T Bell
Footballguy
Not only are you not alone, according to Jenny McCarthy it's caused by your vaccinations.
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GM's thread about nothing (82 Viewers)
- Thread starter General Malaise
- Start date
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
bostonfred
Footballguy
Something that always bothered me about armageddon is why would they need to remote detonate the nuke just because they were out of radio range? They still had people up there. Why not have them drill as deep as possible and then blow it up? But hey, I guess they were worried that the people might die or something and not be able to detonate the thing. So sure, start the clock on that nuke. Why not. But what kind of ##### are these guys that they set the clock to three minutes instead of like four hours? If they'd done that, bruce willis doesn't have to die.
Henry Ford
Footballguy
T Bell
Footballguy
I laughed at that too.
"Then I piled as many heavy books that I don't read on top of the toilet lid and prayed the thing would just go away before my morning coffee kicked in."
Idiot Boxer
Footballguy
This is why I don't post here as much Bob. No one commented on my posting of the Mitch Hedberg link 3 hours before K4 did.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
Henry Ford
Footballguy
I wonder what the NSA does when they see that google search. "Wait, Jim, look - this guy's googling 'what do you do with a rat in your toilet?'"
Henry Ford
Footballguy
I would like to personally apologize for the way that went down.This is why I don't post here as much Bob. No one commented on my posting of the Mitch Hedberg link 3 hours before K4 did.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
Sammy3469
Footballguy
T Bell
Footballguy
"OMG - he misspelled "ratt"! He must be frantic. Now he's got to wait while the google page full of useless rock band links loads!
"
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Idiot Boxer
Footballguy
It was howling like this swirling storm insideI would like to personally apologize for the way that went down.This is why I don't post here as much Bob. No one commented on my posting of the Mitch Hedberg link 3 hours before K4 did.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
Couldn't keep it in, heaven knows I tried
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
I get ignored a lot too, but I won't let that get me down. I just keep pumping away. Pumping away.This is why I don't post here as much Bob. No one commented on my posting of the Mitch Hedberg link 3 hours before K4 did.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
Captain Quinoa
Footballguy
Captain Quinoa
Footballguy
no, it's really not.It's very much in his delivery. Much better live than reading his material.I thought Steven Wright was pretty funny too. This guy's stuff at least that I read in the link in here was like. "oh. Yeah. That's clever."
heckmanm
Footballguy
I cross-posted here from FB, but K4's was the link I saw over there. Nothing personal GB.This is why I don't post here as much Bob. No one commented on my posting of the Mitch Hedberg link 3 hours before K4 did.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
Semi-related - I need someone to write a filter for FB so I can assign nicknames to people. With a few exceptions, I have a hell of a time recognizing people here on FB (see: the fish/yogurt confusion from yesterday).
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
I'm moving to any country where you're a third world citizen.This is why I don't post here as much Bob. No one commented on my posting of the Mitch Hedberg link 3 hours before K4 did.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
They need a group for ifriends. Something that keeps Homer from seeing that I even have a niece. And Tanner from recognizing that he went to middle school with my grandma.I cross-posted here from FB, but K4's was the link I saw over there. Nothing personal GB.This is why I don't post here as much Bob. No one commented on my posting of the Mitch Hedberg link 3 hours before K4 did.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
Semi-related - I need someone to write a filter for FB so I can assign nicknames to people. With a few exceptions, I have a hell of a time recognizing people here on FB (see: the fish/yogurt confusion from yesterday).
Henry Ford
Footballguy
Funniest junkie other than Greg Giraldo.no, it's really not.It's very much in his delivery. Much better live than reading his material.I thought Steven Wright was pretty funny too. This guy's stuff at least that I read in the link in here was like. "oh. Yeah. That's clever.
Limp Ditka
Footballguy
Can someone please explain to me the post football success of one Michael Strahan?
Since retirement he's landed
- Football Sunday studio job at Fox. This one makes some sense. If Shannon Sharpe could mumble his way through it for years, I'm assuming anyone that strapped on a helmet could.
- A sitcom
- Replaced Regis
now in talks to go to GMA?
Since retirement he's landed
- Football Sunday studio job at Fox. This one makes some sense. If Shannon Sharpe could mumble his way through it for years, I'm assuming anyone that strapped on a helmet could.
- A sitcom
- Replaced Regis
now in talks to go to GMA?
Witz
Footballguy
It's very much in his delivery. Much better live than reading his material.I thought Steven Wright was pretty funny too. This guy's stuff at least that I read in the link in here was like. "oh. Yeah. That's clever.
BobbyLayne
Footballguy
Dumped wife, got the child support drastically reduced (from $250K to $60K), and now banging Eddie Murphy's ex.
Would not have predicted 8 years ago he'd have more than 3x the net worth of Tiki Barber ($45m to $14m).
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
krista and any others who have been - Turks and Caicos: I know pretty much nothing about the place other than the fact that it was occupied by the Australians during World War I. A couple we're friends with is basically getting a free week at a house on the beach and invited us to join. They extended the offer to us OR us + kid. I'm trying to figure out how we'd swing the former, but is it even going to matter? Is this the kind of place we're JUST going to want to hang out on the beach and/or the water or is there a lot of nightlife that would make us wish we'd gone sans kid?
