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Jersey Shore (5 Viewers)
- Thread starter Walton Goggins
- Start date
parasaurolophus
Footballguy
guidette?
Sonny Lubick Blowup Doll
Footballguy
I watched that joker Tommy on MTV back in college. We got quite a few laughs out of that, so this could be entertaining. I stopped watching VH1, MTV, and all that crap when I became single, but now I have a gf again. BTW, what's going on with "I Love NY", Chance, and the Stallionaires...?
bmarks6161
Footballguy
Looks like Snookums got a knuckle sandwhich
cowboysin07
Footballguy
My facebook status:
This situation is gonna be indescribable. You can't even describe the situation that you are about to get into the situation- Jersey Shore 2009
This situation is gonna be indescribable. You can't even describe the situation that you are about to get into the situation- Jersey Shore 2009
Jaysus
Good times!
Frostillicus
Footballguy
JerseyToughGuys
Tough Guy
GB Bennys
JerseyToughGuys
Tough Guy
need to remember to dvr this next time.
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
"The Situation"???
:(
Love the guidos calling Nicole Snookie "Snickers" Good lord this show is better than I even expected.
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
This show makes me miss the days when I lived in NYC and went to NJ for ##### and gigs
Major
Footballguy
Spring Lake is about the only place I can tolerate on the Jersey Shore. Give me East Hampton/Montawk all day over Da Schoor
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
"I'm a bartender!" 
It's like being a doctor to them.
It's like being a doctor to them.
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
Montauk is a beautiful place.
tommyGunZ
Footballguy
Montauk doesn't have the Situation though...
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
I can't stop laughing and might start using that term.I wish the chicks at the house were hotter though.
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
chick: Look at me, I'm all natural, I'm hot
The Situation: Lose 5 or 10 lbs and we can talk
chick: yo, I will cut your hair while you are sleeping
The Situation: Lose 5 or 10 lbs and we can talk
chick: yo, I will cut your hair while you are sleeping
Maik Jeaunz
Footballguy
I think it's pretty difficult to find 8 people who don't have 1 redeeming quality among them. kudos, MTV.
Ignoratio Elenchi
Footballguy
Welcome to the Jersey shore.Maik Jeaunz said:
Chuck Cecil
Footballguy
You sir must not know about "The Situation"Maik Jeaunz said:
Neo
The Dude minds
Ever been to Long Beach Island? You can have the Hamptons....Montauk is amazing though.
pantherclub
Footballguy
How could you possibly be underwhelmed by the situation? I literally could not turn away from that train wreck. I watched it again today to make sure I was dreaming. "Back home I am a princess, people treat me like a ####### princess"
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
Saw a clip on TV guess scenes cut for the rest of the uncoming series, some chick on the show slaps the hell out of someone. Those guidettes don't mess around.
tommyGunZ
Footballguy
You're just not ready for the Situation.
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
You can practically end 'for the situation' in any sentence and it makes it that much better.
mr. furley
Footballguy
that accent. gah. i can't listen to more than a few seconds.
Unlucky
Phenom
www.mtv.com
pats3in4
Footballguy
Completely underwhelmed. It's "Real World - Jersey Shore" with the typical Real World setup of guys and girls sharing a house together, getting set up in a group job, etc., but a bunch of guidos and guidas were cast instead of the more diverse trainwreck of a cast Real World has seen in the last dozen or so years.If the premise was different, I'm in.The bit with Snookie and the duck phone was funny.
tommyGunZ
Footballguy
I'm with you on the format - I was hoping it was like the Jersey shore show a few years ago where they followed 4-6 people around as opposed to the Real World format.That being said, at least it's all guidos and not the usual, 1 gay, 1 black dude, 1 model guy, 1 model girl, 1 southerner, etc. formula that the usual RW's consist of.And is it okay to use the term guido now? I've never used it before; I always thought it was derogatory and inappropriate?
pantherclub
Footballguy
I believe that is the situation.
pantherclub
Footballguy
On a side note: in all of my travels I have never been to Jersey but is it completely acceptable to go shirtless to bars?
I saw this last night and didnt know if it was a promo night for the club or totally normal.
I saw this last night and didnt know if it was a promo night for the club or totally normal.
Baloney Sandwich
Footballguy
it is borderline unacceptable to wear a shirt at a Shore bar, one must either be shirtless or fist pumping but preferably both.
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
No. You can't fight in RW or you'll get kicked off the show. This show allows fighting and looks like there's no rules to get kicked off.
Amused to Death
Footballguy
Please do not mistake NY guidos for all of the East Coast. TIA.And yes it is the New Yawkers that invade Seaside, NJ.
Used to hang out on the boardwalk at Seaside on weekends in the '80s. Now we have kids and took them there a few years ago. Haven't been back since. I read some reviews about the new MTV show....seems to be pretty much the way it was a few years ago.
