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GM's thread about nothing (43 Viewers)

GM's so white he thinks Hee Haw is a rap group.
:lmao:
:lmao:

GM, I got Thorn's check today. I think. I actually got as far as opening the envelope but then I got distracted and left it on my desk in my office.

YES, WHY WOULD ANYONE THINK A ROAST IS A GOOD IDEA?

Is your friend Jeff Ross?
I'm a week or so behind, who are we roasting here?

Oh, you know what else can go F itself? The Great Kern County Fair. Right in its redneck mouth.

Every year I have kids missing school during the fair because they're "showing animals" for 4H. :secondjerkoffmotionoftheday: It is a pain in the ### but it has never been this bad. For some reason this year a lot of the kids think that this excuses them from doing work etc. I think it is pretty generous of me to let kids who miss a day for the fair do the work the next day. Some teachers make them do all the work ahead of time.

Bumpkin Girl: Mr. Malloy? I was at the fair late last night showing my [some stupid, filthy animal] and I didn't get a chance to finish the study guide or study. Do I still have to take the test today?

Me: Yes, you still have to take the test.

Bumpkin: Really? I don't think that's fair. [no pun intended]

Me: I'm sorry but you really do. Look, I know that 4H is a good thing and you guys learn a lot by doing it but you still have to do your school work. If I let you take the test on Monday I'd have to do the same for somebody who didn't study because of football practice or somebody who was out of town with a volleyball tournament.

Bumpkin girl pouts and takes her test.

I hope her goat or sheep or duck or whatever gets rabies.
I was at lunch with a GB today. He told me at his kid's school, they can re-take a test as many times as they want. WTMF is that all about?
I got the same offer from my 5th grade teacher. He said if I didn't quit being a smartass I could come back and retake it when I was 11. And 12. And 13.

 
I was at lunch with a GB today. He told me at his kid's school, they can re-take a test as many times as they want. WTMF is that all about?
It depends on what kind of test we're talking about here.

If it is a benchmark or competency it makes sense. Those types of test are there so you can say "every 6th grader knows how to multiply fractions" or "by the end of 8th grade every student should be able to list the rights in the First Amendment" etc. If a kid fails the test you "re-teach" and then have them take it until they pass.

For just about any other type of test multiple retakes are hippy bull####. I can see allowing one retake maybe. But after that you get what you get.

I don't allow any retakes. The day before every test I give them a study guide WHICH IS THE TEST ITSELF just without the answer choices. The exact same questions. I even put a copy of it online in case a kid is sick or loses their copy. And the kids have already answered the questions at least once on the worksheet for each section.

I can't make it any easier to prepare for one of my tests so no freaking retakes. (kids with learning disabilities excluded).

 
I got the same offer from my 5th grade teacher. He said if I didn't quit being a smartass I could come back and retake it when I was 11. And 12. And 13.
Fairly certain our teachers passed my GB's and myself so they would never have to be in the same room as us again.

I was at lunch with a GB today. He told me at his kid's school, they can re-take a test as many times as they want. WTMF is that all about?
It depends on what kind of test we're talking about here.

If it is a benchmark or competency it makes sense. Those types of test are there so you can say "every 6th grader knows how to multiply fractions" or "by the end of 8th grade every student should be able to list the rights in the First Amendment" etc. If a kid fails the test you "re-teach" and then have them take it until they pass.

For just about any other type of test multiple retakes are hippy bull####. I can see allowing one retake maybe. But after that you get what you get.

I don't allow any retakes. The day before every test I give them a study guide WHICH IS THE TEST ITSELF just without the answer choices. The exact same questions. I even put a copy of it online in case a kid is sick or loses their copy. And the kids have already answered the questions at least once on the worksheet for each section.

I can't make it any easier to prepare for one of my tests so no freaking retakes. (kids with learning disabilities excluded).
That's what is sounds like. My GB wasn't happy about it.

 
Oh, you know what else can go F itself? The Great Kern County Fair. Right in its redneck mouth.

Every year I have kids missing school during the fair because they're "showing animals" for 4H. :secondjerkoffmotionoftheday: It is a pain in the ### but it has never been this bad. For some reason this year a lot of the kids think that this excuses them from doing work etc. I think it is pretty generous of me to let kids who miss a day for the fair do the work the next day. Some teachers make them do all the work ahead of time.

Bumpkin Girl: Mr. Malloy? I was at the fair late last night showing my [some stupid, filthy animal] and I didn't get a chance to finish the study guide or study. Do I still have to take the test today?

Me: Yes, you still have to take the test.

Bumpkin: Really? I don't think that's fair. [no pun intended]

Me: I'm sorry but you really do. Look, I know that 4H is a good thing and you guys learn a lot by doing it but you still have to do your school work. If I let you take the test on Monday I'd have to do the same for somebody who didn't study because of football practice or somebody who was out of town with a volleyball tournament.

Bumpkin girl pouts and takes her test.

