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Deadly Animal Draft (1 Viewer)

Help Wanted: GM for dominant deadly animal draft franchise. Must be ruthless, intelligent and willing to devote several hours a day. No experience necessary, but knowledge of Russian brides is a plus. Will train the right candidate. Salary not at all competitive. Superb benefits (front row seats to deathmatch). Apply via PM. Deadline is the time of my next selection.
You are a day late and a dollar short.And when you see Team SharkPool/SonnyLubick's next pick, you will want to quit. :shock:

You have been warned. :angry:

 
So far (through round 4), this lurker sees the division leaders as PoolShark, the rover, CourtJester, and either PAO or The Goat.

I keep trying to convince my wife that this thread is educational, and thus worth my time keeping up with it. She just does this... :rolleyes:

P.S. :) that the FINGERMONKEY has almost as many posts as i do, and will likely pass me before this thing ends.
You not only need more posts to equal the fingermonkey, but the monkey now has more credibility after your statement about divisional leaders:Siberian Tiger, Kodiak Bear and Sumatran Rhinoceros OWNS Grizzly Bear, Tazmanian Devil and Mountain Gorilla.

At this point the Tiger and Great Hammerhead would be a draw but after my next sea pick, it won't even be a contest.

You'll be all "Wow, that team is all radical"
I feel that you underestimate my sneakiness.
 
QUOTE (gorf @ Dec 4 2003, 08:12 AM)

Help Wanted: GM for dominant deadly animal draft franchise. Must be ruthless, intelligent and willing to devote several hours a day. No experience necessary, but knowledge of Russian brides is a plus. Will train the right candidate. Salary not at all competitive. Superb benefits (front row seats to deathmatch). Apply via PM. Deadline is the time of my next selection.
You are a day late and a dollar short.
Oh, I disagree. I have carefully reviewed all 58 pages of this thread, and I believe the best GM talent is still available. :yes:
 
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So far (through round 4), this lurker sees the division leaders as PoolShark, the rover, CourtJester, and either PAO or The Goat.
You Sir, are wise beyond your post total..... :thumbup: :thumbup: Ignore all the haters, they are just jealous of the team I have assembled....Who is up???
 
So far (through round 4), this lurker sees the division leaders as PoolShark, the rover, CourtJester, and either PAO or The Goat.
You Sir, are wise beyond your post total..... :thumbup: :thumbup: Ignore all the haters, they are just jealous of the team I have assembled....Who is up???
bigjay.I don't wan tto step on any feet here, but isn't this the point where a lurker could put a pick forward for bigjay....
 
I see Disco Stu lurking---Big Jay needs you Stu!!!(I just hope that Jay didn't PM a pick to the Commish earlier this morning) :confused:

 
QUOTE (gorf @ Dec 4 2003, 08:12 AM)

Help Wanted: GM for dominant deadly animal draft franchise. Must be ruthless, intelligent and willing to devote several hours a day. No experience necessary, but knowledge of Russian brides is a plus. Will train the right candidate. Salary not at all competitive. Superb benefits (front row seats to deathmatch). Apply via PM. Deadline is the time of my next selection.
You are a day late and a dollar short.
Oh, I disagree. I have carefully reviewed all 58 pages of this thread, and I believe the best GM talent is still available. :yes:
I laugh in your general direction...
 
QUOTE (gorf @ Dec 4 2003, 08:12 AM)

Help Wanted: GM for dominant deadly animal draft franchise. Must be ruthless, intelligent and willing to devote several hours a day. No experience necessary, but knowledge of Russian brides is a plus. Will train the right candidate. Salary not at all competitive. Superb benefits (front row seats to deathmatch). Apply via PM. Deadline is the time of my next selection.
You are a day late and a dollar short.
Oh, I disagree. I have carefully reviewed all 58 pages of this thread, and I believe the best GM talent is still available. :yes:
I laugh in your general direction...
YOUR PICK
 
QUOTE (gorf @ Dec 4 2003, 08:12 AM)

Help Wanted: GM for dominant deadly animal draft franchise. Must be ruthless, intelligent and willing to devote several hours a day. No experience necessary, but knowledge of Russian brides is a plus. Will train the right candidate. Salary not at all competitive. Superb benefits (front row seats to deathmatch). Apply via PM. Deadline is the time of my next selection.
You are a day late and a dollar short.
Oh, I disagree. I have carefully reviewed all 58 pages of this thread, and I believe the best GM talent is still available. :yes:
I laugh in your general direction...
No, he's right. But I'm far too busy. :cool:
 
