Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Yeah, I'm a big Organ Donor guy. Have been as soon as I knew I could be. After that, it's burn me up and scatter me around a race track, a pretty river and a few good bars.
Yep.
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GM's thread about nothing (34 Viewers)
- Thread starter General Malaise
- Start date
Yep.
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
You guys ever drink so much that your liver actually does hurt? Maybe it's a little swollen and hardened too? Yeah, still talking about the liver.
General Malaise
Footballguy
Hi Tre - When you say 'just put up a blog post' can you let me know what 'just put up a blog post' means?Man, just put up a blog post...Mention me in your blog or twitter and it's done.List me in front of Frosty and we should be done here.GOT IT!'Notorious T.R.E. said:
TIA
Peace,
-G
General Malaise
Footballguy
I've been calling this 'soul burn' the last few years. you mean that's actually my liver?
Also, I think Alex Morgan might be one more tweet away from blocking me. 
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
G,First of all, thanks for writing me. Put up a blog post means that I added something new to my blog. In this case I rip on teh gopher football team (pretty standard) and then mention some of the new fall shows that I've watched. See link below.
Bye Week - Let's Watch Some TV
Yours in ever-loving Jesus Christ,
T
Thorn
Footballguy
Can one create an anonymous twitter account?I've been calling this 'soul burn' the last few years. you mean that's actually my liver?
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
New York Flash is a great chick soccer team name. Men's too I guess...mascot could be a dude in a trench coat.I've been calling this 'soul burn' the last few years. you mean that's actually my liver?
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Sure. I don't use my last name because I have an ex-wife and she crazy.Can one create an anonymous twitter account?I've been calling this 'soul burn' the last few years. you mean that's actually my liver?
-fish-
Footballguy
I had a doctor do a general blood panel recently. He told me my liver function was normal and I actually blurted out, "You're kidding."If the cumulative livers in this thread could somehow join forces, we could create a super liver.Scientists discover natural substance 1000 times harder than diamondI have a living will and an agreement to donate my liver to science.
-fish-
Footballguy
tell me more.Sure. I don't use my last name because I have an ex-wife and she crazy.Can one create an anonymous twitter account?I've been calling this 'soul burn' the last few years. you mean that's actually my liver?
Mr.Pack
Footballguy
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Maybe sometime when I'm drunk and bored. It isn't all that entertaining. Secret credit card use, signature loans in my name that I was not privy to, battles with bi-polar/depression stuff, just a general needy jerk.tell me more.Sure. I don't use my last name because I have an ex-wife and she crazy.Can one create an anonymous twitter account?I've been calling this 'soul burn' the last few years. you mean that's actually my liver?
-fish-
Footballguy
bummer. that kind of crazy doesn't do it for me.Maybe sometime when I'm drunk and bored. It isn't all that entertaining. Secret credit card use, signature loans in my name that I was not privy to, battles with bi-polar/depression stuff, just a general needy jerk.tell me more.Sure. I don't use my last name because I have an ex-wife and she crazy.Can one create an anonymous twitter account?I've been calling this 'soul burn' the last few years. you mean that's actually my liver?
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
I work with this guy that is just a weirdo. We'll call him Mitch. 75% of the time he comes across as normal but he when he's off...he's way off. I almost think he's got some mild form of Asperger's. He's a nice guy but sometimes has a problem with personal space and not realizing when he's being inappropriate. He once told a younger female teacher "That dress looks really nice on you." When she said "thanks" he continued with "No, I mean it really fits you well...like everywhere...it just looks really great...I really mean that." I honestly think he was just trying to be nice and sincere but the girl was creeped out.
So anyway earlier in the week there was some random dude that exposed himself to a couple of 6th grade girls about a mile away from the school. The police released the make/model/year of the car he was driving. No less than 3 people made a joke via email (to selected friends) like "Hey, I didn't know Mitch drives a Bronco?" Or "When did Mitch get a Bronco?"
You know you're the campus weirdo when that happens.
So anyway earlier in the week there was some random dude that exposed himself to a couple of 6th grade girls about a mile away from the school. The police released the make/model/year of the car he was driving. No less than 3 people made a joke via email (to selected friends) like "Hey, I didn't know Mitch drives a Bronco?" Or "When did Mitch get a Bronco?"
You know you're the campus weirdo when that happens.