I hope her goat or sheep or duck or whatever gets rabies.
I don't disagree with you that they should have to still do the work on the same timeline as everyone else. But I think you are selling 4H-stuff short. Taking care of a non domestic animal takes a lot of work and patience and commitment not often found in teenagers. Making sure a pig (for example) is healthy and growing takes a heck of a lot more work than a lot of extracurricular activities that are often held in higher esteem.

 
I'm sick of being pudgy. Decided it's going to stop. So, I'm not going to eat a single thing bad for me* at all. Not at all. Half of me is excited, the other half of me wonders how long it's going to be until I binge on chicken wings.

*except for booze, but most of that will be red wine

 
Oh, you know what else can go F itself? The Great Kern County Fair. Right in its redneck mouth.

Every year I have kids missing school during the fair because they're "showing animals" for 4H. :secondjerkoffmotionoftheday: It is a pain in the ### but it has never been this bad. For some reason this year a lot of the kids think that this excuses them from doing work etc. I think it is pretty generous of me to let kids who miss a day for the fair do the work the next day. Some teachers make them do all the work ahead of time.

Bumpkin Girl: Mr. Malloy? I was at the fair late last night showing my [some stupid, filthy animal] and I didn't get a chance to finish the study guide or study. Do I still have to take the test today?

Me: Yes, you still have to take the test.

Bumpkin: Really? I don't think that's fair. [no pun intended]

Me: I'm sorry but you really do. Look, I know that 4H is a good thing and you guys learn a lot by doing it but you still have to do your school work. If I let you take the test on Monday I'd have to do the same for somebody who didn't study because of football practice or somebody who was out of town with a volleyball tournament.

Bumpkin girl pouts and takes her test.

I hope her goat or sheep or duck or whatever gets rabies.
I don't disagree with you that they should have to still do the work on the same timeline as everyone else. But I think you are selling 4H-stuff short. Taking care of a non domestic animal takes a lot of work and patience and commitment not often found in teenagers. Making sure a pig (for example) is healthy and growing takes a heck of a lot more work than a lot of extracurricular activities that are often held in higher esteem.
It seems like it could do a better job teaching them how to effectively juggle competing priorities.

 
Oh, you know what else can go F itself? The Great Kern County Fair. Right in its redneck mouth.

Every year I have kids missing school during the fair because they're "showing animals" for 4H. :secondjerkoffmotionoftheday: It is a pain in the ### but it has never been this bad. For some reason this year a lot of the kids think that this excuses them from doing work etc. I think it is pretty generous of me to let kids who miss a day for the fair do the work the next day. Some teachers make them do all the work ahead of time.

Bumpkin Girl: Mr. Malloy? I was at the fair late last night showing my [some stupid, filthy animal] and I didn't get a chance to finish the study guide or study. Do I still have to take the test today?

Me: Yes, you still have to take the test.

Bumpkin: Really? I don't think that's fair. [no pun intended]

Me: I'm sorry but you really do. Look, I know that 4H is a good thing and you guys learn a lot by doing it but you still have to do your school work. If I let you take the test on Monday I'd have to do the same for somebody who didn't study because of football practice or somebody who was out of town with a volleyball tournament.

Bumpkin girl pouts and takes her test.

I hope her goat or sheep or duck or whatever gets rabies.
Bumpkin girl is so easy.....after banging Mitch, she rode Zooks' wart covered **** until her cows came home.

*bonus points for multiple GMTAN shticks and making fun of myself all in one post. I better see a lot of likes on this post or you can all eat a wart-infested **** of one of the 80% of sexually active males that will contract HPV who should not be ashamed of getting HPV.

 
My cousin's are leaving tomorrow for Dallas tomorrow. A vendor has a luxury box for the game Sunday. What a bunch of #####. I got into the wrong business. Flooring is where it is at. I always thought people will always need office supplies but that is getting less and less true. You're always going to need carpet/tile/wood etc. Jerkfaces are all killing it to. My GB in KC sold 3 million worth just himself last month. Sheesh.

 
Never really had the courage to tell anyone this, but Zooks has given me strength. I'm pretty sure I had HPV before. I never actually got tested back then ( :bag: ), but was in a committed relationship and the girl I was seeing tested positive for it.

Maybe she was just a slut and sleeping with guys like Zooks in murky garages though.

 
Never really had the courage to tell anyone this, but Zooks has given me strength. I'm pretty sure I had HPV before. I never actually got tested back then ( :bag: ), but was in a committed relationship and the girl I was seeing tested positive for it.

Maybe she was just a slut and sleeping with guys like Zooks in murky garages though.
Nothing to be ashamed of, my possible eskimo brother.

I love you.

 
Never really had the courage to tell anyone this, but Zooks has given me strength. I'm pretty sure I had HPV before. I never actually got tested back then ( :bag: ), but was in a committed relationship and the girl I was seeing tested positive for it.

