GM's thread about nothing (56 Viewers)

[St. Louis Bob]

I think this Manning is up to something.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Had a little old man walk in tonight and sidle up to the bar. After a few drinks, he opened up and talked about how he and his (deceased) wife would come in every week for dinner, drinks and then a movie. I listened to a few good stories he told while I was working. At the end of his night, he cashed out and left two envelopes. One was marked for me personally, the other was for management. I opened mine and there was $500. I was floored. His tab for the night was $40. I obviously asked what was in the other envelope and the manager told me it was a note telling him that the old man had been coming in for years and never had anyone actually care enough to listen to him.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Had a little old man walk in tonight and sidle up to the bar. After a few drinks, he opened up and talked about how he and his (deceased) wife would come in every week for dinner, drinks and then a movie. I listened to a few good stories he told while I was working. At the end of his night, he cashed out and left two envelopes. One was marked for me personally, the other was for management. I opened mine and there was $500. I was floored. His tab for the night was $40. I obviously asked what was in the other envelope and the manager told me it was a note telling him that the old man had been coming in for years and never had anyone actually care enough to listen to him.

How long have you worked there?

Years. Why?

OOPS

 

[St. Louis Bob]

On my walk this morning some d-bag driving a BMW didn't use his blinker and rolled a red light as I was crossing. Good thing there was a cop behind him because I made a twirling motion with my finger over my head and he pulled him over. He was writing a ticket by the time I caught up with them a little down the road.

 

[Captain Quinoa]

So my brother is changing jobs and he just sent me and a few other people his "personal" email to use instead of his old work one. Said email address includes his name, a year, and "69."

Please advice me on how to shame him properly.

My wife uses 69 in her passwords a lot. She claims it's for her birth year but I think our daughter is skeptical.

 

[CGRdrJoe]

Is this the new chat? Is slowerde in here?

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

Homer's real name is Paul.

WTF? Stays here down?

Aaron Paul.

Wish I was that cool.

So do we. So do we.

 

[T Bell]

So my brother is changing jobs and he just sent me and a few other people his "personal" email to use instead of his old work one. Said email address includes his name, a year, and "69."

Please advice me on how to shame him properly.

Ask him if he's clean shaven, because otherwise that's rude.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Is this the new chat? Is slowerde in here?

Pretty much.

Not that I'm aware of. But there are about 7 iterations of The Imp.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

On my walk this morning some d-bag driving a BMW didn't use his blinker and rolled a red light as I was crossing. Good thing there was a cop behind him because I made a twirling motion with my finger over my head and he pulled him over. He was writing a ticket by the time I caught up with them a little down the road.

Did you yell out "Nice Nazi car!"?

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Is this the new chat? Is slowerde in here?

Welcome to 2000 pages ago.

So my brother is changing jobs and he just sent me and a few other people his "personal" email to use instead of his old work one. Said email address includes his name, a year, and "69."

Please advice me on how to shame him properly.

ZAP

 

[St. Louis Bob]

On my walk this morning some d-bag driving a BMW didn't use his blinker and rolled a red light as I was crossing. Good thing there was a cop behind him because I made a twirling motion with my finger over my head and he pulled him over. He was writing a ticket by the time I caught up with them a little down the road.

Did you yell out "Nice Nazi car!"?

No I yelled "Hey Himmler! Missed one!".

 

[Thorn]

Is this the new chat? Is slowerde in here?

Welcome to 2000 pages ago.

So my brother is changing jobs and he just sent me and a few other people his "personal" email to use instead of his old work one. Said email address includes his name, a year, and "69."

Please advice me on how to shame him properly.

ZAP

I don't get it.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

SloMo

For you stoners

I hope to god this is real

 

[T Bell]

I hope to god this is real

 

[General Malaise]

K4, the headline of this article might be suggesting a place for your new home: my link

Jenny should probably effort a little more to make friends. Jeez. Sounds like a real termagant.

 

[strykerpks]

I hope to god this is real

Yup

 

[General Malaise]

PAID VS UNPAID - CHECK FOR ACCURACY:

Paid:

Homer's Team

Fish Stryker

YSR (shorted me 10, promises to 'make up for it')

K4 et al

StuNi

IgnoAbe

Tiger Bags

TreDrfit

SLB

Frost/Tanner = 49.3% paid, Tanner promising to telegraph a money gram

UNPAID

Cosjobs Ninja

Guster Zooks

Thorn Gart

Check is in the mail like I tole you!

