EAT-OFF (2 Viewers)

[General Malaise]

Manfully done.

Any chance we can get a head of lettuce as a tiebreaker?

would be genius if someone could photoshop the two of them sharing a head of lettuce hands-free

RAAAAAAAARRRRR!!!!!! x 2!!!

 

[mex]

had to break up the tie

GM [ 91 ] [49.73%]

shuke [ 92 ] [50.27%]

 

[SofaKings]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

 

[General Malaise]

Thanks for the new avatar!

 

[General Malaise]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

 

[Sammy3469]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

Valetine's candy down?

 

[Tiger Fan]

Who can fit more pieces of Super Bubble gum in their mouth at the same time?

 

[SofaKings]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

You'll come through, I have faith in you and my aliai.

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

The only possible comeback would be a shot with you crunching down simultaneously on 20 strips of bacon and one of beef jerky. It would be both an epic eating move and kind of a "Where's Waldo" thing, only with bacon and jerky instead of people and Waldo.

 

[Jaysus]

OfficeBacon would be $Ted.Danson

 

[General Malaise]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

The only possible comeback would be a shot with you crunching down simultaneously on 20 strips of bacon and one of beef jerky. It would be both an epic eating move and kind of a "Where's Waldo" thing, only with bacon and jerky instead of people and Waldo.

There in lies the real challenge. I'm kind of stuck to this desk and can only really eat what's in the office or wait for lunch. The lunch gal picks our restaurant for the day, so I'm completely at her mercy. I'd love to engest 20 pieces of bacon and some jerkey, but unless I'm doing that tonight at home, it's not happening.Also, I haven't cooked bacon in probably 35 years, so I'm not sure I'm ready to start.

 

[trogg78]

i pulled you even, shuke.

GM [ 93 ] [50.00%]

shuke [ 93 ] [50.00%]

 

[Jaysus]

Also, I haven't cooked bacon in probably 35 years, so I'm not sure I'm ready to start.

GB electricityETA: seriously, OfficeBacon - do it!

 

[General Malaise]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.

It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

The only possible comeback would be a shot with you crunching down simultaneously on 20 strips of bacon and one of beef jerky. It would be both an epic eating move and kind of a "Where's Waldo" thing, only with bacon and jerky instead of people and Waldo.

There in lies the real challenge. I'm kind of stuck to this desk and can only really eat what's in the office or wait for lunch. The lunch gal picks our restaurant for the day, so I'm completely at her mercy. I'd love to engest 20 pieces of bacon and some jerkey, but unless I'm doing that tonight at home, it's not happening.Also, I haven't cooked bacon in probably 35 years, so I'm not sure I'm ready to start.

engest, huh....god i'm dumb.

 

[Sammy3469]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

The only possible comeback would be a shot with you crunching down simultaneously on 20 strips of bacon and one of beef jerky. It would be both an epic eating move and kind of a "Where's Waldo" thing, only with bacon and jerky instead of people and Waldo.

There in lies the real challenge. I'm kind of stuck to this desk and can only really eat what's in the office or wait for lunch. The lunch gal picks our restaurant for the day, so I'm completely at her mercy. I'd love to engest 20 pieces of bacon and some jerkey, but unless I'm doing that tonight at home, it's not happening.Also, I haven't cooked bacon in probably 35 years, so I'm not sure I'm ready to start.

You can microwave bacon.

 

[General Malaise]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

The only possible comeback would be a shot with you crunching down simultaneously on 20 strips of bacon and one of beef jerky. It would be both an epic eating move and kind of a "Where's Waldo" thing, only with bacon and jerky instead of people and Waldo.

There in lies the real challenge. I'm kind of stuck to this desk and can only really eat what's in the office or wait for lunch. The lunch gal picks our restaurant for the day, so I'm completely at her mercy. I'd love to engest 20 pieces of bacon and some jerkey, but unless I'm doing that tonight at home, it's not happening.Also, I haven't cooked bacon in probably 35 years, so I'm not sure I'm ready to start.

You can microwave bacon.

That's just wrong.Also, I do not have a microwave at the new Chez Malaise. I also haven't cooked anything more than a sandwich in a month of living there.

 

[SofaKings]

Isn't there another FBG in downtown Portland that can make deliveries to GM??

 

[Sammy3469]

Back to a tie. GM is my boy. Always has been, always will.

Thanks GB...but I think the lollipop shot put shuke out front for good. I wish I had some Halloween candy to compete, but not only am I not a 7 year old, not 245 pounds and not much of a sweet eater, I just looked and Halloween was 3 months ago.

