GM's thread about nothing (68 Viewers)

[Aaron Rudnicki]

Drunk

 

[Crazy Canuck]

Bill - step back buddy. It's not so bad in here. Kind of like any bar that has funnies, rowdies, and morons. But it's our bar and our crew.

needs fleshing out, imo

"Some of us fit more than one category." Better?

Hello, exactly.Many of us are our funniest when we're rowdy morons.

So let me get this straight. Uruk gets upset about some fishing (on such subject, I tend to agree with him more than disagree), and he takes it out on Tanner, then tells us he's handing over his keys to the only two guys on board likely to kick the bucket before him. Do I have that right?

Woa, woa, woa. I've been powerskimming this place lately and just caught up. Uruk, I don't know you well like many others here, but Tanner is Tanner and taking anything outside the GMTAN too seriously is never a good thing, IMO. Take a break, take a breath, and get your butt back in here.

That might've been the first BostonFred Block of Text I've made it through in years, and even when I'm discussed explicitly, it was still a struggle to make it through. Now I know how my cats feel when I try to talk to them.

You've come a long way from when you were zartan's lapdog. Now you're a #### to people all by yourself.

I'm going to go out on a limb without checking in with Zartan, but I think you should consider taking your own life. Seriously.But would anyone be able to make it through the suicide note?

I may be the Anti-Pickles of notebooking, but even I know these two have a long standing feud. Take it som:e:where else, fellas. Stop mucking up the bar with your bile. Someone needs to give Homer mod powers here so he can play GMTAN bouncer.

 

[phishphan]

I'll probably lose my GMTAN card (if I ever had one), but I don't quite understand the whole "I'm gonna dive into a thread I know nothing about and try to fish some poor schmuck" thing. Some of it is funny, but most seems like someone's trying too hard and running back to tell his/her friends how much hilarity ensued.Look, there's no one ever who comes across as more pretentious than I do. But "pretentious" and "mean" are 2 different things, and I think "mean" is the goal of some of the thread-raiders.This post won't change anything and will probably do more harm than good, but #### it - stop trying to be funnier/smarter than the world please.

If you're talking about Truck in the Walking Dead thread, you're way off, buddy. It's hilarious.But if you're talking about Tanner in every other TV thread, I agree. It's old.

Thanks. Fassbender was in that movie "Shame" about sex addiction. It's pretty f'ed up, and clearly NC-17.He also shows off his considerable girth in said film.

I know some guys that get upset when a dong is shown in a movie. They have to be closeted homos, right?

 

[Captain Quinoa]

bostonfred always brings combo of funny and smart that I wish to read, though.

really? smart on occasion. funny pretty rare. Halley's comet and Earf cross paths more frequently than funny bf and smart bf.

 

[shuke]

All kinds of serious business in here.

 

[Bogart]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

 

[krista4]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

PJs? Introduce her to Guster.

 

[Bogart]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

PJs? Introduce her to Guster.

 

[rabidfireweasel]

Saturday in the RFW house usually involves cooking up a bunch of farm bacon, sausage and my my kids drinking whole raw milk.

My 5 year old son, who is helping me make coffee, looks at the pile of pig in the big cast iron skillet, and then looks at me and says " I loved salted meats."

Great start to the day.

Edit: I am still ignoring the weird shift from GMTAN to bizarro-antagonistic GMTAN that has taken place over the past 24 hours.

:blissfullyoblivious:

 

[Guster]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

PJs? Introduce her to Guster.

I would have gotten her to send pics

 

[rabidfireweasel]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

It's posts like this that should get us back on track in here.

 

[Bogart]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

PJs? Introduce her to Guster.

I would have gotten her to send pics

Yes, yes you would.Still much to learn I have.

 

[Guster]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

Oh and Seems like a great replacement for the Wiccan

 

[Guster]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

PJs? Introduce her to Guster.

I would have gotten her to send pics

Yes, yes you would.Still much to learn I have.

No, it just means you're classier and a nicer guy than me

 

[Crazy Canuck]

bostonfred always brings combo of funny and smart that I wish to read, though.

really? smart on occasion. funny pretty rare. Halley's comet and Earf cross paths more frequently than funny bf and smart bf.

Respectfully disagree. That guy has made me lose it on occasion. The GM-dopamine post awhile back was legendary funny.

 

[Crazy Canuck]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

It's posts like this that should get us back on track in here.

It's like we're watching Fish and Guster's padawan learner out on his first mission. May the force be with you, Bogart, and your lightsaber strong.

 

[urbanhack]

i'm in love w/ bostonfred

 

[Captain Quinoa]

i'm in love w/ bostonfred

shocking

 

[bentley]

Taking the bentleyboys to the fair/rodeo in a few minutes. Expect Facebooking.

