GM's thread about nothing (37 Viewers)

[flysack]

The problem was advertising. Nobody would take seriously a thirtysomething man in tabi boots and a hood snapping rubbers around his armpits and crotch...

I would take that very very seriously.

HELLO, EXACTLY!I told ninja to stick with it. He pulled out too early, which just isn't his style.

 

[heckmanm]

GM and Furley>you should check out My link

place looks awesome. what a view.

Stopped in briefly when I was in Oregon on my honeymoon a few years ago. Taking both beer and the view in combination, probably my favorite brewpub I've visited.

 

[Abraham]

Rfw - glad you are here. You will fit tight in.

Thank you sir.I was a little at a loss for where to post/if to post in the FFA and then I stumbled into this hotbed of brilliance/stupidity.Speaking of brilliance/stupidity, am I the only person on the planet who think the show Criminal Minds (particularly the early episodes with Mandy Patinkin) are so terrible/poorly written than they are hysterical.I started watching that show after I was oxy post-Achilles surgery, and I could not believe the unintended humor. I guess that's what happens when a bunch of regular folks have to try to write for the way super genius profilers might talk in a way that the average American viewer can understand.I say, get the substance of our choice, some popcorn, wait for a 2006ish Criminal Minds marathon on A&E or Ion (if you get it) and let the good times roll.

Early shows are the suck. The west wing is my favorite show ever, but the pilot is so awful it's a miracle the rest of the series ever aired.

 

[kevzilla]

Yep. Told him this awhile back.

Figured someone had to. Figured i was you + several others. However, I just jumped into this thread a couple days ago, and I wasn't sure where the conversation started/tangented.You are a good friend proninja.

also- question for proninja

was there a decisive moment when you knew you had moved from being a more hobbyist style amateur ninja to a full a pro ninja? was there an awards ceremony? chicken salad sammiches?

No, no, no. The "pro" is for "prophylactic," referring to his botched attempt to found a new form of martial arts based on condoms as weapons. In theory it made sense: develop a self-defense system targeted to prostitutes, a demographic at high risk of violence whose market had never been tapped (at least the way ninja wanted to tap it). The problem was advertising. Nobody would take seriously a thirtysomething man in tabi boots and a hood snapping rubbers around his armpits and crotch...

Enter the Trojan

 

[Abraham]

Stu - frightened rabbit at Trees on April 15 (it's a Saturday!!). Not sold out. Wtf?

 

[Leeroy Jenkins]

Always surprised when people willingly live in the 2nd/3rd world.

I willingly lived in Mississippi for 4.5 years.

Well they just officially ratified the 13th amendment, so they have that going for them.

 

[Leeroy Jenkins]

For me, it was when I stumbled across this site more than a decade ago. I even posted a link to it on the old yeller board.

Rulez.

I Hondaed that link on this board I think.

 

[Ignoramus]

Rfw - glad you are here. You will fit tight in.

Thank you sir.I was a little at a loss for where to post/if to post in the FFA and then I stumbled into this hotbed of brilliance/stupidity.Speaking of brilliance/stupidity, am I the only person on the planet who think the show Criminal Minds (particularly the early episodes with Mandy Patinkin) are so terrible/poorly written than they are hysterical.I started watching that show after I was oxy post-Achilles surgery, and I could not believe the unintended humor. I guess that's what happens when a bunch of regular folks have to try to write for the way super genius profilers might talk in a way that the average American viewer can understand.I say, get the substance of our choice, some popcorn, wait for a 2006ish Criminal Minds marathon on A&E or Ion (if you get it) and let the good times roll.

Early shows are the suck. The west wing is my favorite show ever, but the pilot is so awful it's a miracle the rest of the series ever aired.

Yeah, I tried to hep my old man to this awesome show called Arrested Development so I fired up the Netflix on the PS3 (suck it, GM) and started from the beginning. Big mistake. Silence.Pretty sure he wrote me out of his will after that debacle.