It's amazing that he saved those just for this occasion. Can't compete with that kind of clairvoyance.

The only possible comeback would be a shot with you crunching down simultaneously on 20 strips of bacon and one of beef jerky. It would be both an epic eating move and kind of a "Where's Waldo" thing, only with bacon and jerky instead of people and Waldo.

There in lies the real challenge. I'm kind of stuck to this desk and can only really eat what's in the office or wait for lunch. The lunch gal picks our restaurant for the day, so I'm completely at her mercy. I'd love to engest 20 pieces of bacon and some jerkey, but unless I'm doing that tonight at home, it's not happening.Also, I haven't cooked bacon in probably 35 years, so I'm not sure I'm ready to start.

You can microwave bacon.

That's just wrong.Also, I do not have a microwave at the new Chez Malaise.

I also haven't cooked anything more than a sandwich in a month of living there.

Perhaps, but you are a man of the people.

There are fancy microwave bacon cookers on the market which work well, but they are not necessary. Place a microwave-safe paper towel in a micro dish large enough to fit a single layer of bacon slices (4 to 6 slices). Cover with another paper towel. Six slices should take about 4 to 5 minutes on high, depending on the wattage of your microwave and the thickness of the bacon. Start checking after the first two minutes, and continue cooking at one minute intervals until you can judge the cooking time for the way you like it. Consult your microwave manual for more specific times. A rotating base in the microwave is highly recommended for even cooking, and most come with one built in these days. Remember that foods continue to cook even after the timer goes off in a microwave, so let it rest a few minutes before you dive in to let it crisp up and avoid burns. Curly bacon never bothers me, but this method reduces curling of the bacon.

So be careful GB.

 

[mr. furley]

You can microwave bacon.

shameful

 

[popeye]

You can microwave bacon.

shameful

ETA: Shuke's lunch

 

[Ditkaless Wonders]

I think we need a throw down by these two at a Rodizio Grill. Picture it, guachos with meat on sticks, GM, Shuke, maybe we fly in Evilgrin to cover the event with his color commentary. We could try to prevail on Big Bottom for some theme music.

Let's face it, we have been heading straight towards this moment for years. It is inevitiable. Why fight it.

 

[mr. furley]

I think we need a throw down by these two at a Rodizio Grill. Picture it, guachos with meat on sticks, GM, Shuke, maybe we fly in Evilgrin to cover the event with his color commentary. We could try to prevail on Big Bottom for some theme music.Let's face it, we have been heading straight towards this moment for years. It is inevitiable. Why fight it.

how much for tickets?i'll need 20.

 

[Early_10]

GM, for a guy who clearly loves food you don't look very happy eating it.

 

[popeye]

I think we need a throw down by these two at a Rodizio Grill. Picture it, guachos with meat on sticks, GM, Shuke, maybe we fly in Evilgrin to cover the event with his color commentary. We could try to prevail on Big Bottom for some theme music.Let's face it, we have been heading straight towards this moment for years. It is inevitiable. Why fight it.

how much for tickets?i'll need 20.

The demand will likely force this to PPV. In house seats may be beyond even the standard FFA income.

 

[Early_10]

And I just put Shuke ahead. Its food. Its Shuke. You don't separate these things.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

I would like to direct the attention of our two fine athletes to this.

I can think of no finer a way to establish the EAT OFF! champion than with chicken fried bacon.

 

[Verbal Kint]

And I just put Shuke ahead. Its food. Its Shuke. You don't separate these things.

 

[mr. furley]

I think we need a throw down by these two at a Rodizio Grill. Picture it, guachos with meat on sticks, GM, Shuke, maybe we fly in Evilgrin to cover the event with his color commentary. We could try to prevail on Big Bottom for some theme music.Let's face it, we have been heading straight towards this moment for years. It is inevitiable. Why fight it.

how much for tickets?i'll need 20.

The demand will likely force this to PPV. In house seats may be beyond even the standard FFA income.

can we expect a pirated broadcast at Fro's?

 

[Stoneys]

Ok, ok, It looks like a toss up, but I would like our two fine contestants to possibly come face to face here for a challenge at this fine establishment Denny's Beer Barrel Pub in Clearfield, PA

Can you eat this burger?