QUOTE (gorf @ Dec 4 2003, 08:12 AM)

Help Wanted: GM for dominant deadly animal draft franchise. Must be ruthless, intelligent and willing to devote several hours a day. No experience necessary, but knowledge of Russian brides is a plus. Will train the right candidate. Salary not at all competitive. Superb benefits (front row seats to deathmatch). Apply via PM. Deadline is the time of my next selection.
You are a day late and a dollar short.
Oh, I disagree. I have carefully reviewed all 58 pages of this thread, and I believe the best GM talent is still available. :yes:
I laugh in your general direction...
YOUR PICK
:excited: Incoming!

 
Let's press on. I will make the pick for team Novax:

Double-wattled Southern Cassowary

A A Cassowary Poem

Somewhere I read that it was really mean and/or dangerous, but I cannot seem to find that now. But here's another llink
Thats the other man killer among birds.
On mainland Australia, the most recent

recorded fatality occurred in April 1926 when Phillip McClean

received an injury to the throat after running from a cassowary and

falling to the ground. Attacking cassowaries charge and kick,

sometimes jumping on top of the victim. Unlike emus, which

reputedly kick backwards, cassowaries can kick in a forward and

downward direction. They may also peck, barge or head- butt. The

commonest injuries they cause in humans are puncture wounds,

lacerations and bone fractures.
Each foot on the Cassowary has 3 forward pointing toes with strong claws to provide grip while running, the inner toe having a 12cm (5") long spike for defensive purposes when it kicks out when cornered.
They also are supposedly good swimmers.
After I read what pick the commish made for us, I almost wanted to thank him. People dont realize how vicous these flightless birds are. When people get up in their business, the Cassowary is like #####, please get outta my face before I kill you. The Cassowary then backs it up with this nasty Kung Fu which is like #####, I told you to get out of my business, now take this :thumbup: Very nice!
Agreed- thanks commish.
You are welcome, it was a proxy pick, not a penalty pick.
 
All Pokemon and Superman talk aside I have to think the whirlpool is it's only hope.

I stumbled on this little story while looking for any type of blue whale attack.Advantage Orca
Nice link. That blue whale isn't so tough now is it?
the business part of article cited above..."Around thirty Orcas of a transitory group was attacking a young sixty foot blue whale."

another example of confusion over plural/singular distinctions in wild & source material documentation leading to confusion in deathmatch projections for VBD.
Bryant, a draftnik from Mrs. Lindsay's First Grade Class, may be able to shed some light on the Killer Whale/Blue Whale debate:"The killer whale has powerful teeth and powerful jaws in the upper jaw. It sometimes eats penguins, seals, dolphins and large baleen whales. But it mainly eats fish like salmon and squid. More killer whales live in cooler waters like the North and South Pole. They can swim very fast, up to 30 miles per hour. When they dive, they usually go to 100-200 feet."

Bryant assumes, of course, that the reader knows a Blue Whale is a Baleen Whale (Balaenoptera musculus), and it's clear from Bryant's uses of the singular pronoun ("It sometimes eats . . .large baleen whales"; "It mainly eats fish . . . ") that a single Orca can easily eat a Blue Whale.

Thanks Bryant, back to the studio.
*"Bryant, a draftnik from Mrs. Lindsay's First Grade Class"*if you are going to whip out an authoritative cite like that... i stand corrected.

i hate name droppers.
Bryant must be one of those droolers. 30 Orcas. Enough said.
 
It is only the fear I hold for the next predator that could cause me to hold my breath longer than that of watching him drop to us.

While I appreciate a good-hearted tustle at times, a swift, merciless death is often the answer...just like our next pick dishes out. Given our current stable, and ferocity of the coming sleeper, I am officially accepting wagers to Animal Death Match.

Ladies (hide your children) and Brutalmen, I bring you the TERRIBLY FEROCIOUS, FEARLESS and ATTACKING, UNSCRUPULOUS KILLER...hailing from the HARSH and RUTHLESS ANTARCTIC.........the...

...............SEA LEOPARD!

a.k.a. the Leopard Seal!

http://www-new.aad.gov.au/default.asp?casid=1769

With huge, razor sharp teeth and an attitude to match, the Mighty Leopard Seal gladly takes on all comers. With the possible exception of an occasionally rogue, psycho Orca (arguably the #1 overall pick by "sharks"), there is nothing in this great sea of ours that the Leopard Seal calls its predator. NOTHING. Sorry, shark lovers...can't touch this. Even the Polar Bear won't take its shot!

