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GM's thread about nothing (43 Viewers)
- Thread starter General Malaise
- Start date
Idiot Boxer
Footballguy
And then they become teens.Yeah, but kids are like reverse kittens. When you get a kitten they start out so cute and everything they do is fun but then they turn into cats and make noises and ruin all your nice things and stink and don't acknowledge your presence. When you have a baby, they don't acknowledge your presence, they ruin all your nice things, they stink, and they make noises, but then they turn cute and everything they do is fun. At least babies are only cats for a little while before they become kittens.this being my second go-round, and having talked to other guys with kids, there's one thing of which i am certain.. no matter what... never ever ever ever tell your wife that you are exhausted during the first 2-3 months after she has had a baby.you worked 10 hours today? so ####ing what. she took care of the baby all day.you stayed up with the baby until midnight, got up at 3 and 5:30, then went to work for 10 hours? so ####ing what. she took care of the baby all day.you stayed up with the baby until midnight, got up at 3 and 5:30, then went to work for 10 hours, then came home to make dinner, do the dishes and shovel 10" of snow? so ####ing what. she took care of the baby all day.we get that taking care of the baby all day is hard work, really we do.... so when we fall asleep on the couch at 3 on a sunday because we are running on 3 hours of sleep a night for 3 weeks running, please don't get upset with us and tell us we don't know what it's like to be tired... just let us nap for 45 minutes or an hour. trust us, when we fall asleep involuntarily it's not a slap in your face of the faces of women who for thousands of years have taken care of babies all by themselves.. and we're certainly not mocking you by collapsing between the toilet and the bathroom sink... it's just that our brain has blacked out, like when you drank that half-liter of vodka in 20 minutes at our friends house 15 years ago. when the baby shrieks in about 30 minutes, and the 2 year old steps on our nuts, elbows our throat and knees our forehead again to play "climb the mountain" we'll wake up and make sure to get right on top of those dishes, and dinner, and diapers, and yes.. you can take an hour shower and 3 hour nap because we don't know what it's really like to be tired. we're just ####ing ###holes.fred> gllllllllll
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
:fail:Taking care of a baby is easy. Even toddlers are easy until they stop taking a nap in the afternoon, then it's game on.ETA
And Furley, why are you getting up with the baby? Man up already.
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Thorn
Footballguy
After Christmas but before New Year's. Christmas is a family homey holiday, so talking to everyone about why your SO isn't around would suck. New Year's is a drinkin, datin, night on the town holiday. She can go out with her single friends and have a good time. And probably find someone new to sleep with.I have a friend who wants to break up with his live in GF. He would be the one moving out in this scenario. He wants to know when is a good time to tell the GF being that it's the holiday season and all. Should he do it now before Christmast? Between Christmas and NYE? Right after New Years?Also, assume that they aren't giving each other Christmas gifts so don't let that factor into your suggestion. I think he also said that her birthday is in February sometime too so I assume he'll definitely want to get out before then.
mr. furley
Footballguy
desert rose
Footballguy
So what do you want Exit 1 to tell him? I'd go with this evening myself, since there are no Christmas gifts to factor in.Wait a minute. My birthday is in February.I have a friend who wants to break up with his live in GF. He would be the one moving out in this scenario. He wants to know when is a good time to tell the GF being that it's the holiday season and all. Should he do it now before Christmast? Between Christmas and NYE? Right after New Years?
Also, assume that they aren't giving each other Christmas gifts so don't let that factor into your suggestion. I think he also said that her birthday is in February sometime too so I assume he'll definitely want to get out before then.
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
Did you go to the baby showers too?
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
I know who she is but never really listened to her. She is pretty good looking. I heard her on The Dave Glover Show and she sounds like a perv. Which is always a plus.
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mr. furley
Footballguy
just to meet her friendsDid you go to the baby showers too?
Orange&Blue
Footballguy
after the new year is over...sometimes the new year sex can be interesting.I have a friend who wants to break up with his live in GF. He would be the one moving out in this scenario. He wants to know when is a good time to tell the GF being that it's the holiday season and all. Should he do it now before Christmast? Between Christmas and NYE? Right after New Years?Also, assume that they aren't giving each other Christmas gifts so don't let that factor into your suggestion. I think he also said that her birthday is in February sometime too so I assume he'll definitely want to get out before then.
Orange&Blue
Footballguy
seriously?Who cares...he is dumping her.After Christmas but before New Year's. Christmas is a family homey holiday, so talking to everyone about why your SO isn't around would suck. New Year's is a drinkin, datin, night on the town holiday. She can go out with her single friends and have a good time. And probably find someone new to sleep with.I have a friend who wants to break up with his live in GF. He would be the one moving out in this scenario. He wants to know when is a good time to tell the GF being that it's the holiday season and all. Should he do it now before Christmast? Between Christmas and NYE? Right after New Years?Also, assume that they aren't giving each other Christmas gifts so don't let that factor into your suggestion. I think he also said that her birthday is in February sometime too so I assume he'll definitely want to get out before then.
