Seinfeld: Kramer's Best Schemes (1 Viewer)

[Raider Nation]

George: Excuse me, I think I made a big mistake. I'd like my deposit back, please.Jiffy Park Guy: What's the problem?

George: You've got hookers turning tricks in my car, how's that for starters?

Jiffy Park Guy: Ah, that is all hearsay.

George: All right, very good. I'd like my car and deposit back, please.

Jiffy Park Guy: Can't do it.

George: What do you mean?

Jiffy Park Guy: If you read the agreement you signed, the deposit is non-refundable.

George: Well does it say anything in the contract about my car being used as a whorehouse? I don't remember reading that clause either.

Jiffy Park Guy: What can I tell you, buddy? Take it up with Consumer Affairs.

George: [frustrated] All right, just give me my car so I can get the hell out of here.

Jiffy Park Guy: That's going to be a problem.

George: Why?

Jiffy Park Guy: It's all the way in the back. We can't get it out for a couple of days.

George: What are you talking about? I want my car!

Jiffy Park Guy: We ask that you please bear with us.

George: Bear with you? This is a parking lot! People are supposed to be able to get their cars.

Jiffy Park Guy: Ideally.

 

[Scoresman]

Smoking Advocate - Stick around for 1:30, possibly the funniest Seinfeld moment ever.

That's not even the funniest "Kramer trying to smoke something moment". That goes to the "Here's to feeling good all the time" scene when he's trying to out someone in a bar as a drug user.

 

[Raider Nation]

Smoking Advocate - Stick around for 1:30, possibly the funniest Seinfeld moment ever.

That's not even the funniest "Kramer trying to smoke something moment". That goes to the "Here's to feeling good all the time" scene when he's trying to out someone in a bar as a drug user.

I'm hip.

 

[AAABatteries]

Detective 1

Smoking Advocate - Stick around for 1:30, possibly the funniest Seinfeld moment ever.

That's not even the funniest "Kramer trying to smoke something moment". That goes to the "Here's to feeling good all the time" scene when he's trying to out someone in a bar as a drug user.

 

[Dr. Octopus]

That goes to the "Here's to feeling good all the time" scene when he's trying to out someone in a bar as a drug user.

I had one of my favorite nights ever at that actual bar. I met a dude that out crazied Kramer.

 

[peaces]

Plaintiff

 

[Hov34]

Smoking Advocate - Stick around for 1:30, possibly the funniest Seinfeld moment ever.

That's not even the funniest "Kramer trying to smoke something moment". That goes to the "Here's to feeling good all the time" scene when he's trying to out someone in a bar as a drug user.

You may be right, I always think of the bloopers when I think for this scene:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MCFvZLjRPNg

 

[Despyzer]

"I'm getting rid of all my furniture. All of it. And I'm going to build these different levels, with steps, and it'll all be carpeted with a lot of pillows. You know, like ancient Egypt."

Not terribly funny, but I always liked the concept.

 

[Tusken Raider]

Movie Bootlegging Agent/Advocate

Kramer: "It's a perfectly legitimate business."

Jerry: "It's not legitimate!"

Kramer: "It's a... business."

 

[Hov34]

Hey.

 

[MC Gas Money]

Dr. Van Nostrand, Dermatologist

Dont forget proctology

And his formal training is in pediatrics

 

[ClownCausedChaos2]

When he hatched the scheme to lie about an Associates degree in order to get a position as an Assistant Manager at Advance America.

 

[ClownCausedChaos2]

That would actual make for a good game thread: "Sitcom Storyline or FFA Thread?"