Would you like to see how it addresses one of the bigger mammals roaming the Antarctic, the 5,000 lb. Elephant Seal? Head on, mouth wider than the Hyena or Lion, ready to go...see pic. Take note of not only the teeth, but compare the size of its mouth to that of the massive elephant seal. Be afraid...be very afraid.

A voracious predator, the fact that this loner needs no herd to hold onto...or good weather to bask in, tells you he'll handle ANYTHING...solo...a TRUE hunter -- with tremendous speed, agility, size and strength.

Here Barracuda...here barracuda...<whislte>...BAM! Good night. Other seals call this killer "The Executioner"...HE EATS THEM. Yep, Leopard Seal EATS other seals FOR LUNCH!

Talk about value...

Good day.

From Species.com:

"This long, slender seal has a huge head, with massive jaws and a tremendous gape. The general appearance is often described as reptilian. When the jaws are agape, it appears as though the whole animal has opened up."

"The leopard seal's dentition appears formidable, mainly because of the great length of the canines and the massiveness of the postcanines."

 
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JZilla Posted on Dec 4 2003, 12:07 PM--------------------------------------------------------------------------------Bryant must be one of those droolers. 30 Orcas. Enough said.
LOL at LJizza calling out a first grader.
 
It is only the fear I hold for the next predator that could cause me to hold my breath longer than that of watching him drop to us.

While I appreciate a good-hearted tustle at times, a swift, merciless death is often the answer...just like our next pick dishes out. Given our current stable, and ferocity of the coming sleeper, I am officially accepting wagers to Animal Death Match.

Ladies (hide your children) and Brutalmen, I bring you the TERRIBLY FEROCIOUS, FEARLESS and ATTACKING, UNSCRUPULOUS KILLER...hailing from the HARSH and RUTHLESS ANTARCTIC.........the...

...............SEA LEOPARD!

a.k.a. the Leopard Seal!

http://www-new.aad.gov.au/default.asp?casid=1769

With huge, razor sharp teeth and an attitude to match, the Mighty Leopard Seal gladly takes on all comers. With the possible exception of an occasionally rogue, psycho Orca (arguably the #1 overall pick by "sharks"), there is nothing in this great sea of ours that the Leopard Seal calls its predator. NOTHING. Sorry, shark lovers...can't touch this. Even the Polar Bear won't take its shot!

Would you like to see how it addresses one of the bigger mammals roaming the Antarctic, the 5,000 lb. Elephant Seal? Head on, mouth wider than the Hyena or Lion, ready to go...see pic. Take note of not only the teeth, but compare the size of its mouth to that of the massive elephant seal. Be afraid...be very afraid.

A voracious predator, the fact that this loner needs no herd to hold onto...or good weather to bask in, tells you he'll handle ANYTHING...solo...a TRUE hunter -- with tremendous speed, agility, size and strength.

Here Barracuda...here barracuda...<whislte>...BAM! Good night. Other seals call this killer "The Executioner"...HE EATS THEM. Yep, Leopard Seal EATS other seals FOR LUNCH!

Talk about value...

Good day.

From Species.com:

"This long, slender seal has a huge head, with massive jaws and a tremendous gape. The general appearance is often described as reptilian. When the jaws are agape, it appears as though the whole animal has opened up.

"The leopard seal's dentition appears formidable, mainly because of the great length of the canines and the massiveness of the postcanines."
donde esta: PIC?
 
NCCommish has his two picks in by proxy.

His first pick:

Pilot Whale

(Globicephala melaena) a toothed whale none of that plankton crap. Pilot Whales average 20 ft and 3 tons. Last big toothed whale, as big as any shark taken and bigger than any left.

His second pick:

Pacific Walrus

Walruses do not use their tusks to dig for food as is commonly believed. Rather, they use them for fighting and displays of dominance with other walruses, for defense against predators, as picks to pull themselves out of the water onto ice floes, and to kill and tear apart seals.

