GM's thread about nothing (20 Viewers)

[bentley]

Hey the mayor and his husband are here!

Rubbin elbows with the elite. I like it. And I like mini corn dogs.In some fit of horrible planning, I moved all the liquor to the new house today. Didn't even think about it until five minutes ago when I went to pour myself a tall glass of Bulleit to celebrate the last night in the old house.

Is your car over there too?

Liquor stores close at 9, Ace.

 

[shuke]

Took Wed-Fri off this week to get caught up on some things around the house, enjoy some time with the kids before school starts, and plus I just needed a vacation. Trying to figure out what to do tomorrow. Zoo, swimming at in-laws, or Kings Island. I really want to take them to KI, because it seems per my facebook feed everyone else is in school already. But we'd have to be back about 4:00 because my son has tae kwon do belt testing tomorrow night so not sure I want to drop the money for just a partial day.

 

[shuke]

Hey the mayor and his husband are here!

Rubbin elbows with the elite. I like it. And I like mini corn dogs.In some fit of horrible planning, I moved all the liquor to the new house today. Didn't even think about it until five minutes ago when I went to pour myself a tall glass of Bulleit to celebrate the last night in the old house.

Is your car over there too?

Liquor stores close at 9, Ace.

Life will be so much better when someone invents beer.

 

[Josie Maran]

Hey the mayor and his husband are here!

Rubbin elbows with the elite. I like it. And I like mini corn dogs.In some fit of horrible planning, I moved all the liquor to the new house today. Didn't even think about it until five minutes ago when I went to pour myself a tall glass of Bulleit to celebrate the last night in the old house.

Is your car over there too?

Liquor stores close at 9, Ace.

I meant go to the new place and get some of your booze.

 

[Frostillicus]

Took Wed-Fri off this week to get caught up on some things around the house, enjoy some time with the kids before school starts, and plus I just needed a vacation. Trying to figure out what to do tomorrow. Zoo, swimming at in-laws, or Kings Island. I really want to take them to KI, because it seems per my facebook feed everyone else is in school already. But we'd have to be back about 4:00 because my son has tae kwon do belt testing tomorrow night so not sure I want to drop the money for just a partial day.

I'd vote zoo. I love doing stuff like that with the kids. They just go so crazy in love looking at the animals. We have the underwater world at mall of america here and that's my favorite. I have no idea what Kings Island is.

 

[Frostillicus]

My wife has spent the last five minutes telling me how hot Mila Kunis is after that Jim Beam commercial came on.

 

[bentley]

Hey the mayor and his husband are here!

Rubbin elbows with the elite. I like it. And I like mini corn dogs.In some fit of horrible planning, I moved all the liquor to the new house today. Didn't even think about it until five minutes ago when I went to pour myself a tall glass of Bulleit to celebrate the last night in the old house.

Is your car over there too?

Liquor stores close at 9, Ace.

Life will be so much better when someone invents beer.

Yeah. I've had about 8 of those. I stand by my original position of being a little sad I can't enjoy a tall glass of whiskey on the back porch.

Angrywife also packed all the bottle openers, but luckily I keep one in the truck for when I need a roadie.

 

[bentley]

Hey the mayor and his husband are here!

Rubbin elbows with the elite. I like it. And I like mini corn dogs.In some fit of horrible planning, I moved all the liquor to the new house today. Didn't even think about it until five minutes ago when I went to pour myself a tall glass of Bulleit to celebrate the last night in the old house.

Is your car over there too?

Liquor stores close at 9, Ace.

I meant go to the new place and get some of your booze.

That's like a half hour away. Way too much work.

 

[Josie Maran]

Hey the mayor and his husband are here!

Rubbin elbows with the elite. I like it. And I like mini corn dogs.In some fit of horrible planning, I moved all the liquor to the new house today. Didn't even think about it until five minutes ago when I went to pour myself a tall glass of Bulleit to celebrate the last night in the old house.

Is your car over there too?

