GM's thread about nothing (50 Viewers)

[Notorious T.R.E.]

So if I cut myself 5 1/2 hours ago, and it's still bleeding, I should probably be getting stitches..... amirite?

I've done the ol' heated spoon trick a time or two.

Was thinking super glue

If you're going to ##### out, use duct tape instead of super glue, much easier.

 

[Tiger Fan]

TF - have you tried different services? We didn't go for 15+ years until we went to the modern service at the local methodist church. Coffee and donuts, craft table for the kids, guitar music and a 15 minute p ositive message for a sermon. We actually enoy going now. Ended up becoming members and everything.

No, b/c we really don't care about the religion aspect. We're just wrestling on how we introduce the concept of religion to then, especially. Also (and I should've put this in the original post), since we're Greek Orthodox; a big part of attending the church is interaciton with other Greeks (since it's the only church in the city) and having a sense of "Where you came from" and history and all that stuff. Plus, I feel indebted b/c a lot of my best friends to this day are from "church" growing up...even though 80% of us don't really give a crap about the religious aspect.

Oh. Well that is different. I decided a long time ago that if I didn't want to attend a service, then we just wouldn't go. We tried a bunch of different things before we found a place that worked for us. Our kids also go to preschool there, do Kids Night Out once a month there and we found all our babysitters from the church. Its a whole community thing now.

yeah, half of me thinks I'm blowing it out of proportion....b/c hell, they're young, they don't care...as long as they're having fun, who gives a ####...but then my conscious takes over b/c "how can I put this in front of this stuff that I think is B.S." oh well...I'll figure it out. Grand scheme of things, it's not that big of a deal.

 

[Tiger Fan]

Dear GMTANNERS -

If you want to play in the 2013 NESBITT NFL PLAYOFF FANTASY CHALLENGE, now is the time to let me know. Entry is $25 and I need your email address to pass along the details. Fun for all!

ARE THERE TRANSACTIONS? IF NOT, I'M IN MUTHA ####A!!!!!!!11111111111111111111111111111111JUANJUANJUAN

 

[Limp Ditka]

So if I cut myself 5 1/2 hours ago, and it's still bleeding, I should probably be getting stitches..... amirite?

I've done the ol' heated spoon trick a time or two.

Was thinking super glue

If you're going to ##### out, use duct tape instead of super glue, much easier.

And what parts of the body have you done this heated spoon trick on?

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

So if I cut myself 5 1/2 hours ago, and it's still bleeding, I should probably be getting stitches..... amirite?

I've done the ol' heated spoon trick a time or two.

Was thinking super glue

If you're going to ##### out, use duct tape instead of super glue, much easier.

And what parts of the body have you done this heated spoon trick on?

Foot and collarbone area.

 

[mr roboto]

Why did the French plant trees along the Champs Élysées?

So the Germans could march in the shade.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Oh Abe..

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

So I don't watch a ton of college football....

But are Lou Holtz and Mark May usually this freaking terrible? For every 2.5 football-related points they have to make 1 joke regarding Holtz. It's like clockwork.

 

[Guster]

Polish Mistakes

In Cincinnati we call those Hanky Panks

 

[shuke]

So if I cut myself 5 1/2 hours ago, and it's still bleeding, I should probably be getting stitches..... amirite?

I've done the ol' heated spoon trick a time or two.

To cauterize a wound? Oh bull####.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Polish Mistakes

In Cincinnati we call those Hanky Panks

Do they serve it over spaghetti?

 

[Tiger Fan]

I have a funeral to go to tomorrow. Should I take a dump in the casket?

/Abe

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

So if I cut myself 5 1/2 hours ago, and it's still bleeding, I should probably be getting stitches..... amirite?

I've done the ol' heated spoon trick a time or two.

To cauterize a wound? Oh bull####.

Works great if you have a bleeder.

 

[shuke]

TF - have you tried different services? We didn't go for 15+ years until we went to the modern service at the local methodist church. Coffee and donuts, craft table for the kids, guitar music and a 15 minute p ositive message for a sermon. We actually enoy going now. Ended up becoming members and everything.

No, b/c we really don't care about the religion aspect. We're just wrestling on how we introduce the concept of religion to then, especially. Also (and I should've put this in the original post), since we're Greek Orthodox; a big part of attending the church is interaciton with other Greeks (since it's the only church in the city) and having a sense of "Where you came from" and history and all that stuff. Plus, I feel indebted b/c a lot of my best friends to this day are from "church" growing up...even though 80% of us don't really give a crap about the religious aspect.

Oh. Well that is different. I decided a long time ago that if I didn't want to attend a service, then we just wouldn't go. We tried a bunch of different things before we found a place that worked for us. Our kids also go to preschool there, do Kids Night Out once a month there and we found all our babysitters from the church. Its a whole community thing now.

yeah, half of me thinks I'm blowing it out of proportion....b/c hell, they're young, they don't care...as long as they're having fun, who gives a ####...but then my conscious takes over b/c "how can I put this in front of this stuff that I think is B.S." oh well...I'll figure it out. Grand scheme of things, it's not that big of a deal.

