Lying - Acceptable, Yes or No? (1 Viewer)

[Phil Elliott]

Depends if democrat or republican.

 

[lazyike]

Looks like some lying going on in the poll answers.

Not lying if they didn’t know they were being lied to. Even though that is hard to be to believe they didn’t.

 

[AAABatteries]

You don't need to assume, nor should you. I specifically stated the purpose of the poll. I placed it here in the PSF because I felt that inevitably it would become political. Case in point, your post.

So answer me please, is it acceptable, within your core values, to lie? 

Personally, I don't care if it's a little white lie or not, it is completely and wholly unacceptable. Even a little white lie from someone leads me to lose my trust in them. Period.

I think you need to clean up the OP to get any real value out of the thread.  I have no problem saying things that aren’t true in certain circumstances - several examples in the thread already.

It is thought provoking though - how do you define the difference between the person who on occasion lies to their advantage vs. the person that frequently lies to their advantage.  If I lie to the officer, “I wasn’t speeding” - lie to my boss, “I’ll be out, my Aunt Gertrude died” - lie to the homeless guy on the street corner, “Sorry, no money”.  Am I any different than lying politician?

 

[Gawain]

When my love swears that she is made of truth,

I do believe her, though I know she lies,

That she might think me some untutored youth,

Unlearnèd in the world’s false subtleties.

Thus vainly thinking that she thinks me young,

Although she knows my days are past the best,

Simply I credit her false-speaking tongue:

On both sides thus is simple truth suppressed.

But wherefore says she not she is unjust?

And wherefore say not I that I am old?

Oh, love’s best habit is in seeming trust,

And age in love loves not to have years told.

    Therefore I lie with her and she with me,

    And in our faults by lies we flattered be.

--W.S. Sonnet 138

Voted yes

 

[ignatiusjreilly]

I don't really feel like answering the poll, but I have to say that one of my pet peeves is when people say things like "Technically, I didn't lie." If you utter a statement and your intent is to mislead someone (think Aaron Rodgers saying he was "immunized"), IMO there is no moral difference whether or not your words were technically true.

 

[Joe Bryant]

Personally, I don't care if it's a little white lie or not, it is completely and wholly unacceptable. Even a little white lie from someone leads me to lose my trust in them. Period.

I can see how one would think that. But how do you reconcile that with

I get it though, those little white lies are necessary on occasion so as to not cause anyone else pain or undue suffering. 

 

[matuski]

All of us lie every day.

If you don't you are an a - hole.

 

[matuski]

Hey Matt how ya doing?

Great! You?

 

[matuski]

Hey Dad how did your day go?

Good son, tell me about your day!

 

[Ruffrodys05]

I can see how one would think that. But how do you reconcile that(?)

I struggle with telling white lies. I deal with it and do my best to accept it for what it is. I bear it so others don't suffer, even though to my core I feel it is wrong. That may seem like a reconciliation to you but it isn't to me. 

I know things aren't strictly this black and white in the real world. I just have such an inherent hatred for lying that is difficult for me to get past. This is my issue and I own it.

 

[steelerfan1]

Voted yes because of little white lies type of stuff mentioned.

Also, if an intruder breaks into my house and asks me if I’m the only one here and I say yes, while my wife and child are hiding upstairs, is that wrong?

 

[jm192]

What does acceptable even mean?

Am I "ok" with it?  No.  Is there something I can do about politicians that lie?  Of course not.

If your kid does something unacceptable, you punish them.  If you do something unacceptable at your job--there is a consequences.  I can say "Lying is unacceptable."  But it doesn't matter.  Politicians gonna keep on doing it.

 

[LawFitz]

So a situation came up - friend of ours had a new baby and named the child a name that we had considered and laughed at because we thought it was so awful.  On first visit the new mother asked "Isn't that name precious?"  We, of course, lied about liking the name.

Compare that with your statement and tell my why it was completely and wholly unacceptable.

You could've just agreed that it's precious (without lying). 

 

[MAC_32]

All of us lie every day.

If you don't you are an a - hole.

Yeah, there's a scale on what you can lie about and what you shouldn't with a grey area in between. As one takes on more responsibility the impact on those lies grows and the decision making process is unavoidable. And it isn't always direct lies; it's usually dancing around the truth. 

