Going out to dinner with the cab driver tomorrow. I can't wait to see what her brand of crazy is all about.
Did we ever go out with the playboy chick?
Scheduled for Thursday, but she's turning out to be really clingy.
May have to pull the plug on her before it ever happens.
I think I may just go with the international team for now.
The hell you will. Look here, fella...I'm sitting here with 5 kids and a wife who is scared to have sex with me because I'm still potent.
I have been ordered by my urologist to ejaculate a total of 100 times since I was clipped in September. I've watched so much pron on my computer and phone that I can't even enjoy it anymore. I have no imagination, I can't afford a hooker, I look like a pregnant Jim Gaffigan, so really, you're all I got for storyboard romance and sexual hijinx. I mean....there's Homer I guess, but he's not got getting any vulva with that goiter on his head and the ambition of a Peruvian tree sloth.
Now you get out there and you text that Playboy model right now. I don't care if she's clingier than Alicia Silverstone in the movie Crush, you put up with it until you post your sordid details here or I will drive up to Gig Harbor, find your house key that you taped to the front door, saunter in and casually drop off my twins as punishment for your wussy display here. I always knew lawyers were selfish, but good god, man....have you no compassion in your fellow man?