Why do you need to go to church if you don't believe in it?

 

[Limp Ditka]

Polish Mistakes

In Cincinnati we call those Hanky Panks

Do they serve it over spaghetti?

With a dash of cinnamon

 

[Guster]

Ate my mom's meatloaf tonight. Twas a mistake.

I hope to god this isn't a euphemism.

 

[Tiger Fan]

TF - have you tried different services? We didn't go for 15+ years until we went to the modern service at the local methodist church. Coffee and donuts, craft table for the kids, guitar music and a 15 minute p ositive message for a sermon. We actually enoy going now. Ended up becoming members and everything.

No, b/c we really don't care about the religion aspect. We're just wrestling on how we introduce the concept of religion to then, especially. Also (and I should've put this in the original post), since we're Greek Orthodox; a big part of attending the church is interaciton with other Greeks (since it's the only church in the city) and having a sense of "Where you came from" and history and all that stuff. Plus, I feel indebted b/c a lot of my best friends to this day are from "church" growing up...even though 80% of us don't really give a crap about the religious aspect.

Oh. Well that is different. I decided a long time ago that if I didn't want to attend a service, then we just wouldn't go. We tried a bunch of different things before we found a place that worked for us. Our kids also go to preschool there, do Kids Night Out once a month there and we found all our babysitters from the church. Its a whole community thing now.

yeah, half of me thinks I'm blowing it out of proportion....b/c hell, they're young, they don't care...as long as they're having fun, who gives a ####...but then my conscious takes over b/c "how can I put this in front of this stuff that I think is B.S." oh well...I'll figure it out. Grand scheme of things, it's not that big of a deal.

Why do you need to go to church if you don't believe in it?

did you read my original post? Not the one on this chain....the first one that kicked off this convo

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Polish Mistakes

In Cincinnati we call those Hanky Panks

Do they serve it over spaghetti?

With a dash of cinnamon

Next to a river on fire. Wait...

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

ALL GREEKS ATTEND CHURCH

 

[Tiger Fan]

ALL GREEKS ATTEND CHURCH

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

ALL GREEKS ATTEND CHURCH

If only Jesus would save them from their crippling debt, amirite?

 

[shuke]

did you read my original post? Not the one on this chain....the first one that kicked off this convo

Maybe?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

So this surveyor is doing some work in BFE Minnesota. He realizes that somebody made a mistake when it came to the state-line many years ago. He goes to the nearest farmhouse and gives the farmer the news.

"It turns out that your house and your land really aren't in Minnesota. They're in Wisconsin."

The farmer replies "We'll that's good news."

The surveyor asks him "How's that?"

"Well I was just telling the wife the other day that I wasn't sure if I could stand another Minnesota winter."

 

[Tiger Fan]

So a bunch of the wives in our group of friends went out on the town tonight (yeah Monday nights!!!!) 3 of the guys and their kids came over to have a few beers, eat some food and watch our kids terrorize my house tonight. We started talking about which wife would come home the drunkest tonight (mom's of multiple kids deserve to let it loose once a year, right?), and one of my buddies says, "I hope [insert wife's name] wakes me up for sex tonight". I respond, "#### that...my sleep is more valuable than sex".

If I'm awake when she gets home, it's a different story...but to be woken up for sex? I'm not 18 anymore. I'd rather sleep. Am I GAY?

Thoughts?

 

[Guster]

So this surveyor is doing some work in BFE Minnesota. He realizes that somebody made a mistake when it came to the state-line many years ago. He goes to the nearest farmhouse and gives the farmer the news.

"It turns out that your house and your land really aren't in Minnesota. They're in Wisconsin."

The farmer replies "We'll that's good news."

The surveyor asks him "How's that?"

"Well I was just telling the wife the other day that I wasn't sure if I could stand another Minnesota winter."

/bobjoke

 

[Guster]

So a bunch of the wives in our group of friends went out on the town tonight (yeah Monday nights!!!!) 3 of the guys and their kids came over to have a few beers, eat some food and watch our kids terrorize my house tonight. We started talking about which wife would come home the drunkest tonight (mom's of multiple kids deserve to let it loose once a year, right?), and one of my buddies says, "I hope [insert wife's name] wakes me up for sex tonight". I respond, "#### that...my sleep is more valuable than sex".

If I'm awake when she gets home, it's a different story...but to be woken up for sex? I'm not 18 anymore. I'd rather sleep. Am I GAY?

Thoughts?

Your dad took baths with you til you were HOW old??

