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Things that only Happen in Florida! (3 Viewers)

Naked florida man arrested for biting police dog while high on meth

Last Friday in High Springs, Florida, police were called to a residence, where they found Donald Watts high on methamphetamine and rolling around in the mud in a ditch. He was also completely naked and making bird noises. 

When Watts spotted the cops, he punched one of them and failed to be deterred by stun guns. Accompanied by a K-9 officer named Casper, police found Watts in some woods nearby. He proceeded to get down on all fours and mimic the police dog, which he bit in the ear. 

Casper responded by biting Watts in the head, and Watts was finally arrested on multiple charges.

 
Lots of crazy stuff down here for sure.  But you can also see things like these guys or a stray gator or snappin turtle every now and then in your front yard.

https://imgur.com/a/Um4rhCj
If I go about an hour east of me, I can see elk in people’s front yard. I saw one yard with about 20 cows and one bull all standing around. Imagine waking up in the morning and navigate that on your way to work. 

 
This just happened a couple days ago about 5 miles from where I live. It sounds like something out of a Coen Bros movie.

Synopsis- home invasion, invaders torture victim for safe combo. He won't give it up. They cold #### him with a pistol after almost severing a finger. Load the safe into their pickup. As they make their getaway the safe falls out of the truck onto the victims driveway. 

Craziness!

 
6 years after the Wesley Chapel movie theatre shooting...a trial date is finally set.

DADE CITY — Six years after the infamous shooting inside a Pasco County movie theater, the second-degree murder case against Curtis Reeves Jr. has been set for trial.

Reeves, 77, {RETIRED TAMPA POLICE CAPTAIN} who shot Chad Oulson after an argument escalated inside the Cobb Grove 16 movie theaters over Oulson’s use of a cell phone during the previews, is scheduled to stand trial Oct. 5, 2020. Prosecutors and defense attorneys agreed it would likely take three weeks

 
6 years after the Wesley Chapel movie theatre shooting...a trial date is finally set.

DADE CITY — Six years after the infamous shooting inside a Pasco County movie theater, the second-degree murder case against Curtis Reeves Jr. has been set for trial.

Reeves, 77, {RETIRED TAMPA POLICE CAPTAIN} who shot Chad Oulson after an argument escalated inside the Cobb Grove 16 movie theaters over Oulson’s use of a cell phone during the previews, is scheduled to stand trial Oct. 5, 2020. Prosecutors and defense attorneys agreed it would likely take three weeks
That's not why we're here, chico.

 
Sweet 9 pound 8 ounce baby Jesus please tell me this is a comedian or schtick 

(Gene Frenette is a longtime local sportswriter known for his cluelessness and lack of social media savvy)

@GeneFrenette: No words for this video, but it is memorable. https://twitter.com/GeneFrenette/status/1256020789733842944/video/1

eta...sorry, totally satirical

@PinkyD124: #JacksonvilleLady 

YouTube channel 
http://shorturl.at/wxGW8 https://twitter.com/PinkyD124/status/1255890881271533569/video/1
Shared via TweetCaster

 
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Looking for houses to test Florida out in Boca, Palm Beach, Jupiter areas. Going to rent for 6-12 months and test the waters. If you told me 6.5 years when I started this thread that I would be looking for houses in Florida in the year 2020, would've given me a good chuckle. 

 
Looking to spend mid-June through late August in a coastal area (somewhere between VA & GA), preferably near an uncrowded beach. House must have a pool. Currently Outer Banks in NC is the front runner, but it does look like privacy is hard to come by there, which is important to us.

Shtick is welcome, but honest responses are appreciated, being that this is an area of the country I’m not very familiar with (on a hyper-local level).

TIA


Looking for houses to test Florida out in Boca, Palm Beach, Jupiter areas. Going to rent for 6-12 months and test the waters. If you told me 6.5 years when I started this thread that I would be looking for houses in Florida in the year 2020, would've given me a good chuckle. 
Totally confused. You buy jorts yet?

ETA. That Boca/Palm Beach/Jupiter area is an extremely affluent area. Very nice places. Just remember that Palm Beach county has been hit hard with covid19 and is one of 3 counties in state still in lockdown.

 
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Totally confused. You buy jorts yet?