Liquor stores close at 9, Ace.

I meant go to the new place and get some of your booze.

That's like a half hour away. Way too much work.

Sorry man. That's a tough situation.

 

[Josie Maran]

My wife has spent the last five minutes telling me how hot Mila Kunis is after that Jim Beam commercial came on.

I am unfamiliar with the commercial, but will still have to agree with the missus.

 

[Officer Pete Malloy]

This lady is pretty neat (NSFW language).

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

They usually do both. But it's still all about making a show of donating.

Exactly. Just donate quietly.

Why?

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

I bathed in Lake Superior this morning. I think it would kill jplvr.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

Seems like it started up there in early spring and involved jumping into cold lakes and ponds. That was a little more impressive. There's also the polar bear thing which raises money for something. Not sure if any of these are actually related though.

And why are you watching the videos? Only tune in if there is a chance of nipples that are relevant to your interests. Otherwise keep on scrolling.

Yeah, plenty of friends jumped in the lake in winter...some even had ice rescue peeps at the ready this year.

 

[Josie Maran]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

I bathed in Lake Superior this morning. I think it would kill jplvr.

How was the shave?

 

[Frostillicus]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

I bathed in Lake Superior this morning. I think it would kill jplvr.

Gross.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

I bathed in Lake Superior this morning. I think it would kill jplvr.

How was the shave?

I missed behind my right ear

 

[Frostillicus]

So I go online today to pay my credit card bills and my Mastercard is really high and I had not used it much lately. but let me go back a little ways, first. Last weekend, I had to miss my GBGM's wedding. I just had too much going on to take off 3-4 days to go to Detroit. Thursday night his soon-to-be BIL was throwing a bachelor party / poker game in his honor and I decided it would be good schtick to have some strippers deliver an ice cream cake to the event and dance to some Neil Young songs. So after calling around the greater Detroit area, I finally found a stripp-o-gram operation that promised to pick up an ice cream cake, take it to the poker game, and serve it to the guests while singing Heart of Gold and Southern Man in the nude. The only catch was that I had to find and pay for an ice cream cake. I tell them to give me an hour and I'll call them back. Eva's ice Cream in Lake Orion seemed like the best choice after some Google searching, so I call them up. but they sell ice cream. And they sell cakes. but they do not sell ice cream cakes. I spend 15 minutes with the owner trying to get her to concoct the unimaginable recipe of smearing a couple of quarts of ice cream on top of one cake and then putting another cake on top of that. I offered her $100 to perform this complicated task and I think I just about had her talked into it, until I told her it needed to be done ASAP before the strippers showed up. She hung up on me and no one there would answer the phone when I repeatedly tried to call back. I tried a few other places with no luck, but finally the Lake Orion DQ told me that they had ice cream cakes ready to go, but they closed in 15 minutes. He even agreed to a credit card payment - if I threw in an extra twenty bucks for the trouble. I called back the strippers, but they said there was no way they could get to Lake Orion before the DQ closed. So I told them to blow it off. That without an ice cream cake it would just be inferior schtick. Evidently the strippers had caller ID, because they called me back twenty minutes later and told me the Kroger sold Ice cream cakes. So I call the Lake Orion Kroger to see if I could charge one of their delicious cakes on my Mastercard for my hired performers ( I had learned that the sensibilities of Western Detroit merchants were offended when it came to holding cakes for strippers). My new-found decorum was lost on the Kroger manager, as he would not let me pay for a cake over the phone no matter who was picking it up. So I called back the strippers and told them it was still a no go because the Kroger wouldn't take a credit card over the phone. So they told me that if I would pay them $375 ($100 over the previously negotiated price) that they would pay for the cake themselves. Ok I said, relenting to their unrealistic demands due to my BAC and determination to see this task through. But that wasn't enough. Evidently the Detroit-based strippers were too inept to get to Lake Orion, unless I was willing to stay on the cell phone while they navigated to the privileged western regions of the county while read turn-by turn directions from Google maps. To help pass the time while they drove, I worked with them on the lyrics to Heart of Gold and Southern Man. Turns out they really did not know either song and were doing a woeful job of memorizing the words while I played an MP3 in the background during our phone conversation. My patience is running thin because they only remember half of the chorus to Southern Man and hardly any of Heart of GOld. But they finally make it to the Lake Orion Kroger. Once there they cannot find any ice cream cakes. They find ice cream and they find cakes. But no ice cream cakes. I figured if na Ice Cream shop owner (like Eva from Eva's ice Cream) in Michigan cannot figure out how to transform two cakes and half a gallon ice cream into a delicious ice cream cake - there's no way it worth even attempting to do it over a cell phone with two strippers from Detroit. At this point I've spent over three hours trying to get this done and I am ready to give up. I told them it had to be ice cream cake or the deal was off. They insisted that cake and ice cream was a suitable substitute and I was still obligated to go thru with the deal. Sorry, strippers, but that was not the agreement. Several minutes and hundreds of profanities later I turned off my cell and ended the once- flourishing relationship. About that time Charvik calls me on my home phone. I had left him a message several hours earlier to try and help me coordinate the stripper and ice cream cake fiasco. I briefly attempted to enlist his support in obtaining an ice cream cake, but I don't know if you have ever tried communicating with a drunken Norwegian who is barely understandable when sober, but its not pretty. Or productive. He finally hands off the phone to Forrest. I still ahve glimmers of hope that I may somehow pull this off as a surprise, so I have to chat with Forrest and pretend that I am just calling to wish him luck yada yada yada. I finally get his drunk ### off the phone and he gives the receiver to JTC, who is also in town for the festivities. His complete drunkenness makes him even more indecipherable than the drunken Norwegian who first called me. By this time its almost midnight and I decide to give up. I had given it my best shot and failed. Now I see the strippers charged me $375 with a $500 tip for their troubles. That seems excessive since they never delivered cake, took off their clothes or learned any of the Neil young lyrics. I think I may file a dispute over the charges.

