GM's thread about nothing (27 Viewers)

[St. Louis Bob]

though I always thought of you as a dumb ### #######.

True dat.

Thought you weren't drinking for the month of February?

:welcomewagon:Yeah.....

Woke up extra early today to drive my kid to school to catch a bus. He's got a semi out of town baseball game. Although he's probably sitting out due to a bum ankle. I had ZERO plans for the day. Just the way I like it. Then the wife says "we should do something productive today".

She's talking about taking down old wallpaper or some crap. FML

I have a semi right now.We're going to start packing the house up today. After my attempt at a 10 mile walk. FML

 

[St. Louis Bob]

My Dad asked me to help him out on a online account that had a bunch of security questions. One was "what hospital was your first child born at." I thought I knew that but apparently not. A note from my Dad to remind me of how poor we were.

You were born at St. (Crap Hole).I was so broke at that time I had to steal money from the soda machine at AMLL to pay to get in and out of the parking lot(25 cents) when I visited you and your Mother each evening. That's right,each evening-no taking off work,no holding your mother's hand while she lay in the bed with you in the nursery.I had no money,and had to work to get some,so I went in early and worked hard all day.Love you,Dad

 

[Incogneto]

The question that has boggled the mind: what exactly does rock salt technically do to melt snow?

...You're the ####### encyclopedia....

 

[Incogneto]

Alternator isn't recharging, so the truck's running off the slowly dying battery. So no power for the power steering. Belt may have slipped off.ETA: Make sure she stops before the power brakes fail.

Officially appointed the guru of car diagnostics of GM's Thread.We have Bobby Layne the Accountant.Krista the Lawyer.Sarnoff the Car guy.Cosjobs the entrepanoorPickles the scientistShuke the snow plowerMex the Defender of Freedom

yeah, but are there any dr. types in here....and I don't mean the type that watch House.

 

[Gadzooks]

Boys played in the snow for about an hour, building a snow fort with upturned ice-cycles(i have no idea how to spell this) plunked into the snowpacked deck rail.

I don't know how to spell it either, but the way he spelled it makes it sound like something you'd ride in the Frozen Olympics.

 

[krista4]

You left out the moment of sudden epiphany. You know, someone makes a random comment, and it ALAIKAZAAM in a brilliant coincidental moment of realization he figures it out. Cause that is how the genius mind works.

Resident: Well this is going nowhere, I'm gonna get a Danish from the cafeteriaHouse: What was that?Resident: I'm gonna get a DanishHouse: Danish, Danish...COPENHAGEN FLU!!Resident 2: What?House: What else could generate the symptoms of a bleeding rectum, double vision and speaking in tongues!Resident: Copenhagen Flu!!!House: Give her 35 ccs of saline and an antibiotic drip!!

Mr. krista and I both have a sick fascination with this show. I've never watched it except in reruns and on the "Dr. House channel" that Mr. found online. We also found it to be one of the only English-language shows we had in Nicaragua, except they called it "Dr. House" instead.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

You left out the moment of sudden epiphany. You know, someone makes a random comment, and it ALAIKAZAAM in a brilliant coincidental moment of realization he figures it out. Cause that is how the genius mind works.

Resident: Well this is going nowhere, I'm gonna get a Danish from the cafeteriaHouse: What was that?Resident: I'm gonna get a DanishHouse: Danish, Danish...COPENHAGEN FLU!!Resident 2: What?House: What else could generate the symptoms of a bleeding rectum, double vision and speaking in tongues!Resident: Copenhagen Flu!!!House: Give her 35 ccs of saline and an antibiotic drip!!

Although I've never watched this show. Or Bones.

 

[Gadzooks]

Woke up extra early today to drive my kid to school to catch a bus. He's got a semi out of town baseball game. Although he's probably sitting out due to a bum ankle. I had ZERO plans for the day. Just the way I like it. Then the wife says "we should do something productive today".

She's talking about taking down old wallpaper or some crap. FML

I have a semi right now. We're going to start packing the house up today. After my attempt at a 10 mile walk. FML

I was thinking the same thing. I'm not saying that I was thinking that you specifically had a semi, I was thinking that I did. Although I pretty much assume you always have one anyways. Having said that, I have now lost my semi. Thanks alot!!!