Todays trip is a counterbalance to the Symphony last night. The main artist was a harp soloist. I'm pretty sure that the harp sucks. Even with the free seats up front we left at intermission. I think Angrywife fell asleep at one point but considering that the average attendee age was Tanner+, I don't think she was alone.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

Will your couplings eventually take place indoors, or will you be outside in a shed like Zooks?

 

[Mr. Pickles]

Drunk

Can't be. Not enough misspellings.

 

[Bogart]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

It's posts like this that should get us back on track in here.

It's like we're watching Fish and Guster's padawan learner out on his first mission. May the force be with you, Bogart, and your lightsaber strong.

Don't forget to mention Obi-Stu Kenobi and Homerbacca.

Taking the bentleyboys to the fair/rodeo in a few minutes. Expect Facebooking.Todays trip is a counterbalance to the Symphony last night. The main artist was a harp soloist. I'm pretty sure that the harp sucks. Even with the free seats up front we left at intermission. I think Angrywife fell asleep at one point but considering that the average attendee age was Tanner+, I don't think she was alone.

Big fan of bentley Facebooking.

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

Will your couplings eventually take place indoors, or will you be outside in a shed like Zooks?

I have a lean-to shanty on order from eBay. Should be here anytime.

 

[Crazy Canuck]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB.

Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."

Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

It's posts like this that should get us back on track in here.

It's like we're watching Fish and Guster's padawan learner out on his first mission. May the force be with you, Bogart, and your lightsaber strong.

Don't forget to mention Obi-Stu Kenobi and Homerbacca.

I don't know why, but

 

[Crazy Canuck]

Drunk

Can't be. Not enough misspellings.

Clearly fake.

 

[Crazy Canuck]

I am immensely proud that my son taught himself to play the Star Wars theme on a kazoo.

It's like there's hope for the future generation.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

I am immensely proud that my son taught himself to play the Star Wars theme on a kazoo. It's like there's hope for the future generation.

I'm intrigued to see what my not-yet-born son makes of Episode 7 when it comes out, moreso than seeing the movie itself.I heard they're bringing back the original cast. Yikes.

 

[Limp Ditka]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB.

Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."

Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

It's posts like this that should get us back on track in here.

It's like we're watching Fish and Guster's padawan learner out on his first mission. May the force be with you, Bogart, and your lightsaber strong.

Don't forget to mention Obi-Stu Kenobi and Homerbacca.

I don't know why, but

Waaaaaaaaaaaaa(hic)aaaaaa

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB.

Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."

Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

It's posts like this that should get us back on track in here.

It's like we're watching Fish and Guster's padawan learner out on his first mission. May the force be with you, Bogart, and your lightsaber strong.

Don't forget to mention Obi-Stu Kenobi and Homerbacca.

I don't know why, but

Waaaaaaaaaaaaa(hic)aaaaaa

 

[-fish-]

Watching my daughter's third grade basketball. With a minute and a half left, it's 3-1. And there's another game in an hour.

 

[strykerpks]

Waaaaaaaaaaaaa(hic)aaaaaa

Watching my daughter's third grade basketball. With a minute and a half left, it's 3-1. And there's another game in an hour.

They playing the Wisconsin Badgers?

 

[Captain Quinoa]

girls basketball should be illegal

 

[BRONG]

Your winner of the 139th Kentucky Derby . . . FLASHBACK.

You already told me to bet on astrovan or some such.

Omega Star? Yeah, he runs against Flashback today -- big race for both. Another horse I had was Major Affair, who was a shot in the dark @ 150 - 1 and is done...so goes the Derby. I think there's 4 I have money on, Treasury Bill being the other. Of them, Flashback has really emerged and is working like a monster. Today's race will tell a lot; could easily be the Derby favorite by the end of the day.

 

[Guster]

I think this thread needs to get back to doing what it does best... Shot videos!

 

[Guster]

Your winner of the 139th Kentucky Derby . . . FLASHBACK.

You already told me to bet on astrovan or some such.

Omega Star? Yeah, he runs against Flashback today -- big race for both. Another horse I had was Major Affair, who was a shot in the dark @ 150 - 1 and is done...so goes the Derby. I think there's 4 I have money on, Treasury Bill being the other. Of them, Flashback has really emerged and is working like a monster. Today's race will tell a lot; could easily be the Derby favorite by the end of the day.

I've tailed you on all of of these. Hopefully one wins it :confetti:

 

[T Bell]

Buddy of mine set up a porn filter for his computer at home so his kid couldn't/wouldn't watch porn (12 years old). My wife gets word of it, and asked him to set it up at our house. So great, now I get a "blocked domain" message whenever I try to go to, ah, alternative websites. For the love of christ. So my options are to get my porn from my tiny Samsung phone, or to ask my buddy how to get around the porn blocker so I can watch porn. Not really something I want to have to ask him how to do.#### it. I'm going to bed.