 

[rabidfireweasel]

I appreciate it guys. I've had to remind myself a few times I'm having a conversation with the heroin. He'd actually been off heroin for over a year, but he'd been on suboxone, wasn't able to get that from his doc anymore, and started using heroin instead. The good news is he's off suboxone, now we just need to get him off the heroin. Talked with a different friend (another multiple inpatient who used to rent a room from me) who knows the guy last night, and her response was "XXXX is still alive? That surprises me. We had to stop hanging out because he couldn't stop using." That was depressing.

Here's one more thing for you to remember. For you, the (mostly) normal non-addict, things will be better when your friend quits. However, this is an oversimplification and is just not the case at all. Anecdote:I started drinking regularly when I was 14. When I was 16, I was a full blow alcoholic, drinking a lot every day. No one noticed because I could read people, could lie, and could crush any high school or standardized test I was given. When I was 17, I was a school valedictorian and at Stanford on scholarship for engineering. By the time I was 20, I was living in a trailer on the Stanford campus, spending every night in the Rodin sculpture garden, trying to drink one more shot than the day before, without puking. I wanted to die. It was leaving las vegas, years before the movie. Within 6 months, I was a homeless dropout sleeping under buildings, cut off from parents and stealing food. Yeah, I'm that jackass that got into a good school and somehow couldn't finish. The kicker of it is, I became homeless after I STOPPED drinking. Everyone thinks that you are fixed once you stop the substance. However, that is nonsense.All the cessation of substance does is that it allows you the opportunity to discover why your life was so void/meaningless that you slipped into oblivion. Now, you have to do the real heavy living, trying to fabricate a new foreign life with enough short moments of happiness/ joy in the world that you disdained so much that you opted out in the first place. You probably aren't wired exactly right, or you wouldn't have found yourself here in the first place.I lost a ton of friends, and those that stood by me all said at some point: "You know, you were much more pleasant as an alcoholic. You really are just a mean **** now."I abused my new found need to express myself in order to keep from getting bottled up. I vented and broke things and people. It wasn't until I started redefining myself by what I could do, as opposed to what I could no longer do, that I chance at a life not made unmanageable by alcohol. Even then, in hard times, like break ups, my dad's death, my wife's miscarriage- it is hard to walk the path. Real hard.So, for you, and good bless you- you are trying to get your buddy in a clinic. However, the real work hasn't even started. He has to build, from zero, a life better worth living sober. And for people who have addictive ersonalities and diminished capabilities for joy, that is some hard #### to manage.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Dana Delany is still hot as hell.

 

[Tiger Fan]

I appreciate it guys. I've had to remind myself a few times I'm having a conversation with the heroin. He'd actually been off heroin for over a year, but he'd been on suboxone, wasn't able to get that from his doc anymore, and started using heroin instead. The good news is he's off suboxone, now we just need to get him off the heroin. Talked with a different friend (another multiple inpatient who used to rent a room from me) who knows the guy last night, and her response was "XXXX is still alive? That surprises me. We had to stop hanging out because he couldn't stop using." That was depressing.

Here's one more thing for you to remember. For you, the (mostly) normal non-addict, things will be better when your friend quits. However, this is an oversimplification and is just not the case at all. Anecdote:I started drinking regularly when I was 14. When I was 16, I was a full blow alcoholic, drinking a lot every day. No one noticed because I could read people, could lie, and could crush any high school or standardized test I was given. When I was 17, I was a school valedictorian and at Stanford on scholarship for engineering. By the time I was 20, I was living in a trailer on the Stanford campus, spending every night in the Rodin sculpture garden, trying to drink one more shot than the day before, without puking. I wanted to die. It was leaving las vegas, years before the movie. Within 6 months, I was a homeless dropout sleeping under buildings, cut off from parents and stealing food. Yeah, I'm that jackass that got into a good school and somehow couldn't finish. The kicker of it is, I became homeless after I STOPPED drinking. Everyone thinks that you are fixed once you stop the substance. However, that is nonsense.All the cessation of substance does is that it allows you the opportunity to discover why your life was so void/meaningless that you slipped into oblivion. Now, you have to do the real heavy living, trying to fabricate a new foreign life with enough short moments of happiness/ joy in the world that you disdained so much that you opted out in the first place. You probably aren't wired exactly right, or you wouldn't have found yourself here in the first place.I lost a ton of friends, and those that stood by me all said at some point: "You know, you were much more pleasant as an alcoholic. You really are just a mean **** now."I abused my new found need to express myself in order to keep from getting bottled up. I vented and broke things and people. It wasn't until I started redefining myself by what I could do, as opposed to what I could no longer do, that I chance at a life not made unmanageable by alcohol. Even then, in hard times, like break ups, my dad's death, my wife's miscarriage- it is hard to walk the path. Real hard.So, for you, and good bless you- you are trying to get your buddy in a clinic. However, the real work hasn't even started. He has to build, from zero, a life better worth living sober. And for people who have addictive ersonalities and diminished capabilities for joy, that is some hard #### to manage.