Oh Yes!
Footballguy
Uncle Mitch?I work with this guy that is just a weirdo. We'll call him Mitch. 75% of the time he comes across as normal but he when he's off...he's way off. I almost think he's got some mild form of Asperger's. He's a nice guy but sometimes has a problem with personal space and not realizing when he's being inappropriate. He once told a younger female teacher "That dress looks really nice on you." When she said "thanks" he continued with "No, I mean it really fits you well...like everywhere...it just looks really great...I really mean that." I honestly think he was just trying to be nice and sincere but the girl was creeped out.So anyway earlier in the week there was some random dude that exposed himself to a couple of 6th grade girls about a mile away from the school. The police released the make/model/year of the car he was driving. No less than 3 people made a joke via email (to selected friends) like "Hey, I didn't know Mitch drives a Bronco?" Or "When did Mitch get a Bronco?"
Mr.Pack
Footballguy
Why do you hate beer?
I think St. Louis has plenty of beer. MLB must really like them.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Could be.Uncle Mitch?I work with this guy that is just a weirdo. We'll call him Mitch. 75% of the time he comes across as normal but he when he's off...he's way off. I almost think he's got some mild form of Asperger's. He's a nice guy but sometimes has a problem with personal space and not realizing when he's being inappropriate. He once told a younger female teacher "That dress looks really nice on you." When she said "thanks" he continued with "No, I mean it really fits you well...like everywhere...it just looks really great...I really mean that." I honestly think he was just trying to be nice and sincere but the girl was creeped out.So anyway earlier in the week there was some random dude that exposed himself to a couple of 6th grade girls about a mile away from the school. The police released the make/model/year of the car he was driving. No less than 3 people made a joke via email (to selected friends) like "Hey, I didn't know Mitch drives a Bronco?" Or "When did Mitch get a Bronco?"
General Malaise
Footballguy
So true....this was arguably the worst 5 minutes of TV I've seen in my life. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
JbizzleMan
Footballguy
I roll joints bigger than King Kong's fingers.
mr. furley
Footballguy
Billy Mitchell disagrees
Mr.Pack
Footballguy
Here's to Arletta!
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
Mr.Pack
Footballguy
Scientists discover natural substance 1000 times harder than diamondI have a living will and an agreement to donate my liver to science.
krista4
Footballguy
That's it!Emoticon throwdown!!!I guess I needed to as well? Really?Guess I should have added theThank baby jeebus you people are here to remind me of this.
to my post
krista4
Footballguy
Thanks to both of you for the advice. Update from today: spoke to my boss who knew I was livid. We worked the current matter out to my satisfaction--in fact beyond my expectations. I can and have made the offer to the new employee with no concerns that I'm pulling a bait-and-switch. Essentially the issue had become that at the last minute, he indicated a dual reporting nature for this new role, reporting to both me and my arch-enemy. I don't think dual reporting works in any circumstances, and certainly not in the situation at hand. I also have talked the new person into accepting our job over another that is significantly more lucrative on the basis of her being able to work with my team, which is a big difference as my group is highly respected and valued and the other person's is not. Anyway, boss agreed that the person would report only to me, AND he dropped several broad, unmistakable hints that my enemy is not long for her job (this is not the first time he'd alluded to this). I believe him.
The fix on this issue doesn't solve the overall issue of being unhappy with my job, which is where y'all's good advice comes in. I'll likely start keeping my eyes much more open for other opportunities but won't settle for anything that's not pretty damn good. In this respect, my situation is similar to fish's before his ex screwed it up. I came to this company with a 3-4 year plan because the company will be having an IPO, currently targeted for next year. The IPO payday is a meaningful amount to me and would set us up well for my planned very early retirement. I am two years into the 3-4 year plan and things are very on-track in terms of the payday. It would be a shame to give up on it two years in, unless I just can't bear it anymore or an even better short-term prospect comes along. So I'm kind of where fish was in terms of that.
Anyway, kind of long, but I really appreciate the thoughts and advice.
krista4
Footballguy
I was lucky that my dad had taken care of every little detail, down to every aspect of his funeral (from what songs were played in which order and by whom). I guess I know where I got my OCD, Type A crap from.Thanks andBobby, I love your attitude. I'm sure your mom is proud. I hope to be referred to as the awesome exwife someday.
