GM, making you a one-time offer to just leave these ****-clowns and become an A's fan.
1) Same colors as the Ducks, and half of Oregon alums are from CA anyway. Color/team symbiosis.
2) A's manager isn't responsible for thousands of cartel-related deaths in Mexico b/c of his drug habit.
3) A's center-fielder isn't responsible for THOUSANDS of cartel-related deaths in Mexico b/c of his drug habit.
4) Did I mention the colors? You know...GREEN?
My link
5) Are almost definitely going to win the World Series.
6) Very similar scenario to Major League, where owner wants to move the team but scrappy upstarts defy all odds. There's even a guy on the team who was in the CA Penal League.
7) Noted Twitter hottie and A's-wife Amanda McCarthy has promised a "trombone" to every Athletics fan if they make the WS.
Offer expires at midnight. Stu and BentRlrRRLey, you guys too.