Tribulation
Footballguy
The $5 sandwich thread is proving to be quite amusing.
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GM's thread about nothing (67 Viewers)
- Thread starter General Malaise
- Start date
fatguyinalittlecoat
Footballguy
Just dropped to Page 2. Still around.
Idiot Boxer
Footballguy
The Occupy Wall Street thread is so delicious. The wackjobs from both sides of the political FFA spectrum are rolling in there. BigSteelThrill vs. Fensalk is classic.
Bogart
Footballguy
These are not making me feel any better.:doingmorepushupsandeatinglessasItype:'Tribulation said:'Bucky86 said:Chris Farley?'Bogart said:
He'd make a great W C Fields though. Maybe next Halloween.
Dungeon Master
Footballguy
yes'Gadzooks said:'Dungeon Master said:I love Alf. And I love Kev's hair.
Oh no. I hope she's not so upset that she decides to leave you and become a single-mom on the prowl for a single-dad who likes bendy straws and Arby's. That would be awful. :crossesfingers:And does her friend really spell her name "Carin"?'Dungeon Master said:
Early_10
footballgoddess
The second part is very impressive. It says a lot about your character and the people you surround yourself with...mostly.'krista4 said:Mr. krista just sent me the following text from work: "This week can go #### itself. I know it's early still, but I'm ready to write off this week as an #######." Should be fun when he gets home from work!AND I just noticed that Mr. krista and former Mr. krista are now Facebook friends. Yay.
General Malaise
Footballguy
Ran 5K last night in 27 minutes.'mr. furley said:'General Malaise said:I'm not a huge fan of Cool Ranch Doritos or Doritos in general, but two weeks ago, an enormous box of Cool Ranch Doritos appeared in our office with like 50 little bags in there. I've probably had 25 of them since then.
i love this'General Malaise said:
Today I feel like somebody beat me with a sack of oranges.
wadegarrett
FFA Legend™
Just heard a Wal-Mart ad that included "the Holidays." #### off Wal-Mart.
Early_10
footballgoddess
I read :eatinglessass: and was confused.These are not making me feel any better.:doingmorepushupsandeatinglessasItype:'Tribulation said:'Bucky86 said:Chris Farley?'Bogart said:
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
General Malaise
Footballguy
Wait, wut? That thing works?'Tiger Fan said:
Early_10
footballgoddess
My new house rocks. Not because it's some fabulous mansion, it's an ordinary bungalow half the size of my last place but it's MINE, all mine and there are boxes everywhere that no one is nagging me to unpack. I'm afraid to buy lottery tickets, I might win. I feel *that* lucky.
krista4
Footballguy
This is very sweet...mostly.The second part is very impressive. It says a lot about your character and the people you surround yourself with...mostly.'krista4 said:Mr. krista just sent me the following text from work: "This week can go #### itself. I know it's early still, but I'm ready to write off this week as an #######." Should be fun when he gets home from work!AND I just noticed that Mr. krista and former Mr. krista are now Facebook friends. Yay.
This is very awesome...completely.
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Krista - Thanks for the mustache donation. We'll send you some clippings as a gift. 
Bogart
Footballguy
Have had short hair for years. Decided this summer to grow it out. Not trying for comb over, but not sure where it's going from moment to moment.'Dr. Awesome said:You should definitely stay clean shaven after the month is over. Lookin' a tad sexy.'Bogart said:
And cut the comb over off. Short is sexy. Donald Trump has money, not style.
Gadzooks
Footballguy
Just returned from lunch. Followed my normal routine, pick up Little 'Zooks at school, bring him to my Mom's and have lunch. While at my Mom's house, I decided to use the bathroom and that's when things got interesting.
I go to the bathroom and notice that water is dripping from the sink. So I try turn the handle to shut it off and it won't stop, the water starts coming out stronger. So I turn the handle the other way and now the water is coming out at full strength. Now I'm trying to turn it both ways and nothing is working. I keep trying and now the handle is just spinning, like a door knob that is off the hinge or groove (I don't know if that's the right analogy, I'm worse than Otis when it comes to home repair) I keep trying because the water is not stopping, and then the whole handle comes off and the water comes shooting out of the hole where the handle was. It was like a fire hydrant being flushed. It shot right up into my face, right between the eyes. I tried blocking the hole with my hands trying to figure how I'd be able to shut the valve off from underneath with flooding the entire bathroom. So while blocking the hole (with water still spraying everywhere) I start yelling for my Mother to come help. Naturally she's going deaf and can't hear me. I'm now screaming "MA" at the top of my lungs (think Will Ferrell in Wedding Crashers) Finally she comes in and after giving me a detailed explanation of why she can't bend down to shut off the valve under sink due to her bad knees, she attempts to block the hole while I try to find the valve to shut off. Within 2 seconds I hear her yell "oh ####" as now the water is spraying directly into her face as she tries to cover her face with her hands (she apparently has given up on trying to block the hole)
Finally I get the valve shut off. It was difficult to find the valve because my parents like to keep roughly 76 bath towels and 5 cases of toilet paper under the bathroom sink. Now that it is shut off, my mother is drenched. My head is soaked and my dress shirt and tie are completely soaked, and since it was a white shirt, my nipples and chest hair showing right thru the soaked shirt. My mother, God bless her, looks at me asks in all sincerity: "why would you do that?"
