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Dispute With My Wife. I'll Do What The FFA Rules. (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter Gary Coal Man
- Start date
Don't Noonan
Footballguy
Gary Coal Man
Footballguy
No, she's great. I love her. Total minx in the sack.
Plus, I already had a starter marriage with a hot Russian. No doubt part of the reason why my current wife has it out for my Russian neighbors.
seahawk 17
Footballguy
I know I am in the wrong when my wife calls me a c___, so you are still ok.
Officer Pete Malloy
Footballguy
ILUVBEER99
Footballguy
you're screwed. Just explain to the neighbor over a few drinks that your wife is crazy and that she's not gonna stop until the parking issue is resolved. He'll probably feel bad for you and understand the predicament you're in. Under no circumstances tell him that she's resorted to calling you a #####, he'll lose all respect for you.
![[scooter]](/data/avatars/m/22/22287.jpg?1659477690){kind=avatar}
Mrs. Rannous
Footballguy
Wait until your wife parks in the garage, then park your car behind the garage just like your neighbor does.
Your wife is an idiot.
Your wife is an idiot.
dparker713
Footballguy
Just inform her you'll be putting the house on the market the day after she files the HOA complaint. If she's that miserable, its time to move.Gary Coal Man said:
Dignan_
Footballguy
Way more interesting than the rest of this thread. What do they call that? Burying the forest in the leaves?
How bout some pics and/or kik/snapchat id for the ex hot Russian wife? You can PM me if you want to be discreet.
pollardsvision
Footballguy
You've got to talk to the neighbor here. Men understand irrational wives and the need to appease them. You should certainly be able to discuss this on good terms.
I gather that the Asianed fella in the neighborhood has noticed and discussed this parking issue too, along with your wife. As much as you don't care and I wouldn't care, there's at least 2 people in the neighborhood that do. You'd have to think there's more. Really discussing this with him might be saving him from a couple of HOA complaints. A good talk, along with the best bottle of vodka you can afford to celebrate appeasing that minx of yours, could be very fruitful for you both. You can laugh and joke at the expense of crazy wives,along with female and Asian drivers. It'll be a good time. Actually, when this discussion goes so well, and you start spending a few nights a week getting loaded with the Russian couple next door, it'll drive your wife nuts and teach her a lesson about making you deal with her issues.
I've gotten HOA complaints before. I just didn't know anybody cared, and would've gladly stopped had I known before some ******* went the HOA route.
Also, do the neighbor and his wife both transport the kids somewhat equally? Is that the issue that's preventing them from using the same solution that you and the minx use? Tough issue for him if that's the case, but it sounds like he's just going to have to work around it.
It sounds like he's going to get an HOA complaint if you don't talk to him. Maybe from your wife, but just as likely from someone else. Just tell yourself that you aren't caving to a crazy wife, you really are just being a good neighbor and helping this guy prevent further headaches.
I gather that the Asianed fella in the neighborhood has noticed and discussed this parking issue too, along with your wife. As much as you don't care and I wouldn't care, there's at least 2 people in the neighborhood that do. You'd have to think there's more. Really discussing this with him might be saving him from a couple of HOA complaints. A good talk, along with the best bottle of vodka you can afford to celebrate appeasing that minx of yours, could be very fruitful for you both. You can laugh and joke at the expense of crazy wives,along with female and Asian drivers. It'll be a good time. Actually, when this discussion goes so well, and you start spending a few nights a week getting loaded with the Russian couple next door, it'll drive your wife nuts and teach her a lesson about making you deal with her issues.
I've gotten HOA complaints before. I just didn't know anybody cared, and would've gladly stopped had I known before some ******* went the HOA route.
Also, do the neighbor and his wife both transport the kids somewhat equally? Is that the issue that's preventing them from using the same solution that you and the minx use? Tough issue for him if that's the case, but it sounds like he's just going to have to work around it.
