from Iran. I know this because she has the same name as someone I knew back in MD and I asked. She speaks better English than I do, thought she does have a bit of an accent.

Anyway, I'm in line this morning behind a young guy who's all-too-typical over here. He's buying beer and - I found out later - was already drunk off his ###. For whatever reason, the scanner wouldn't check in his purchase. Before the young lady could punch in the code, he says: "come on you ####### dot head!".

(aside: most of the dialogue I'm gonna relate here is not gonna be exact, but close enough and no embellishments)

For whatever reason besides not having patience with those who hate just because, I decided to chip in my couple of shillings.

"There are so many things wrong with your statement that I don't know where to begin. First, by 'dot head' I'm assuming you mean Arab because there aren't all that many Hindu terrorists flying planes into US buildings. Second, she's not Arab - she's Persian, which means she's Caucasian just like your inbred ###".

(I was getting wound up at this point, but could hear my voice shaking; think I was terrified and righteously angry at the same time)

"Third, she's working and you're not ( I have no idea if he was or not). Fourth, betcha you have an EBT card in your pocket and are leeching off the rest of us".

(I said "EBT" but don't know if that's the right term - Food Stamp Credit Card)

"Lastly (and here's what caused him to swing at me, I think), your eyes are set far enough apart that ignorance is all anyone should ever expect from you. Please don't breed, you #### simple mother####er."

That's when he swung. I'm guessing it was because he was drunk - certainly it wasn't my evasive skills as I didn't/couldn't even move - that he hit the side of my head instead of my face. Next thing I know, I'm on the floor shaking my head and he's held by a couple of guys from kicking me.

Someone helped me up and I started to get really mad. You ever got so mad that phrase "I saw red" makes perfect sense? The only thing I could think was to choke that ####er to death - not to punch him or spit at him, but to get my hands around his throat and kill him. I'm guessing whoever was holding me didn't want that to happen.

I'm a little iffy on the passage of time and some of the events that happened after he hit me, but next thing I recall is talking to a Sherriff's deputy. I declined medical attention, but told him I'd press charges. Turns out the dude had warrants, so I recanted on charges as he's got plenty to answer for. Thinking about it now, I should've piled on but I remember the deputy telling me the guy was in big trouble.

Anyway - home and listening to Kasey's Top 40 from this date in 1976.

How's the draft going?
Click to expand...
So persians are caucasions?

Oh and obviously, I love you.
Click to expand...
They're not? Maybe I'm dumber than he is, but I apparently sold it anyway - enough to get hit, in any case.

 
Disco Stu said:
Uruk-Hai said:
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.
Click to expand...
Damn, glad to hear you're ok and that the redneck is going to have a bad day. :thumbup:

Not that either apply, but I'm shuked on why he went with "dot head" instead of "rag head". One of my buddies is Persian, as is the hottest chick we work with. I'll have to ask them if they've ever been called that. :lol:
Click to expand...
I hear this garbage ("dot head") at work, too - from people I normally respect and who are supposed to be intelligent. I think the internet has made us dumber as we can now go our whole lives only listening to things that reinforce what we think we want to hear.

 
St. Louis Bob said:
Guster said:
Taking my daughter to Indianapolis for a little getaway weekend. She's excited because we're staying a a hotel with a pool. We'll spend countless hours at this place tomorrow. Should be fun!
Click to expand...
:thumbup:

Also, Zooks, I have some bad news. Mrs. SLB is very disappointed (like wanting to vomit and stuff) about your diseased %^&*@!. She isn't happy that you would be plugging the type of woman that would give this to you. To quote Mrs. SLB "that thing isn't getting anywhere near me". She also said that just because you have it removed, you'll still have the virus forever and will be passing it along. Sorry GB.
Click to expand...
DEAR HOT MRS SLB:

The following is from a random medical message board from the internet so it must be true:

"Everybody gets genital HPV (at least 80% of all sexually active people) and most of us probably have several infections during our sexually active years. Having genital HPV should be viewed as a normal and expected fact of human sexuality."

Now Pepper, I hope you re-consider possibly having passionate/awkward sexy times with me after your husband dies in some bazaar manner (I've always felt SLB will die from a squirrel attack while on a nature walk) And if you do re-consider, you might want to prepare for yourself for sex with a man who does not have a penis the size of an elephant's trunk. My motto is "quality not quanity".