Ahead or behind of the Allagash White?

Maybe you don't deserve any Allagash, did you ever think of that?

Well of course I don't. Combined with your obvious disdain for me, I was flummoxed with the offer to begin with. Just get your check into me, two socks.

 

[General Malaise]

So my brother is changing jobs and he just sent me and a few other people his "personal" email to use instead of his old work one. Said email address includes his name, a year, and "69."

Please advice me on how to shame him properly.

Promise him a six pack of the best beer on earth and then continue to say its in the mail for months?

 

[T Bell]

I hope to god this is real

Yup

Always a good plan to try to escape from the fire when it's you that's burning.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

K4, the headline of this article might be suggesting a place for your new home: my link

Jenny should probably effort a little more to make friends. Jeez. Sounds like a real termagant.

Nah, Cincy's kinda like that.

 

[General Malaise]

I hope to god this is real

Yup

Well is she dead?

 

[General Malaise]

K4, the headline of this article might be suggesting a place for your new home: my link

Jenny should probably effort a little more to make friends. Jeez. Sounds like a real termagant.

Nah, Cincy's kinda like that.

Maybe if Jenny hoooooored around a bit she'd be more popular.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

K4, the headline of this article might be suggesting a place for your new home: my link

Jenny should probably effort a little more to make friends. Jeez. Sounds like a real termagant.

Nah, Cincy's kinda like that.

Maybe if Jenny hoooooored around a bit she'd be more popular.

Well, that goes without saying.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Is this the new chat? Is slowerde in here?

Welcome to 2000 pages ago.

So my brother is changing jobs and he just sent me and a few other people his "personal" email to use instead of his old work one. Said email address includes his name, a year, and "69."

Please advice me on how to shame him properly.

ZAP

I don't get it.

I don't know.

 

[Uruk-Hai]

Off to get a pedicure. My "regular" is Christina, who I'm sure was named that way in Viet Nam. So, I call today and ask for her. The lady says "she's on vacation but I will see you now". I asked what her name is. "Wendy". I laughed & she laughed. "Christina told me about you, be here in 30 minutes".

Christina had asked me awhile ago if I like Asian women (& always asks if I have a GF). My response was "those with ######s". Oh, how we laughed. I think she's trying to set me up with Wendy.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

You know what's awesome about my job? Selling is really tough and then once you do, people feel like they can pay you whenever they want. Then when you have the nerve to contact them the hundredth time about it they feel like they can yell at you and act like it isn't any big deal owing a couple of grand. They're a big shot. No time to #### with such a small amount.

At least back in the day I could threaten violence. Nobody dared yell at me then. I really need to reevaluate my life.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Maybe I should move to Nicaragua. I hear that's a cool place to live.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

This year

You know what's awesome about my job? Selling is really tough and then once you do, people feel like they can pay you whenever they want. Then when you have the nerve to contact them the hundredth time about it they feel like they can yell at you and act like it isn't any big deal owing a couple of grand. They're a big shot. No time to #### with such a small amount.

At least back in the day I could threaten violence. Nobody dared yell at me then. I really need to reevaluate my life.

Have you tried crying? Or offering blow jobs?

 

[rabidfireweasel]

After some months off of just being a dad I am back in the studio.

Here is a piece I finished that has sweet j as a model

https://picasaweb.google.com/114934453803535872362/SweetJPage

 

[St. Louis Bob]

This year

You know what's awesome about my job? Selling is really tough and then once you do, people feel like they can pay you whenever they want. Then when you have the nerve to contact them the hundredth time about it they feel like they can yell at you and act like it isn't any big deal owing a couple of grand. They're a big shot. No time to #### with such a small amount.

At least back in the day I could threaten violence. Nobody dared yell at me then. I really need to reevaluate my life.

Have you tried crying? Or offering blow jobs?

POW!

Can't even copy at current url. Skip to the 40 second mark for maximum hilarity. I feel like Uruk trying to quote people.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

After some months off of just being a dad I am back in the studio.

Here is a piece I finished that has sweet j as a model

https://picasaweb.google.com/114934453803535872362/SweetJPage

Awesome

 

[rabidfireweasel]

And the unialias page

https://picasaweb.google.com/114934453803535872362/UniAliasPage

 

[strykerpks]

I hope to god this is real

Yup

Well is she dead?