Hoping folks are getting some good takeaways from all this regarding having a Living Will and do-it-yourself funeral arrangements and solid estate plannings. It's a real blessing to your loved ones who are grieving.
You're particularly lucky that your mom had done this when this came so suddenly. It's an excellent reminder, one I need to follow up on, with respect to living wills in particular. Thanks for sharing that.
krista4
Footballguy
PM Sent
krista4
Footballguy
Impressive.
General Malaise
Footballguy
also, for the record, I'm very content being a "C" guy.
wadegarrett
FFA Legend™
Maker's Mark into Three Olives w/ some Yuengling chaser's. Some kind on the side.
Hi Thursday night.
Hi Thursday night.
kevzilla
Footballguy
I'm pretty fortunate. My new employer views me as an "A" employee, but in reality I reach that level two days a week.also, for the record, I'm very content being a "C" guy.
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Maker's Mark into Three Olives w/ some Yuengling chaser's. Some kind on the side.Hi Thursday night.
IBATB
Tremendous Upside
Footballguy
YBATB?IBATB!Maker's Mark into Three Olives w/ some Yuengling chaser's. Some kind on the side.Hi Thursday night.
Dungeon Master
Footballguy
Now following @smokingroaches.Man, just put up a blog post...Mention me in your blog or twitter and it's done.List me in front of Frosty and we should be done here.GOT IT!'Notorious T.R.E. said:
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
It's working! (the alcohol)
Tremendous Upside
Footballguy
Mmmmmm. Jalapeño Picklebacks.
Dungeon Master
Footballguy
Tell me more.
Tremendous Upside
Footballguy
Shot of Jameson with a back of a pickle juice shot. These particular ones were jalapeño pickle juice shots. Tremendous. Just tremendous.
What the hell is wrong with some of you??? It is just now 6pm on the Left Coast and only 9pm on the Right...it is however 4am here in the mid-east district and I am fullX2. Thursday night here is a U.S. Friday night and Captain 100 tastes pretty damn golden. Is the drunk thread locked yet? Happy sailings y'all. Enjoy the weekend once it hits. 30 days until I get back to the States, can't come soon enough.
For my many followers, I resolved my earlier return conundrum. Shaven legs and a ride home from PDX won out.
edited because I can't figure out left and right.
edit#2 300 posts and most of them here...thanks for the home, you are a bunch of funny ####ers when things don't get too sad.
For my many followers, I resolved my earlier return conundrum. Shaven legs and a ride home from PDX won out.
edited because I can't figure out left and right.
edit#2 300 posts and most of them here...thanks for the home, you are a bunch of funny ####ers when things don't get too sad.
Last edited by a moderator:
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
:boner:
Last edited by a moderator:
Tremendous Upside
Footballguy
Life is sad and painful punctuated all too infrequently by moments of levity and joy. I'm just happy the thread has a higher ratio of the latter to the former than life does. Wow that came out much more morose than intended. I think someone roofed my pickleback with A barbituate.
UOFI_316
Footballguy
Pretty sure you don't need to shave your legs to get a ride home.
Gadzooks
Footballguy
At different moments in life I can be stupid, I can be drunk or I can be horny. On nights when I am all 3 of those things, well, lets just say that bad things happen. And last night was one of those nights.
It started at work as I was stuck in meetings all day. I have a female co-worker (we'll call her Liz to protect the innocent, though she's not really that innocent) Liz works in another office in another town but she was in these meetings with me yesterday. Now, a couple years ago, Liz and I "fooled around" a little bit after the company X-mas party but nothing else ever happened after that which is good, she is about 10 years younger than me. We talk and email from time to time and occasionally text. Sometimes we're a little flirty, but nothing to wild. While in the meetings yesterday, she texts me and asks if I want to get a beer after the meeting, I say yes. At this point of the day I am only stupid and horny. So we get out somewhat early around 4. We hit a bar and have a few beers. She says she has to get home and do an online test for some class she's taking. She asks me to go with her to help her with the test and then we can go out for another beer. Since I'm already stupid and horny and now on the verge of being drunk, I happily agree to go to her place.
