How long does it take you to get ready for work in the morning? (1 Viewer)

[heckmanm]

Tumble out of bed

And stumble to the kitchen

Pour myself a cup of ambition

And yawn and stretch and try to come to life

Jump in the shower

And the blood starts pumpin'

Out on the streets, the traffic starts jumpin'

For folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Early in the morning, risin' to the street

Light me up that cigarette and I strap shoes on my feet

Got to find a reason, a reason things went wrong

Got to find a reason why my money's all gone

I got a dalmatian, and I can still get high

I can play the guitar like a mother ####### riot

Just waking up in the morning gotta thank God

I don't know but today seems kinda odd

No barking from the dogs, no smog

And momma cooked a breakfast with no hog

Woke up, fell out of bed,
Dragged a comb across my head
Found my way downstairs and drank a cup,
And looking up I noticed I was late.

Found my coat and grabbed my hat
Made the bus in seconds flat
Found my way upstairs and had a smoke,
Somebody spoke and I went into a dream.

 

[heckmanm]

Tumble out of bed

And stumble to the kitchen

Pour myself a cup of ambition

And yawn and stretch and try to come to life

Jump in the shower

And the blood starts pumpin'

Out on the streets, the traffic starts jumpin'

For folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Early in the morning, risin' to the street

Light me up that cigarette and I strap shoes on my feet

Got to find a reason, a reason things went wrong

Got to find a reason why my money's all gone

I got a dalmatian, and I can still get high

I can play the guitar like a mother ####### riot

Just waking up in the morning gotta thank God

I don't know but today seems kinda odd

No barking from the dogs, no smog

And momma cooked a breakfast with no hog

 

[AAABatteries]

doesnt anyone else rub one out in the morning?

i thought we were just counting bare minimum to get ready. i get up at 7:15 and don't leave until 9:15. there's actually a lot i get done some mornings.

2 hours is my bare minimum. Work or not, I wake up two hours earlier than I need to leave.

Wait...that list wasn't a joke?

Mine is legit. Been this way for many years

You really poop 2 times every morning? IBS?

 

[George Jefferson Airplane]

Based on the answers in this thread, anything longer than 30 minutes to get ready and you're pretty much a woman.

 

[tonydead]

45 minutes

10 minutes poop #1

10 minutes shower

10 minutes dress, teeth, hair

10 minutes packing lunch, taking care of dogs

5 minutes poop #2

Savings:

eat breakfast at the office

shave once a week on Sundays

 

[VA703]

45 minutes

10 minutes poop #1

10 minutes shower

10 minutes dress, teeth, hair

10 minutes packing lunch, taking care of dogs

5 minutes poop #2

Savings:

eat breakfast at the office

shave once a week on Sundays

post shower poops are the hardest to clean

 

[chauncey]

Tumble out of bed

And stumble to the kitchen

Pour myself a cup of ambition

And yawn and stretch and try to come to life

Jump in the shower

And the blood starts pumpin'

Out on the streets, the traffic starts jumpin'

For folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Early in the morning, risin' to the street

Light me up that cigarette and I strap shoes on my feet

Got to find a reason, a reason things went wrong

Got to find a reason why my money's all gone

I got a dalmatian, and I can still get high

I can play the guitar like a mother ####### riot

Just waking up in the morning gotta thank GodI don't know but today seems kinda odd

No barking from the dogs, no smog

And momma cooked a breakfast with no hog

Woke up this morning bout 10:13

Six pack of stout and a stick of sensi

 

[El Floppo]

Tumble out of bed

And stumble to the kitchen

Pour myself a cup of ambition

And yawn and stretch and try to come to life

Jump in the shower

And the blood starts pumpin'

Out on the streets, the traffic starts jumpin'

For folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Early in the morning, risin' to the street

Light me up that cigarette and I strap shoes on my feet

Got to find a reason, a reason things went wrong

Got to find a reason why my money's all gone

I got a dalmatian, and I can still get high

I can play the guitar like a mother ####### riot

Just waking up in the morning gotta thank GodI don't know but today seems kinda odd

No barking from the dogs, no smog

And momma cooked a breakfast with no hog

Woke up this morning bout 10:13

Six pack of stout and a stick of sensi

I bought a toothbrush, some toothpaste

A flannel for my face

Pajamas, a hairbrush

New shoes and a case

I said to my reflection

Let's get out of this place

 