 

[Mr.Pack]

The question that has boggled the mind: what exactly does rock salt technically do to melt snow?

...You're the ####### encyclopedia....

 

[Mr.Pack]

Thought you weren't drinking for the month of February?

I don't think he mentioned which February, did he?Just trying to help you out GBSLB

 

[Gadzooks]

The question that has boggled the mind: what exactly does rock salt technically do to melt snow?

...You're the ####### encyclopedia....

 

[charvik]

demonstration on the lawn gone bad though?I think the hypothetical answer will be heavily dependent on how the scenario is set up.

Of course there are a ton of variables. Was watching a bunch of the Middle East stuff and was wondering what the critical mass was with the crowd

in the US? Not ever going to happen, if you are talking spontaneous demonstration.

 

[Early_10]

Alternator isn't recharging, so the truck's running off the slowly dying battery. So no power for the power steering. Belt may have slipped off.ETA: Make sure she stops before the power brakes fail.

Officially appointed the guru of car diagnostics of GM's Thread.We have Bobby Layne the Accountant.Krista the Lawyer.Sarnoff the Car guy.Cosjobs the entrepanoorPickles the scientistShuke the snow plowerMex the Defender of Freedom

yeah, but are there any dr. types in here....and I don't mean the type that watch House.

I consider myself somewhat of an expert on labour and delivery...and kids at the emergency room.

 

[Incogneto]

Alternator isn't recharging, so the truck's running off the slowly dying battery. So no power for the power steering. Belt may have slipped off.ETA: Make sure she stops before the power brakes fail.

Officially appointed the guru of car diagnostics of GM's Thread.We have Bobby Layne the Accountant.Krista the Lawyer.Sarnoff the Car guy.Cosjobs the entrepanoorPickles the scientistShuke the snow plowerMex the Defender of Freedom

yeah, but are there any dr. types in here....and I don't mean the type that watch House.

I consider myself somewhat of an expert on labour and delivery...and kids at the emergency room.

nah...not pregnant...looking for more of a dermatologist.

 

[BobbyLayne]

The question that has boggled the mind: what exactly does rock salt technically do to melt snow?

My 12 y.o. son knows the answer to your quetion:Rock salt lowers the temperature level at which water will freeze - it's called freezing point depression.

At 0° C (32° F), the frozen molecule and water molecules are in dynamic equilibrium. That is, water molecules on the surface of the ice freeze at the same rate frozen molecules melt. You can upset this equilibrium easily - if the outside temperature is lowered, slower moving molecules freeze more quickly, forming more ice. Conversely, if you raise the temperature the H20 molecules move faster and melt more quickly.

Adding salt also disrupts the equilibrium. Water molecules are replaced with molecules of rock salt, which dissolves in the water, but do not pack easily into the array of molecules in the solid ice. So you have fewer water molecules because the some of the water has been replaced by salt. The total number of water molecules captured by the ice per second goes down, so the rate of freezing goes down. The rate of melting is unchanged by the presence of the rock salt, so melting occurs faster than freezing. The simplest way to think about it is the level at which freezing occurs has been depressed.

That's why salt melts ice.

Which is real nice...

 

[Gambino]

You guys aren't satisfied with the Joe Bryant China like ruling of this place...now you're inviting the Secret Service with this White House attack chat?

 

[Mr.Pack]

Got busted by Mrs.Pack today.

She has bought food for DaughterPack, when she comes home from college we always give her food to take back with her.

Well MrsPack bought a bunch of boxes of Pop-Tarts. I love me some Pop-Tarts. Especially the Ice Cream Sundae ones.

I knew DaughterPack wasn't coming home for another month. So I would take a pack to work each day with me, close up the box, and put the box back in the bigger box where her care package was packed with the thinking I would go today and buy a new box, replace it and wallah.

Well, the wife gets this idea to bring up a wooden shelf unit from the basement and put it in the laundry room and organize everything...... including the food for the daughter.