Now, let me just say that I am usually totally against any work-place romance or hook ups. Nothing good can come from them. However, last night I was stupid and horny and beginning to get drunk. So I then decided that the work-place romance/hook up would actually be a good thing, sort of like a team-building activity. After about 5 minutes of looking at her online test, we said screw it and went to a bar. It was literally down the street from her apartment and we walked there. Seemed like a dirty little hole in the wall bar where only "regulars" went to. After a few beers and a couple shots, Liz was very drunk and very touchy-feely with me. And by "touchy-feely" I mean she kept grabbing my junk. Now Liz isn't a knockout or anything (definitely not Amanda H.) but she's fairly cute and may appear to be a little chubby. I was now stupid, horny and drunk. Liz could have looked like SLB and I give it a go. So while she stumbles to the ladies room (she tripped and fell twice) I decided to hangout with the "regulars" at the other end of the bar. I don't think they liked me at first since I was still dressed up from work. However, after telling them a dirty joke and buying a round of shots, they seemed to love me. Strangely enough, they were discussing Greek mythology and one of them referenced "Simpson" the guy who had all of his strength from his hair. Another guy interrupted him and said "I think you mean Sampson", then I interjected and said "I believe the man you are referring to with the hair is named Kevzilla". This then started a debate about Godzilla and Hercules. I really liked those guys.
Drunk Liz then came stumbling out of the ladies room and immediately began grabbing my crotch again. She began whispering things in my ear that made no sense at all, but I didn't really care. But then she pulled me close and whispered the following: "I want you to put your big manly parts in my little girly parts" (I smiled and thought of Homer) So we walk back to her place and before we go inside, she jumps in my car and wants to go get food. I told her no. So then we just started fooling around in the car. I kept telling her that we should go inside, but she refused and kept referring to herself as "baby" and kept saying "baby wants to stay in the car, vroom... vrooom..... vrooom... baby wants to go vroooom... vroom". She began biting my earlobe, like really biting it very roughly, to the point that it was more painful than pleasureable. Then she suddenly stopped and decided we should go inside now. She opened the car door and promptly fell out. She got up, swore at the car door and then looked at me and said "c'mon Baby, we're going in." Apparently now I was "Baby". So I said "vrooom...vroooooooom" and we went inside.
When she took her shoes off, I realized just how short she was. I'm guessing she's 4 foot 10 or maybe 4 foot 11 if she's lucky. She really seemed kinda midget-ish to me. Since I was stupid, drunk and horny, I found the "midget-ish-ness" to be intriguing. Now I am absolutely not tall at all, but next her I felt like I was Abraham Lincoln without the top hat. So we started really fooling around in the kitchen. I noticed the window over her sink was wide open and there was another apartment directly across from it, maybe 10 feet away. I wondered if anyone in that apartment was watching me and my drunk munchkin going at it. With her being midget-ish and me being kinda short, I figured if anyone was watching us at that exact moment, it must have looked like Spud Webb trying to box out John Stockton.
We moved into the bedroom and I found it cute how she seemed to burp just as much as she moaned. After we finished, I was completely exhausted and ready to pass out. Not my little munchkin though. She wanted to wrestle and attempted several times to put me in a figure-4 leg lock. Finally she settled down and seemed to fall asleep as she began snoring. I started to drift off to sleep only to be awakened by her pinching my nipple and biting my arm. She explained that they were love bites and she was ready for round 2. I knew I was not capable of round 2 and tried to hint that to her. But there was no stopping her. She was all over me, but I was literally spent and had nothing to contribute, knowing that I only had a few short hours to get some sleep before going to work. But she persisted and began slowing nibbling on my ear which then led to her biting my ear. I mean really biting and pulling it like she wanted to rip my ear off. She was like a pit bull gnawing on my ear like it was steak. I finally yelled out "QUIT IT" (totally sounded like Bobby Brady telling Peter Brady to stop picking on him) She asked why and I said "because it's starting to feel like your Mike Tyson and I'm a Miss America contestant" and she replied, "oh so you like it rough, ok, slap me in the face". I was confused, scared and starting to sober up and realize what a bad decision this night was. I convinced her to let me go use the bathroom and I literally hid out in there for about 20 minutes contemplating how I could escape from her apartment. I was too tired to do anything so I finally go back to the bedroom and she's totally passed out. I quietly got into bed and went to sleep, though I was worried at the thought of her possibly waking up and doing God knows what to my sleeping body.