Your hopefully future lover,

Gadzooks

ps: I love you SLB

 
General Malaise said:
Uruk-Hai said:
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.

A little background: I live in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, which is basically the heart of Appalachia. It's not the most diverse area of the country. There's a young woman who works at the local Food Lion who's from Iran. I know this because she has the same name as someone I knew back in MD and I asked. She speaks better English than I do, thought she does have a bit of an accent.

Anyway, I'm in line this morning behind a young guy who's all-too-typical over here. He's buying beer and - I found out later - was already drunk off his ###. For whatever reason, the scanner wouldn't check in his purchase. Before the young lady could punch in the code, he says: "come on you ####### dot head!".

(aside: most of the dialogue I'm gonna relate here is not gonna be exact, but close enough and no embellishments)

For whatever reason besides not having patience with those who hate just because, I decided to chip in my couple of shillings.

"There are so many things wrong with your statement that I don't know where to begin. First, by 'dot head' I'm assuming you mean Arab because there aren't all that many Hindu terrorists flying planes into US buildings. Second, she's not Arab - she's Persian, which means she's Caucasian just like your inbred ###".

(I was getting wound up at this point, but could hear my voice shaking; think I was terrified and righteously angry at the same time)

"Third, she's working and you're not ( I have no idea if he was or not). Fourth, betcha you have an EBT card in your pocket and are leeching off the rest of us".

(I said "EBT" but don't know if that's the right term - Food Stamp Credit Card)

"Lastly (and here's what caused him to swing at me, I think), your eyes are set far enough apart that ignorance is all anyone should ever expect from you. Please don't breed, you #### simple mother####er."

That's when he swung. I'm guessing it was because he was drunk - certainly it wasn't my evasive skills as I didn't/couldn't even move - that he hit the side of my head instead of my face. Next thing I know, I'm on the floor shaking my head and he's held by a couple of guys from kicking me.

Someone helped me up and I started to get really mad. You ever got so mad that phrase "I saw red" makes perfect sense? The only thing I could think was to choke that ####er to death - not to punch him or spit at him, but to get my hands around his throat and kill him. I'm guessing whoever was holding me didn't want that to happen.

I'm a little iffy on the passage of time and some of the events that happened after he hit me, but next thing I recall is talking to a Sherriff's deputy. I declined medical attention, but told him I'd press charges. Turns out the dude had warrants, so I recanted on charges as he's got plenty to answer for. Thinking about it now, I should've piled on but I remember the deputy telling me the guy was in big trouble.

Anyway - home and listening to Kasey's Top 40 from this date in 1976.

How's the draft going?
Click to expand...
I don't say this lightly. I love you. You are everything that's right in this world.
Click to expand...
:goodposting:

 
T Bell said:
General Malaise said:
Uruk-Hai said:
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.

A little background: I live in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, which is basically the heart of Appalachia. It's not the most diverse area of the country. There's a young woman who works at the local Food Lion who's from Iran. I know this because she has the same name as someone I knew back in MD and I asked. She speaks better English than I do, thought she does have a bit of an accent.

Anyway, I'm in line this morning behind a young guy who's all-too-typical over here. He's buying beer and - I found out later - was already drunk off his ###. For whatever reason, the scanner wouldn't check in his purchase. Before the young lady could punch in the code, he says: "come on you ####### dot head!".

(aside: most of the dialogue I'm gonna relate here is not gonna be exact, but close enough and no embellishments)

For whatever reason besides not having patience with those who hate just because, I decided to chip in my couple of shillings.

"There are so many things wrong with your statement that I don't know where to begin. First, by 'dot head' I'm assuming you mean Arab because there aren't all that many Hindu terrorists flying planes into US buildings. Second, she's not Arab - she's Persian, which means she's Caucasian just like your inbred ###".

(I was getting wound up at this point, but could hear my voice shaking; think I was terrified and righteously angry at the same time)

"Third, she's working and you're not ( I have no idea if he was or not). Fourth, betcha you have an EBT card in your pocket and are leeching off the rest of us".