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

So a bunch of the wives in our group of friends went out on the town tonight (yeah Monday nights!!!!) 3 of the guys and their kids came over to have a few beers, eat some food and watch our kids terrorize my house tonight. We started talking about which wife would come home the drunkest tonight (mom's of multiple kids deserve to let it loose once a year, right?), and one of my buddies says, "I hope [insert wife's name] wakes me up for sex tonight". I respond, "#### that...my sleep is more valuable than sex".

Thoughts?

"Lone Star" is a really underrated film.

 

[Tiger Fan]

So a bunch of the wives in our group of friends went out on the town tonight (yeah Monday nights!!!!) 3 of the guys and their kids came over to have a few beers, eat some food and watch our kids terrorize my house tonight. We started talking about which wife would come home the drunkest tonight (mom's of multiple kids deserve to let it loose once a year, right?), and one of my buddies says, "I hope [insert wife's name] wakes me up for sex tonight". I respond, "#### that...my sleep is more valuable than sex".

If I'm awake when she gets home, it's a different story...but to be woken up for sex? I'm not 18 anymore. I'd rather sleep. Am I GAY?

Thoughts?

Your dad took baths with you til you were HOW old??

 

[UniAlias]

So this surveyor is doing some work in BFE Minnesota. He realizes that somebody made a mistake when it came to the state-line many years ago. He goes to the nearest farmhouse and gives the farmer the news.

"It turns out that your house and your land really aren't in Minnesota. They're in Wisconsin."

The farmer replies "We'll that's good news."

The surveyor asks him "How's that?"

"Well I was just telling the wife the other day that I wasn't sure if I could stand another Minnesota winter."

/bobjoke

 

[Limp Ditka]

So a bunch of the wives in our group of friends went out on the town tonight (yeah Monday nights!!!!) 3 of the guys and their kids came over to have a few beers, eat some food and watch our kids terrorize my house tonight. We started talking about which wife would come home the drunkest tonight (mom's of multiple kids deserve to let it loose once a year, right?), and one of my buddies says, "I hope [insert wife's name] wakes me up for sex tonight". I respond, "#### that...my sleep is more valuable than sex".

If I'm awake when she gets home, it's a different story...but to be woken up for sex? I'm not 18 anymore. I'd rather sleep. Am I GAY?

Thoughts?

Your dad took baths with you til you were HOW old??

 

[Limp Ditka]

Polish Mistakes

In Cincinnati we call those Hanky Panks

Do they serve it over spaghetti?

Is cinnamon the secret ingredient?

 

[cosjobs]

ALL GREEKS ATTEND CHURCH

or own restaurants

 

[cosjobs]

FYI If you go to smoke a roach out the back door of the Royal Sonesta after midnight, the door automatically locks and you have to walk half a mile around the longass block in 21 degrees to get back in.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

THis is seriously the funniest thing I've seen in a long time.

Actual pornhub comments placed in stock photos. I'm dying over here.

(photos are SFW but the text obviously isn't)

 

[cosjobs]

Also, I strangely hungry right now

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

I could use 21 degrees about now.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

I could use 21 degrees about now.

62 here tomorrow.

 

[UniAlias]

THis is seriously the funniest thing I've seen in a long time.

Actual pornhub comments placed in stock photos. I'm dying over here.

(photos are SFW but the text obviously isn't)

Christo!

 

[cosjobs]

I could use 21 degrees about now.

degrees <> inches

 

[Limp Ditka]

THis is seriously the funniest thing I've seen in a long time.

Actual pornhub comments placed in stock photos. I'm dying over here.

(photos are SFW but the text obviously isn't)

Christo!

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

I could use 21 degrees about now.

degrees <> inches

Thank you?

 

[DA RAIDERS]

So if I cut myself 5 1/2 hours ago, and it's still bleeding, I should probably be getting stitches..... amirite?

I've done the ol' heated spoon trick a time or two.

superglue

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

So if I cut myself 5 1/2 hours ago, and it's still bleeding, I should probably be getting stitches..... amirite?

I've done the ol' heated spoon trick a time or two.

superglue

Heated superglue FTW.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

You put a spoon that you've heated with a lighter for a about a minute on your skin and you're good to go. That's just a fact.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

You put a spoon that you've heated with a lighter for a about a minute on your skin and you're good to go. That's just a fact.

Just like I do when I'm cooking up some H?

 

[Tiger Fan]

Just texted the wife: "Am I getting a HJ when you come home? Need to know whether or not to stay up"

 

[Homer J Simpson]

You put a spoon that you've heated with a lighter for a about a minute on your skin and you're good to go. That's just a fact.

Ok Rambo.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Greek handjob is like putting your hand in the country crock, right?

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

You put a spoon that you've heated with a lighter for a about a minute on your skin and you're good to go. That's just a fact.

Ok Rambo.

If it ever happens again, I'll video it. No that big of a deal.

 

[Tiger Fan]

Greek handjob is like putting your hand in the country crock, right?

what means this?