 

[Nathan R. Jessep]

Ok, ok, It looks like a toss up, but I would like our two fine contestants to possibly come face to face here for a challenge at this fine establishment Denny's Beer Barrel Pub in Clearfield, PA

Can you eat this burger?

unhinging the lower jaw is nothing for these pros

 

[popeye]

I think we need a throw down by these two at a Rodizio Grill. Picture it, guachos with meat on sticks, GM, Shuke, maybe we fly in Evilgrin to cover the event with his color commentary. We could try to prevail on Big Bottom for some theme music.Let's face it, we have been heading straight towards this moment for years. It is inevitiable. Why fight it.

how much for tickets?i'll need 20.

The demand will likely force this to PPV. In house seats may be beyond even the standard FFA income.

can we expect a pirated broadcast at Fro's?

Oh #### yes.

 

[SoFresh&SoClean]

SHUKE TAKES THE LEAD

 

[General Malaise]

GM, for a guy who clearly loves food you don't look very happy eating it.

You calling me fat, Early?I really don't eat very much. I usually eat one meal a day, two tops. Most of my weight I put on in the dreadful summer of Aught Six (and subsequently took off, how you doin) was due to beer consumption.220 was the peak, errrrrr low point. Rocking 187 now with 180 the goal. Then Ill start tanning, grow my hair out, pierce my tongue and move to Nova Scotia. I'd get in the ready position were I you.

 

[General Malaise]

I ordered a boring old ham sandwich with a house salad today.

Demoralized, I'm waiving the white flag.

 

[redman]

Ok, ok, It looks like a toss up, but I would like our two fine contestants to possibly come face to face here for a challenge at this fine establishment Denny's Beer Barrel Pub in Clearfield, PA

Can you eat this burger?

You mean eat the burger with fries, right?

 

[Chaka]

200 Votes and we have a tie ballgame.

GM [ 95 ] [50.00%]

shuke [ 95 ] [50.00%]

Total Votes: 200

I DEMAND EXTRA INNINGS!!!

 

[General Malaise]

I ordered a boring old ham sandwich with a house salad today.

Demoralized, I'm waiving the white flag.

OR AM I????????????

 

[redman]

I ordered a boring old ham sandwich with a house salad today.

Demoralized, I'm waiving the white flag.

OR AM I????????????

The computer screen images slay me. :X

 

[EYLive]

HAHAHAHAHA!!!

 

[mr. furley]

I'm waiving the white flag.

OH NO!

 

[General Malaise]

I ordered a boring old ham sandwich with a house salad today.

Demoralized, I'm waiving the white flag.

OR AM I????????????

The computer screen images slay me.

I stuffed more in for the second shot. That's a genuine look of fright right there. I ate angry for Furley in the first one, but I couldn't even feign anger in the second shot. I'm a little frightened not only at my gaping maw, but the fact that I'm actually doing this on a daily basis.As my boss has asked me countless times...."Do you like your job?"

 

[Chaka]

I ordered a boring old ham sandwich with a house salad today.

Demoralized, I'm waiving the white flag.

OR AM I????????????

Shai-HuludShai-Hulud

Shai-Hulud

Shai-Hulud

Shai-Hulud

 

[General Malaise]

The options appear belowGM [ 95 ] [50.00%] shuke [ 95 ] [50.00%]
WHAT MORE DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME>?!?!/11ONE?!!!?

 

[mex]

 

[Jaysus]

The options appear belowGM [ 95 ]   [50.00%] shuke [ 95 ]   [50.00%]

WHAT MORE DO YOU PEOPLE WANT FROM ME>?!?!/11ONE?!!!?

OfficeBacon

 

[Limp Ditka]

 

[Nathan R. Jessep]

I ordered a boring old ham sandwich with a house salad today.

Demoralized, I'm waiving the white flag.

OR AM I????????????

MFn PREDATOR!

 

[Fullback Fro]

I ordered a boring old ham sandwich with a house salad today.

Demoralized, I'm waiving the white flag.

OR AM I????????????

Mother of Pearl

 

[Mrs. BSR]

I ordered a boring old ham sandwich with a house salad today.

Demoralized, I'm waiving the white flag.

OR AM I????????????

The computer screen images slay me.

I stuffed more in for the second shot. That's a genuine look of fright right there. I ate angry for Furley in the first one, but I couldn't even feign anger in the second shot. I'm a little frightened not only at my gaping maw, but the fact that I'm actually doing this on a daily basis.As my boss has asked me countless times...."Do you like your job?"

Actually you look pretty angry in the second one too.

 

[phrozen]