GM's thread about nothing (71 Viewers)

[kevzilla]

I "sat" in a Mini at the auto show once. Not pretty. Although it fared better than the Audi TT.

You should have seen me in the Lotus Elise. Although 'in' is open to some interpretation.

 

[Homer J Simpson]

So I overnighted my speeding fine plus the failure to appear fine in to the court. They say it should take a couple of days for that to get through the system and for my warrant to clear. Are the cops going to come to another county to arrest me at work or can I pretty safely give it a couple of days to clear and then give the sheriff's warrants office a call and let them know I'm paid up? BIL had been driving on a suspended license for a while before he got arrested. Babe, did they come after you right away?

The warrants office sent me a post card with a number to call, but I kind of feel like it's the old ploy where they tell a bunch of guys with warrants that they've won Raiders season tickets and then arrest them when they show up to claim their prize.

Who the #### would show up for Raiders tickets?

 

[Homer J Simpson]

Nice to see FDAS figuring out how to use the "like" feature. <_<

 

[UniAlias]

Nice to see FDAS figuring out how to use the "like" feature. <_<

He's just been pissed because he can't "like" his own posts.

 

[General Malaise]

Somehow, some way, the Aladdin Motor Inn has managed to be worse than I expected.

Is the window air conditioner working? No mold in the corners of the cement ceilings? No chips in the $1.98 a sheet "1968" wood paneling?

Lets not get on our high horse princess.

There is no window air conditioner. To be fair, there is also no heat. You get the temp you get. When we walked into the room, Mr. krista opened the window due to the overpowering mildew smell. No screen on the window. It's open for now, but there are a LOT of birds around here.

I don't know if there is mold in the corners, but there sure are a lot of cobwebs. I prefer the cobwebs to the globs of unidentified substances found all over the walls and the long black hairs on the bed. The "accent" wall is orange, which is not a terribly soothing sleep color. At least it matches...wait, wait, it doesn't...the pink formica counters on the sink. Well, that's in the bathroom, right? No, the sink is not in the bathroom so much as nearer to the middle of the room itself. The bathroom has a toilet and a tub/shower and blue ink scratchings on the walls.

But those are just aesthetics. Whatever. I'll just settle in and get on the internet and try not to touch anything. Except the guy didn't tell us the internet password, and there are wireless networks called "Aladdin" and "Aladdin guest" both of which require passwords (turns out, of course, that the appropriate network is neither of these and is instead called "NetGear11"). No problem, I'll just call down. Oops, the room phone doesn't work. No problem, will use my cell. Oops, every time I call the number it says the call won't go through and to try again later. Fine, I'll watch a little TV and get the password on the way out to dinner. Where's the remote? Oh, there isn't one.

All right, I'll go down and ask for the password. Sore after our hike and the flights of stairs will suck, but at least we're on the top floor so it will be quiet here. Other than the people in the next room who slam their door going in and out, causing the whole room to shake. On the plus side, they only seem to go in or out of the room every two ####### minutes.

The beds have six inches of metal sticking out on either side, right in the middle. Mr. krista has somehow managed to hit his leg into that metal at least a dozen times already. At least I have that to keep me entertained.

OK, off to dinner!

 

[DA RAIDERS]

So I overnighted my speeding fine plus the failure to appear fine in to the court. They say it should take a couple of days for that to get through the system and for my warrant to clear. Are the cops going to come to another county to arrest me at work or can I pretty safely give it a couple of days to clear and then give the sheriff's warrants office a call and let them know I'm paid up? BIL had been driving on a suspended license for a while before he got arrested. Babe, did they come after you right away?

The warrants office sent me a post card with a number to call, but I kind of feel like it's the old ploy where they tell a bunch of guys with warrants that they've won Raiders season tickets and then arrest them when they show up to claim their prize.

So I overnighted my speeding fine plus the failure to appear fine in to the court. They say it should take a couple of days for that to get through the system and for my warrant to clear. Are the cops going to come to another county to arrest me at work or can I pretty safely give it a couple of days to clear and then give the sheriff's warrants office a call and let them know I'm paid up? BIL had been driving on a suspended license for a while before he got arrested. Babe, did they come after you right away?