Never forget.

 

[Frostillicus]

Room temperature chicken fingers >>>>>>>> hot chicken fingers.

Wait now. No way.

 

[Josie Maran]

 

[YSR]

 

[Good Posting Judge]

It's really hard to #### with blueberries.

 

[Josie Maran]

It's really hard to #### with blueberries.

I want to like them, but I don't.

It's just like with FDAS, except I'm glad I don't like him.

 

[DA RAIDERS]

Had a co-worker at lunch tell me his sloppy joe would have been better with a slice cheese on it...I literally asked him what the #### was wrong with him

You should have just punched him. The man's obviously insane.

my argument is that everything is better with cheese

Is #### better with cheese?

Yes

 

[DA RAIDERS]

Hey the mayor and his husband are here!

Rubbin elbows with the elite. I like it. And I like mini corn dogs.In some fit of horrible planning, I moved all the liquor to the new house today. Didn't even think about it until five minutes ago when I went to pour myself a tall glass of Bulleit to celebrate the last night in the old house.

Is your car over there too?

Liquor stores close at 9, Ace.

Man, Texas is ### backwards in some regards.

 

[DA RAIDERS]

Why is this alcoholic, drug addict, convicted felon, lil Wayne being given a platform on Espn?

 

[-fish-]

Why is this alcoholic, drug addict, convicted felon, lil Wayne being given a platform on Espn?

Cause he's a pretty awesome rapper?

 

[Ignoramus]

Hey the mayor and his husband are here!

Rubbin elbows with the elite. I like it. And I like mini corn dogs.In some fit of horrible planning, I moved all the liquor to the new house today. Didn't even think about it until five minutes ago when I went to pour myself a tall glass of Bulleit to celebrate the last night in the old house.

Is your car over there too?

Liquor stores close at 9, Ace.

Man, Texas is ### backwards in some regards.

Oh it's worse than Uganda. Can't buy booze on Sunday, and beer only after noon.