Sadly yes, but not from the fire. She got hit by a bus on the way to the hospital

 

[St. Louis Bob]

And the unialias page

https://picasaweb.google.com/114934453803535872362/UniAliasPage

I just wish I could print as good as you.

 

[T Bell]

This year

You know what's awesome about my job? Selling is really tough and then once you do, people feel like they can pay you whenever they want. Then when you have the nerve to contact them the hundredth time about it they feel like they can yell at you and act like it isn't any big deal owing a couple of grand. They're a big shot. No time to #### with such a small amount.

At least back in the day I could threaten violence. Nobody dared yell at me then. I really need to reevaluate my life.

Have you tried crying? Or offering blow jobs?

POW!

Can't even copy at current url. Skip to the 40 second mark for maximum hilarity. I feel like Uruk trying to quote people.

 

[T Bell]

I hope to god this is real

Yup

Well is she dead?

Sadly yes, but not from the fire. She got hit by a bus on the way to the hospital

She should have put on her seatbelt but she was twerking.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

File this under "things I really wish I didn't know about"

We have a new dean on campus this year. She used to be a teacher at one of our elementary schools. We'll call her Blondie. About a year and a half ago there was a pretty big scandal involving this new dean.

It was a big enough deal that very few people know exactly what happened. And an email was sent out stating basically "do not gossip or repeat rumors unless you want to be part of a deposition/investigation."

From what I could piece together is that Blondie was romantically involved with her principal (they were both married at the time). No idea how this affair came to light but it did. Of course neither would admit it nor was there any evidence. Because of the rumors etc Blondie filed one of them there "hostile work environment" thingies. Eventually both Blondie and the principal were reassigned to different schools.

Fast-forward and she is now a dean on my campus.

And she's hot.

She's also very nice a professional. But all I think about is how she is a naughty, naughty girl.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

File this under "things I really wish I didn't know about"

We have a new dean on campus this year. She used to be a teacher at one of our elementary schools. We'll call her Blondie. About a year and a half ago there was a pretty big scandal involving this new dean.

It was a big enough deal that very few people know exactly what happened. And an email was sent out stating basically "do not gossip or repeat rumors unless you want to be part of a deposition/investigation."

From what I could piece together is that Blondie was romantically involved with her principal (they were both married at the time). No idea how this affair came to light but it did. Of course neither would admit it nor was there any evidence. Because of the rumors etc Blondie filed one of them there "hostile work environment" thingies. Eventually both Blondie and the principal were reassigned to different schools.

Fast-forward and she is now a dean on my campus.

And she's hot.

She's also very nice a professional. But all I think about is how she is a naughty, naughty girl.

Install a spy camera in the women's john.

 

[Limp Ditka]

Maybe the two of you should sit down and have a chat over a non non-alcoholic beer.

 

[Limp Ditka]

and what Bob said.

 

[krista4]

K4, the headline of this article might be suggesting a place for your new home: my link

Jenny should probably effort a little more to make friends. Jeez. Sounds like a real termagant.

Of all the people here, GM was not the one I would have thought would use a word I had to look up. (No offense, GB.)

 

[UOFI_316]

File this under "things I really wish I didn't know about"

We have a new dean on campus this year. She used to be a teacher at one of our elementary schools. We'll call her Blondie. About a year and a half ago there was a pretty big scandal involving this new dean.

It was a big enough deal that very few people know exactly what happened. And an email was sent out stating basically "do not gossip or repeat rumors unless you want to be part of a deposition/investigation."

From what I could piece together is that Blondie was romantically involved with her principal (they were both married at the time). No idea how this affair came to light but it did. Of course neither would admit it nor was there any evidence. Because of the rumors etc Blondie filed one of them there "hostile work environment" thingies. Eventually both Blondie and the principal were reassigned to different schools.

Fast-forward and she is now a dean on my campus.

And she's hot.

She's also very nice a professional. But all I think about is how she is a naughty, naughty girl.

Do you have another "teacher tree" or whatever the hell it was called last year?

 

[krista4]

K4, the headline of this article might be suggesting a place for your new home: my link

Jenny should probably effort a little more to make friends. Jeez. Sounds like a real termagant.

Of all the people here, GM was not the one I would have thought would use a word I had to look up. (No offense, GB.)

Oh, and great link Guster. I'll cross Cincy off the list.