Little 'Zooks has been laughing hysterically throughout this entire ordeal. To the point that he couldn't form sentences. I basically understood that he was saying something about "being on america's funny videos show". Once he finally calmed down, he looked up at me and then burst into laughter again while pointing at my chest. He then said "I can see your chest dots through your shirt". I was aggravated at the whole thing so I snapped back at him and said "They are not chest dots, they are called nipples!" He then laughed more and said "oh ok, then I can see your nickels". I thought that was too funny to correct, so for now he fully believes that nipples are called nickels. Then I drove to my house and changed my clothes and came back to work.
The best part is that as I'm driving to my house, my cell phone rings and it's my mom. I answered it saying "Now what?" And she says "oh nothing, I forgot to ask you what was the good news that someone wrote about on your facebook thing? Did you win something?"
I go to the bathroom and notice that water is dripping from the sink. So I try turn the handle to shut it off and it won't stop, the water starts coming out stronger. So I turn the handle the other way and now the water is coming out at full strength. Now I'm trying to turn it both ways and nothing is working. I keep trying and now the handle is just spinning, like a door knob that is off the hinge or groove (I don't know if that's the right analogy, I'm worse than Otis when it comes to home repair) I keep trying because the water is not stopping, and then the whole handle comes off and the water comes shooting out of the hole where the handle was. It was like a fire hydrant being flushed. It shot right up into my face, right between the eyes. I tried blocking the hole with my hands trying to figure how I'd be able to shut the valve off from underneath with flooding the entire bathroom. So while blocking the hole (with water still spraying everywhere) I start yelling for my Mother to come help. Naturally she's going deaf and can't hear me. I'm now screaming "MA" at the top of my lungs (think Will Ferrell in Wedding Crashers) Finally she comes in and after giving me a detailed explanation of why she can't bend down to shut off the valve under sink due to her bad knees, she attempts to block the hole while I try to find the valve to shut off. Within 2 seconds I hear her yell "oh ####" as now the water is spraying directly into her face as she tries to cover her face with her hands (she apparently has given up on trying to block the hole)
Finally I get the valve shut off. It was difficult to find the valve because my parents like to keep roughly 76 bath towels and 5 cases of toilet paper under the bathroom sink. Now that it is shut off, my mother is drenched. My head is soaked and my dress shirt and tie are completely soaked, and since it was a white shirt, my nipples and chest hair showing right thru the soaked shirt. My mother, God bless her, looks at me asks in all sincerity: "why would you do that?"
Little 'Zooks has been laughing hysterically throughout this entire ordeal. To the point that he couldn't form sentences. I basically understood that he was saying something about "being on america's funny videos show". Once he finally calmed down, he looked up at me and then burst into laughter again while pointing at my chest. He then said "I can see your chest dots through your shirt". I was aggravated at the whole thing so I snapped back at him and said "They are not chest dots, they are called nipples!" He then laughed more and said "oh ok, then I can see your nickels". I thought that was too funny to correct, so for now he fully believes that nipples are called nickels. Then I drove to my house and changed my clothes and came back to work.
The best part is that as I'm driving to my house, my cell phone rings and it's my mom. I answered it saying "Now what?" And she says "oh nothing, I forgot to ask you what was the good news that someone wrote about on your facebook thing? Did you win something?"
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Sarnoff
Footballguy
My mother, God bless her, looks at me asks in all sincerity: "why would you do that?"
And she says "oh nothing, I forgot to ask you what was the good news that someone wrote about on your facebook thing? Did you win something?"
Captain Quinoa
Footballguy
General Malaise
Footballguy
Captain Quinoa
Footballguy
oh and 
Zow
Footballguy
That's not a bad time at all.Ran 5K last night in 27 minutes.'mr. furley said:'General Malaise said:I'm not a huge fan of Cool Ranch Doritos or Doritos in general, but two weeks ago, an enormous box of Cool Ranch Doritos appeared in our office with like 50 little bags in there. I've probably had 25 of them since then.i love this'General Malaise said:
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
'Bob Sacamano said:
'Tribulation said:'Gadzooks said:
Yeah, this will end will. Timing, man.
From now on, your GMTAN name is Tang.Ran 5K last night in 27 minutes.
