Michigan Senate Passes Bill Making Oral and Anal Sex Punishable (1 Viewer)

[bosoxs45]

wait,what?

 

[Sweet J]

Good job, America.

 

[General Malaise]

Anal sex should be illegal. It really hurts.

 

[heckmanm]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

 

[heckmanm]

Also:

IF BJs ARE OUTLAWED, ONLY OUTLAWS WILL HAVE BJs!!!

 

[Van Dyman]

MI Senate is nutz, has been for a few years.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Link on the story that works

 

[The General]

Can't figure out drinking water but got the sex stuff all squared away.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

That seems to be correct.

And yeah, it isn't quite as outrageous as it sounded at first, but it is still quite idiotic.

 

[McGarnicle]

If anal sex is punishable by jail time, I mean, it just doesn't get any more ironic than that.

 

[parrot]

If anal sex is punishable by jail time, I mean, it just doesn't get any more ironic than that.

It's like when you sneak a cigarette and your dad says "NOW YOU'RE GONNA SMOKE THE WHOLE PACK!"

 

[The General]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

Is bestiality a huge problem in Michigan?

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

If anal sex is punishable by jail time, I mean, it just doesn't get any more ironic than that.

 

[Foosball God]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

Is bestiality a huge problem in Michigan?

Neigh

 

[timschochet]

People are getting sick in Flint and this is what they're doing?

 

[IvanKaramazov]

If anal sex is punishable by jail time, I mean, it just doesn't get any more ironic than that.

 

[Sweet J]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

That seems to be correct.

And yeah, it isn't quite as outrageous as it sounded at first, but it is still quite idiotic.

It's horribly idiotic. One has to question why this was even in the law in the first place. It COULD have just outlawed sex between man and dog. But it didn't. It outlawed sex between man and man. For a reason. No reason to reward a crappy law by just making more stuff to outlaw.

Get rid of the whole law. If that means they have to start over with an animal abuse law next year, so be it.

Stupid republicans.

 

[Baloney Sandwich]

Looks like the MI Senate is the only thing allowed to suck in that state

 

[Koya]

WTF Michigan. I used to think you were cool.

Ok, that's a lie, but not this ####### ###-backward. Seriously, that's Mississippi or West Virginia like ####.

 

[Henry Ford]

"Any attempt to regulate guns is useless. Criminals will get them anyway. Now, let's regulate what orifice people use for sexual pleasure."

 

[heckmanm]

Also:

IF BJs ARE OUTLAWED, ONLY UNMARRIED OUTLAWS WILL HAVE BJs!!!

Fixed my own post

 

[Koya]

Is ATM considered one crime, or two?

Too soon?

 

[xulf]

Is ATM considered one crime, or two?

Too soon?

Person or animal? Who is giving and who is receiving? More details please...be very thorough (include what you are wearing).

 

[Tom Servo]

Is ATM considered one crime, or two?

Too soon?

Person or animal? Who is giving and who is receiving? More details please...be very thorough (include what you are wearing).

Pictures, too.

 

[Tom Hagen]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

WTF goes on in Michigan that they are worried about stronger bestiality laws?

 

[Harry Manback]

People are getting sick in Flint and this is what they're doing?

Yes Tim, the government is just a single branch, only capable of working on one thing and nothing else. They chose this.

 

[General Malaise]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

WTF goes on in Michigan that they are worried about stronger bestiality laws?

Have you ever watched an episode of Hardcore Pawn?

 

[heckmanm]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

WTF goes on in Michigan that they are worried about stronger bestiality laws?

Have you ever watched an episode of Hardcore Prawn?

FYP

 

[apalmer]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

Is bestiality a huge problem in Michigan?

I hear wolverines are pretty popular there.

 

[Ramblin Wreck]

Sparty did bend the Wolverines over pretty good on Saturday

 

[heckmanm]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

WTF goes on in Michigan that they are worried about stronger bestiality laws?

From RL's link

The package requires nonprofit animal shelters to run a criminal background check on anyone attempting to adopt an animal.

The package requires nonprofit shelters to deny an adoption to anyone who has been convicted of animal abuse within the past five years. It also requires that convicted animal abusers are prohibited from adopting another animal for five years.

Among the bills in the Logan's Law package — named for a Siberian husky who died tragically after acid was intentionally poured on him — is Senate Bill 219, by GOP Sen. Rick Jones. In addition to barring convicted animal abusers from owning pets for five years, SB 219 would update language in the state's ban on bestiality and sodomy...

