GM's thread about nothing (24 Viewers)

[bentley]

We hired a strip club waitress to do the same thing a few years ago for our draft. I think she also charged $200. The champagne room 'interview' the night before the draft cost more.

 

[BobbyLayne]

My boy weighs about 70 pounds and drives the ball about 175 yards.

He shot a 90 today.

I figure I got about two more years before he's kicking my butt out there.

 

[McJose]

Just booked a beerwench/draft board girl for our draft.

Please rate her.

Wow. We've always talked about this, but never gone through with it.

same here. posted one craiglist ad, and the responses were kind of lame. changed the wording a bit a couple days later and got a ton of responses from the type of girls we're looking for (not hookers or strippers--just fun chicks willing to wear a thong, dance around, fill drinks, etc).

how much are you paying her?

$200 for 3 hour draft.

For $200 she better give me drafting advice too.

really? $200 for 3 hours, with 10 guys at the draft. Just under $7/hour per person. I'd expect to be paying a lot more than that just tipping a random waitress at a bar.

Good point. Plus I don't need drafting advice...ever. :hawkscreech:

 

[McJose]

Tonight I'm doing a vow renewal ceremony for a couple that has been married for 45 years.

Looking to work in some shtick. Do you think "you, poor, dumb, old, SOB" works?

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Tonight I'm doing a vow renewal ceremony for a couple that has been married for 45 years.Looking to work in some shtick. Do you think "you, poor, dumb, old, SOB" works?

Nix "old." And the inexplicable comma between "you" and "poor."

 

[gamera]

Tonight I'm doing a vow renewal ceremony for a couple that has been married for 45 years.Looking to work in some shtick. Do you think "you, poor, dumb, old, SOB" works?

Something about people not learning from history being doomed to repeat it works as well.

 

[Tiger Fan]

GM - did you masturbate in the middle of the night when you made the chicken drumsticks or the chicken thighs? I'm making drumsticks using your recipe and want to make sure I do it right.

 

[mr. furley]

Anyhow, I'll grow out the beard for a week, then shave it all, save for the moustache, which I have to tote around for 10 days, thanks to the Blazers pooping the bed in game 3 last week. My co-worker made the bet with me and because he's afraid the 'stache' won't show up on my pale face, purchased for me the "Just For Men" moustache darkener....for black guys. I'm going to have Lando Calrisians's Moustache on Casper the Ghost's face.Neat.

did we ever get pics of this, btw?

 

[McJose]

Tonight I'm doing a vow renewal ceremony for a couple that has been married for 45 years.Looking to work in some shtick. Do you think "you, poor, dumb, old, SOB" works?

Nix "old." And the inexplicable comma between "you" and "poor."

It's going to be spoken. Pretty sure the comma error is not going to play into it.

 

[JerseyToughGuys]

Just booked a beerwench/draft board girl for our draft.

Please rate her.

awesome

 

[JerseyToughGuys]

Just booked a beerwench/draft board girl for our draft.

Please rate her.

Wow. We've always talked about this, but never gone through with it.

same here. posted one craiglist ad, and the responses were kind of lame. changed the wording a bit a couple days later and got a ton of responses from the type of girls we're looking for (not hookers or strippers--just fun chicks willing to wear a thong, dance around, fill drinks, etc).

Sure.

we wouldn't bother to run an ad if we needed a stripper in vegas.

this girl is in vegas?

 

[Mr.Pack]

By the way, if your wife ever asks you to go to body pump class at the Y say no. It's a trap so that you won't be able to move your arms, legs, shoulders, back, neck, knees, or stomach the next day. Especially unfortunate when you have your softball championship the next day.And yes, body pump at the Y does indeed lend itself to some double entendres. Go nuts.

Sounds like the first time I did P90X. I did the arms portion and could not move them a bit 2 days later. Undeterred, I did the leg workout and maybe one of the other DVD's in between, which caused me to literally not be able to walk for one full day. I got cocky during the first upper body one, and I was jogging regularly before starting, so I thought I wouldn't ahve the same, eventual problem with the lower body one. I've never gotten a wake-up call like that."Wake-up call" was probably a poor choice of words considering I'm in even worse shape these days.

Hippling still engaged:I got you beat jeep; I went to the driving range to swing my clubs for the first time in 3 years. I think I have a hernia now. Could barely walk the day after and still am in some pretty good pain. Only hit a small bucket of balls too.

 

[Chaos Commish]

My boy weighs about 70 pounds and drives the ball about 175 yards.He shot a 90 today.I figure I got about two more years before he's kicking my butt out there.

