Pictures and items of lost loved ones - What do I do with them? (1 Viewer)

[STEADYMOBBIN 22]

My mom downsized and brought over about 6 Tupperware of framed pictures, diplomas and the like from my deceased brothers.

I imagine she left them for me for the same reason Im asking you guys... WTF do I do with this stuff? I have my brothers birth pictures, kindergarten diplomas for Christ sake.

Do I throw that away? Do I just keep a few pictures? Do I keep it in a box until I die? I love and miss them but I cant bare look at this stuff.

I honestly dont know what to do.

What do you guys do or plan to do with stuff like this?

 

[STEADYMOBBIN 22]

If I throw it away I feel like Im throwing my brothers life away.

Maybe I just stuff it all in the attic in a far away corner.

 

[belljr]

I have a shelf in my storage area for family "heirlooms" that aren't worth displaying. Probably need to purge a little of it but we've used it a lot to grab pictures for random things (funerals, retirements, big birthdays etc)

 

[Osaurus]

Scan up the stuff you want to keep and throw it on a digital frame? Pitch the rest and then what you scanned after that.

 

[Snoopy]

Scan up the stuff you want to keep and throw it on a digital frame? Pitch the rest and then what you scanned after that.

Digital media doesn't last forever. I would find a place to store the items for sometime in the future.

 

[Mitchie]

Everyone's different but went through this recently and kept a small portion of my favorite ones, and tossed the rest.

 

[IvanKaramazov]

Someone is going to toss them at some point. All of us will be remembered by our kids, most of us will be remembered by our grandkids, and that's about it.

Easier said than done, but I'd remind myself that throwing out some mementos of my brothers doesn't remove their memory, and they probably wouldn't have wanted you to cling to stuff just to cling. I like the "keep your favorites and pitch the rest" suggestion. I know I'm probably in the minority on this.

 

[Sand]

Scan everything and store it in the attic. You can always store pictures on Amazon or Onedrive, etc.

 

[Runkle]

Don't think of it as tossing a lot of their stuff, think of it as curating a small collection. Keep the most sentimental 1%.

 

[AAABatteries]

Scan it all, store the most important and then sit with a whiskey and relive the memories one last time before you downsize the rest.

 

[northern exposure]

I guess I'm in the minority, but I think you have to keep the stuff while your Mom is alive or at least talk to her about it.
Your Mom only gave you the things because she didn't have room in her new home. I think her expectation was you would keep things for her. It might be a tough conversation, but I think you have to ask her what she wants you to do with the items.

If you feel that throwing away things is like throwing your brothers' lives away, imagine if they were your children. That's how your Mom feels.

Maybe you can go through the things with your Mom. Reminisce about your brothers and downsize the collection.

 

[ChicoCat]

I guess I'm in the minority, but I think you have to keep the stuff while your Mom is alive or at least talk to her about it.
Your Mom only gave you the things because she didn't have room in her new home. I think her expectation was you would keep things for her. It might be a tough conversation, but I think you have to ask her what she wants you to do with the items.

If you feel that throwing away things is like throwing your brothers' lives away, imagine if they were your children. That's how your Mom feels.

Maybe you can go through the things with your Mom. Reminisce about your brothers and downsize the collection.

This.

Take a few photos that you like or are poignant points in your brothers lives, keep them out. If you have room to display them. then do so for your moms sake. That's what its about. After she passes....if you want to get rid of them, do so.

 

[rockaction]

northern exposure's post was awesome. If you were to ask me, I'd say that's what you should do.

 

[Clown Car]

I guess I'm in the minority, but I think you have to keep the stuff while your Mom is alive or at least talk to her about it.
Your Mom only gave you the things because she didn't have room in her new home. I think her expectation was you would keep things for her. It might be a tough conversation, but I think you have to ask her what she wants you to do with the items.

If you feel that throwing away things is like throwing your brothers' lives away, imagine if they were your children. That's how your Mom feels.

Maybe you can go through the things with your Mom. Reminisce about your brothers and downsize the collection.

I agree. If it isn’t a burden keep it until she passes.

 

[Mrs. Rannous]

You don't need to keep the frames. Reduction in volume is a help.

But you can scan this stuff and make a slide show she can look at on her phone or computer whenever she'd like. And whenever you'd like, for that matter. Just make sure you have copies of any photos that are important to any family history you have, and send them to branches of the family that may want them. I have original photos that date back to the 1880's, so those ones are important. (Please note who is in them. That mystery guest really needs to sign in.)

It can be a nice process if you take it that way.