Please See Mine
Footballguy
Pretty sure that she was on Real Time a couple months ago and did not seem particularly informed about anything. Just a bunch of Tea Party rhetoric without any facts or actual proposals.
My notebook says that he dodged the question a week or two ago.commisholio said:Notebook says you got divorced a couple of years ago. When did this happenClown-blocked.
Wife wants to watch Friday Night Lights instead.
desert rose
Footballguy
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commisholio
Come out with your pants down!
You need a better notebook.proninja is already married again?
d) Rover gave away his account to someone else whose wife likes to watch Friday Night Lights.
bump
urbanhack
Fight The Power!
Why wouldn't they have changed the user name? Seems weird to keep his name.
jplvr
Footballguy
Whole lotta truth in here, but this thread did bring me back.
Yes Woz, this is definitely about you.Wait a minute. My birthday is in February.I have a friend who wants to break up with his live in GF. He would be the one moving out in this scenario. He wants to know when is a good time to tell the GF being that it's the holiday season and all. Should he do it now before Christmast? Between Christmas and NYE? Right after New Years?
Also, assume that they aren't giving each other Christmas gifts so don't let that factor into your suggestion. I think he also said that her birthday is in February sometime too so I assume he'll definitely want to get out before then.
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
lolI don't get to listen a lot but it's I think it can be best described as radio show if it were run by :e: & timscochet.RudiStein said:
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
Orange&Blue
Footballguy
So who is "the rover"
-fish-
Footballguy
this is not a productive conversation, and will just result in a longstanding username with no history of timeouts or bannings getting banned.
commisholio
Come out with your pants down!
yep, can we please have some self-pruning up in here. I apologize for my part in getting the ball rolling.
urbanhack
Fight The Power!
that's fine. just tell us who took over the account.
mr. furley
Footballguy
not sure why but i felt like listening to
just now. honest, heart-rending, horribly sad but brilliant.annnnnnnnd now i feel like plunging off a bridge
just now. honest, heart-rending, horribly sad but brilliant.annnnnnnnd now i feel like plunging off a bridge
urbanhack
Fight The Power!
Don't do it! We have so much yet to do on our bucket list.
mr. furley
Footballguy
followed it up with
and now i remembered why i don't really listen to rock musicyou white people are depressing
and now i remembered why i don't really listen to rock musicyou white people are depressing
AhrnCityPahnder
Yinz-o-riffic
mr. furley
Footballguy
are you thinking what i'm thinking?
AhrnCityPahnder
Yinz-o-riffic
urbanhack
Fight The Power!
does it involve coming to chicago and kidnapping saintfool?
General Malaise
Footballguy
Wat?Got some pretty sweet club section seats to the saints game for free yesterday ($330 face value) and there was some chick playing words with friends on here ipad (not iphone) the entire game.
MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!Mrs. FDAS, "What the #### is this? Do you want to explain this?"PM sent.MUST BE ADDRESSED EXACTLY AS THE PM. mostly this will piss the wife off, and she'll call me a #######.Hi everyone.Just wanted to let you all know I'm drinking
Got some pretty sweet club section seats to the saints game for free yesterday ($330 face value) and there was some chick playing words with friends on here ipad (not iphone) the entire game.Wat?Got some pretty sweet club section seats to the saints game for free yesterday ($330 face value) and there was some chick playing words with friends on here ipad (not iphone) the entire game.
General Malaise
Footballguy
So on Saturday night, I bought 17 tickets to the Portland Winterhawks (minor league hockey) game as it was their annual "
It's a fun event and the kids really get into it, so I got a big group together and away we went. Earlier in the day, the boys and I counted up all our change, rolled it and turned it into the bank for a fresh, crisp $50 dollar bill. Some good, basic, fundamental principals employed with this endeavor: math, savings, charity. We went to the dollar store, bought 20 stuffed animals, then went to TJ Max and bought some nicer stuffed animals, all of which go to local hospitals for sick children. When the Winterhawks scored their first goal, the teddy bears fly onto the ice. It's a pretty cool deal and we've made this an annual tradition.
We had nosebleed seats for this one, which was fine by us. We're not hockey fans by any means, but it was nice to have a block of 17 friends and family for this outing. But by the end of the 2nd period, a few of the younger kids in our group were growing restless and their parents were ready to head home. Since most of the group took one giant car, that left just 7 of us to watch the final period. By happenstance, a buddy of mine spotted us as he was leaving, saw we were in the nosebleeds and offered us his block of tickets in the front row (front ice?). His group was done for the night and so the 7 of us left took his seats for the final period and were stunned at how much cooler the game was sitting behind the glass. We watched the Winterhawks score 4 goals in the period, watched the guys bang up against the glass and really enjoyed our new accommodations.
