Henry Ford
Footballguy
Spinoff of the "college flame" thread. If you knew a buddy - not your best friend but some guy you hang out with - was cheating on his wife and bragging about it either in person or on the internet, would you tell her?
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If you knew a buddy was cheating on his wife and bragging about it (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter Henry Ford
- Start date
Arizona Ron
Footballguy
Hell no.
mr roboto
Footballguy
Probably no simply because it throws you in the middle. He's a buddy not one of your closest friends. What are the chances that you even know his wife that well?
I would certainly say something to him though. And mention that if I'm hearing about it it's getting around and your wife is gonna hear it real soon.
I would certainly say something to him though. And mention that if I'm hearing about it it's getting around and your wife is gonna hear it real soon.
5-ish Finkle
Footballguy
Okay, I was wrong on principle in the other false start thread. 
No. Mind yer business.
No. Mind yer business.
This is the correct answer.
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Rhythmdoctor
Footballguy
Im here for the midget gang bang.
G
Guest
Guest
Apple Jack
Footballguy
How is this even a question? Hell no.
tom22406
Footballguy
Depends on how close I was with her and how big a ######## my buddy was.Had this happen to me with my then wife to be cheating on me with one of my best friends and he was man enough to tell me before we got married.Flip side was we didn't remain friends after that but I was glad he told me for sure.
Sweet J
Footballguy
No, no, no, no. A million times no. We don't know his and her situation. Telling could possibly make things worse. Maybe she already knows and wants to pretend she doesn't. Maybe she won't believe you. Maybe tomorrow he cuts ties with the mistress and recommits to his family for reals. Maybe maybe maybe.
The best thing to do is to stay out of it.
The best thing to do is to stay out of it.
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G
Guest
Guest
No, but down depending on my relationship with him I may talk to him about it. I had the conversation with a friend once and got him to stop and take inventory of what was going to happen when he inevitably got caught. Once he did that, he was genuinely fearful of losing his wife. Until a couple of years later when he pocket dialed his wife while bragging to a buddy about a chick he was nailing. Ran into him years later and he confessed that he'd ruined everything worth having in his life. What your witnessing is like watching a buddy drinking himself into dangerous situations. If you're a good friend you should let him know it's not a badge of honor.
Spin
Footballguy
Posted this in the SP thread, figured I'd post it here as well. How good of friends am I with her? Situation happened to me when I was in college. I was equal friends with both of them, I told him either he tells her or I do. He ended up telling her and leaving her for his side piece. Don't talk to him any more, he ended up marrying the chick he was cheating with, til she was pregnant with another guy's kid. So he's divorced now and still works at the restaurant. The original girl ended up getting married to the midget from the Pirates of the Caribbean movies. Go figure.
The Commish
Footballguy
Wouldn't be a buddy long after seeing/reading it. Probably send an anonymous note for her to check out said bragging and be done with it/them. I have zero tolerance for cheating.
Peyton Marino
Footballguy
are you suggesting this is what happened in the SL,MCF thread?
Sweet J
Footballguy
Interesting. I think the "dangerous drinking" is both a good and a bad analogy.
For starters, It's a lot easier to tell that drinking is "dangerous" than cheating is (i.e., unless you are dealing with unstable people, cheating probably won't kill you). But it's a good analogy because there really isn't anything you can do as a friend who is a problem drinker, other than continue to be his friend (which, ironically, may include you stopping contact until his behavior changes).
But one piece of advice is damn good: This guy probably needs as good friend to talk to. I would think to most people in this situation, cheating isn't fun. Particularly if he's married with kids. He probably would be despirate for someone to talk to about it.
Spin
Footballguy
What if you're also friends with her? If you are constantly going out with the same group of people, it's inevitable two of them will get together.
fatguyinalittlecoat
Footballguy
Huh? I'm not an expert but if the cheating isn't fun, why is he doing it?
My answer to the original question is "no" because if people found out I snitched, I would never get to hear any more interesting stories.
Tom Servo
Nittany Beavers
Better yet, tell her in a voice mail on her cell phone but inhale helium before leaving the information. She'll never guess who it is.