I tried to help out as much as possible, to try and get her to let me stack the shelf unit. I walk away for a minute, come back, and she grabs the empty box of pop-tarts and goes to put them on the shelf. She picks it up, hesitates for a minute, shakes it, and says out loud, "why the hell is this box empty?" I'm standing behind her when I hear her say, "oh that's right I kept this for............. wait, no....." she turns around and looks at me, I'm .

She starts saying "YOU, You ate these!!" I'm like nah, you saved the box remember.....

Couldn't contain my

She is going out with one of her friends today and my plan was so close to working......damnit!

 

[Mr.Pack]

You guys aren't satisfied with the Joe Bryant China like ruling of this place...now you're inviting the Secret Service with this White House attack chat?

I was kinda thinking the same thing.No way was I going to respond in that discussion.

 

[SofaKings]

I pooped my pants at work today. I have one helluva flu. I'm constantly dizzy, wearing a winter coat on top of a sweater (in addition to a beanie), and still a bit cold. I feel nauseous when I don't feel like I'm going to faint. I rarely get sick so this must be one helluva bug.Anyhow, I was sitting at my desk on the phone when I felt my brown babies running for the back door. I couldn't get off the phone so I clenched my cheeks and braced for impact. My sphincter apparently is weakened by this flu as well. I held it off for what seemed to be an eternity. The seconds rolled past and the clock on my pc seemed to freeze. I was fighting the good battle but I was losing and needed to empty the anuus, pronto. I *really* could not get off the phone and I had a panicked look as I felt the first wave break through. I was standing awkwardly with a brown tail trying to reach out and finger my underwear. Finally I was free from the phone - now I just had to make it across the office to deal with an unpleasant situation. I took a normal step and felt the corn rocket squeeze forward. I froze in place to keep the status quo and regain what little composure I still had. I took another step and again things pushed forward. I stood outside my cubicle, slightly hunched over, trying to figure out how to make it across the office without rocking my rectum loose. I eventually developed a two step shuffle. With my right foot angling inward and my left foot moving forward inches at a time, I stumbled my way to the bathroom and punished the porcelain. Only when I was undoing my belt a bit more shot out than I was hoping. I finished my business and wiped until I was raw. I must have flushed at least 5 times. But now I had a bigger problem. The pants were clean but my underwear was smeared with butt mustard. I took them off and washed the excess that had dripped onto my leg. I was now standing in the bathroom butt naked, cradling a pile of poop in a hammock of my underwear. I wrapped it up in a pound of paper towels and after getting dressed I wandered outside to one of the dumpsters and tossed it in.I can't wait to get home today. I've never needed a shower so badly.

Hanging up down?

Roast beef sandwich mudbutt?

 

[Samuel L Bronkowitz]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

 

[Thorn]

Happy Birthday Thorn!

Thanks GB. Though I'm not sure why you and k4 seem to think it was yesterday, but I'll go with it. Just got back from lunch with my dad and brother which turned into 4 hours of drinking, arguing about whether we need to change golf course memberships this year, and arguing about whether my dad's ideal next girlfriend is 35-45 or 40-50. He's 65.

 

[Thorn]

You left out the moment of sudden epiphany. You know, someone makes a random comment, and it ALAIKAZAAM in a brilliant coincidental moment of realization he figures it out. Cause that is how the genius mind works.

you misspelled 'wa la.'

 

[Thorn]

One of these days I'm going to be invited to a "chat"Thorn > Happy belated birthday

Thanks GB. I wish I knew what I had to do to get chat up again. Good times.

 

[Thorn]

The question that has boggled the mind: what exactly does rock salt technically do to melt snow?

It raises the temperature at which eye cycles melt.

 

[Thorn]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER

 

[Samuel L Bronkowitz]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER

Half way through my first one. We bought 4 for the four of us, but two of my GBs decided to go get steaks instead of playing cards before we headed out....so now I (get to?) (have to?) drink 2.Heading downtown in about an hour.

This will get ugly.

 

[Tremendous Upside]

Eating at an Indian restaurant before the movies. This 3 year old multi-racial girl (half black/half Indian) is singing and dancing to the Indian music playing. And she has a British accent. It's like the cutest Benetton ad ever.