We wake up and my only goal was to get out of dodge. She insisted on me staying in bed with her for awhile. I told her no and that I had to get home and get ready for work. She was ok with that and said how she had to get ready for work as well. So I got dressed and noticed I have several bite marks and bruises on my body. I'm wondering if they can perform a rape kit on a male? Maybe I should get checked out? Anyways, I got in my car and it had the worst smell ever. Like a dead skunk got set on fire and someone put out the fire with Moose urine. I have no idea what that's all about, but the stench is still there and seems to be getting stronger as the day goes on. So as I drive home with the windows open in the pouring rain,the crazy stalking begins. In all the time I've known her, she has never called my cell phone, we've texted here and there but never called. Within 10 minutes of me leaving, she called me. I didn't answer and figured I'd tell her I didn't have service when she called. She left a voicemail saying how fun the night was and we should do it again, but not mention it to anyone at work. She sent me 14 texts throughout the day today. A lot were just "wow, what a hangover today, what about you?" and stuff like that. But I will share with you a couple of crazy texts she sent:
"Hey, you farted in your sleep last night and you know what? I kinda liked the smell. Is that weird?"
"You left your T-shirt here. It smells like you, I think I'm gonna wear it to bed tonight."
"Instead of being at work, I wish I was still in bed canoodeling with you."
I think I'm gonna need Homer to come to New England do his "Aaron Rudnicki" shtick on this girl. Her last 2 texts were asking what I was doing tonight. You have no idea how badly I wish I would've stayed home, drank alone and posted in the drunk thread before making some chicken and catching a jerk to Cathouse.
Fish: Let me know if you and your bat-crazy chick wanna double date with me and the sexual munchkin deviant.
It started at work as I was stuck in meetings all day. I have a female co-worker (we'll call her Liz to protect the innocent, though she's not really that innocent) Liz works in another office in another town but she was in these meetings with me yesterday. Now, a couple years ago, Liz and I "fooled around" a little bit after the company X-mas party but nothing else ever happened after that which is good, she is about 10 years younger than me. We talk and email from time to time and occasionally text. Sometimes we're a little flirty, but nothing to wild. While in the meetings yesterday, she texts me and asks if I want to get a beer after the meeting, I say yes. At this point of the day I am only stupid and horny. So we get out somewhat early around 4. We hit a bar and have a few beers. She says she has to get home and do an online test for some class she's taking. She asks me to go with her to help her with the test and then we can go out for another beer. Since I'm already stupid and horny and now on the verge of being drunk, I happily agree to go to her place.
Now, let me just say that I am usually totally against any work-place romance or hook ups. Nothing good can come from them. However, last night I was stupid and horny and beginning to get drunk. So I then decided that the work-place romance/hook up would actually be a good thing, sort of like a team-building activity. After about 5 minutes of looking at her online test, we said screw it and went to a bar. It was literally down the street from her apartment and we walked there. Seemed like a dirty little hole in the wall bar where only "regulars" went to. After a few beers and a couple shots, Liz was very drunk and very touchy-feely with me. And by "touchy-feely" I mean she kept grabbing my junk. Now Liz isn't a knockout or anything (definitely not Amanda H.) but she's fairly cute and may appear to be a little chubby. I was now stupid, horny and drunk. Liz could have looked like SLB and I give it a go. So while she stumbles to the ladies room (she tripped and fell twice) I decided to hangout with the "regulars" at the other end of the bar. I don't think they liked me at first since I was still dressed up from work. However, after telling them a dirty joke and buying a round of shots, they seemed to love me. Strangely enough, they were discussing Greek mythology and one of them referenced "Simpson" the guy who had all of his strength from his hair. Another guy interrupted him and said "I think you mean Sampson", then I interjected and said "I believe the man you are referring to with the hair is named Kevzilla". This then started a debate about Godzilla and Hercules. I really liked those guys.
Drunk Liz then came stumbling out of the ladies room and immediately began grabbing my crotch again. She began whispering things in my ear that made no sense at all, but I didn't really care. But then she pulled me close and whispered the following: "I want you to put your big manly parts in my little girly parts" (I smiled and thought of Homer) So we walk back to her place and before we go inside, she jumps in my car and wants to go get food. I told her no. So then we just started fooling around in the car. I kept telling her that we should go inside, but she refused and kept referring to herself as "baby" and kept saying "baby wants to stay in the car, vroom... vrooom..... vrooom... baby wants to go vroooom... vroom". She began biting my earlobe, like really biting it very roughly, to the point that it was more painful than pleasureable. Then she suddenly stopped and decided we should go inside now. She opened the car door and promptly fell out. She got up, swore at the car door and then looked at me and said "c'mon Baby, we're going in." Apparently now I was "Baby". So I said "vrooom...vroooooooom" and we went inside.