Everytime you're horny, bug the #### out of your wife for sex. In no time you'll have that Admin password provided to you.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Buddy of mine set up a porn filter for his computer at home so his kid couldn't/wouldn't watch porn (12 years old). My wife gets word of it, and asked him to set it up at our house. So great, now I get a "blocked domain" message whenever I try to go to, ah, alternative websites. For the love of christ. So my options are to get my porn from my tiny Samsung phone, or to ask my buddy how to get around the porn blocker so I can watch porn. Not really something I want to have to ask him how to do.#### it. I'm going to bed.

Go old school and get some Hustlers? Remember the days when pics of nude women were a valuable commodity.

 

[Abraham]

girls basketball should be illegal

Perhaps the hottest physical specimen I ever dated was a 5'10 blonde college basketball player. She really wanted me to give her the loving right up until I told her Kara Walters looked like a horse and the uconn women's team was taking itself too seriously. Never heard from her again.

 

[T Bell]

What the #### is a fassbender?

Hunky, German actor that was in that crappy Tarantino movie where they kill Hitler.

I thought it was a guitar.

 

[T Bell]

Penis

Balls

&

Jizz

Oh my!

 

[Crazy Canuck]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB.

Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."

Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

It's posts like this that should get us back on track in here.

It's like we're watching Fish and Guster's padawan learner out on his first mission. May the force be with you, Bogart, and your lightsaber strong.

Don't forget to mention Obi-Stu Kenobi and Homerbacca.

I don't know why, but

Waaaaaaaaaaaaa(hic)aaaaaa

I can totally see Chewie pouring a beer over his own head in a cantina and screaming "Waaaaaaaaa!!" (translation: "I don't give a ####!")

 

[T Bell]

I am immensely proud that my son taught himself to play the Star Wars theme on a kazoo. It's like there's hope for the future generation.

Can you really "play" a kazoo? At best, don't you really hum a kazoo? You play it about as much as you "play" a fart.

 

[T Bell]

girls basketball players should be illegal

fixed

 

[Bogart]

I am immensely proud that my son taught himself to play the Star Wars theme on a kazoo.

It's like there's hope for the future generation.

Can you really "play" a kazoo? At best, don't you really hum a kazoo? You play it about as much as you "play" a fart.

I would pay good money to see someone fart the Star Wars theme.

 

[Gadzooks]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

Will your couplings eventually take place indoors, or will you be outside in a shed like Zooks?

It was a garage not a shed. I'm not a hillbilly.

 

[T Bell]

I am immensely proud that my son taught himself to play the Star Wars theme on a kazoo.

It's like there's hope for the future generation.

Can you really "play" a kazoo? At best, don't you really hum a kazoo? You play it about as much as you "play" a fart.

I would pay good money to see someone fart the Star Wars theme.

The Imperial March would be more realistic, the notes being predominantly in the lower register.

 

[Gadzooks]

GMTAN needs Evilgrin. Please read the last page of that thread about why people in my office wonder why they are fat. I'd try to link it, but there's a better chance of GM installing Netflix by himself.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB. Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

Will your couplings eventually take place indoors, or will you be outside in a shed like Zooks?

It was a garage not a shed. I'm not a hillbilly.

Yesterday's garage is today's shed is tomorrow's lean-to.

 

[Crazy Canuck]

I am immensely proud that my son taught himself to play the Star Wars theme on a kazoo.

It's like there's hope for the future generation.

Can you really "play" a kazoo? At best, don't you really hum a kazoo? You play it about as much as you "play" a fart.

I would pay good money to see someone fart the Star Wars theme.

The Imperial March would be more realistic, the notes being predominantly in the lower register.

We're working on that one. Star Wars works great too though. Star Wars! Everything Star Wars! Everything Star Wars! Dun-da-daaa-da!

 

[T Bell]

Heading out on a date with "the non-reader" who just texted me that her cousin in Mexico "stole one of her poses" on the FB.

Maybe this girl will like PB&J for dinner.

OK, I figured out last night, that right now, this is exactly the kind of girl that I need to be dating right now. I don't have to think or even really try hard. Open the car door, suggest the restaurant, and I'm suddenly the greatest guy ever. I did teach her how to use chopsticks last night, so I have that going for me.What is new for me, is I have never dated a drinker before. Got a text this morning, "I'm only in my bra right now. Guess I couldn't find my pjs last night."

Yeah, I can work with this for a while.

No way!

 

[Guster]

GMTAN needs Evilgrin. Please read the last page of that thread about why people in my office wonder why they are fat. I'd try to link it, but there's a better chance of GM installing Netflix by himself.

There might not be a more consistent poster than EG. Seems like he's always bringing the funny