[Amused to Death]

Tumble out of bed

And stumble to the kitchen

Pour myself a cup of ambition

And yawn and stretch and try to come to life

Jump in the shower

And the blood starts pumpin'

Out on the streets, the traffic starts jumpin'

For folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Early in the morning, risin' to the street

Light me up that cigarette and I strap shoes on my feet

Got to find a reason, a reason things went wrong

Got to find a reason why my money's all gone

I got a dalmatian, and I can still get high

I can play the guitar like a mother ####### riot

Just waking up in the morning gotta thank GodI don't know but today seems kinda odd

No barking from the dogs, no smog

And momma cooked a breakfast with no hog

Woke up this morning bout 10:13Six pack of stout and a stick of sensi

I bought a toothbrush, some toothpasteA flannel for my face

Pajamas, a hairbrush

New shoes and a case

I said to my reflection

Let's get out of this place

Hmmm, tempting.

 

[Gianni Verscotchie]

doesnt anyone else rub one out in the morning?

i thought we were just counting bare minimum to get ready. i get up at 7:15 and don't leave until 9:15. there's actually a lot i get done some mornings.

2 hours is my bare minimum. Work or not, I wake up two hours earlier than I need to leave.

Wait...that list wasn't a joke?

Mine is legit. Been this way for many years

You really poop 2 times every morning? IBS?

Usually. No IBS.

I refuse to go at work, so I like to make sure that I'm done for the day.

 

[eoMMan]

I'm pretty embarrassed to find out that my morning routine is way longer than most here. Wake up at 6:35 and out the door at 8:40 and I don't eat breakfast! Been doing this for more than 15 years

6:35: Wake

6:36: Pee

6:37: Brush teeth

6:40: Put on coffee

6:42: Turn on the news. Fire up iPad

6:45: Prepare coffee #1 to drink

6:55: First sip of coffee

7:05: Finish Coffee #1

7:06: Prepare Coffee #2

7:08: Poop #1

7:20: First sip of Coffee #2

7:30: Finish Coffee #2, Take Vitamins

7:31: Prepare Coffee #3

7:32: Turn on iron

7:33: Choose and lay out work clothes on bed

7:38: Iron shirt

7:41: First sip of Coffee #3

7:51: Finish Coffee #3

7:53: Poop #2 (lol)

8:03: Start shower

8:04: Begin washing once optimal temp is reached

8:07: Slather face with coconut oil

8:08: Slather face with Tea Tree oil

8:09: Commence shaving

8:14: Shampoo hair

8:15: Floss teeth or Polish Rocket (optional)

8:20: Dry off

8:22: Apply Deodorant, Cologne, Swab ears

8:24: Brush teeth again

8:27: Apply Hair product

8:28: Get dressed

8:34: Shut off TV, Check thermostat

8:36: Give dog a treat

8:38: Start Mercedes AMG

8:40: Back out of the garage

9:10: Arrive at work ten minutes late

I'd like to save some time, but I'm not sure what to give up.

You left out name/brand of clothes, cologne, etc.

 

[Gianni Verscotchie]

I'm pretty embarrassed to find out that my morning routine is way longer than most here. Wake up at 6:35 and out the door at 8:40 and I don't eat breakfast! Been doing this for more than 15 years

6:35: Wake

6:36: Pee

6:37: Brush teeth

6:40: Put on coffee

6:42: Turn on the news. Fire up iPad

6:45: Prepare coffee #1 to drink

6:55: First sip of coffee

7:05: Finish Coffee #1

7:06: Prepare Coffee #2

7:08: Poop #1

7:20: First sip of Coffee #2

7:30: Finish Coffee #2, Take Vitamins

7:31: Prepare Coffee #3

7:32: Turn on iron

7:33: Choose and lay out work clothes on bed

7:38: Iron shirt

7:41: First sip of Coffee #3

7:51: Finish Coffee #3

7:53: Poop #2 (lol)

8:03: Start shower

8:04: Begin washing once optimal temp is reached

8:07: Slather face with coconut oil

8:08: Slather face with Tea Tree oil

8:09: Commence shaving

8:14: Shampoo hair

8:15: Floss teeth or Polish Rocket (optional)

8:20: Dry off

8:22: Apply Deodorant, Cologne, Swab ears

8:24: Brush teeth again

8:27: Apply Hair product

8:28: Get dressed

8:34: Shut off TV, Check thermostat

8:36: Give dog a treat

8:38: Start Mercedes AMG

8:40: Back out of the garage

9:10: Arrive at work ten minutes late

I'd like to save some time, but I'm not sure what to give up.