Maybe she was just a slut and sleeping with guys like Zooks in murky garages though.
Nothing to be ashamed of, my possible eskimo brother.I love you.
Hey guys! This is where the cool kids hang out, right?

 
My cousin's are leaving tomorrow for Dallas tomorrow. A vendor has a luxury box for the game Sunday. What a bunch of #####. I got into the wrong business. Flooring is where it is at. I always thought people will always need office supplies but that is getting less and less true. You're always going to need carpet/tile/wood etc. Jerkfaces are all killing it to. My GB in KC sold 3 million worth just himself last month. Sheesh.
Also, endless "do you want the carpet to match the curtains?" jokes.

 
My cousin's are leaving tomorrow for Dallas tomorrow. A vendor has a luxury box for the game Sunday. What a bunch of #####. I got into the wrong business. Flooring is where it is at. I always thought people will always need office supplies but that is getting less and less true. You're always going to need carpet/tile/wood etc. Jerkfaces are all killing it to. My GB in KC sold 3 million worth just himself last month. Sheesh.
Also, endless "do you want the carpet to match the curtains?" jokes.
My one cousin says he's sick of all the carpet groupies harassing him.
 
My other cousin's wife LOVES giving BJs. Does it on demand. I wish I was that lucky now, even more so at 63. Good looking broad too. Exercise freak, runs marathons all the time. Lucky *******.

 
Given the budget, I'd drink from now until kickoff then keep drinking. I just double checked and the vols have beaten Florida once since I met my wife. That's atrocious.

 
Anyone smart in here? I have a question - friday night probably not the best time to ask, but here goes:

Went out to dinner tonight. Bill comes after the meal listing all costs....so, after a quick double check to see everything looked about right....I look at the bottom and see:

Subtotal - $75.98

Tax - $4.96

Total - $80.94

Okay, slip my credit card in the check carrier, waitress picks it up, runs my card.

Credit card slip comes out and I get:

Amount - $73.74

Tax - $7.20

Subtotal - $80.94

Tip _________

wtf happened there?

 
Whatever happened to this thread?

Will someone please shart themselves?

I would do it, but I'm eating way too much fiber these days. :oldunsure:

 
Anyone smart in here? I have a question - friday night probably not the best time to ask, but here goes:

Went out to dinner tonight. Bill comes after the meal listing all costs....so, after a quick double check to see everything looked about right....I look at the bottom and see:

Subtotal - $75.98

Tax - $4.96

Total - $80.94

Okay, slip my credit card in the check carrier, waitress picks it up, runs my card.

Credit card slip comes out and I get:

Amount - $73.74

Tax - $7.20

Subtotal - $80.94

Tip _________

wtf happened there?
The butler kept a dollar.

 
Wife (im not married, but call her my wife since weve been dating for like 8 years) is out shopping for baptism clothes for the boys (we procrastinate and decided to get a two for one special(. She took the 2 year old with, leaving me with the 6 month old. He fell asleep so in drinking mason jars of Captain and Diet Wild Cherry Pepsi (Tanner is so old he drinks regular diet cherry Pepsi)

 
Tiger Fan said:
We're supposed to be providing me with roast material!!!!11
Call me crazy but it might help if we knew who you were roasting or something about him.
And why you're roasting him. If he's getting married, something tells me the people around here can come up with jokes for that. If he's just old, we can switch from GMjokes toTannerjokes and you can steal those.

Help us help you.
It's my friend's wife that's turning 40. But we can make fun of everyone. There's drunks, potheads, guys with 4 kids, etc

 
So I asked my son if his stomach hurt during an after school sport thing yesterday, during tae kwon do tonight, or while he was dancing around the housre tonight, and he said no. now Im' afraid he just has some occasional constipation and this is being turned into a big deal. He now is being called from his classroom to speak to the counselor at school. I'm afraid that is going to make things worse.

So he had his first official tae kwon do class tonight. Twice he came over to me asking to leave. Understandably he was a little intimidated. Most of the kids in there knew what the #### was going on, and the instructors can be somewhat difficult to understand. Luckily he stuck with it and had fun.

I'll go preemptively eat some **** now.

 
Tae kwon do can be awesome for building self esteem and individual confidence. Help him stay with it. Encourage him. He will be glad in the long run. So will you. Go bathe in rat feces.

 
So I asked my son if his stomach hurt during an after school sport thing yesterday, during tae kwon do tonight, or while he was dancing around the housre tonight, and he said no. now Im' afraid he just has some occasional constipation and this is being turned into a big deal. He now is being called from his classroom to speak to the counselor at school. I'm afraid that is going to make things worse.

So he had his first official tae kwon do class tonight. Twice he came over to me asking to leave. Understandably he was a little intimidated. Most of the kids in there knew what the #### was going on, and the instructors can be somewhat difficult to understand. Luckily he stuck with it and had fun.

I'll go preemptively eat some **** now.
Is he aware that King Kong went to Hong Kong to play ping-pong with his ding-dong? I think that's an important think to tell people from Oriental cultures.

 

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