Amused to Death
Footballguy
I'm comfortable with it while talking about this show...they refer to themselves as "guidos" from what I've read.
skillz
Footballguy
Fixed.
Amused to Death
Footballguy
Here's the beginning of a funny column in my local paper:
You know what the best job in America is? Being in charge of finding above-average-looking, dumb as dirt 18- to 24-year-olds to star in MTV reality shows. I mean, is this not the easiest gig going?
“Hey, moron with the fake boobs, and you, you over there with the six-pack abs and the vacant stare! Yeah, you two! Want to get paid to be on MTV? Wonderful. Sign here.”
I bring this up because the greatest reality show in the history of history is set to debut Thursday night on MTV. It’s called “Jersey Shore,” and it stars — based on the trailer I saw at MTV.com — a bunch of young Staten Island Italians who spent their summer at Seaside Heights.
Note: I specifically identified them as Italian. This is an important point, as the cast makes no bones about their heritage. They discuss it, talk about it, and are proud of it.
They also call themselves “guidos” throughout the trailer, and, presumably, the series.
Link to rest of column:
http://www.trentonian.com/articles/2009/12...cd142794379.txt
You know what the best job in America is? Being in charge of finding above-average-looking, dumb as dirt 18- to 24-year-olds to star in MTV reality shows. I mean, is this not the easiest gig going?
“Hey, moron with the fake boobs, and you, you over there with the six-pack abs and the vacant stare! Yeah, you two! Want to get paid to be on MTV? Wonderful. Sign here.”
I bring this up because the greatest reality show in the history of history is set to debut Thursday night on MTV. It’s called “Jersey Shore,” and it stars — based on the trailer I saw at MTV.com — a bunch of young Staten Island Italians who spent their summer at Seaside Heights.
Note: I specifically identified them as Italian. This is an important point, as the cast makes no bones about their heritage. They discuss it, talk about it, and are proud of it.
They also call themselves “guidos” throughout the trailer, and, presumably, the series.
Link to rest of column:
http://www.trentonian.com/articles/2009/12...cd142794379.txt
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
I love how these guys talk about breaking chicks hearts, meet a chick, and 24 hours later are CRUSHED when the chick hooks up with another guy.
The end of the first show shows a lot of fights are coming up, guidettes and guidos. Even a guido coldcocks snookie.
The end of the first show shows a lot of fights are coming up, guidettes and guidos. Even a guido coldcocks snookie.
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pats3in4
Footballguy
Big deal. Because fighting is not allowed on RW, most of the screaming matches and name calling are off the charts because the roommates have no fear of getting popped. On this show, that kind of entertainment will be replaced for the most part by people throwing down before the crazytalk elevates further.Six in one hand, half a dozen in the other.
Walton Goggins
Footballguy
http://nymag.com/daily/entertainment/2009/...rsey_shore.html
Jersey Shore’s Top Ten Catchphrase Countdown
Way back in 2003, MTV produced an episode of its long-running True Life series called "I Have a Summer Share." In it, the world was introduced to Tommy and Anthony, two North Jersey goombas who spent their summer weekends traveling 75 exits down the Garden State Parkway from Whippany to the breathtaking trashy paradise of Seaside Heights on the Jersey Shore, a town Tommy dubbed "the biggest meat market in the world." Considering the show reached the sort of sublime heights rarely seen in the reality-television world, it's shocking that it took the brain trust at MTV some six years to realize that there was so much voyeuristic awesomeness on display during that solitary hour of television that they should make a whole series out of it. Well, the network finally got their act together and debuted not one but two hour-long episodes of Jersey Shore last night. Over the course of those 120 minutes, no less than ten stunning new catchphrases were born. So won't you join along as we count them down?
10. "Anybody know how to peel garlic?" —Mike "the Situation"
After a lifetime of growing up in Italian households, you would think that someone in the cast of eight guidos and guidettes would've hovered over their mothers' shoulders at one point and learned how to peel garlic. Sadly, you would be wrong.
9. "You have your penis pierced. I love it." —Jenni "JWOWW"
After housemates Pauly D and Jenni "JWOWW" found themselves a little bit buzzed and falling prey to the always romantic strains of house music at club Karma [side Note: We're strongly considering hitting up Google Maps and making a road trip there this weekend], they made their way back to the share and started making out. It was there and then that we learned that "the party's in Pauly D's pants tonight" (his words, not ours), and that said party was pierced.
8. "I feel like this is beneath me. I'm a bartender. I do great things." —Angelina "Jolie"
We've all been in a position at one time or another when we've felt like our unique talents might be going overlooked in the workplace. However, we imagine that only a small fraction of you ever had this epiphany while putting airbrushed tank tops on hangers in a souvenir T-shirt joint on the boardwalk. Thanks to Angelina, though, we can now all empathize with her plight. She's sort of like the Erin Brockovich of Shore Store.