 

[Thorn]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER

Half way through my first one. We bought 4 for the four of us, but two of my GBs decided to go get steaks instead of playing cards before we headed out....so now I (get to?) (have to?) drink 2.Heading downtown in about an hour.

This will get ugly.

Did I mention that, in the midst of my five day weekend bender for my birthday, I somehow agreed to lead my mom's book club discussion? That's tomorrow morning. Moron.

 

[urbanhack]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER

Half way through my first one. We bought 4 for the four of us, but two of my GBs decided to go get steaks instead of playing cards before we headed out....so now I (get to?) (have to?) drink 2.Heading downtown in about an hour.

This will get ugly.

I somehow agreed to lead my mom's book club discussion?

 

[Gambino]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER

Half way through my first one. We bought 4 for the four of us, but two of my GBs decided to go get steaks instead of playing cards before we headed out....so now I (get to?) (have to?) drink 2.Heading downtown in about an hour.

This will get ugly.

Did I mention that, in the midst of my five day weekend bender for my birthday, I somehow agreed to lead my mom's book club discussion? That's tomorrow morning. Moron.

That might be a reason to quit drinking, or communicating with your mother...whichever is easier for you.

 

[Gadzooks]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

You just maintain your ability to post this evening, whether in this thread of the drunk thread. And asnwer me this: if one were planning to drink Jack and Coke all night, but got home and realized that he had no Coke and instead of Jack, he had Beam, how would a mixture of Beam and my son's Fruit Punch flavored Capri Sun taste? Since I don't have my son this weekend I did no grocery shopping and the only liquids in my fridge are Fruit Punch flavored Capri-Suns, expired Milk and beer. I'll zip up, hangup and listen.

 

[Limp Ditka]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

You just maintain your ability to post this evening, whether in this thread of the drunk thread. And asnwer me this: if one were planning to drink Jack and Coke all night, but got home and realized that he had no Coke and instead of Jack, he had Beam, how would a mixture of Beam and my son's Fruit Punch flavored Capri Sun taste? Since I don't have my son this weekend I did no grocery shopping and the only liquids in my fridge are Fruit Punch flavored Capri-Suns, expired Milk and beer. I'll zip up, hangup and listen.

How about manning up a little and not ruining the Whiskey with a mixer?

 

[Samuel L Bronkowitz]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

You just maintain your ability to post this evening, whether in this thread of the drunk thread. And asnwer me this: if one were planning to drink Jack and Coke all night, but got home and realized that he had no Coke and instead of Jack, he had Beam, how would a mixture of Beam and my son's Fruit Punch flavored Capri Sun taste? Since I don't have my son this weekend I did no grocery shopping and the only liquids in my fridge are Fruit Punch flavored Capri-Suns, expired Milk and beer. I'll zip up, hangup and listen.

I'm hammered at 730. Go and get some coke. Or drink some jack and

 

[Gadzooks]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

You just maintain your ability to post this evening, whether in this thread of the drunk thread. And asnwer me this: if one were planning to drink Jack and Coke all night, but got home and realized that he had no Coke and instead of Jack, he had Beam, how would a mixture of Beam and my son's Fruit Punch flavored Capri Sun taste? Since I don't have my son this weekend I did no grocery shopping and the only liquids in my fridge are Fruit Punch flavored Capri-Suns, expired Milk and beer. I'll zip up, hangup and listen.

How about manning up a little and not ruining the Whiskey with a mixer?

Consider me manned up now. Good pep talk.... kinda felt like Don Chorleone telling Johnny Fontaine to "...act like a man!!!!!"

 

[charvik]

Eating at an Indian restaurant before the movies. This 3 year old multi-racial girl (half black/half Indian) is singing and dancing to the Indian music playing. And she has a British accent. It's like the cutest Benetton ad ever.

lol

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Eating at an Indian restaurant before the movies. This 3 year old multi-racial girl (half black/half Indian) is singing and dancing to the Indian music playing. And she has a British accent. It's like the cutest Benetton ad ever.

lol

After my walk I figured a little Crazy Bowl was in order. Alright I completely forgot about it. 2.5 hours later and I'm in my chair watching Bear. The look on Dylan's face when he just ate a scorpion was priceless. "That wasn't very nice."