It sounds like he's going to get an HOA complaint if you don't talk to him. Maybe from your wife, but just as likely from someone else. Just tell yourself that you aren't caving to a crazy wife, you really are just being a good neighbor and helping this guy prevent further headaches.
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T J
Footballguy
Terrible advice. Absolutely terrible. The neighbor is infringing on a common area and like it or not, is concerning to his wife. The OP needs to have her back, not the neighbor's. And it sounds like the wife called it like she saw it when she called the husband a #####. If th shoe fits. That sort of thing.
SaintsInDome2006
Footballguy
The HOA complaint has got to be stopped. That's war with your neighbor. Either convince him or shut her down but that cannot happen. You at least have to give him a heads up that she might do it. Pollard has the right approach above IMO.
Also I think I asked this before but is there a 'no parking' sign where this guy parks or is it totally within the rules for him to park where he does?
Also I think I asked this before but is there a 'no parking' sign where this guy parks or is it totally within the rules for him to park where he does?
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Chadstroma
Footballguy
My in laws had new neighbors move in a couple of years ago. When there are family gatherings- the street fills up fast with cars from everyone. One holiday about a year or two ago I went to park. There was just enough space for me to get behind one of my family members cars and not block the neighbors drive way. I was concerned about this so I even checked before turning off the car. I got out, looked and sure enough the bumper was an inch away from the line of the driveway. I go into the house.
A few hours later, we get someone knocking at the door and this stupid woman is complaining that we are blocking her driveway! Seriously?! She is lucky it was my in laws and they are overly cautious in avoiding conflict because if it was my house I would have walked her out to, showed her how it is not blocking her driveway and basically made her look as dumb as she is.
Don't be like the dumb neighbor even if your wife is the dumb neighbor.
A few hours later, we get someone knocking at the door and this stupid woman is complaining that we are blocking her driveway! Seriously?! She is lucky it was my in laws and they are overly cautious in avoiding conflict because if it was my house I would have walked her out to, showed her how it is not blocking her driveway and basically made her look as dumb as she is.
Don't be like the dumb neighbor even if your wife is the dumb neighbor.
Gary Coal Man
Footballguy
No, it's great. She's just completely irrational over this one issue. Hell, though, looking at the polling, there are numerous guys here who agree with her that I should say something to my Russian neighbor. My old Asian neighbor thinks so too, but he destroyed his lawn with too much fertilizer so I question his judgment.
shadyridr
Footballguy
It may be great but how can you justify her calling you names over and over again? Thats not rational and no way to resolve conflict in a loving marriage.
Chadstroma
Footballguy
Wait... you are a wuss if you don't talk to the neighbor so what she will do if you don't is file a HOA complaint? Uh......Gary Coal Man said:
Gary Coal Man
Footballguy
No can do with actual pics, but she was more this type of Russian beauty than this type of Russian beauty.
mr. furley
Footballguy
"look, i'm too scared to go talk to the guy but that's because i'm a woman and i shouldn't have to... but you're a man and if you don't want to talk to the guy about my problem then it's because you're a #####."Gary Coal Man said:
seems fair
Gary Coal Man
Footballguy
T J
Footballguy
Insults. Nice. Very mature.
Actually no on both, but nice try Chet.
No - married people talk to each other like that all the time and it doesn't mean squat and here you are suggesting he hit the road. That's just f'ing stupid. Big time. Dude said he has a great marriage. You're probably the one that did the bullying from the sounds of it. Used to getting your way 24/7 aren't you Chet? Keep your wife in her place Chet? I know the type.
TLEF316
Footballguy
If a man consistently called his wife a #### in a non joking way, it would be considered emotional abuse. But when a woman spends weeks calling her husband a ##### (and she's clearly not joking) to try and browbeat him into doing her dirty work, thats just how marriage works? Sorry, not buying that for a second.
The wife is irrational,(switching spots with the OP would be a very easy solution and her excuse about exposing the baby to the elements is BS) passive aggressive and a bully. OP could have handled the situation better but now she's just being a total #####.