ShaqAttaq
Morally Ambiguous
Spin
Footballguy
DocHolliday
Footballguy
I would not tell her. I would talk to him. I would let him know that he will be caught eventually and he will likely lose his family.
T Bell
Footballguy
I agree with the "No" crowd, and I also agree that with a close friend I'd talk to him.
You have to assume that this sort of news is going to be a coup de grace to the marriage, so you have to ask yourself whether you have the right to apply it. Only if there was something physically harmful that I know would (not just could) come from this, and I suppose that would mean some sort of horrible disease or something, might I let her know.
Sweet J
Footballguy
This could be a thread upon itself. I got to run to a meeting. I'll try and remember to post something in response. Got a lot of thoughts here.
FUBAR
Footballguy
too many variables for a one-size fits all answer.
I've been in this situation with someone from work. That was an easier answer - I didn't talk to his wife, but we investigate and careers end over this stuff. If he's dumb enough to cheat and brag about it, he doesn't deserve to wear the uniform.
OTOH, if it's someone who I don't work with. our wives are probably also friends.
I tell my wife everything, there's a fair chance she'd talk to her friend.
So no, I wouldn't say anything directly to her, but she would find out.
Either way, his wife is finding out.
Sweet J
Footballguy
Harry Manback
Footballguy
Who do I know better? Him or Her? Did I know her first? Probably not say anything, but if she was the friend and I became buddies with him through her, possibly.
TenTimes
Backhoe Operator
This is where I'm at.
Similar situation, my wife told me her best friend was cheating on her husband (why do they tell us these things we do not want to know?
). Makes me a jerk because if it were my brother I'd obviously tell him, but this guy will never find this out from me.
Da Guru
Fair & Balanced
A buddy of mine who grew up had a high commission sales job cheated and had numerous affairs when he was in his thirties. Making big money lots of travel and unlimited expenses can lead to some wild behavior. I would never tell his wife nor my wife..it will go to my grave.
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El Floppo
Footballguy
The word but in hereEta...Okay, I was wrong on principle in the other false start thread.
No. Mind yer business.
This is the correct answer.
fing autocorrectThe quoted part in here
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The Commish
Footballguy
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tom22406
Footballguy
A key part for me is this is just a buddy you hang with and not my best friend and it also doesn't say how well I know the wife he is cheating on.
If it's my best friend I talk to him first without question no matter how well I know her or not.Just a buddy who isn't really that close does cloud the water here so if I don't know the wife that well I would talk to him first but if I'm friends with her more I would want her to know.
If it's my best friend I talk to him first without question no matter how well I know her or not.Just a buddy who isn't really that close does cloud the water here so if I don't know the wife that well I would talk to him first but if I'm friends with her more I would want her to know.
El Floppo
Footballguy
Helium voice = badAnonymous note = ok
Interesting
Eta
Reading comprehension = not good.
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FUBAR
Footballguy
that's implied and irrelevant to the question.The correct answer is obviously "Bang his Wife", but that choice was not given.
Well then you first try to romance her without telling her, and if that fails you tell her and go for the revenge sex.that's implied and irrelevant to the question.The correct answer is obviously "Bang his Wife", but that choice was not given.
fatguyinalittlecoat
Footballguy
Godsbrother
Footballguy
Not my bidness although I would seriously consider not being friends with the guy.
Al O'Pecia
Footballguy
If the guy is an acquaintance that I secretly don't like, his wife that's being cheated on is hot, and telling her could lead to some steamy revenge sex with me - then, yes, I may tell her.
Other than that perfect storm, though, I'm staying out of it.
Other than that perfect storm, though, I'm staying out of it.
Macdaddy_2004
Footballguy
I dunno why guys feel the need to let their buddies know they are cheating - it puts everyone in an awkward position. I've told my buddies in numerous joke conversations that even if I was ever cheating I'd never tell them.
The Commish
Footballguy
Helium voice = badAnonymous note = ok
Interesting
Eta
Reading comprehension = not good.
Henry Ford
Footballguy
Henry Ford
Footballguy
Also, "met."
RUSF18
Footballguy
I have a couple buddies who have strayed, some more than others, and I would honestly rather not know especially since all of our wives are friends for the most part.
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