The warrants office sent me a post card with a number to call, but I kind of feel like it's the old ploy where they tell a bunch of guys with warrants that they've won Raiders season tickets and then arrest them when they show up to claim their prize.

Who the #### would show up for Raiders tickets?

#### off. BOTH a yous

 

[Henry Ford]

So I overnighted my speeding fine plus the failure to appear fine in to the court. They say it should take a couple of days for that to get through the system and for my warrant to clear. Are the cops going to come to another county to arrest me at work or can I pretty safely give it a couple of days to clear and then give the sheriff's warrants office a call and let them know I'm paid up? BIL had been driving on a suspended license for a while before he got arrested. Babe, did they come after you right away?

The warrants office sent me a post card with a number to call, but I kind of feel like it's the old ploy where they tell a bunch of guys with warrants that they've won Raiders season tickets and then arrest them when they show up to claim their prize.

Who the #### would show up for Raiders tickets?

Criminals. I thought that was obvious.

 

[-fish-]

So I overnighted my speeding fine plus the failure to appear fine in to the court. They say it should take a couple of days for that to get through the system and for my warrant to clear. Are the cops going to come to another county to arrest me at work or can I pretty safely give it a couple of days to clear and then give the sheriff's warrants office a call and let them know I'm paid up? BIL had been driving on a suspended license for a while before he got arrested. Babe, did they come after you right away?

The warrants office sent me a post card with a number to call, but I kind of feel like it's the old ploy where they tell a bunch of guys with warrants that they've won Raiders season tickets and then arrest them when they show up to claim their prize.

Who the #### would show up for Raiders tickets?

Criminals. I thought that was obvious.

Oh, bull####. I have no interest in raiders tickets.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Somehow, some way, the Aladdin Motor Inn has managed to be worse than I expected.

Is the window air conditioner working? No mold in the corners of the cement ceilings? No chips in the $1.98 a sheet "1968" wood paneling?

Lets not get on our high horse princess.

There is no window air conditioner. To be fair, there is also no heat. You get the temp you get. When we walked into the room, Mr. krista opened the window due to the overpowering mildew smell. No screen on the window. It's open for now, but there are a LOT of birds around here.

I don't know if there is mold in the corners, but there sure are a lot of cobwebs. I prefer the cobwebs to the globs of unidentified substances found all over the walls and the long black hairs on the bed. The "accent" wall is orange, which is not a terribly soothing sleep color. At least it matches...wait, wait, it doesn't...the pink formica counters on the sink. Well, that's in the bathroom, right? No, the sink is not in the bathroom so much as nearer to the middle of the room itself. The bathroom has a toilet and a tub/shower and blue ink scratchings on the walls.

But those are just aesthetics. Whatever. I'll just settle in and get on the internet and try not to touch anything. Except the guy didn't tell us the internet password, and there are wireless networks called "Aladdin" and "Aladdin guest" both of which require passwords (turns out, of course, that the appropriate network is neither of these and is instead called "NetGear11"). No problem, I'll just call down. Oops, the room phone doesn't work. No problem, will use my cell. Oops, every time I call the number it says the call won't go through and to try again later. Fine, I'll watch a little TV and get the password on the way out to dinner. Where's the remote? Oh, there isn't one.

All right, I'll go down and ask for the password. Sore after our hike and the flights of stairs will suck, but at least we're on the top floor so it will be quiet here. Other than the people in the next room who slam their door going in and out, causing the whole room to shake. On the plus side, they only seem to go in or out of the room every two ####### minutes.

The beds have six inches of metal sticking out on either side, right in the middle. Mr. krista has somehow managed to hit his leg into that metal at least a dozen times already. At least I have that to keep me entertained.

OK, off to dinner!

I'm going to go ahead and give you guys permission to skeet on the floor.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

So I overnighted my speeding fine plus the failure to appear fine in to the court. They say it should take a couple of days for that to get through the system and for my warrant to clear. Are the cops going to come to another county to arrest me at work or can I pretty safely give it a couple of days to clear and then give the sheriff's warrants office a call and let them know I'm paid up? BIL had been driving on a suspended license for a while before he got arrested. Babe, did they come after you right away?