Nice. I took my 12 year old daughter, 5-4 and 117, to the tennis courts this morning to see what she learned at camp. She's been bragging. Holy cow, she aced me for the first time in her life and did it two more times to prove it wasn't a fluke. We've hit around since she was 8 and play a fun set where I would give her the doubles lanes and always win but be nice and keep it close for her fun all while trying to teach and improve her. I can still beat her giving up the doubles lines, but it isn't easy. It made me take a nap. She's pretty clearly the best basketball player in her class too. My mom said, well you do know athletic ability skips a generation. Also my nephew's wife brought a new baby into the world yesterday. Her name's Kayla. She's perfect. I'm not a grandpa, but I guess I am a great uncle. In the great things kids say category, the nephew's 4 year old son pulled me aside to tell me something awesome."My new baby eats my mommy's boobs... whoa!"

 

[urbanhack]

anyone catch this gem?

But what do I know, I only have an MBA/JD, and am an expert in corporate finance, consulting medium and large companies...no big deal. I'm sure the average idiot American knows more.

 

[-fish-]

anyone catch this gem?

But what do I know, I only have an MBA/JD, and am an expert in corporate finance, consulting medium and large companies...no big deal. I'm sure the average idiot American knows more.

Wow. I'm pretty sure he's a college drop out, since he always refers to his "major" (supposedly molecular biology) and never his "degree". There's no freaking way that guy has a JD.

 

[FatMax]

anyone catch this gem?

But what do I know, I only have an MBA/JD, and am an expert in corporate finance, consulting medium and large companies...no big deal. I'm sure the average idiot American knows more.

Wow. I'm pretty sure he's a college drop out, since he always refers to his "major" (supposedly molecular biology) and never his "degree". There's no freaking way that guy has a JD.

He's much closer to selling used cars than he is to practicing law. No doubt about it.

 

[heckmanm]

Also my nephew's wife brought a new baby into the world yesterday. Her name's Kayla. She's perfect. I'm not a grandpa, but I guess I am a great uncle. In the great things kids say category, the nephew's 4 year old son pulled me aside to tell me something awesome."My new baby eats my mommy's boobs... whoa!"

 

[Tiger Fan]

I'm a big sucker for these Hall of Fame speeches

 

[Tecumseh]

OH THE HUMANTITTY!!!!

 

[Good Posting Judge]

anyone catch this gem?

But what do I know, I only have an MBA/JD, and am an expert in corporate finance, consulting medium and large companies...no big deal. I'm sure the average idiot American knows more.

Wow. I'm pretty sure he's a college drop out, since he always refers to his "major" (supposedly molecular biology) and never his "degree". There's no freaking way that guy has a JD.

Not listed here. My link

 

[BobbyLayne]

OH THE HUMANTITTY!!!!

Wonder if those birds have been domesticated. I would love to get one. Then when my friends come over, I could say "Hey guys...come look at the Great Tit I got in a cage".

 

[BobbyLayne]

anyone catch this gem?

But what do I know, I only have an MBA/JD, and am an expert in corporate finance, consulting medium and large companies...no big deal. I'm sure the average idiot American knows more.

Wow. I'm pretty sure he's a college drop out, since he always refers to his "major" (supposedly molecular biology) and never his "degree". There's no freaking way that guy has a JD.

Not listed here. My link

He's stated he went to first year law. You know, the year that weeds out the weak ones? Well, that's the year he decided he couldn't be a lawyer for...ummm...ethical reasons. Or something like that. Went against his integrity. Yep, that was it.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Just booked a beerwench/draft board girl for our draft.

Please rate her.

Wow. We've always talked about this, but never gone through with it.

same here. posted one craiglist ad, and the responses were kind of lame. changed the wording a bit a couple days later and got a ton of responses from the type of girls we're looking for (not hookers or strippers--just fun chicks willing to wear a thong, dance around, fill drinks, etc).

how much are you paying her?

$200 for 3 hour draft.

For $200 she better give me drafting advice too.

I'm going to need ad verbiage. I've tried this without much response as well (only for baseball). Maybe I shouldn't include pics of my junk?

 

[Mr.Pack]

I'm FB friends with "The Rock"

Slap it high?

 

[Frostillicus]

GM - did you masturbate in the middle of the night when you made the chicken drumsticks or the chicken thighs? I'm making drumsticks using your recipe and want to make sure I do it right.