That is until a puck came screaming over the glass, missing me and my son by a fraction and slamming right into the head of the 9-year old girl we were with. The guy behind us caught the ricocheted puck and said to us "Man, that was close!" And the young girl even smiled for an instant before realizing she had just been blasted by the damn thing. She started screaming and her mom cradled her head into her hands. When she pulled her hand away, I saw the blood just gushing out. We gathered up the kids and ran towards the exits.
Security met us, made us fill out an incident report and gave us a few options, one of which was getting the hell out of there and taking her to the ER, which we did. I drove their car as my buddy was holding his daughter in his arms and his pregnant wife was just in no shape to drive. I got them to the ER in 5 minutes, driving their ginormous SUV like a man possessed. I took their son with me to my house and we had an impromptu sleep over. Poor girl had to get 3 staples in her head, but she's just fine. No signs of concussion or anything like that. Just a big scar and a cool story for her friends at school.
Oh, my buddy's wife took this photo of her in the ER.
It's a fun event and the kids really get into it, so I got a big group together and away we went. Earlier in the day, the boys and I counted up all our change, rolled it and turned it into the bank for a fresh, crisp $50 dollar bill. Some good, basic, fundamental principals employed with this endeavor: math, savings, charity.
We went to the dollar store, bought 20 stuffed animals, then went to TJ Max and bought some nicer stuffed animals, all of which go to local hospitals for sick children. When the Winterhawks scored their first goal, the teddy bears fly onto the ice. It's a pretty cool deal and we've made this an annual tradition.We had nosebleed seats for this one, which was fine by us. We're not hockey fans by any means, but it was nice to have a block of 17 friends and family for this outing. But by the end of the 2nd period, a few of the younger kids in our group were growing restless and their parents were ready to head home. Since most of the group took one giant car, that left just 7 of us to watch the final period. By happenstance, a buddy of mine spotted us as he was leaving, saw we were in the nosebleeds and offered us his block of tickets in the front row (front ice?). His group was done for the night and so the 7 of us left took his seats for the final period and were stunned at how much cooler the game was sitting behind the glass. We watched the Winterhawks score 4 goals in the period, watched the guys bang up against the glass and really enjoyed our new accommodations.
That is until a puck came screaming over the glass, missing me and my son by a fraction and slamming right into the head of the 9-year old girl we were with. The guy behind us caught the ricocheted puck and said to us "Man, that was close!" And the young girl even smiled for an instant before realizing she had just been blasted by the damn thing. She started screaming and her mom cradled her head into her hands. When she pulled her hand away, I saw the blood just gushing out. We gathered up the kids and ran towards the exits.
Security met us, made us fill out an incident report and gave us a few options, one of which was getting the hell out of there and taking her to the ER, which we did. I drove their car as my buddy was holding his daughter in his arms and his pregnant wife was just in no shape to drive. I got them to the ER in 5 minutes, driving their ginormous SUV like a man possessed. I took their son with me to my house and we had an impromptu sleep over. Poor girl had to get 3 staples in her head, but she's just fine. No signs of concussion or anything like that. Just a big scar and a cool story for her friends at school.
Oh, my buddy's wife took this photo of her in the ER.
General Malaise
Footballguy
This part I got.Got some pretty sweet club section seats to the saints game for free yesterday ($330 face value)Wat?Got some pretty sweet club section seats to the saints game for free yesterday ($330 face value) and there was some chick playing words with friends on here ipad (not iphone) the entire game.
Explain this to me like I'm 89 years old and in a diaper. What is 'playing words' and why did it bother you?
"Ouch."
First row shouldn't be in the line of fire like that.
First row shouldn't be in the line of fire like that.
mr. furley
Footballguy
it's a video game that is basically like the board game Scrabble.I guess he's upset that she was playing a game instead of watching the game.This part I got.Got some pretty sweet club section seats to the saints game for free yesterday ($330 face value)Wat?Got some pretty sweet club section seats to the saints game for free yesterday ($330 face value) and there was some chick playing words with friends on here ipad (not iphone) the entire game.Explain this to me like I'm 89 years old and in a diaper. What is 'playing words' and why did it bother you?
TobiasFunke
Footballguy
KGB
Footballguy
Lesson learned. No good deed goes unpunished
General Malaise
Footballguy
When I sat down, I remember thinking "there's no way a puck can hit us here...physics should prevent that". Pretty sure that line of thinking is what got the Titanic sunk.That puck was flying when it hit her. It should have hit me, but I ducked at the last possible second. I feel like the biggest wuss in the world. I took her flowers yesterday and have felt so awful since it happened. Those seats are dangerous. I'm surprised there aren't more incidents like this.
General Malaise
Footballguy
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