The warrants office sent me a post card with a number to call, but I kind of feel like it's the old ploy where they tell a bunch of guys with warrants that they've won Raiders season tickets and then arrest them when they show up to claim their prize.

Who the #### would show up for Raiders tickets?

Criminals. I thought that was obvious.

Oh, bull####. I have no interest in raiders tickets.

 

[Henry Ford]

So I overnighted my speeding fine plus the failure to appear fine in to the court. They say it should take a couple of days for that to get through the system and for my warrant to clear. Are the cops going to come to another county to arrest me at work or can I pretty safely give it a couple of days to clear and then give the sheriff's warrants office a call and let them know I'm paid up? BIL had been driving on a suspended license for a while before he got arrested. Babe, did they come after you right away?

The warrants office sent me a post card with a number to call, but I kind of feel like it's the old ploy where they tell a bunch of guys with warrants that they've won Raiders season tickets and then arrest them when they show up to claim their prize.

Who the #### would show up for Raiders tickets?

Criminals. I thought that was obvious.

Oh, bull####. I have no interest in raiders tickets.

I think this post is an admission of guilt.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

I "sat" in a Mini at the auto show once. Not pretty. Although it fared better than the Audi TT.

You should have seen me in the Lotus Elise. Although 'in' is open to some interpretation.

TRE likes this.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Were there really 10 seasons of Desperate Housewives? Jesus.

 

[Frostillicus]

Were there really 10 seasons of Desperate Housewives? Jesus.

Grey's Anatomy is going for number 11 this fall.

 

[St. Louis Bob]

Saw this group last night. The lead singer had this really short plaid skirt on. I felt like I was back in HS again. So ####### hot. During a break, she came over to the table to talk. Actually true.

So you talked to a lead singer of cover band?

Damn, I wish I was Bob

Not the point and you're ### ####ed right.

ETA

There was at least 100 people at the place and when they got done with the set, first thing she did was head to our table.

I almost got raped by this fairly attractive 50ish cougar while in line for the bathroom at the wedding.

Hottest bald guy at the rock club, locally amazing but not elite.

I wouldn't go that far.

She seemed more interested in Mrs. SLB really.

 

[-fish-]

So I overnighted my speeding fine plus the failure to appear fine in to the court. They say it should take a couple of days for that to get through the system and for my warrant to clear. Are the cops going to come to another county to arrest me at work or can I pretty safely give it a couple of days to clear and then give the sheriff's warrants office a call and let them know I'm paid up? BIL had been driving on a suspended license for a while before he got arrested. Babe, did they come after you right away?

The warrants office sent me a post card with a number to call, but I kind of feel like it's the old ploy where they tell a bunch of guys with warrants that they've won Raiders season tickets and then arrest them when they show up to claim their prize.

Who the #### would show up for Raiders tickets?

Criminals. I thought that was obvious.

Oh, bull####. I have no interest in raiders tickets.

I think this post is an admission of guilt.

I allegedly have no interest in raiders tickets.

 

[General Malaise]

Pro Tip: If you insist on making crockpot chicken in the shower, avoid at all costs compression briefs followed by a trip to the driving range and copious beers after that. For some, the crockpot stock may not be completely used up and anything that might leak out post-shower could adhere itself like super glue to some of the hairs around the genital region. Urgent urination caused by copious beers might lead the big head to the urinal to unleash the hounds in a hurry before realizing that the little head is stuck sideways in a patch of hairs. In that scenario, pee will find itself everywhere except the base of the urinal.

 

[Dan Lambskin]

Were there really 10 seasons of Desperate Housewives? Jesus.

Grey's Anatomy is going for number 11 this fall.

What a horrible ####### show that is

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Pro Tip: If you insist on making crockpot chicken in the shower, avoid at all costs compression briefs followed by a trip to the driving range and copious beers after that. For some, the crockpot stock may not be completely used up and anything that might leak out post-shower could adhere itself like super glue to some of the hairs around the genital region. Urgent urination caused by copious beers might lead the big head to the urinal to unleash the hounds in a hurry before realizing that the little head is stuck sideways in a patch of hairs. In that scenario, pee will find itself everywhere except the base of the urinal.

File this one under "worst visual ever" please.