My notebook is horrible...but how long have you been sober?

 

[rabidfireweasel]

My notebook is horrible...but how long have you been sober?

If you define sober as alcohol free- almost 22 years. If you define it as substance free, about 4 days.

 

[Tiger Fan]

My notebook is horrible...but how long have you been sober?

If you define sober as alcohol free- almost 22 years. If you define it as substance free, about 4 days.

gotcha. So alcohol is the only thing that you're "addicted" to...or what?

 

[proninja]

I appreciate it guys. I've had to remind myself a few times I'm having a conversation with the heroin. He'd actually been off heroin for over a year, but he'd been on suboxone, wasn't able to get that from his doc anymore, and started using heroin instead. The good news is he's off suboxone, now we just need to get him off the heroin. Talked with a different friend (another multiple inpatient who used to rent a room from me) who knows the guy last night, and her response was "XXXX is still alive? That surprises me. We had to stop hanging out because he couldn't stop using." That was depressing.

Here's one more thing for you to remember. For you, the (mostly) normal non-addict, things will be better when your friend quits. However, this is an oversimplification and is just not the case at all. Anecdote:I started drinking regularly when I was 14. When I was 16, I was a full blow alcoholic, drinking a lot every day. No one noticed because I could read people, could lie, and could crush any high school or standardized test I was given. When I was 17, I was a school valedictorian and at Stanford on scholarship for engineering. By the time I was 20, I was living in a trailer on the Stanford campus, spending every night in the Rodin sculpture garden, trying to drink one more shot than the day before, without puking. I wanted to die. It was leaving las vegas, years before the movie. Within 6 months, I was a homeless dropout sleeping under buildings, cut off from parents and stealing food. Yeah, I'm that jackass that got into a good school and somehow couldn't finish. The kicker of it is, I became homeless after I STOPPED drinking. Everyone thinks that you are fixed once you stop the substance. However, that is nonsense.All the cessation of substance does is that it allows you the opportunity to discover why your life was so void/meaningless that you slipped into oblivion. Now, you have to do the real heavy living, trying to fabricate a new foreign life with enough short moments of happiness/ joy in the world that you disdained so much that you opted out in the first place. You probably aren't wired exactly right, or you wouldn't have found yourself here in the first place.I lost a ton of friends, and those that stood by me all said at some point: "You know, you were much more pleasant as an alcoholic. You really are just a mean **** now."I abused my new found need to express myself in order to keep from getting bottled up. I vented and broke things and people. It wasn't until I started redefining myself by what I could do, as opposed to what I could no longer do, that I chance at a life not made unmanageable by alcohol. Even then, in hard times, like break ups, my dad's death, my wife's miscarriage- it is hard to walk the path. Real hard.So, for you, and good bless you- you are trying to get your buddy in a clinic. However, the real work hasn't even started. He has to build, from zero, a life better worth living sober. And for people who have addictive ersonalities and diminished capabilities for joy, that is some hard #### to manage.

You should post more here

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

So I'm guessing no shot vids from RFW then...

 

[SofaKings]

And here I thought the thread would go into a lull after coshole....thank Joe Bryant for bringing us RFW, a FBG original.

 

[rabidfireweasel]

My notebook is horrible...but how long have you been sober?

If you define sober as alcohol free- almost 22 years. If you define it as substance free, about 4 days.

gotcha. So alcohol is the only thing that you're "addicted" to...or what?