7. "#### are coming out tonight." —JWOWW
[No other comment necessary, right? BTW, this outfit would later lead to the party in Pauly D's pants.]
6. "Time to get some Ron Ron Juice in my system." —Ronnie
We couldn't agree more! Budding mixologists, take note: Ron Ron Juice contains watermelon slices, cherries, ice, some cranberry juice, a few splashes of Body Heat by BODman cologne, a teaspoon of indoor tanning lotion, a liquor of your choosing, and some Nonoxynol-9 for good measure.
5. "Holy ####, I think I've got pinkeye." —Vinnie
Poor Vinnie didn't have much to do in last night's episode, but after freaking an overweight woman (one, mind you, who was smart enough not to sign a release form to use her image) at club Karma, he woke up with pinkeye. As Ronnie explained to him the next morning, "That's what you get for putting a fat girl's ### in your face." Truer words have never been spoken. Pinkeye is the new swine flu.
[side Note: We sincerely hope someone at the venerable Johnson & Johnson company was paying attention when someone (we're not sure who) said, "We gotta get Purell in this house" in the wake of the pinkeye incident. Sounds like a perfect sponsorship opportunity; don't let it go to waste. Makers of Plan B, that goes for you, too.]
4. "It only takes nine pounds of pressure to break a nose." —Pauly D
Move over Jonathan Lipnicki, there's a new obscure fact-spewing guido in town! Also, considering that the human head weighs eight pounds, this factoid passes the common-sense sniff test.
3. "I feel like eating ham and drinking water. Ham. [*raspberry noise*]" —JWOWW
After cheating on her boyfriend for the second night in a row, JWOWW decided it was time to pull the ripcord and get her late-night munchies on. Entering the confessional room with a fistful of Deli Fresh ham — yet another sponsorship opportunity that MTV failed to seize! — she instantly ushered in a new era of carb-free late-night snacking. Genius.
2. "I will cut your hair while you're sleeping." —Angelina
In the hierarchy of Things That Guidos Care About, there are only a few items that supercede their hair: their fake tans, their muscles, and their mothers. However, Mike "the Situation" nearly got his precious do scalped after insulting his housemate Angelina "Jolie" by telling her she needed to lose five or ten pounds. Sadly, Angelina never followed through on her promise. Well, at least not in this episode. Fingers crossed for retaliation in a future episode!
1. "I love the Situation." —Mike "the Situation"
And now, so does America! You see, our boy Mike has dubbed himself "the Situation," which provides him with the opportunity to lift up his shirt and display his rippling abdominal muscles at a moment's notice simply by asking women, "Do you love the Situation?" while pointing at his six-pack. You might think this outright display of peacocking wouldn't work in a post-Mystery world, but surprisingly, it works like gangbusters. Not only do women coo and fawn in his presence, he was able to sell multiple factions of guidettes booty shorts emblazoned with his catchphrase, quickly proving himself to be one of America's all-time greatest salesmen. Could "I love the Situation" be the new "Eat my shorts, man"? Quite possibly!
Honorable Mentions: "Don't bring dirty girls back." — Uncredited; "I don't give a #### if you're fat, you're ugly, you're 45 years old, I'll dance with you." — Vinnie; "I wanna pound out every girl in Seaside." — Ronnie
Jersey Shore’s Top Ten Catchphrase Countdown
Way back in 2003, MTV produced an episode of its long-running True Life series called "I Have a Summer Share." In it, the world was introduced to Tommy and Anthony, two North Jersey goombas who spent their summer weekends traveling 75 exits down the Garden State Parkway from Whippany to the breathtaking trashy paradise of Seaside Heights on the Jersey Shore, a town Tommy dubbed "the biggest meat market in the world." Considering the show reached the sort of sublime heights rarely seen in the reality-television world, it's shocking that it took the brain trust at MTV some six years to realize that there was so much voyeuristic awesomeness on display during that solitary hour of television that they should make a whole series out of it. Well, the network finally got their act together and debuted not one but two hour-long episodes of Jersey Shore last night. Over the course of those 120 minutes, no less than ten stunning new catchphrases were born. So won't you join along as we count them down?
10. "Anybody know how to peel garlic?" —Mike "the Situation"
After a lifetime of growing up in Italian households, you would think that someone in the cast of eight guidos and guidettes would've hovered over their mothers' shoulders at one point and learned how to peel garlic. Sadly, you would be wrong.