 

[Abraham]

Jessica Alba was on Andy cohens show last night with her boobs practically Hanging out.

 

[kevzilla]

Why is this alcoholic, drug addict, convicted felon, lil Wayne being given a platform on Espn?

ESPN is already full of alcoholics and drug addicts. Adding a rapper is not much of a stretch.

 

[Tecumseh]

Jessica Alba was on Andy cohens show last night with her boobs practically Hanging out.

Cool story.

Make your pick.

 

[Tiger Fan]

Oooof

https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?v=802369106450650&fref=nf

 

[Henry Ford]

Why is this alcoholic, drug addict, convicted felon, lil Wayne being given a platform on Espn?

Louisiana is entitled to representation, too.

 

[Henry Ford]

Anyone here own a pants press? Are they as awesome as they seem out of the box?

 

[Captain Quinoa]

Anyone here own a pants press? Are they as awesome as they seem out of the box?

I have a Panini press

 

[Henry Ford]

Anyone here own a pants press? Are they as awesome as they seem out of the box?

I have a Panini press

I'll try some cheese in the pants. Will report back.

 

[El Floppo]

Anyone here own a pants press? Are they as awesome as they seem out of the box?

A rotary iron?

 

[Osaurus]

Pizza oven?

 

[Ignoramus]

Pizza oven?

IT'S A NAAN OVEN, YOU SAVAGE!

 

[Henry Ford]

Anyone here own a pants press? Are they as awesome as they seem out of the box?

A rotary iron?

Trouser Press

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I prefer the 3301

 

[Captain Quinoa]

Anyone here own a pants press? Are they as awesome as they seem out of the box?

A rotary iron?

Trouser Press

I know a gal who will get the wrinkles out of your pants for 10 bucks.

 

[Henry Ford]

Anyone here own a pants press? Are they as awesome as they seem out of the box?

A rotary iron?

Trouser Press

I know a gal who will get the wrinkles out of your pants for 10 bucks.

But will she put a crease into the trouser legs?

 

[Bob Sacamano]

1. Grapes - crushed and fermented

2. Honeycrisps

3. Peaches

4. Cherries

5. Blueberries

6. Grapes - Red

7. Pineapple

8. Plum

9. Grapes - Green

10. You're eating too much fruit, and you're going to have the ####s soon. Just stop.*

*Strawberries actually probably belong high on this list, but there's a decent chance they'd send me to the morgue. I'm going pro-choice AND pro-life.

 

[shuke]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

I bathed in Lake Superior this morning. I think it would kill jplvr.

Did you shave?

 

[Captain Quinoa]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

I bathed in Lake Superior this morning. I think it would kill jplvr.

Did you shave?

Just his coin purse

 

[Sammy3469]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

I bathed in Lake Superior this morning. I think it would kill jplvr.

Did you shave?

Just his coin purse

"Ouch"

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

It's fine that it's getting the word out and they're raising so much money. I just think it's ridiculous seeing a bunch of grown men squealing as they poor ice cold water on themselves while it's 100+ degrees outside.

They should do this "challenge" in February in front of Tre's igloo.

I bathed in Lake Superior this morning. I think it would kill jplvr.

Did you shave?

Shaved my head

 

[bostonfred]

A guy just went to the urinal with an open bottle of apple juice in his hand and set it on the top of the urinal while he peed. How lazy are you that you'd rather drink contaminated juice than hold an eight ounce bottle for the duration of a pee?¿?

 

[AhrnCityPahnder]

Red grapes are better than green.

Dissing red delicious seems kinda hipster. They have their place amongst all the other tasty apples.

Plums are bull ####.

Watermelon isn't the overall best, but when you get a good one, I mean really cold and juicy, at the perfect time of a perfectly blistering hot day, when everything kind of lines up just so... it can't be beat.

A perfectly ripe, refrigerated watermelon early in the morning when you're hungover as #### is as close to nirvana as I will get on this planet.