 

[Drifter]

Were there really 10 seasons of Desperate Housewives? Jesus.

Grey's Anatomy is going for number 11 this fall.

What a horrible ####### show that is

I remember watching the first season and commenting that the show seemed to just be about, "We're all good looking doctors and we're in love!". I assume it never changed off that theme.

 

[Henry Ford]

Pro Tip: If you insist on making crockpot chicken in the shower, avoid at all costs compression briefs followed by a trip to the driving range and copious beers after that. For some, the crockpot stock may not be completely used up and anything that might leak out post-shower could adhere itself like super glue to some of the hairs around the genital region. Urgent urination caused by copious beers might lead the big head to the urinal to unleash the hounds in a hurry before realizing that the little head is stuck sideways in a patch of hairs. In that scenario, pee will find itself everywhere except the base of the urinal.

I don't think I make crockpot chicken the same way you do.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

 

[Aerial Assault]

Were there really 10 seasons of Desperate Housewives? Jesus.

Grey's Anatomy is going for number 11 this fall.

One of the worst shows in television history. Actually true.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I want to name my band Toxic Hellstew.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

I really need to get a band.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

And maybe learn to play an instrument or something.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

And maybe learn to play an instrument or something.

The dulcet tones of Bobby Sac is all the instrument we need.

 

[Ignoramus]

Pro Tip: If you insist on making crockpot chicken in the shower, avoid at all costs compression briefs followed by a trip to the driving range and copious beers after that. For some, the crockpot stock may not be completely used up and anything that might leak out post-shower could adhere itself like super glue to some of the hairs around the genital region. Urgent urination caused by copious beers might lead the big head to the urinal to unleash the hounds in a hurry before realizing that the little head is stuck sideways in a patch of hairs. In that scenario, pee will find itself everywhere except the base of the urinal.

File this one under "worst visual ever" please.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Were there really 10 seasons of Desperate Housewives? Jesus.

Grey's Anatomy is going for number 11 this fall.

One of the worst shows in television history. Actually true.

Yeah, but it has that dude from Men-in-Cleats' avatar and that chick from Ally McBeal.

 

[Guster]

Pro Tip: If you insist on making crockpot chicken in the shower,

Spoiler

avoid at all costs compression briefs followed by a trip to the driving range and copious beers after that. For some, the crockpot stock may not be completely used up and anything that might leak out post-shower could adhere itself like super glue to some of the hairs around the genital region. Urgent urination caused by copious beers might lead the big head to the urinal to unleash the hounds in a hurry before realizing that the little head is stuck sideways in a patch of hairs. In that scenario, pee will find itself everywhere except the base of the urinal.

File this one under "worst visual ever" please.No kidding... that #### needs to be in spoiler tags

 

[Henry Ford]

Can someone clue me in as to why this would be called "crockpot chicken"?

Also, don't do that in the shower. It'll end up costing you thousands.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

And maybe learn to play an instrument or something.

The dulcet tones of Bobby Sac is all the instrument we need.

This would be 100 times worse than the visual of GM's shvantz getting spooge-glued to his albino pubes.

 

[1234]

Well then. I certainly read that. So...yeah.

 

[-fish-]

Can someone clue me in as to why this would be called "crockpot chicken"?

Also, don't do that in the shower. It'll end up costing you thousands.

link

 

[Henry Ford]

Can someone clue me in as to why this would be called "crockpot chicken"?

Also, don't do that in the shower. It'll end up costing you thousands.

link

Of course. Crying to strangers and cooking chicken until 4 am always makes me a little randy, too.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

There was a joke on Parks and Rec this year where Chris Traeger told Ann that watching Grey's Anatomy with her was "literally a never-ending roller coaster of emotion." I was guffawing for a good minute or two at that one.

 

[Henry Ford]

How many years do you imagine it would take practicing admiralty and maritime law before using the word "seaman" in a sentence would stop being funny?

 

[Ignoramus]

How many years do you imagine it would take practicing admiralty and maritime law before using the word "seaman" in a sentence would stop being funny?

Infinity years.

 

[Ignoramus]

I'm looking to buy a couple of city/commuter bicycles if anyone has them for sale. I have an ipod Shuffle and three 16" wheel covers from a 2006 Rav4 (these will probably fit other models/years but I don't know).