Alcohol is the only thing that I dream about. I can eat chicken marsala and feel the wine shooting through me. It is like a spark, a fire and there is no dabbling in that fire. I want more and more and more.I often wonder, after all these years, after all this discipline I've learned, after all the times I've said "no, not this time" if I could manage drinking again. The arrogant part of me- which is huge- believes I could. But there is a small part of me, the poker player who knows that 22-1 shots come in about once every 23 times, that I might not have it in me. That I might just be broken when it comes to alcohol.If that's the case, then I am risking throwing away everything: my wife, my kids, my job- my life that I've so hard to build, just to taste the fire one more time. When I get to that conclusion, and I always eventually do, I decide to hold off on drinking again, at least for today.For me, the whole AA thing has never worked. I went to meetings, at first, but I felt that people were just replacing drinking with coffee, cigarettes and AA. I didn't want to recover anything, I needed to make something new. I was defensive and petulant, but all I heard was' Poor me, and then this happened, poor me" and I was like- Poor me- you can just pour me a drink, cause you people are killing me. Still, I am happy for that one day at a time mantra, cause that helps me keep it all together.

 

[Frostillicus]

I won $9 playing bar bingo tonight. Wife won nothing. I told her it was just like real life where I bring home money and she contributes nothing. I thought she'd laugh at that more than she did.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

I won $9 playing bar bingo tonight. Wife won nothing.

Divorce her. You're doing all the heavy lifting.

 

[Tiger Fan]

My notebook is horrible...but how long have you been sober?

If you define sober as alcohol free- almost 22 years. If you define it as substance free, about 4 days.

gotcha. So alcohol is the only thing that you're "addicted" to...or what?

Alcohol is the only thing that I dream about. I can eat chicken marsala and feel the wine shooting through me. It is like a spark, a fire and there is no dabbling in that fire. I want more and more and more.I often wonder, after all these years, after all this discipline I've learned, after all the times I've said "no, not this time" if I could manage drinking again. The arrogant part of me- which is huge- believes I could. But there is a small part of me, the poker player who knows that 22-1 shots come in once every 22 times, that I might not have it in me. That I might just be broken when it comes to alcohol.If that's the case, then I am risking throwing away everything: my wife, my kids, my job- my life that I've so hard to build, just to taste the fire one more time. When I get to that conclusion, and I always eventually do, I decide to hold off on drinking again, at least for today.For me, the whole AA thing has never worked. I went to meetings, at first, but I felt that people were just replacing drinking with coffee, cigarettes and AA. I didn't want to recover anything, I needed to make something new. I was defensive and petulant, but all I heard was' Poor me, and then this happened, poor me" and I was like- Poor me- you can just pour me a drink, cause you people are killing me. Still, I am happy for that one day at a time mantra, cause that helps me keep it all together.

Glad you figured out something that worked for you

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

I won $9 playing bar bingo tonight. Wife won nothing. I told her it was just like real life where I bring home money and she contributes nothing. I thought she'd laugh at that more than she did.

 

[rabidfireweasel]

Glad you figured out something that worked for you

It sounds more dramatic than it is. At the end of the day, we are all just juggling the crap we can ditch, the things we need to do, and the stuff we'd love to do. My specifics just lend themselves a bit more to storytelling.

 

[rabidfireweasel]

I won $9 playing bar bingo tonight. Wife won nothing. I told her it was just like real life where I bring home money and she contributes nothing. I thought she'd laugh at that more than she did.

You should remind her that if there is one thing worse than a deadbeat, it is angry, bitter deadbeat.That, plus a Colt 45 (the alcohol endorsed by Ice Cube and Billy Dee Williams- not the firearm, should help set her straight and get her in the mood quicker.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

I won $9 playing bar bingo tonight. Wife won nothing. I told her it was just like real life where I bring home money and she contributes nothing. I thought she'd laugh at that more than she did.

 

[Disco Stu]

Stu - frightened rabbit at Trees on April 15 (it's a Saturday!!). Not sold out. Wtf?

Somehow that slid under the radar until yesterday. We bought tickets last night. It probably will sell out soon.

 

[T Bell]

It occurs to me that these two, back-to-back posts are the GMTAN in a nutshell.