9. "You have your penis pierced. I love it." —Jenni "JWOWW"
After housemates Pauly D and Jenni "JWOWW" found themselves a little bit buzzed and falling prey to the always romantic strains of house music at club Karma [side Note: We're strongly considering hitting up Google Maps and making a road trip there this weekend], they made their way back to the share and started making out. It was there and then that we learned that "the party's in Pauly D's pants tonight" (his words, not ours), and that said party was pierced.
8. "I feel like this is beneath me. I'm a bartender. I do great things." —Angelina "Jolie"
We've all been in a position at one time or another when we've felt like our unique talents might be going overlooked in the workplace. However, we imagine that only a small fraction of you ever had this epiphany while putting airbrushed tank tops on hangers in a souvenir T-shirt joint on the boardwalk. Thanks to Angelina, though, we can now all empathize with her plight. She's sort of like the Erin Brockovich of Shore Store.
7. "#### are coming out tonight." —JWOWW
[No other comment necessary, right? BTW, this outfit would later lead to the party in Pauly D's pants.]
6. "Time to get some Ron Ron Juice in my system." —Ronnie
We couldn't agree more! Budding mixologists, take note: Ron Ron Juice contains watermelon slices, cherries, ice, some cranberry juice, a few splashes of Body Heat by BODman cologne, a teaspoon of indoor tanning lotion, a liquor of your choosing, and some Nonoxynol-9 for good measure.
5. "Holy ####, I think I've got pinkeye." —Vinnie
Poor Vinnie didn't have much to do in last night's episode, but after freaking an overweight woman (one, mind you, who was smart enough not to sign a release form to use her image) at club Karma, he woke up with pinkeye. As Ronnie explained to him the next morning, "That's what you get for putting a fat girl's ### in your face." Truer words have never been spoken. Pinkeye is the new swine flu.
[side Note: We sincerely hope someone at the venerable Johnson & Johnson company was paying attention when someone (we're not sure who) said, "We gotta get Purell in this house" in the wake of the pinkeye incident. Sounds like a perfect sponsorship opportunity; don't let it go to waste. Makers of Plan B, that goes for you, too.]
4. "It only takes nine pounds of pressure to break a nose." —Pauly D
Move over Jonathan Lipnicki, there's a new obscure fact-spewing guido in town! Also, considering that the human head weighs eight pounds, this factoid passes the common-sense sniff test.
3. "I feel like eating ham and drinking water. Ham. [*raspberry noise*]" —JWOWW
After cheating on her boyfriend for the second night in a row, JWOWW decided it was time to pull the ripcord and get her late-night munchies on. Entering the confessional room with a fistful of Deli Fresh ham — yet another sponsorship opportunity that MTV failed to seize! — she instantly ushered in a new era of carb-free late-night snacking. Genius.
2. "I will cut your hair while you're sleeping." —Angelina
In the hierarchy of Things That Guidos Care About, there are only a few items that supercede their hair: their fake tans, their muscles, and their mothers. However, Mike "the Situation" nearly got his precious do scalped after insulting his housemate Angelina "Jolie" by telling her she needed to lose five or ten pounds. Sadly, Angelina never followed through on her promise. Well, at least not in this episode. Fingers crossed for retaliation in a future episode!
1. "I love the Situation." —Mike "the Situation"
And now, so does America! You see, our boy Mike has dubbed himself "the Situation," which provides him with the opportunity to lift up his shirt and display his rippling abdominal muscles at a moment's notice simply by asking women, "Do you love the Situation?" while pointing at his six-pack. You might think this outright display of peacocking wouldn't work in a post-Mystery world, but surprisingly, it works like gangbusters. Not only do women coo and fawn in his presence, he was able to sell multiple factions of guidettes booty shorts emblazoned with his catchphrase, quickly proving himself to be one of America's all-time greatest salesmen. Could "I love the Situation" be the new "Eat my shorts, man"? Quite possibly!
Honorable Mentions: "Don't bring dirty girls back." — Uncredited; "I don't give a #### if you're fat, you're ugly, you're 45 years old, I'll dance with you." — Vinnie; "I wanna pound out every girl in Seaside." — Ronnie
editor47
Footballguy
Sarnoff
Footballguy
He had a right to be pissed at her for ####-blocking him the night before by going up and staring at him, then saying stuff like 'how can you hook up with her when we have a thing going', then the next night hooking up with ronnnie. Pissed, not jealous, not crushed.And I would have punched ####-blocking Angelina "Jolie" in the face for coming up there and busting up the second round of whores.
Baloney Sandwich
Footballguy
Sammi>JWow>Snickers>Angelina
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parasaurolophus
Footballguy
I just taught my son how to fist pump like a champ.
AcerFC
Footballguy
Angelina is awful but no way snickers bumps her. She is beyond awful. I think Sammi is very cute. But then she opens her mouth
Frostillicus
Footballguy
Finally watched this. Even better than I hoped.