 
NCCommish has his two picks in by proxy.His first pick:Pilot Whale(Globicephala melaena) a toothed whale none of that plankton crap. Pilot Whales average 20 ft and 3 tons. Last big toothed whale, as big as any shark taken and bigger than any left.His second pick:Pacific WalrusWalruses do not use their tusks to dig for food as is commonly believed. Rather, they use them for fighting and displays of dominance with other walruses, for defense against predators, as picks to pull themselves out of the water onto ice floes, and to kill and tear apart seals.
Nice, a couple more snacks for Big Blue.
 
Ladies (hide your children) and Brutalmen, I bring you the TERRIBLY FEROCIOUS, FEARLESS and ATTACKING, UNSCRUPULOUS KILLER...hailing from the HARSH and RUTHLESS ANTARCTIC.........the...

...............SEA LEOPARD!

a.k.a. the Leopard Seal!
In all seriousness, Mrs. Lindsay's First Grade Class had the Leopard Seal as the next pick on their board.Anthony weighs in: "Leopard seals live in and around the Antarctic. It is a powerful hunter. It eats squid, krill, other seals and penguins. It can jump out of the water onto the ice to attack its prey. The leopard seal got its name because of the colors and spots on its fur."

 
His second pick:Pacific WalrusWalruses do not use their tusks to dig for food as is commonly believed. Rather, they use them for fighting and displays of dominance with other walruses, for defense against predators, as picks to pull themselves out of the water onto ice floes, and to kill and tear apart seals.
Wow, a big, fat giant slug with a couple of sharp pencils...
 
Mext pick, by proxy for the Rover:

Gray Wolf

The gray wolf is the largest wild canine. They are around 3 feet tall at the shoulder and are about 3 to 5 feet in length from nose to tail tip. Their weight ranges from 40 to 176 pounds.

The gray wolf has many special adaptations. Wolves have a sense of hearing twenty times sharper than a human's and have a sense of smell a hundred times keener. The wolf's jaws can deliver a crushing pressure of over 500 pounds per square inch! Wolves' vision is very motion sensitive. They have a reflective retina, called a tapetum that enhances their night vision. They can't see color. Wolves have great stamina. They can cover a distance of more than eighteen miles at a quick trot. They have a top speed of about 40 miles per hour.

Wolves eat animals like moose, caribou, and other deer-like animals. The predatory success of wolves is mainly due to the flexibility of their hunting methods. They will flush out their prey, stalk it, or use trickery.

The wolf is at the top of the food chain and has no natural enemies.

 
I am very disppointed in bigjay's failure to meet his deadline.He is now awarded the Lucifer HummingbirdNow, let's get this thing rolling!
This may turn out to be a nice sleeper pick. Unless there is a rule that I'm missing, this little guy could force a draw depending on the matchup. He is of course toast if the opposing team includes a predatory bird (hawk, eagle, etc). However if the only other bird in the match is of the nonflight variety, the hummingbird should have no problem staying well out of harms way for the entire match. :ph34r:
 
Mext pick, by proxy for the Rover:Gray WolfThe gray wolf is the largest wild canine. They are around 3 feet tall at the shoulder and are about 3 to 5 feet in length from nose to tail tip. Their weight ranges from 40 to 176 pounds. The gray wolf has many special adaptations. Wolves have a sense of hearing twenty times sharper than a human's and have a sense of smell a hundred times keener. The wolf's jaws can deliver a crushing pressure of over 500 pounds per square inch! Wolves' vision is very motion sensitive. They have a reflective retina, called a tapetum that enhances their night vision. They can't see color. Wolves have great stamina. They can cover a distance of more than eighteen miles at a quick trot. They have a top speed of about 40 miles per hour.Wolves eat animals like moose, caribou, and other deer-like animals. The predatory success of wolves is mainly due to the flexibility of their hunting methods. They will flush out their prey, stalk it, or use trickery. The wolf is at the top of the food chain and has no natural enemies.
This is unreal. The good folks at Mrs. Lindsay's First Grade Class have nailed two of the last four picks! Not bad at all, for the fifth round (also considering they're only six)Jeremy, in his classic terse yet informative scouting report: "Today there are only two kinds of wolves, the gray wolf and the red wolf. Wolves hunt in packs. They use their nose to find their prey. Wolves are wild and eat meat"That's right gentlemen They're wild. They eat meat. To find those fundamental death match tools at this point is maximum value.
 
Ladies (hide your children) and Brutalmen, I bring you the TERRIBLY FEROCIOUS, FEARLESS and ATTACKING, UNSCRUPULOUS KILLER...hailing from the HARSH and RUTHLESS ANTARCTIC.........the...