I appreciate it guys. I've had to remind myself a few times I'm having a conversation with the heroin. He'd actually been off heroin for over a year, but he'd been on suboxone, wasn't able to get that from his doc anymore, and started using heroin instead. The good news is he's off suboxone, now we just need to get him off the heroin. Talked with a different friend (another multiple inpatient who used to rent a room from me) who knows the guy last night, and her response was "XXXX is still alive? That surprises me. We had to stop hanging out because he couldn't stop using." That was depressing.

Here's one more thing for you to remember. For you, the (mostly) normal non-addict, things will be better when your friend quits. However, this is an oversimplification and is just not the case at all. Anecdote:I started drinking regularly when I was 14. When I was 16, I was a full blow alcoholic, drinking a lot every day. No one noticed because I could read people, could lie, and could crush any high school or standardized test I was given. When I was 17, I was a school valedictorian and at Stanford on scholarship for engineering. By the time I was 20, I was living in a trailer on the Stanford campus, spending every night in the Rodin sculpture garden, trying to drink one more shot than the day before, without puking. I wanted to die. It was leaving las vegas, years before the movie. Within 6 months, I was a homeless dropout sleeping under buildings, cut off from parents and stealing food. Yeah, I'm that jackass that got into a good school and somehow couldn't finish. The kicker of it is, I became homeless after I STOPPED drinking. Everyone thinks that you are fixed once you stop the substance. However, that is nonsense.All the cessation of substance does is that it allows you the opportunity to discover why your life was so void/meaningless that you slipped into oblivion. Now, you have to do the real heavy living, trying to fabricate a new foreign life with enough short moments of happiness/ joy in the world that you disdained so much that you opted out in the first place. You probably aren't wired exactly right, or you wouldn't have found yourself here in the first place.I lost a ton of friends, and those that stood by me all said at some point: "You know, you were much more pleasant as an alcoholic. You really are just a mean **** now."I abused my new found need to express myself in order to keep from getting bottled up. I vented and broke things and people. It wasn't until I started redefining myself by what I could do, as opposed to what I could no longer do, that I chance at a life not made unmanageable by alcohol. Even then, in hard times, like break ups, my dad's death, my wife's miscarriage- it is hard to walk the path. Real hard.So, for you, and good bless you- you are trying to get your buddy in a clinic. However, the real work hasn't even started. He has to build, from zero, a life better worth living sober. And for people who have addictive ersonalities and diminished capabilities for joy, that is some hard #### to manage.

Dana Delany is still hot as hell.

 

[Tiger Fan]

I win the Mega Millions jackpot, I'm flying the GMTAN down to NOLA for Krita's housewarming party:01, 14, 29, 44, 52 MB 41

 

[charvik]

also- question for proninjawas there a decisive moment when you knew you had moved from being a more hobbyist style amateur ninja to a full a pro ninja? was there an awards ceremony? chicken salad sammiches?

I always just thought he was in favor of ninjas

Well that makes a lot of sense.If this is case, then when did you feel as if you needed to move from a tacitly supportive position in favor of ninjas to a more dynamic proactive ninja message.For me, it was when I stumbled across this site more than a decade ago. I even posted a link to it on the old yeller board.

 

[Abraham]

Stu - frightened rabbit at Trees on April 15 (it's a Saturday!!). Not sold out. Wtf?

Somehow that slid under the radar until yesterday. We bought tickets last night. It probably will sell out soon.

Think ill buy a couple myself on the chance I can make it. I'm late to the hipster party but have been listening to the new album a lot lately.

 

[strykerpks]

It occurs to me that these two, back-to-back posts are the GMTAN in a nutshell.

I appreciate it guys. I've had to remind myself a few times I'm having a conversation with the heroin. He'd actually been off heroin for over a year, but he'd been on suboxone, wasn't able to get that from his doc anymore, and started using heroin instead. The good news is he's off suboxone, now we just need to get him off the heroin. Talked with a different friend (another multiple inpatient who used to rent a room from me) who knows the guy last night, and her response was "XXXX is still alive? That surprises me. We had to stop hanging out because he couldn't stop using." That was depressing.