The wife is irrational,(switching spots with the OP would be a very easy solution and her excuse about exposing the baby to the elements is BS) passive aggressive and a bully. OP could have handled the situation better but now she's just being a total #####.
Chadstroma
Footballguy
At this point, you have to talk to him.... if you don't want to be fully honest with the "Hey, my wife is freaking crazy and I am trying to contain this and not end up being the sucky neighbor" then the "I am worried my wife, who sucks at driving, is going to hit the car- can we figure out something so to avoid her causing damage?" angle is next best.
sbonomo
Footballguy
T J
Footballguy
AAABatteries
Footballguy
#####es be crazy
Gary Coal Man
Footballguy
She won't cheat. Once you ride Space Mountain and realize it's the best ride in the park you want to keep circling back.
Shutout
Footballguy
Man...women are crazy. I think my old lady (I'm calling her my old lady cause she thinks that's worse than the "C" word and it makes me laugh...and she won't ever see this post..) is great and intelligent and all that but DAMN if she isn't the most impractical, unrealistic, hypocritical (when it comes to how she expects to be treated as a customer as opposed to how she treats retail staff) person I've ever met.
So I 've had more than my fair share of issues that sound like this. In fact, this sounds EXACTLY like something she would pull. So here's my advice:
I'd start with the logical and non-emotional common sense thing.
ME: "Honey, Boris just had a 2nd kid. C'mon. You know how that is. He's just like us. He needs to park close for the same reasons YOU want to park close..keep the kids out of the elements, pack stuff in, etc."
HER: "I Don't care. He's not supposed to park there, blah blah blah, HOA...BLAH BLAH BLAH."
The stage is set at this point. Don't "reason" anything about her driving skills or lack thereof, the overwhelming obviousness that anyone except her could go around and not be bothered by it, etc. She's set. Just remove all the other emotional firewood and get down to it.
ME: "Ok. You pay for the HOA. Put them to work. Let them earn their money. YOU go plead your case and see what they say. If they back you, that's what they are for. If they don't, then this is over because your "preference" isn't worth the lost good will of the benefits of having a good neighbor...especially if the HOA says it's ok."
You just have to LOGIC them to death and remove ALL the emotion that feeds them. If they get mad (that's emotion)...Don't react to it. Don't laugh or smirk (not a god idea) but play deadpan. Just keep repeating the LOGICAL options. She'll huff and she'll puff (and she won't be "blowing" your house down for a few days) but if you're consistent and you keep pointing her in directions where every feedback is logically agreeing with you, she will never admit it to you but she will tell herself at some point that you're right. You'll gain some street cred with her.
So I 've had more than my fair share of issues that sound like this. In fact, this sounds EXACTLY like something she would pull. So here's my advice:
I'd start with the logical and non-emotional common sense thing.
ME: "Honey, Boris just had a 2nd kid. C'mon. You know how that is. He's just like us. He needs to park close for the same reasons YOU want to park close..keep the kids out of the elements, pack stuff in, etc."
HER: "I Don't care. He's not supposed to park there, blah blah blah, HOA...BLAH BLAH BLAH."
The stage is set at this point. Don't "reason" anything about her driving skills or lack thereof, the overwhelming obviousness that anyone except her could go around and not be bothered by it, etc. She's set. Just remove all the other emotional firewood and get down to it.
ME: "Ok. You pay for the HOA. Put them to work. Let them earn their money. YOU go plead your case and see what they say. If they back you, that's what they are for. If they don't, then this is over because your "preference" isn't worth the lost good will of the benefits of having a good neighbor...especially if the HOA says it's ok."
You just have to LOGIC them to death and remove ALL the emotion that feeds them. If they get mad (that's emotion)...Don't react to it. Don't laugh or smirk (not a god idea) but play deadpan. Just keep repeating the LOGICAL options. She'll huff and she'll puff (and she won't be "blowing" your house down for a few days) but if you're consistent and you keep pointing her in directions where every feedback is logically agreeing with you, she will never admit it to you but she will tell herself at some point that you're right. You'll gain some street cred with her.