ETA. That Boca/Palm Beach/Jupiter area is an extremely affluent area. Very nice places. Just remember that Palm Beach county has been hit hard with covid19 and is one of 3 counties in state still in lockdown.
We made the decision that we weren't heading back to NY, no reason to head north. When are malls going to reopen? I need to replace my iphone under Applecare, which expires next month. 

ETA: I'm in the Orlando area right now, so anything within an hour of here.

 
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Florida woman in labor stops long enough to vote.

The man explained his wife was outside in the car and wanted to cast her vote.

"I go, 'We need her here,' and he basically told me that's gonna be a problem because she refuses to go to the hospital until she votes," Briceno Gonzalez told WKMG-TV.

The man explained his wife was in labor and insisted on voting before going to the hospital.

Briceno Gonzalez said she initially took a mail-in ballot out to the woman, but she refused it.

"She said 'No, no, no, I need to fill it out right now," Briceno Gonzalez recalled.

Briceno Gonzalez waited while the woman completed the ballot.

"So the woman in labor filled out her ballot while doing a little controlled breathing," she told WESH-TV.

She admitted it was an unusual incident for elections employees.

"It was an odd situation, but she wanted to vote, and that was her right as an American citizen," Briceno Gonzalez said.
Apparently, @Clown Car needed to take care of her civic duty first.

 
Florida hacker changes governor's home address

Florida Gov. Ron DeSantis was initially unable to cast a ballot this week after his address was illegally changed online, authorities said. 

The episode put the state's online registration system into question and prompted the arrest of a 20-year-old man who now faces felony charges and admitted to accessing the voter information of other public figures and celebrities. 

The Republican governor was in Tallahassee to cast his ballot on Monday when he was told his address had been changed from the governor's mansion to 2815 Pretty Lane, the location of an apartment complex in West Palm Beach more than 400 miles away, according to online searches.

After the problem was fixed, DeSantis voted and the Florida Department of Law Enforcement was contacted. Investigators determined the address had been changed from a home in Naples, Fla., according to court documents obtained by Fox News. 

 
Miami dad arrested after taking 10yr old son to do a "paintball drive-by",  Son shot by a scared a resident

"Police say a 10-year-old boy approached his father with an unusual request: Could he take him to do a drive-by shooting in Opa-locka with a paint gun? The father, 26-year-old Michael Williams, agreed, detectives say.

Williams’ van pulled up to the house on the 2300 block of Rutland Street, and the boy began to shoot paint balls into the crowd, where some other young people were gathering in the front yard. But the resident, Gregory Barns, believed “he and his family were under attack” — and squeezed off one round with a real gun, wounding the boy on Sunday night, according to police."

The boy suffered a further injury after losing his balance and getting run over by the van, according to the police report. In the chaos, Williams got the boy, put him in the van and drove home, where the child’s mother called 911, police said."

 
Miami dad arrested after taking 10yr old son to do a "paintball drive-by",  Son shot by a scared a resident

"Police say a 10-year-old boy approached his father with an unusual request: Could he take him to do a drive-by shooting in Opa-locka with a paint gun? The father, 26-year-old Michael Williams, agreed, detectives say.

Williams’ van pulled up to the house on the 2300 block of Rutland Street, and the boy began to shoot paint balls into the crowd, where some other young people were gathering in the front yard. But the resident, Gregory Barns, believed “he and his family were under attack” — and squeezed off one round with a real gun, wounding the boy on Sunday night, according to police."

The boy suffered a further injury after losing his balance and getting run over by the van, according to the police report. In the chaos, Williams got the boy, put him in the van and drove home, where the child’s mother called 911, police said."
Early leader for "Father of the Year".

 
Florida man kills iguana; claims "stand your ground" defense.

In their motion, Patterson's attorneys Frank Vasconcelos and Carey Haughwout said their client was trying to save an iguana from getting run over by cars. When he brought it to safety, a crowd agitated the animal and it bit his right arm when he tried to move it, according to the motion. It says he then "kicked the iguana as far as he could." Patterson had to get 22 staples in his arm because of the bite, according to the motion.

"In this case, Patterson acted in a reasonable manner under all the circumstances because the wild iguana was first to engage with physical violence, during the encounter," his attorneys wrote.

 
There can be only one Florida Man

PASCO COUNTY, Fla. (WFLA) – Zephyrhills police have arrested a man they believe is responsible for robbing several businesses.