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Homer J Simpson
I don't push
A niece, huh?Bob Sacamano said:They need a group for ifriends. Something that keeps Homer from seeing that I even have a niece. And Tanner from recognizing that he went to middle school with my grandma.heckmanm said:I cross-posted here from FB, but K4's was the link I saw over there. Nothing personal GB.Semi-related - I need someone to write a filter for FB so I can assign nicknames to people. With a few exceptions, I have a hell of a time recognizing people here on FB (see: the fish/yogurt confusion from yesterday).Idiot Boxer said:This is why I don't post here as much Bob. No one commented on my posting of the Mitch Hedberg link 3 hours before K4 did.
I'm like a third world citizen in this thread. Better go get my Kim Jong Un haircut.
5-ish Finkle
Footballguy
My grandparents had a rat in their toilet once. Grandfather used a mop handle to pin that @$@W#$'s head to the side of the bowl, grabbed its neck, marched it directly to their wood-burning furnace and gave that sumb@#$h the mother of all funeral pyres.Henry Ford said:
No rats in toilets since. Pretty sure word got around.
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
Is he aware that shooting the squirrel with the bee bee gun would be more likely to keep it from eating more tomatoes?
Homer J Simpson
I don't push
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Wright rules
Hedberg rules
Pun Dog rules
Brent Rambo rules
Toilet rats suck
Hedberg rules
Pun Dog rules
Brent Rambo rules
Toilet rats suck
Homer J Simpson
I don't push
Guster
Footballguy
I'm just glad someone asked you this question for once instead of me!bentley said:I'm developing and leveraging my network for business results and community improvement all the time. So, not really.shuke said:Jesus do you ever actually work?bentley said:Agree. Read the whole thing at work today. Laughed my ### off.I managed to have a lunch session with the local chapter of the American Marketing Association and a dinner where we were honored as one of the Best Companies to Work for in Texas. It would have been the perfect workday if I could have found someone to buy my breakfast.shuke said:All time favorite.
Now drinking Bulleit, America's favorite bourbon, and catching up on things.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
Homer J Simpson
I don't push
DA RAIDERS
Footballguy
noAbraham said:
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
I'M SURE THERE'S A MARGARET CHO SPECIAL ON OUT THERE FOR YOUOtis said:
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
Providenciales. Taylor Bay, specifically.
Sammy3469
Footballguy
Homer J Simpson
I don't push
Ignoramus
Footballguy
AND THERE ARE MORE THAN ONE TURK AND MORE THAN ONE CAICO!
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
General Malaise
Footballguy
“I lifted the lid and this furry little guy with beady eyes looked at me. I slammed the lid down and immediately Googled what do you do with a rat in your toilet,” he said.St. Louis Bob said:
Henry Ford
Footballguy
Wow, how did I miss that part?“I lifted the lid and this furry little guy with beady eyes looked at me. I slammed the lid down and immediately Googled what do you do with a rat in your toilet,” he said.St. Louis Bob said:
Thorn
Footballguy
Hey guys. Recent update?
I'm at home for the next several hours awaiting my new mattress to be delivered. They do the cable-guy style timing where it's anywhere from 1-3pm, which usually means 3:05 pm. I should say "newer" mattress since this will be the third one I've bought since the new gf decided mine was too old. The first time, we looked at Bob's Discount and she found one she liked, but it was like $1000. The sales guy had written the name of it down on his card, so one day with time to kill I looked through the "pit" where they have rejects. There was one in there for half price. I bought it and hauled it home myself, thinking it was a nice surprise.
I guess mattresses aren't a nice surprise though. I guess you're supposed to let your gf try it out even when it's the same one she picked out. Anyway, the second one was a high end job from Serta after I insisted that we needed one with a return policy. I guess it's not nice to insist upon a return policy in that situation, even though you got the exact mattress your gf picked out. That one was $1295.
I guess it's too firm, so "we" exchanged it for a softer model that I'm waiting to be delivered. It only costs a $125 restocking fee, so I guess I got that going for me.
I'm at home for the next several hours awaiting my new mattress to be delivered. They do the cable-guy style timing where it's anywhere from 1-3pm, which usually means 3:05 pm. I should say "newer" mattress since this will be the third one I've bought since the new gf decided mine was too old. The first time, we looked at Bob's Discount and she found one she liked, but it was like $1000. The sales guy had written the name of it down on his card, so one day with time to kill I looked through the "pit" where they have rejects. There was one in there for half price. I bought it and hauled it home myself, thinking it was a nice surprise.
I guess mattresses aren't a nice surprise though. I guess you're supposed to let your gf try it out even when it's the same one she picked out. Anyway, the second one was a high end job from Serta after I insisted that we needed one with a return policy. I guess it's not nice to insist upon a return policy in that situation, even though you got the exact mattress your gf picked out. That one was $1295.
I guess it's too firm, so "we" exchanged it for a softer model that I'm waiting to be delivered. It only costs a $125 restocking fee, so I guess I got that going for me.
-fish-
Footballguy
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