ChiefD
Footballguy
Yeah, there are two things you never do as a homeowner:
1. Rat out a neighbor to the HOA
2. Be a jerk to any teenagers in your neighborhood.
Shutout
Footballguy
No, it's great. Deflection. Hell, they get money. Put them to use and if it goes her way then you're not the bad guy "Sorry Boris! Damned HOA..Whatchagonnado?"
And if it goes your way you can gripe about them alongside your old lady and it's never YOUR fault.
Shutout
Footballguy
Sounds like you and shady are scared of your HOA. I'm not willing to give anybody money for nothing. If I'm paying you, you're gonna at least enforce the rules (as ridiculous as they may be).
Johnny Bing
Footballguy
I don't think the HOA is that horrible route, people are making it sound like a letter from the HOA is going to be a felony charge. I live in a community that has a HOA, and if I was breaking any part of the covenants I'd expect a letter from HOA. I'm not going to get all worked up over it and be pissed that my neighbor didn't walk over and talk to me, especially after this guy has already spoken to the homeowner once it. Anyone that lives there, read the HOA covenants before purchasing, so they know the rules.
If I was breaking a rule, someone approached me and I went back to my ways, I'd expect to hear from the HOA.
ChiefD
Footballguy
Nope. I just take care of it myself and try not to be "that guy" who rats my neighbors out to the HOA.
Shutout
Footballguy
"All confrontation is based on deception."...Paul Watson
The appearance of "ratting out" is really nothing more than leveraging and manipulation...using the resources at your disposal.
In the above scenario, of the three outcomes, two of them result in your neighbor and/or wife being at odds with you. I prefer the option where that is not the case.
I guess not using the HOA is kind of like "not using" the fire or police department. I pay for them too and COULD take care of it myself but there seems to be reasons why we have things in place. Right tool for the job. Don't make it harder than it needs to be. Sure, go ahead and put on your wife beater and piss your neighbor off and then you;ll be dealing with his passive (or not so much so) aggressiveness AND there's a good chance your wife still won't be happy because you know your neighbor isn't going to just sprout up and say "Sure buddy. No problem..for you.". So she'll still be cranky and you'll still end up making nobody happy except now you ARE "THAT GUY" because Boris has just told everyone on the street how you directly were an ###.
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No, you become "THAT GUY" when you run your mouth to the HOA. I pay insurance, so I give money for nothing all the time.
It's insane that the smartest person in this thread is Eminence.
And I'm starting to agree with the wife. Maybe GCM is a #####, because all he really has to do is tell the neighbor the situation. He'll understand. At worst it'll go like this
GCM: Hey man, I noticed you're parking behind the garage again. My wife is giving me ####; she thinks she's going to hit you.
Neighbor: F'ing women.
GCM: I know. Would you mind parking out front though?
Neighbor: Really?! C'mon man, why doesn't she park out front?
GCM: She's worried about the kid and the elements
Neighbor: ???? uh, ok, me too
GCM: I know man, sorry, I tried to reason with her. She'll prob go to the HOA and file a complaint
Neighbor: Ha, back in mother russia something something something you! ha ha, oh well let us drink.
Also, in a marriage or partnership I don't think one person should have to fight the other persons battles for them (Ie husband fight the wife's battles)... but in situations where tempers have the potential in flaring up and there could be conflict, I think it's good for the person withOUT the emotional attachment to do the talking... so while I find the "Man's job" stuff ridiculous, I think GCM should be more than willing to talk to his neighbor on behalf of his wife.
Kanil
Footballguy
I'm married to one of those (except she's a she-Russian-Jew-Former IDF). At least your wife's not that.
sbonomo
Footballguy
What if she goes to the HOA and they start to monitor all of the houses? Next thing you know the OP has pissed off an entire block of people, save the old china man. Not a good solution.