...............SEA LEOPARD!

a.k.a. the Leopard Seal!
In all seriousness, Mrs. Lindsay's First Grade Class had the Leopard Seal as the next pick on their board.Anthony weighs in: "Leopard seals live in and around the Antarctic. It is a powerful hunter. It eats squid, krill, other seals and penguins. It can jump out of the water onto the ice to attack its prey. The leopard seal got its name because of the colors and spots on its fur."
:eek: :thumbup:

 
We had a little more drama last night.Apparently TLEF thought that this draft was more important than his newly pregnant wife and passing his college finals. At least he did until slapped with a Himalayan Kitten penalty. Now his priorities have suddenly reversed and it all about scolarship and fatherhood. Even making his car rabid did not pacify our college boy. I have PM'ed Disco Stu, asking him to take over the team. I have not yet heard back, so I ma going to go ahead and make the TLEF pick now, and Stu or someone else will assume the remainder of the team's drafting duties.commish

 
Noodlefish takes the Andean CondorThe largest flying land bird on Earth, wingspan of up to 12 feet. All size, claws and beak. Should have no trouble managing some of the smaller, peskier opponents.More info.
Unless you score extra points for cleanin gup the carcasses off the battlefield, this bird is less then intimidating.
Its diet consists mainly of carrion, but occasionally sick or young animals. It feeds on dead deer, squirrels, and rabbits. Its favorites are mice, and other small mammals. Other things it has been seen eating are fish, lizards, and insects. It normally rips its scavengee's tendons and arteries, and snaps them with a quick flick of the beak.
 
Noodlefish takes the Andean CondorThe largest flying land bird on Earth, wingspan of up to 12 feet. All size, claws and beak. Should have no trouble managing some of the smaller, peskier opponents.More info.
Unless you score extra points for cleanin gup the carcasses off the battlefield, this bird is less then intimidating.
Well, I think it is thoughtful of him to take the Condor.... Someone needs to clean the carcasses of his other animals out of the way.... :P
 
Noodlefish takes the Andean CondorThe largest flying land bird on Earth, wingspan of up to 12 feet. All size, claws and beak. Should have no trouble managing some of the smaller, peskier opponents.More info.
Unless you score extra points for cleanin gup the carcasses off the battlefield, this bird is less then intimidating.
Not the point. Sure, it naturally chooses the easy prey, but it's more than powerful enough to, at the very LEAST.... LIFT and DROP. Goodbye, Mr. Snake. Goodbye, Mr. Fossa and Mr. Mongoose. Goodbye, Mr. Himalayan Kitten. Should be able to do a number on most other birds, also.
 
For his next selection, Team TLEF selects:

The Giant Moray Eel

This species is the largest of all the Indo-Pacific morays, growing to 2.5m in length.

The Giant Moray is normally not a concern for divers, however it should never be provoked. It is a large, powerful fish with long canine teeth that can inflict serious wounds.

 
With my next pick, I will select the poor man's hippo. That's right. The Pygmy Hippo.

I am getting a hippo 1/3 of the size of the overall 1st round draft pick but in the fifth round. This is what we call value my friends.

For the pygmy hippo's :yawn: go here.

If you would like to test your knowledge about the pygmy hippo, go here.

I'm not going to lie. I am hoping with this pick I get votes I normally won't deserve by picking a derivation of the hippo. This thing is an oversized pig, but not as mean. This is nothing more than a cheap stunt to gain votes.

 
For his next selection, Team TLEF selects:The Giant Moray EelThis species is the largest of all the Indo-Pacific morays, growing to 2.5m in length.The Giant Moray is normally not a concern for divers, however it should never be provoked. It is a large, powerful fish with long canine teeth that can inflict serious wounds.
That pick shows the Moray writhing in pain from a submission hold by a 3 inch fish. Weak.
 
With my next pick, I will select the poor man's hippo. That's right. The Pygmy Hippo. I am getting a hippo 1/3 of the size of the overall 1st round draft pick but in the fifth round. This is what we call value my friends.For the pygmy hippo's :yawn: go here.If you would like to test your knowledge about the pygmy hippo, go here.I'm not going to lie. I am hoping with this pick I get votes I normally won't deserve by picking a derivation of the hippo. This thing is an oversized pig, but not as mean. This is nothing more than a cheap stunt to gain votes.
Could probably still take off the face of a kitten or a finger monkey. Nice get.
 

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