Here's one more thing for you to remember. For you, the (mostly) normal non-addict, things will be better when your friend quits. However, this is an oversimplification and is just not the case at all. Anecdote:I started drinking regularly when I was 14. When I was 16, I was a full blow alcoholic, drinking a lot every day. No one noticed because I could read people, could lie, and could crush any high school or standardized test I was given. When I was 17, I was a school valedictorian and at Stanford on scholarship for engineering. By the time I was 20, I was living in a trailer on the Stanford campus, spending every night in the Rodin sculpture garden, trying to drink one more shot than the day before, without puking. I wanted to die. It was leaving las vegas, years before the movie. Within 6 months, I was a homeless dropout sleeping under buildings, cut off from parents and stealing food. Yeah, I'm that jackass that got into a good school and somehow couldn't finish. The kicker of it is, I became homeless after I STOPPED drinking. Everyone thinks that you are fixed once you stop the substance. However, that is nonsense.All the cessation of substance does is that it allows you the opportunity to discover why your life was so void/meaningless that you slipped into oblivion. Now, you have to do the real heavy living, trying to fabricate a new foreign life with enough short moments of happiness/ joy in the world that you disdained so much that you opted out in the first place. You probably aren't wired exactly right, or you wouldn't have found yourself here in the first place.I lost a ton of friends, and those that stood by me all said at some point: "You know, you were much more pleasant as an alcoholic. You really are just a mean **** now."I abused my new found need to express myself in order to keep from getting bottled up. I vented and broke things and people. It wasn't until I started redefining myself by what I could do, as opposed to what I could no longer do, that I chance at a life not made unmanageable by alcohol. Even then, in hard times, like break ups, my dad's death, my wife's miscarriage- it is hard to walk the path. Real hard.So, for you, and good bless you- you are trying to get your buddy in a clinic. However, the real work hasn't even started. He has to build, from zero, a life better worth living sober. And for people who have addictive ersonalities and diminished capabilities for joy, that is some hard #### to manage.

Dana Delany is still hot as hell.

Followed by Frosty's post and you hit the nail on the head

 

[shuke]

Most of these zombie nerds in the Walking Dead thread don't seem to appreciate my work in there.

Needs more subtlety.

 

[shuke]

What was the name of that strip club in Heyward, WI?The one where shuke fell in love...

Phipps?

Good pancakes there

And here I was thinking Shuke fell in love with a stripper.

I think he's talking about boobs.

 

[shuke]

Enjoy sleeping in a RudePuddle, SLB.

 

[shuke]

One negative about that hotel is the checkout process is a pain for some reason. Seems like they are really slow so the lines always back up at the front desk around check out time.

Is it 1982 already?

 

[shuke]

I just hope the animal didn't skeet on the floor.

Pretty much all surfaces of any hotel room you've ever been in have been skeeted on.

 

[shuke]

Other random stuff:Wife and I hung out and got day-drunk with a couple that we are friends with. We started talking about a female friend of theirs that the wife and I have met 5 or 6 times. We'll call this person "Mary". Mary is 42, a school teacher, and never been married. She's rather nerdy but we'd always see her at the bar(s) whenever my friend's band would be playing. We'd never seen her with a guy and never heard about her having a boyfriend or even a date. Anyway turns out that Mary was a virgin up until about 6 months ago. Yes, she lost her virginity at age 42. She's not too terrible looking. I mean she's not hot by any means but she isn't totally horrific. It just blew me away.

Let's get some pics going here. This is fascinating and arousing.

 

[shuke]

I also went to law school in NYC. GM's assumptions here are more in keeping with what I saw happening. Can we get to the part where we post pictures of ourselves in college and law school rather than high school now? I was much better looking then.

College? This about sums it up.

My link

 

[shuke]

i ####### hate doing taxes

If you can't handle it with turbotax, pay an accountant.

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Went with Tax Act this year. Feeling good about this.

 

[shuke]

Interviews Monday and Tuesday. Not with my top two choices ( two pre ipo software companies) but ill take it.

If you get nervous, just picture shuke in his underwear

Let me know if you need a photo.

 

[Frostillicus]

I'm a turbo tax guy

 

[Good Posting Judge]

For me, the whole AA thing has never worked.

You're not trying to limp in with them, are you?My link

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Most of these zombie nerds in the Walking Dead thread don't seem to appreciate my work in there.

Needs more subtlety.