Just returned from lunch. Followed my normal routine, pick up Little 'Zooks at school, bring him to my Mom's and have lunch. While at my Mom's house, I decided to use the bathroom and that's when things got interesting.
I go to the bathroom and notice that water is dripping from the sink. So I try turn the handle to shut it off and it won't stop, the water starts coming out stronger. So I turn the handle the other way and now the water is coming out at full strength. Now I'm trying to turn it both ways and nothing is working. I keep trying and now the handle is just spinning, like a door knob that is off the hinge or groove (I don't know if that's the right analogy, I'm worse than Otis when it comes to home repair) I keep trying because the water is not stopping, and then the whole handle comes off and the water comes shooting out of the hole where the handle was. It was like a fire hydrant being flushed. It shot right up into my face, right between the eyes. I tried blocking the hole with my hands trying to figure how I'd be able to shut the valve off from underneath with flooding the entire bathroom. So while blocking the hole (with water still spraying everywhere) I start yelling for my Mother to come help. Naturally she's going deaf and can't hear me. I'm now screaming "MA" at the top of my lungs (think Will Ferrell in Wedding Crashers) Finally she comes in and after giving me a detailed explanation of why she can't bend down to shut off the valve under sink due to her bad knees, she attempts to block the hole while I try to find the valve to shut off. Within 2 seconds I hear her yell "oh ####" as now the water is spraying directly into her face as she tries to cover her face with her hands (she apparently has given up on trying to block the hole)
Finally I get the valve shut off. It was difficult to find the valve because my parents like to keep roughly 76 bath towels and 5 cases of toilet paper under the bathroom sink. Now that it is shut off, my mother is drenched. My head is soaked and my dress shirt and tie are completely soaked, and since it was a white shirt, my nipples and chest hair showing right thru the soaked shirt. My mother, God bless her, looks at me asks in all sincerity: "why would you do that?"
Little 'Zooks has been laughing hysterically throughout this entire ordeal. To the point that he couldn't form sentences. I basically understood that he was saying something about "being on america's funny videos show". Once he finally calmed down, he looked up at me and then burst into laughter again while pointing at my chest. He then said "I can see your chest dots through your shirt". I was aggravated at the whole thing so I snapped back at him and said "They are not chest dots, they are called nipples!" He then laughed more and said "oh ok, then I can see your nickels". I thought that was too funny to correct, so for now he fully believes that nipples are called nickels. Then I drove to my house and changed my clothes and came back to work.
The best part is that as I'm driving to my house, my cell phone rings and it's my mom. I answered it saying "Now what?" And she says "oh nothing, I forgot to ask you what was the good news that someone wrote about on your facebook thing? Did you win something?"
Idiot Boxer
Footballguy
Sorry to hear this Bogart. You've had a rough year. Thoprawishes.
Zow
Footballguy
Just stated watching it two days ago and am already into the second season. It's freaking awesome.Turns out, this Breaking Bad show is the goods.
YSR
Footballguy
So I've been trying to apply for some jobs here in Knoxville to earn a little extra money, but more importantly, to get benefits for our family. Currently we are paying ~$600/month out-of-pocket for both of our medical and dental benefits. We have both agreed that I don't need to get any kind of major career track-type position, as we will hopefully start a family in the next year, so I've been searching for customer service/admin type positions.
What I have found is that I fall smack dab in the middle of being overqualified and underqualified for a whole lot of positions out there. Also, this whole online application thing is really throwing me. I've actually gone to offices to give them my resume and hopefully meet the hiring manager just for a second or two, but have been turned away and told to apply online.
I'm at the point now where I applied to Lowe's and Starbucks today, because they both provide benefits to part-time employess. I, of course, had to fill out online applications for both, including a 30+ minute assessment for each company.
I graduated cum laude with a degree in Latin from a pretty darn good university, and I'm sitting at my computer, feeling defeated because I don't know whether I should tell my supervisor that a spill needs cleaning, ask a coworker to help with the spill, tell the customer I was on my way to help to hold on a minute while I clean the spill or ignore the spill.
(that question was actually not one of the harder ones - point is, these assessments are terrible and I feel like I'm already screening myself out of a job that I know I could do better than most who work there).
/rant
What I have found is that I fall smack dab in the middle of being overqualified and underqualified for a whole lot of positions out there. Also, this whole online application thing is really throwing me. I've actually gone to offices to give them my resume and hopefully meet the hiring manager just for a second or two, but have been turned away and told to apply online.
I'm at the point now where I applied to Lowe's and Starbucks today, because they both provide benefits to part-time employess. I, of course, had to fill out online applications for both, including a 30+ minute assessment for each company.