 

[UniAlias]

And the unialias page

https://picasaweb.google.com/114934453803535872362/UniAliasPage

 

[Homer J Simpson]

You know what's awesome about my job? Selling is really tough and then once you do, people feel like they can pay you whenever they want. Then when you have the nerve to contact them the hundredth time about it they feel like they can yell at you and act like it isn't any big deal owing a couple of grand. They're a big shot. No time to #### with such a small amount.

At least back in the day I could threaten violence. Nobody dared yell at me then. I really need to reevaluate my life.

You wanna get in with me and GM on our "illicit services to rich guys" business?

 

[rabidfireweasel]

And the unialias pagehttps://picasaweb.google.com/114934453803535872362/UniAliasPage

Taken from the coshole files

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

File this under "things I really wish I didn't know about"

We have a new dean on campus this year. She used to be a teacher at one of our elementary schools. We'll call her Blondie. About a year and a half ago there was a pretty big scandal involving this new dean.

It was a big enough deal that very few people know exactly what happened. And an email was sent out stating basically "do not gossip or repeat rumors unless you want to be part of a deposition/investigation."

From what I could piece together is that Blondie was romantically involved with her principal (they were both married at the time). No idea how this affair came to light but it did. Of course neither would admit it nor was there any evidence. Because of the rumors etc Blondie filed one of them there "hostile work environment" thingies. Eventually both Blondie and the principal were reassigned to different schools.

Fast-forward and she is now a dean on my campus.

And she's hot.

She's also very nice a professional. But all I think about is how she is a naughty, naughty girl.

Do you have another "teacher tree" or whatever the hell it was called last year?

The one from last year is still up. All of the photos I added are still there.

 

[Uruk-Hai]

It appears I've fallen into "Days Of Our Lives" territory.

Wendy-the-Pedicurist says she's Christina-my-Pedicurist's sister. Wendy proceeds to tell me that Christina is addicted to gambling (I can believe this, as most of what Christina talks about is going to Atlantic City). According to Wendy - the sister, mind you, and who doesn't know me from Adam - Christina spent a week in AC and lost $6k a day, to the point where she can't afford day care for her kid and can't afford to drive to work. I asked where Christina's husband (who also worked at the salon) Danny (hahaha) was and all she did was shake her head.

Random converation points....

Wendy: "do you live close?"

Me: "yeah"

Her: "Me too!"

Wendy (while massaging my feet and calves): "Christina gambles too much"

Me :"aah"

Wendy: "She's no good"

Me (thinking what the hell has Christina told this woman about me): "aah"

Wendy: "Christina tells me you have a girlfriend"

Me: "That was last year and I don't anymore"

Wendy: "Good. Christina said she was no good for you" (she was fine; she went with me there and was always nice).

Me: "aah"

I'm pretty stupid when it comes to women (& just about anything else), but this has got "anchor-onto-a-fairly-succesful-guy" written all over it. Both are attractive (though they don't look like sisters) - pretty faces, slender, boob jobs.

 

[Disco Stu]

It appears I've fallen into "Days Of Our Lives" territory.

Wendy-the-Pedicurist says she's Christina-my-Pedicurist's sister. Wendy proceeds to tell me that Christina is addicted to gambling (I can believe this, as most of what Christina talks about is going to Atlantic City). According to Wendy - the sister, mind you, and who doesn't know me from Adam - Christina spent a week in AC and lost $6k a day, to the point where she can't afford day care for her kid and can't afford to drive to work. I asked where Christina's husband (who also worked at the salon) Danny (hahaha) was and all she did was shake her head.

Random converation points....

Wendy: "do you live close?"

Me: "yeah"

Her: "Me too!"

Wendy (while massaging my feet and calves): "Christina gambles too much"

Me :"aah"

Wendy: "She's no good"

Me (thinking what the hell has Christina told this woman about me): "aah"

Wendy: "Christina tells me you have a girlfriend"

Me: "That was last year and I don't anymore"

Wendy: "Good. Christina said she was no good for you" (she was fine; she went with me there and was always nice).

Me: "aah"

I'm pretty stupid when it comes to women (& just about anything else), but this has got "anchor-onto-a-fairly-succesful-guy" written all over it. Both are attractive (though they don't look like sisters) - pretty faces, slender, boob jobs.

I don't see the problem here GB.

Not with Wendy at least. Careful with Christina... don't want to be the next poor ******* financing an Asian friend's gambling problem. And careful with all the "aah" replies... guaranteed panty dropper.