 

[Joe Bryant]

I struggle with telling white lies. I deal with it and do my best to accept it for what it is. I bear it so others don't suffer, even though to my core I feel it is wrong. That may seem like a reconciliation to you but it isn't to me. 

I know things aren't strictly this black and white in the real world. I just have such an inherent hatred for lying that is difficult for me to get past. This is my issue and I own it.

Thanks. What I meant was how you can see them as "completely and wholly unacceptable" but also "necessary on occasion."

That's what I didn't understand.

 

[Ruffrodys05]

Thanks. What I meant was how you can see them as "completely and wholly unacceptable" but also "necessary on occasion."

That's what I didn't understand.

Ok, let me come at this another way. Lies told to me vs the lies I tell.

I don't want little white lies to be told to me. Ever. The truth hurts in many different ways but I want to be told the truth no matter how much that truth may hurt me. I guess I'm a bit different than most folks as I'd prefer the pain of a truth vs the attempt to spare my feelings of a little white lie. In my experience the pain and hurt of discovering I was lied to, even in an attempt to spare my feelings, hurts much worse than just telling me the truth in the first place.

However I will admit, on very rare occasions, I will tell a little white lie to spare anothers feelings. I struggle to find reconciliation between these instances of being lied to and being the lier. Because I abhor lies, even little white lies, being told to me I find it extremely difficult to lie to others. When I encounter a situation where I might have to tell that little white lie I only do so when I feel I have no other choice. It's never simple or easy for me.

My feelings on this whole issue of lying may seem strange to a lot of folks. I'm okay with that. The whole point of my poll was an attempt, a poor one at that, to try to find out how others felt about lying. It seems so prevalent in today's society. Everywhere I look. So, I find myself wondering if I'm the only one who feels the way I do about it. I think I am.

 

[Joe Bryant]

Ok, let me come at this another way. Lies told to me vs the lies I tell.

I don't want little white lies to be told to me. Ever. The truth hurts in many different ways but I want to be told the truth no matter how much that truth may hurt me. I guess I'm a bit different than most folks as I'd prefer the pain of a truth vs the attempt to spare my feelings of a little white lie. In my experience the pain and hurt of discovering I was lied to, even in an attempt to spare my feelings, hurts much worse than just telling me the truth in the first place.

However I will admit, on very rare occasions, I will tell a little white lie to spare anothers feelings. I struggle to find reconciliation between these instances of being lied to and being the lier. Because I abhor lies, even little white lies, being told to me I find it extremely difficult to lie to others. When I encounter a situation where I might have to tell that little white lie I only do so when I feel I have no other choice. It's never simple or easy for me.

My feelings on this whole issue of lying may seem strange to a lot of folks. I'm okay with that. The whole point of my poll was an attempt, a poor one at that, to try to find out how others felt about lying. It seems so prevalent in today's society. Everywhere I look. So, I find myself wondering if I'm the only one who feels the way I do about it. I think I am.

Thanks. I think lots of people feel like you do. I think the poll is tough as there are different types of lies. A white like of not saying something or softening something in order not to hurt someone's feelings is a different animal than a lie meant to hurt someone.

I was mainly confused with how you could see them as "completely and wholly unacceptable" but also "necessary on occasion."

I think lots of people would agree they see white lies as "something I very much dislike and tried to avoid whenever possible but are also necessary on occasion."

 

[MAC_32]

I generally don't bend the truth with those I trust - friends, family, coworkers, etc. I want to hear it straight and I hope our relationship is strong enough that I can do the same with them. If anything, to a fault.

That is a vastly different approach and dynamic than when venturing outside of that circle. 

 

[psychobillies]

I don't trust people who feel the need to tell me how honest they are.

 

[Ruffrodys05]

I don't trust people who feel the need to tell me how honest they are.

I think I'd kind of agree with you there. Although, I've never come across anyone who actually did that. I suppose I could relate it to someone who brags incessantly about everything therefore I don't believe anything they say. I've come across those types of individuals. That's a form of lying I see no legitimate purpose for.

 

[Joe Bryant]

I knew an old guy that would say, "Always tell the truth. But you don't have to always be telling everything that's true."

Some wisdom there.