Police say early Sunday morning, a man identified as Lawrence Franklin King Florida stole everything from alcohol to pet medication.

Among the businesses he’s accused of robbing is Little Cat Rescue, a non-profit that helps stray and abandoned cats. The owner says she woke up to find cats running in her front yard.

“I went out and there was just cats out in the front and I thought, oh my gosh what’s going on and I look over at the facility and I see the door wide open and my heart just drops,” said Desiree Angel Ballard.

She then went into the building where she keeps her cats and found items strewn everywhere.

“Everything there on the top shelf had gone over there on the floor, all the meds were all over the place,” said Ballard who believes the thief was after pet medication she stores for her cats. “He took cat pain medication and some de-wormer. He will be tapeworm free for the next year,” said Ballard.

She was then shocked when detectives told her who they think is responsible for the break in. Ballard says Lawrence Florida lived across the street from her at one time and even volunteered at Little Cat Rescue.

“The Lawrence Florida they told me about is not the one, that’s not him,” said Ballard.

Police believe Florida also broke into Massey Barbershop and stole hair clippers. He’s also accused of breaking into Lisa’s Barbershop and stealing two pair of scissors.

Police say they believe he also broke into Carpet and Floor service, the Living Foods Bakery and Cafe, Zephyrhills Veterinary Clinic, and The Great Catch restaurant where the owner says he stole beer and White Claw.

“We have a back gate that he entered through and there is a large cooler that holds our beer and he took 27 cases of beer down to the ditch and dumped it into the ditch,” said George Illes, who can’t explain why Florida took the White Claw, “He took it next door to the mobile home park and left it there,” said Illes who says Florida worked for him at one time.

“Lawrence, he used to work for me last year. He was here for about eight months, he was a cook in the kitchen,” said Illes.

During a Post Miranda interview with officers, police say Florida admitted to breaking into all the above-listed locations and agreed to walk officers around to where he dumped the stolen items.

"He took cat pain medication and some de-wormer. He will be tapeworm free for the next year,” said Ballard."  :lmao:

 
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There can be only one Florida Man

PASCO COUNTY, Fla. (WFLA) – Zephyrhills police have arrested a man they believe is responsible for robbing several businesses.

Police say early Sunday morning, a man identified as Lawrence Franklin King Florida stole everything from alcohol to pet medication.

Among the businesses he’s accused of robbing is Little Cat Rescue, a non-profit that helps stray and abandoned cats. The owner says she woke up to find cats running in her front yard.

“I went out and there was just cats out in the front and I thought, oh my gosh what’s going on and I look over at the facility and I see the door wide open and my heart just drops,” said Desiree Angel Ballard.

She then went into the building where she keeps her cats and found items strewn everywhere.

“Everything there on the top shelf had gone over there on the floor, all the meds were all over the place,” said Ballard who believes the thief was after pet medication she stores for her cats. “He took cat pain medication and some de-wormer. He will be tapeworm free for the next year,” said Ballard.

She was then shocked when detectives told her who they think is responsible for the break in. Ballard says Lawrence Florida lived across the street from her at one time and even volunteered at Little Cat Rescue.

“The Lawrence Florida they told me about is not the one, that’s not him,” said Ballard.

Police believe Florida also broke into Massey Barbershop and stole hair clippers. He’s also accused of breaking into Lisa’s Barbershop and stealing two pair of scissors.

Police say they believe he also broke into Carpet and Floor service, the Living Foods Bakery and Cafe, Zephyrhills Veterinary Clinic, and The Great Catch restaurant where the owner says he stole beer and White Claw.

“We have a back gate that he entered through and there is a large cooler that holds our beer and he took 27 cases of beer down to the ditch and dumped it into the ditch,” said George Illes, who can’t explain why Florida took the White Claw, “He took it next door to the mobile home park and left it there,” said Illes who says Florida worked for him at one time.

“Lawrence, he used to work for me last year. He was here for about eight months, he was a cook in the kitchen,” said Illes.

During a Post Miranda interview with officers, police say Florida admitted to breaking into all the above-listed locations and agreed to walk officers around to where he dumped the stolen items.

"He took cat pain medication and some de-wormer. He will be tapeworm free for the next year,” said Ballard."  :lmao:
I can understand stealing scissors and cat pain medication.  But White Claw?

 

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