Serious question: Should I actually watch an episode, so I can be misinformed in a dumb way?

 

[Frostillicus]

Most of these zombie nerds in the Walking Dead thread don't seem to appreciate my work in there.

Needs more subtlety.

Serious question: Should I actually watch an episode, so I can be misinformed in a dumb way?

I was going to say no, but actually this is genius. I just can't decide if it would be better for you to watch a new one or an old one.

 

[Britney Spears]

Went with Tax Act this year. Feeling good about this.

I've used Tax Act for 4 years I think and it's been good.

 

[shuke]

My notebook is horrible...but how long have you been sober?

If you define sober as alcohol free- almost 22 years. If you define it as substance free, about 4 days.

gotcha. So alcohol is the only thing that you're "addicted" to...or what?

Alcohol is the only thing that I dream about. I can eat chicken marsala and feel the wine shooting through me. It is like a spark, a fire and there is no dabbling in that fire. I want more and more and more.I often wonder, after all these years, after all this discipline I've learned, after all the times I've said "no, not this time" if I could manage drinking again. The arrogant part of me- which is huge- believes I could. But there is a small part of me, the poker player who knows that 22-1 shots come in once every 22 times, that I might not have it in me. That I might just be broken when it comes to alcohol.If that's the case, then I am risking throwing away everything: my wife, my kids, my job- my life that I've so hard to build, just to taste the fire one more time. When I get to that conclusion, and I always eventually do, I decide to hold off on drinking again, at least for today.For me, the whole AA thing has never worked. I went to meetings, at first, but I felt that people were just replacing drinking with coffee, cigarettes and AA. I didn't want to recover anything, I needed to make something new. I was defensive and petulant, but all I heard was' Poor me, and then this happened, poor me" and I was like- Poor me- you can just pour me a drink, cause you people are killing me. Still, I am happy for that one day at a time mantra, cause that helps me keep it all together.

Stay strong, brother.

 

[shuke]

Went with Tax Act this year. Feeling good about this.

"Feeling good" how?

 

[shuke]

Most of these zombie nerds in the Walking Dead thread don't seem to appreciate my work in there.

Needs more subtlety.

Serious question: Should I actually watch an episode, so I can be misinformed in a dumb way?

If you want to be really dedicated to the shtick, sure. Zubaz pants line had my crying.

 

[Limp Ditka]

My notebook is horrible...but how long have you been sober?

If you define sober as alcohol free- almost 22 years. If you define it as substance free, about 4 days.

gotcha. So alcohol is the only thing that you're "addicted" to...or what?

Alcohol is the only thing that I dream about. I can eat chicken marsala and feel the wine shooting through me. It is like a spark, a fire and there is no dabbling in that fire. I want more and more and more.I often wonder, after all these years, after all this discipline I've learned, after all the times I've said "no, not this time" if I could manage drinking again. The arrogant part of me- which is huge- believes I could. But there is a small part of me, the poker player who knows that 22-1 shots come in once every 22 times, that I might not have it in me. That I might just be broken when it comes to alcohol.If that's the case, then I am risking throwing away everything: my wife, my kids, my job- my life that I've so hard to build, just to taste the fire one more time. When I get to that conclusion, and I always eventually do, I decide to hold off on drinking again, at least for today.For me, the whole AA thing has never worked. I went to meetings, at first, but I felt that people were just replacing drinking with coffee, cigarettes and AA. I didn't want to recover anything, I needed to make something new. I was defensive and petulant, but all I heard was' Poor me, and then this happened, poor me" and I was like- Poor me- you can just pour me a drink, cause you people are killing me. Still, I am happy for that one day at a time mantra, cause that helps me keep it all together.

Stay strong, brother.

This. It's a nasty diseaseMy dad died from the stuff. He passed when I was still an infant, so don't really know what he went through, but from the second hand accounts I've been given about my father, I'd imagine it was much like you described, rabid. And as a guy that loves to knock down his share of libations, I can honestly say that I never truly needed one. I used to feel this way about smoking, but was able to kick it. And I have to admit that's much easier to maintain now a days. Especially in Illinois where if you smoke you're worse than Hitler.

 

[Bogart]

Lisa Loeb on Conan. Still after all these years.