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

The package requires nonprofit animal shelters to run a criminal background check on anyone attempting to adopt an animal.

This sounds like a good idea, at first. Then I wondered how much that costs and whether it would result in a substantial decrease in the number of animals being adopted and, therefore, an increase in the number of animals being destroyed.

When you weigh that against the number of serial animal abusers that are adopting animals from shelters (how big can that number be?), I can't help but think maybe this whole bill (not just the part outlawing fun sex between humans) is a piece of junk.

 

[BigSteelThrill]

Republican

 

[Koya]

I guess it makes sense that you want to make sure a pet owner would be responsible before just letting anyone adopt - terrible to think that some people are not to be trusted with an animal.

Though, it's not very fair if you can't pass the test and therefore can't get a guard dog. Guess you'll have to stick with the one thing that is easiest to get your hands on without any requirements, assault weapons.

 

[RedmondLonghorn]

Guess you'll have to stick with the one thing that is easiest to get your hands on without any requirements, assault weapons.

They don't need vaccinations, don't poop in the yard and won't hump your Aunt Bernice's leg at Thanksgiving.

 

[Koya]

Guess you'll have to stick with the one thing that is easiest to get your hands on without any requirements, assault weapons.

They don't need vaccinations, don't poop in the yard and won't hump your Aunt Bernice's leg at Thanksgiving.

2/3 ain't bad.

 

[dozer]

That does it. My wife and I will not be celebrating my birthday in Michigan.

 

[JerseyToughGuys]

This blows my mind. I wonder if they slipped it in the backdoor somehow.

 

[Koya]

That does it. My wife and I will not be celebrating my birthday in Michigan.

Strap-ons count?

 

[timschochet]

People are getting sick in Flint and this is what they're doing?

Yes Tim, the government is just a single branch, only capable of working on one thing and nothing else. They chose this.

Whatever. It looks very bad for them to be working on stuff like this while Flint is still suffering.

 

[Baloney Sandwich]

People are getting sick in Flint and this is what they're doing?

Yes Tim, the government is just a single branch, only capable of working on one thing and nothing else. They chose this.

Whatever. It looks very bad for them to be working on stuff like this while Flint is still suffering.

they are not still suffering, Hillary left last night

 

[Zow]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

Is bestiality a huge problem in Michigan?

Neigh

Doggonit, I think it's time we put some of these legislators out to pasture.

 

[Franknbeans]

isn't anal sex punishment enough?

 

[Koya]

isn't anal sex punishment enough?

Isn't that the whole point?

 

[CBusAlex]

I'll reserve judgment on this bill until I hear Wet Dream's opinion.

 

[Fennis]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

Is bestiality a huge problem in Michigan?

Neigh

Doggonit, I think it's time we put some of these legislators out to pasture.

that's a baaaaaaad pun.

 

[jon_mx]

People are getting sick in Flint and this is what they're doing?

Yes Tim, the government is just a single branch, only capable of working on one thing and nothing else. They chose this.

Whatever. It looks very bad for them to be working on stuff like this while Flint is still suffering.

Why doesn't Obama declare flint a state of emergency and offer aid?

 

[Homer J Simpson]

People are getting sick in Flint and this is what they're doing?

Yes Tim, the government is just a single branch, only capable of working on one thing and nothing else. They chose this.

Whatever. It looks very bad for them to be working on stuff like this while Flint is still suffering.

Why doesn't Obama declare flint a state of emergency and offer aid?

He did that several weeks ago.

 

[JerseyToughGuys]

Really sucky. There's a gaping hole in our democracy right now.

 

[Zow]

Not quite as idiotic as it reads at first. The way I understood it

• Existing law applies both to sex between people and bestiality
• Existing law was already declared unconstitutional w/r/t consensual human secks in 2003, so only the bestiality portions are actually enforceable
• They're trying to strengthen the law to prevent animal abusers from having pets
• If they try to modify the law to remove the unconstitutional parts, they expect a big fight from conservatives who can't be seen as voting for teh homoes (despite the law already being found unconstitutional)
• In order to get the animal-protection parts into effect with the least delay, they're leaving the rest of the wording in there and will continue to ignore/not enforce it.

I'm getting errors trying to open the link, so this may already be covered there.

Is bestiality a huge problem in Michigan?

Neigh

Doggonit, I think it's time we put some of these legislators out to pasture.

that's a baaaaaaad pun.

But I didn't even mention all the defendants that out are on the lam(b) until this law changes.