(I said "EBT" but don't know if that's the right term - Food Stamp Credit Card)

"Lastly (and here's what caused him to swing at me, I think), your eyes are set far enough apart that ignorance is all anyone should ever expect from you. Please don't breed, you #### simple mother####er."

That's when he swung. I'm guessing it was because he was drunk - certainly it wasn't my evasive skills as I didn't/couldn't even move - that he hit the side of my head instead of my face. Next thing I know, I'm on the floor shaking my head and he's held by a couple of guys from kicking me.

Someone helped me up and I started to get really mad. You ever got so mad that phrase "I saw red" makes perfect sense? The only thing I could think was to choke that ####er to death - not to punch him or spit at him, but to get my hands around his throat and kill him. I'm guessing whoever was holding me didn't want that to happen.

I'm a little iffy on the passage of time and some of the events that happened after he hit me, but next thing I recall is talking to a Sherriff's deputy. I declined medical attention, but told him I'd press charges. Turns out the dude had warrants, so I recanted on charges as he's got plenty to answer for. Thinking about it now, I should've piled on but I remember the deputy telling me the guy was in big trouble.

Anyway - home and listening to Kasey's Top 40 from this date in 1976.

How's the draft going?
Click to expand...
I don't say this lightly. I love you. You are everything that's right in this world.
Click to expand...
:goodposting:
Click to expand...
:goodposting:

Awesome story

 
Uruk-Hai said:
Gadzooks said:
Uruk-Hai said:
Well, I've had an interesting morning. Got punched in the head at the grocery store.

A little background: I live in the Shenandoah Valley of Virginia, which is basically the heart of Appalachia. It's not the most diverse area of the country. There's a young woman who works at the local Food Lion who's from Iran. I know this because she has the same name as someone I knew back in MD and I asked. She speaks better English than I do, thought she does have a bit of an accent.

Anyway, I'm in line this morning behind a young guy who's all-too-typical over here. He's buying beer and - I found out later - was already drunk off his ###. For whatever reason, the scanner wouldn't check in his purchase. Before the young lady could punch in the code, he says: "come on you ####### dot head!".

(aside: most of the dialogue I'm gonna relate here is not gonna be exact, but close enough and no embellishments)

For whatever reason besides not having patience with those who hate just because, I decided to chip in my couple of shillings.

"There are so many things wrong with your statement that I don't know where to begin. First, by 'dot head' I'm assuming you mean Arab because there aren't all that many Hindu terrorists flying planes into US buildings. Second, she's not Arab - she's Persian, which means she's Caucasian just like your inbred ###".

(I was getting wound up at this point, but could hear my voice shaking; think I was terrified and righteously angry at the same time)

"Third, she's working and you're not ( I have no idea if he was or not). Fourth, betcha you have an EBT card in your pocket and are leeching off the rest of us".

(I said "EBT" but don't know if that's the right term - Food Stamp Credit Card)

"Lastly (and here's what caused him to swing at me, I think), your eyes are set far enough apart that ignorance is all anyone should ever expect from you. Please don't breed, you #### simple mother####er."

That's when he swung. I'm guessing it was because he was drunk - certainly it wasn't my evasive skills as I didn't/couldn't even move - that he hit the side of my head instead of my face. Next thing I know, I'm on the floor shaking my head and he's held by a couple of guys from kicking me.

Someone helped me up and I started to get really mad. You ever got so mad that phrase "I saw red" makes perfect sense? The only thing I could think was to choke that ####er to death - not to punch him or spit at him, but to get my hands around his throat and kill him. I'm guessing whoever was holding me didn't want that to happen.

I'm a little iffy on the passage of time and some of the events that happened after he hit me, but next thing I recall is talking to a Sherriff's deputy. I declined medical attention, but told him I'd press charges. Turns out the dude had warrants, so I recanted on charges as he's got plenty to answer for. Thinking about it now, I should've piled on but I remember the deputy telling me the guy was in big trouble.

Anyway - home and listening to Kasey's Top 40 from this date in 1976.

How's the draft going?
Click to expand...
So persians are caucasions?

Oh and obviously, I love you.
Click to expand...
They're not? Maybe I'm dumber than he is, but I apparently sold it anyway - enough to get hit, in any case.
Click to expand...
They are.

 
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