I graduated cum laude with a degree in Latin from a pretty darn good university, and I'm sitting at my computer, feeling defeated because I don't know whether I should tell my supervisor that a spill needs cleaning, ask a coworker to help with the spill, tell the customer I was on my way to help to hold on a minute while I clean the spill or ignore the spill.
(that question was actually not one of the harder ones - point is, these assessments are terrible and I feel like I'm already screening myself out of a job that I know I could do better than most who work there).
/rant
wadegarrett
FFA Legend™
Good stuff Gadzooks.
Idiot Boxer
Footballguy
#OccupyKnoxville
YSR
Footballguy
Ack, this will teach me to post about trivial things before reading through the thread. Really sorry you and your stepdad have a tough road ahead. Not to be a downer, but if the diagnosis is 100%, take advantage of the time. Some people don't get time to say goodbye.
General Malaise
Footballguy
Sorry to hear it, GB. :(
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
K4, had lunch at Fritanga today. It's in a questionable neighborhood but the restaurant was very quaint. Our server, (Fred?), was extremely nice and helpful. He recommended the Enchiladas Nicas for my client and the Chanco Con Yuca for me. We both loved our selections and vowed to try a plantain dish on our next visit. The best part is we didn't get jacked.
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
Aw #### man. :( T&P's GB.
St. Louis Bob
Footballguy
Lie. A lot. Add "head fry cook at Arthur Treacher's" or "first female accepted into Skull & Bones" where necessary. GLB
Gadzooks
Footballguy
Sorry Bogart. Thoughts and prayers are being sent your way. That just sucks.
Drifter
Footballguy
Sorry Bogart. Not much else to say.
YSR - On those tests do not compromises safety or morality on any question. With the exception of those two items, your answers should focus on the customer and being proactive.
In your coffee question, the answer was to clean the spill immediately (safety hazard and being proactive) while letting the customer know what you were doing (focus on the customer)
YSR - On those tests do not compromises safety or morality on any question. With the exception of those two items, your answers should focus on the customer and being proactive.
In your coffee question, the answer was to clean the spill immediately (safety hazard and being proactive) while letting the customer know what you were doing (focus on the customer)
Last edited by a moderator:
Bogart
Footballguy
Thanks, and no worries. I was posting about comb overs when I got the call. It's the trival things in this thread that are keeping me sane as sit here and try to stay tough as my mom falls apart. Funny thing, as soon as I got here, she had me stay with him so she could go have a smoke. Really?
Buck Bradcanon
Footballguy
Good luck Bogart. Sorry to hear.
Last edited by a moderator:
Dungeon Master
Footballguy
This
Thorn
Footballguy
Just returned from lunch. Followed my normal routine, pick up Little 'Zooks at school, bring him to my Mom's and have lunch. While at my Mom's house, I decided to use the bathroom and that's when things got interesting.I go to the bathroom and notice that water is dripping from the sink. So I try turn the handle to shut it off and it won't stop, the water starts coming out stronger. So I turn the handle the other way and now the water is coming out at full strength. Now I'm trying to turn it both ways and nothing is working. I keep trying and now the handle is just spinning, like a door knob that is off the hinge or groove (I don't know if that's the right analogy, I'm worse than Otis when it comes to home repair) I keep trying because the water is not stopping, and then the whole handle comes off and the water comes shooting out of the hole where the handle was. It was like a fire hydrant being flushed. It shot right up into my face, right between the eyes. I tried blocking the hole with my hands trying to figure how I'd be able to shut the valve off from underneath with flooding the entire bathroom. So while blocking the hole (with water still spraying everywhere) I start yelling for my Mother to come help. Naturally she's going deaf and can't hear me. I'm now screaming "MA" at the top of my lungs (think Will Ferrell in Wedding Crashers) Finally she comes in and after giving me a detailed explanation of why she can't bend down to shut off the valve under sink due to her bad knees, she attempts to block the hole while I try to find the valve to shut off. Within 2 seconds I hear her yell "oh ####" as now the water is spraying directly into her face as she tries to cover her face with her hands (she apparently has given up on trying to block the hole) Finally I get the valve shut off. It was difficult to find the valve because my parents like to keep roughly 76 bath towels and 5 cases of toilet paper under the bathroom sink. Now that it is shut off, my mother is drenched. My head is soaked and my dress shirt and tie are completely soaked, and since it was a white shirt, my nipples and chest hair showing right thru the soaked shirt. My mother, God bless her, looks at me asks in all sincerity: "why would you do that?"
Bob Sacamano
Footballguy
Thoprawishes Bogart. Cancer sucks balls.
Notorious T.R.E.
Showdown!™ Administrator
Sorry to hear Bogart. Let me know if you have any questions. My GF's father is in the same boat, only he has had it for 2.5 before just recently going into hospice.
Tremendous Upside
Footballguy
God, cancer ####### sucks
#### cancer
#### cancer
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