 

[bostonfred]

I somehow agreed to lead my mom's book club discussion?

That doesn't sound that bad. I love hanging out with little old ladies. You can pretty much say anything and theyll tell you you're the most charming handsome man in the world. If you let it be known what your favorite kind of baked goods are, you'll need to make two trips to bring it all home. How hard is it to read a book and talk about what you thought about it? And you get huge points with your mom in the future, which will accrue interest as her friends remind her how nice you were and how they hope you can come again.

 

[Mr.Pack]

Eating at an Indian restaurant before the movies. This 3 year old multi-racial girl (half black/half Indian) is singing and dancing to the Indian music playing. And she has a British accent. It's like the cutest Benetton ad ever.

lol

After my walk I figured a little Crazy Bowl was in order. Alright I completely forgot about it. 2.5 hours later and I'm in my chair watching Bear. The look on Dylan's face when he just ate a scorpion was priceless. "That wasn't very nice."

Is this code for something?

 

[JaxBill]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

DANGER WILL ROBINSON DANGER

Half way through my first one. We bought 4 for the four of us, but two of my GBs decided to go get steaks instead of playing cards before we headed out....so now I (get to?) (have to?) drink 2.Heading downtown in about an hour.

This will get ugly.

Did I mention that, in the midst of my five day weekend bender for my birthday, I somehow agreed to lead my mom's book club discussion? That's tomorrow morning. Moron.

I think the book discussion will go much better tomorrow morning if you have a little coffee with your Kahlua.

 

[JaxBill]

Enjoying the springlike temps, but everything is kicking out pollen right now and my sinuses are not liking it.

 

[JaxBill]

Eating at an Indian restaurant before the movies. This 3 year old multi-racial girl (half black/half Indian) is singing and dancing to the Indian music playing. And she has a British accent. It's like the cutest Benetton ad ever.

lol

After my walk I figured a little Crazy Bowl was in order. Alright I completely forgot about it. 2.5 hours later and I'm in my chair watching Bear. The look on Dylan's face when he just ate a scorpion was priceless. "That wasn't very nice."

Is this code for something?

:IspeakJive:SLB liked TU's story about a little girl dancing in a restaurant.He took a long walk.After the strenuous exercise, he rewarded himself with some cannabis smoked from a pipe whose receptacle is commonly called a bowl.Later, he was in a comfortable chair watching Man vs Wild and one of the characters ate a scorpion which did not suit his epicurian tastes.

 

[Limp Ditka]

I am not responsible for anything I post later tonight.

You just maintain your ability to post this evening, whether in this thread of the drunk thread. And asnwer me this: if one were planning to drink Jack and Coke all night, but got home and realized that he had no Coke and instead of Jack, he had Beam, how would a mixture of Beam and my son's Fruit Punch flavored Capri Sun taste? Since I don't have my son this weekend I did no grocery shopping and the only liquids in my fridge are Fruit Punch flavored Capri-Suns, expired Milk and beer. I'll zip up, hangup and listen.

How about manning up a little and not ruining the Whiskey with a mixer?

Consider me manned up now. Good pep talk.... kinda felt like Don Chorleone telling Johnny Fontaine to "...act like a man!!!!!"

Limp Ditka, here to help.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Oh Christ.

Really? Really?Had no clue you were this guy.

You new here? He is precisely this guy. You should come to chat some day.But he's nothing compared to Kraft.

 

[charvik]

Oh Christ.

Really? Really?Had no clue you were this guy.

You new here? He is precisely this guy. You should come to chat some day.But he's nothing compared to Kraft.

:rene:

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

All Four Loko Drinkers are welcome to chat.

 

[bentley]

All Four Loko Drinkers are welcome to chat.

Even lame "new formula" Four Loko like the stuff posted above?

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

All Four Loko Drinkers are welcome to chat.

Even lame "new formula" Four Loko like the stuff posted above?

Ruling....

YES!

 

[Good Posting Judge]

All Four Loko Drinkers are welcome to chat.

0 users in chat

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

All Four Loko Drinkers are welcome to chat.

0 users in chat

Truck?

 

[Good Posting Judge]

All Four Loko Drinkers are welcome to chat.

0 users in chat

Truck?