You left out name/brand of clothes, cologne, etc.

6:35: Wake iphone 6s+

6:36: Pee Kohler

6:37: Brush teeth Colgate Total Care on Oral-B Electric

6:40: Put on coffee Cuisinart

6:42: Turn on the news. 70" Sharp Aquos w/DirecTV Fire up iPad

6:45: Prepare coffee #1 to drink

6:55: First sip of coffee

7:05: Finish Coffee #1

7:06: Prepare Coffee #2

7:08: Poop #1

7:20: First sip of Coffee #2

7:30: Finish Coffee #2, Take Vitamins Kirkland

7:31: Prepare Coffee #3

7:32: Turn on iron Rowenta

7:33: Choose and lay out work clothes on bed Jos A. Bank but varies

7:38: Iron shirt

7:41: First sip of Coffee #3

7:51: Finish Coffee #3

7:53: Poop #2 (lol)

8:03: Start shower Kohler

8:04: Begin washing once optimal temp is reached

8:07: Slather face with coconut oil OGX Nourishing Coconut Milk

8:08: Slather face with Tea Tree oil Bath & Body Works

8:09: Commence shaving Gillette Fusion ProGlide

8:14: Shampoo hair Paul Mitchell Tea Tree Shampoo

8:15: Floss teeth Plackers Micro Mint or Polish Rocket (optional)

8:20: Dry off Costco Turkish Towel

8:22: Apply Deodorant, Right Guard Sport Fresh Solid Cologne, Dolce & Gabbanna The One Gentleman Swab ears Q-tip

8:24: Brush teeth again

8:27: Apply Hair product American Crew Firm Hold Styling Gel

8:28: Get dressed

8:34: Shut off TV, Check thermostat Nest

8:36: Give dog a treat Riley's Organics Human Grade Dog Treats

8:38: Start Mercedes AMG

8:40: Back out of the garage Craftsman

9:10: Arrive at work ten minutes late

Fixed

 

[Zow]

Tumble out of bed

And stumble to the kitchen

Pour myself a cup of ambition

And yawn and stretch and try to come to life

Jump in the shower

And the blood starts pumpin'

Out on the streets, the traffic starts jumpin'

For folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Early in the morning, risin' to the street

Light me up that cigarette and I strap shoes on my feet

Got to find a reason, a reason things went wrong

Got to find a reason why my money's all gone

I got a dalmatian, and I can still get high

I can play the guitar like a mother ####### riot

Just waking up in the morning gotta thank GodI don't know but today seems kinda odd

No barking from the dogs, no smog

And momma cooked a breakfast with no hog

Woke up this morning bout 10:13

Six pack of stout and a stick of sensi

I bought a toothbrush, some toothpaste

A flannel for my face

Pajamas, a hairbrush

New shoes and a case

I said to my reflection

Let's get out of this place

It's the first of the month...

So wake up, wake up,

It's the first of the month...

So get up, get up.

 

[DoubleG]

45 minutes

10 minutes poop #1

10 minutes shower

10 minutes dress, teeth, hair

10 minutes packing lunch, taking care of dogs

5 minutes poop #2

Savings:

eat breakfast at the office

shave once a week on Sundays

post shower poops are the hardest to clean

Poop first, shower 2nd. HTH.

 

[Doctor Detroit]

Tumble out of bed

And stumble to the kitchen

Pour myself a cup of ambition

And yawn and stretch and try to come to life

Jump in the shower

And the blood starts pumpin'

Out on the streets, the traffic starts jumpin'

For folks like me on the job from 9 to 5

Early in the morning, risin' to the street

Light me up that cigarette and I strap shoes on my feet

Got to find a reason, a reason things went wrong

Got to find a reason why my money's all gone

I got a dalmatian, and I can still get high

I can play the guitar like a mother ####### riot

Just waking up in the morning gotta thank GodI don't know but today seems kinda odd

No barking from the dogs, no smog

And momma cooked a breakfast with no hog

Woke up this morning bout 10:13

Six pack of stout and a stick of sensi

Well, that's what unemployed morons tend to do. You have a drinking problem or you do you use your welfare benies on chips and salsa?