Oh yeah, sorry to hear about your ordeal, Roverfish.

I bought my wife this for xmas.

still new, unused

I got myself this

it is also new and unused at this point

You looking to deal?

Yes, but I don't have a three wheeled RAV4

I want a motorcycle.

I do not have a motorcycle but I do have cash.

 

[Bob Sacamano]

Back in the restaurant days in HS, we had a waiting list to be seated, and I had to get my manager to call "Seaman, party of 6" because I couldn't do it without chuckling.

He did, too.

 

[Henry Ford]

"My boss knows more about seamen than almost any other lawyer in the United States."

 

[General Malaise]

Were there really 10 seasons of Desperate Housewives? Jesus.

Grey's Anatomy is going for number 11 this fall.

So, I think I told you all about my buddy who is in a rock band with Andy Summers, formerly of a little band known as The Police. In fact, I know I did and most of you teased me. Anyhow, my buddy has sought out financial advice from me (he was looking for hedge funds, but isn't quite there yet) but in our conversations, he let me know how much his wife makes if they re-sign her for Grey's Anatomy. I figured it would be quite a bit, but damn....$37K per episode. That's like Ted Danson money.

 

[General Malaise]

Pro Tip: If you insist on making crockpot chicken in the shower,

Spoiler

avoid at all costs compression briefs followed by a trip to the driving range and copious beers after that. For some, the crockpot stock may not be completely used up and anything that might leak out post-shower could adhere itself like super glue to some of the hairs around the genital region. Urgent urination caused by copious beers might lead the big head to the urinal to unleash the hounds in a hurry before realizing that the little head is stuck sideways in a patch of hairs. In that scenario, pee will find itself everywhere except the base of the urinal.

Spoiler

File this one under "worst visual ever" please.No kidding... that #### needs to be in spoiler tags

Oh, okay...let's go back to sharting our pants and warts on our balls.

 

[General Malaise]

Can someone clue me in as to why this would be called "crockpot chicken"?

Also, don't do that in the shower. It'll end up costing you thousands.

really?

 

[Henry Ford]

Pro Tip: If you insist on making crockpot chicken in the shower,

Spoiler

avoid at all costs compression briefs followed by a trip to the driving range and copious beers after that. For some, the crockpot stock may not be completely used up and anything that might leak out post-shower could adhere itself like super glue to some of the hairs around the genital region. Urgent urination caused by copious beers might lead the big head to the urinal to unleash the hounds in a hurry before realizing that the little head is stuck sideways in a patch of hairs. In that scenario, pee will find itself everywhere except the base of the urinal.

Spoiler

File this one under "worst visual ever" please.No kidding... that #### needs to be in spoiler tags

Spoiler

Oh, okay...let's go back to sharting our pants and warts on our balls.

Some of us never left.

 

[General Malaise]

And maybe learn to play an instrument or something.

The dulcet tones of Bobby Sac is all the instrument we need.

This would be 100 times worse than the visual of GM's shvantz getting spooge-glued to his albino pubes.

Hey m#######, they're red.

 

[Henry Ford]

Can someone clue me in as to why this would be called "crockpot chicken"?

Also, don't do that in the shower. It'll end up costing you thousands.

really?

Yes, really. You'll end up with a giant, concrete-like hardened clog in your pipes. Not a euphemism.

Think how crunchy the sock gets.

 

[Notorious T.R.E.]

Can someone clue me in as to why this would be called "crockpot chicken"?

Also, don't do that in the shower. It'll end up costing you thousands.

really?

Yes, really. You'll end up with a giant, concrete-like hardened clog in your pipes. Not a euphemism.

Think how crunchy the sock gets.

Go on. /wetdream

 

[Bob Sacamano]

The member Notorious T.R.E. can not receive any new messages

 

[General Malaise]

Femmes are the ####. Missed them in NOLA in high school and still pissed about that. Did see a bad ### tribute show one halloween night where these local musicians killed a few Femmes songs

I saw them at Tipatinos (sp?) in 1991. Drove down from Jackson in a mini-van full of older college kids. Was an awesome show. Wonder if that's the same show you missed...