The chicken was really good. Would have appreciated some advice on the non-recipe part of the equation. Now I don't know if I'm supposed to get up at 4am or not.

 

[BobbyLayne]

Not listed here.

My link

I didn't click this before.

45 month gap between AA & DT - a year to bounce out of law school, a year in mom's basement, and his MBA? But that doesn't make sense, he would have listed it on his education.



How do you ever get another gig after you drop out for almost 4 years? Something fish there...

 

[Tiger Fan]

Ate a fried cheeseburger tonight

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Ate a fried cheeseburger tonight

Have any pics that look less like diarrhea?

 

[Tecumseh]

Not listed here.

My link

I didn't click this before.

45 month gap between AA & DT - a year to bounce out of law school, a year in mom's basement, and his MBA? But that doesn't make sense, he would have listed it on his education.



How do you ever get another gig after you drop out for almost 4 years? Something fish there...

Apparently he was working at home.http://twitter.com/#!/LHUCKS1

 

[Tiger Fan]

Ate a fried cheeseburger tonight

Have any pics that look less like diarrhea?

Sorry, didn't have my professional camera

 

[Frostillicus]

Not listed here.

My link

I didn't click this before.

45 month gap between AA & DT - a year to bounce out of law school, a year in mom's basement, and his MBA? But that doesn't make sense, he would have listed it on his education.



How do you ever get another gig after you drop out for almost 4 years? Something fish there...

Apparently he was working at home.http://twitter.com/#!/LHUCKS1

Awesome

 

[urbanhack]

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

 

[Mr.Pack]

SLB - Congrats on the 16 yrs.

Early - Congrats/Sorry on the D

Chaos Commish - Congrats to CC Jr, on the tennis

ShamStrykSam - Congrats on the Wedding

YSR - Wow, my condolences to you. Very sorry.

Bogart - Sorry about the marriage

 

[bentley]

An awful combination of Lone Star tallboys, whiskey & ginger ale and some kind of butterscotch shots at the neighborhood happy hour last night left me in serious pain this morning and ready to swear off booze. Yet, here I am with a Sierra Nevada in hand.

 

[Mr.Pack]

Catfish: I don't know the meaning of your odd donation amount, but you are ridiculously generous. HUGE thanks. Y'all: I'm rappelling down a 225-foot building and raising money for Special Olympics. If interested in helping secure my likely painful death, please donate via my FB page.

Sorry I missed this krista.Great job!

 

[Oh Yes!]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow.

heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow. heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

Two from the intergoogle:

Lindsey from Oklahoma City, OK writes; "Paint thinner or mineral spirits will get any grease stain out of carpet, etc., even if it's been washed. Saved my car carpet from being completely ruined!" Thanks a bunch Lindsey! Michelle Ellis from Lithia Springs, Georgia writes; "One year my husband got a wild hair up his butt to clean motorcycle carburetors in the living room on the carpet (smart one huh?) and got grease spots everywhere! A friend of mine showed me how to get it out by dipping a tooth brush in Pine-Sol and scrubing... it dissolved it!" Thanks for sharing Michelle!

 

[urbanhack]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow. heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

Dawn

 

[bentley]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow. heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

Dawn

Don?

 

[bostonfred]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow. heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

Dawn

Or Don. Same thing.

 

[bostonfred]

Damn you bentley.

 

[Frostillicus]

SLB - Congrats on the 16 yrs.Early - Congrats/Sorry on the DChaos Commish - Congrats to CC Jr, on the tennisShamStrykSam - Congrats on the WeddingYSR - Wow, my condolences to you. Very sorry.Bogart - Sorry about the marriage

<_<

 

[Frostillicus]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow. heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

move

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Rae Dawn?

 

[Oh Yes!]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow. heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

move

take a hike

 

[urbanhack]

elbow grease?

 

[Frostillicus]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow. heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

move

take a hike

You should quit this message board.

 

[Oh Yes!]

was using a hammer drill to destroy a s-load of tile in my home today. real manly stuff. sweating and everything. only problem is i got grease all over the stairs (carpet) somehow. heard some Goop followed with some dishsoap should do the trick. any other ideas?

move

take a hike

You should quit this message board.

you trying to out-drunk me?

 

[BobbyLayne]

bostonfred hitting tape measure shots today...

You copied a paragraph that had nothing to do with his post but had the word Keynesian in it, and spelled propensity wrong. I keep waiting for the miners to reach the end of your bottomless pit of dumb, but you don't disappoint.

Another priceless FFA moment