When she took her shoes off, I realized just how short she was. I'm guessing she's 4 foot 10 or maybe 4 foot 11 if she's lucky. She really seemed kinda midget-ish to me. Since I was stupid, drunk and horny, I found the "midget-ish-ness" to be intriguing. Now I am absolutely not tall at all, but next her I felt like I was Abraham Lincoln without the top hat. So we started really fooling around in the kitchen. I noticed the window over her sink was wide open and there was another apartment directly across from it, maybe 10 feet away. I wondered if anyone in that apartment was watching me and my drunk munchkin going at it. With her being midget-ish and me being kinda short, I figured if anyone was watching us at that exact moment, it must have looked like Spud Webb trying to box out John Stockton.
We moved into the bedroom and I found it cute how she seemed to burp just as much as she moaned. After we finished, I was completely exhausted and ready to pass out. Not my little munchkin though. She wanted to wrestle and attempted several times to put me in a figure-4 leg lock. Finally she settled down and seemed to fall asleep as she began snoring. I started to drift off to sleep only to be awakened by her pinching my nipple and biting my arm. She explained that they were love bites and she was ready for round 2. I knew I was not capable of round 2 and tried to hint that to her. But there was no stopping her. She was all over me, but I was literally spent and had nothing to contribute, knowing that I only had a few short hours to get some sleep before going to work. But she persisted and began slowing nibbling on my ear which then led to her biting my ear. I mean really biting and pulling it like she wanted to rip my ear off. She was like a pit bull gnawing on my ear like it was steak. I finally yelled out "QUIT IT" (totally sounded like Bobby Brady telling Peter Brady to stop picking on him) She asked why and I said "because it's starting to feel like your Mike Tyson and I'm a Miss America contestant" and she replied, "oh so you like it rough, ok, slap me in the face". I was confused, scared and starting to sober up and realize what a bad decision this night was. I convinced her to let me go use the bathroom and I literally hid out in there for about 20 minutes contemplating how I could escape from her apartment. I was too tired to do anything so I finally go back to the bedroom and she's totally passed out. I quietly got into bed and went to sleep, though I was worried at the thought of her possibly waking up and doing God knows what to my sleeping body.
We wake up and my only goal was to get out of dodge. She insisted on me staying in bed with her for awhile. I told her no and that I had to get home and get ready for work. She was ok with that and said how she had to get ready for work as well. So I got dressed and noticed I have several bite marks and bruises on my body. I'm wondering if they can perform a rape kit on a male? Maybe I should get checked out? Anyways, I got in my car and it had the worst smell ever. Like a dead skunk got set on fire and someone put out the fire with Moose urine. I have no idea what that's all about, but the stench is still there and seems to be getting stronger as the day goes on. So as I drive home with the windows open in the pouring rain,the crazy stalking begins. In all the time I've known her, she has never called my cell phone, we've texted here and there but never called. Within 10 minutes of me leaving, she called me. I didn't answer and figured I'd tell her I didn't have service when she called. She left a voicemail saying how fun the night was and we should do it again, but not mention it to anyone at work. She sent me 14 texts throughout the day today. A lot were just "wow, what a hangover today, what about you?" and stuff like that. But I will share with you a couple of crazy texts she sent:
"Hey, you farted in your sleep last night and you know what? I kinda liked the smell. Is that weird?"
"You left your T-shirt here. It smells like you, I think I'm gonna wear it to bed tonight."
"Instead of being at work, I wish I was still in bed canoodeling with you."
I think I'm gonna need Homer to come to New England do his "Aaron Rudnicki" shtick on this girl. Her last 2 texts were asking what I was doing tonight. You have no idea how badly I wish I would've stayed home, drank alone and posted in the drunk thread before making some chicken and catching a jerk to Cathouse.
Fish: Let me know if you and your bat-crazy chick wanna double date with me and the sexual munchkin deviant.
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