My dad died, estate BS ensues....... (1 Viewer)

[Idiot Boxer]

Do you still have my number Cav?

 

[GoBirds]

long post I did not finish......

Didn't really want to start this but so fed up with the BS.........just need help how to deal with things the best.

Four kids, from oldest to youngest (brother(money wise well off), sister(ok), sister(ok), me(FBG)) My dad had a will, and my youngest sister is executor. My dad came back from cancer once and died 5 years later.

This is not a big estate, under 50K and life insurance is being sent directly to kids at 25% each as my mom died in 2009 and was beneficiary.

My sisters live at "home" where my dad was PA, my brother lives in DC and me NC.

Now big bro always thought he was going to be executor, I told him a year ago he wasn't but he did not seem to process it. My dad told me exactly what he is will was years ago (he wanted to make sure I didn't think he love me less because the girls were getting more, I understood).

Dad dies, I and coming from NC and have to bring the dog, so I say in a pet friendly hotel, my brother is already in Pittsburg cause his MIL just died and stays in at my dad's.

I probably given too much info, sorry it is personal. Cut to the chase or not.

About two years ago, I heard from oldest sister that my brothers friend wanted the house for his daughter when he died(brother does not know anyone else knows this)........Pissed me off. He was doing well then.

Bro is 10 years older than me. He emailed me the day before the funeral that friend's daughter was going to stay at dad's during the funeral to make sure no one broke in and took out the copper pipes. (yes this is all true). I told him that he had good neighbors they would make sure everything was ok, his response was the neighbors might not know he died. Okay? I told him I was not comfortable with someone I did not know being there before that family had a chance to be there. He was not happy with that. He told people that girl was like his daughter, all siblings had never heard her name before then. He ended up through the whole house without anyone else there while he was staying there. He kept bring that point of stealing copper pipes until BIL let him know (well then how would the pipe stealers know if neighbors didn't), anyway the neighbors show at the funeral home and my BIL nailed him in the face when he said "how do we know the neighbor's know he died" BIL, "they came here and paid their respects")

Brother calls me today and asked me if I talked with ex. sister recently, I said no. She talked with my wife last night not me, not big on the phone. He proceeds to tell me that she did not open a trust account yet(she did), that she put the house on sell for too much money (I said I think she put it at what the relator suggested, then he said they make money by just listing properties (WTF)can't make this #### up) and we should take any offer that we get.

Only other thing not suggested I can think of is if he keeps pushing, suggest maybe he's right and lets get an appraisal of the property to confirm. This takes the pressure off the siblings to decide and once you find a buyer the property will have to appraise for the sales amount for their loan to be approved anyways so it will help you price realistically and hopefully sell quickly to have this behind you.

 

[IC FBGCav]

[SIZE=medium]Thank everyone for the kind thoughts![/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]It might all be over.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]Thanks Bro, I'll politely back off and chill, UR[/SIZE]

[SIZE=10pt]Subject: RE: : [/SIZE]

[SIZE=small]Chris has already filed taxes. I don't know lawyers schedule and last time I [/SIZE][SIZE=small]read the paper there is a lot of illegal activity in NC. But[/SIZE][SIZE=small]I'm sure he didn't forget about me. I know bills, mortgagee etc need paid and [/SIZE][SIZE=small]are being paid via automatic draft how he had it set up. The bank is aware of [/SIZE][SIZE=small]his passing and they know we will be opening estate soon and will continue [/SIZE][SIZE=small]processing all drafts until estate acct open. As far as the car yes I will be [/SIZE][SIZE=small]buying it. As far as the house I'm not giving it away. The realtor was very [/SIZE][SIZE=small]prepared and did her homework in pricing. It's been on the market one week. [/SIZE][SIZE=small]There is no hurry to give it away like it's been on the market for six months if [/SIZE][SIZE=small]worse comes to worse I'll rent it. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=small]I don’t see how any of the above is telling you to f-off[/SIZE]

[SIZE=small]The will states the executor has the right to [/SIZE][SIZE=small]make all decisions on estate and don't need majority. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=small]Legally correct.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=small]I would most certainly ask [/SIZE][SIZE=small]all my siblings their opinion on any and all offers. [/SIZE]

[SIZE=small]That is what I would expect.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=small]He's only been dead three [/SIZE][SIZE=small]weeks and it seems there's a panic here. I've done everything I'm supposed to [/SIZE][SIZE=small]do in a timely fashion including cleaning out bedrooms, moving furniture out, [/SIZE][SIZE=small]packing etc spent an exhausting six hours there Saturday. I don't know what more [/SIZE][SIZE=small]you want me to do at this point?[/SIZE]

[SIZE=small]Is this what you it offends you? I don’t see it like that but it does not matter how I see.[/SIZE]

[SIZE=11pt]Sent:[/SIZE][SIZE=11pt] 02/06/2014 2:30 PM

Subject: RE: : [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]I sent about 6 emails of our conversations leading up to the one I just sent you basically telling me to f-off[/SIZE]

[SIZE=10pt]Sent: Thursday, February 06, 2014 2:28 PM

Subject: Fwd: : [/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium] This is what I sent you last night. What am I missing?[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]-----Original Message-----

Sent: Wednesday, February 5, 2014 08:34 PM

Subject: Re: :

Yeah, I know I sent her the signs. lol. What are you concerns? Seems like she is doing well. [/SIZE]

 

[johnnycakes]

Too much crap for me to read, but let me sum it up this way... the executrix is the executrix. She has a fiduciary duty to act in the best interest of all beneficiaries. All the friends and so forth... people outside the family... irrelevant. Your dad may not have been as stupid as everyone thinks he was by naming the executrix he did. just make sure she isn't raiding the till for her own benefit and acting in the best interest of the legitimate beneficiaries, and screw everyone else.

 

[matuski]

Am I the only one that can't make a bit of sense out of that last mess?

 

[Bogeys]

Am I the only one that can't make a bit of sense out of that last mess?

I think we are missing parts of the conversation.

 

[sbonomo]

sorry for your loss....I could not imagine fighting over my parents estate with my brothers. I am currently the executor of my parents estate. I could not imagine trying to take something away from them. Sounds like your sister is doing the right thing...keep supporting her.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Sorry to hear about your dad, GB.

My uncle died last year, and it has been nothing but drama between my cousins. People are stupid. glll with the rest of the process. It's probably only going to get dumber from here.

 

[KCitons]

Sorry for your loss.

It's been three years since their Dad passed, my wife and SIL haven't said more than a few passing words. (they work 20 feet apart from each other)

 

[Mr.Pack]

Sorry for your loss Cav.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

Sorry for your loss. Kneecap that other mother ####er.