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Greatest Video Game Draft 2011 (1 Viewer)
- Thread starter madshot31
- Start date
pollardsvision
Footballguy
Boxing games aren't "Fighting games" per the Fighter judge (though he did pick UFC Undisputed for the category on his personal undrafted team and I'm not sure how an MMA game would be but not boxing)jwb said:
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Sea Ropes
Footballguy
To be fair, I did rank it between Tekken 3 and Virtua Fighter, so I didn't penalize it at all. It's just my opinion that it was more sportsy than fighty. UFC has the word "Fighting" in it so...
I got nothing. 
jwb
Footballguy
None of those. I had mentioned earlier that I went from arcades to PC in terms of gaming, and kind of missed the whole NES/SNES era when it came out. I did go back and visit some of the RPG's and such on those systems, but not platformers.I've played games with platforming elements (Uncharted, Assassin's Creed/etc), but pure platformers? Nope. Not my thing at all, I guess.Yeah, I don't believe that. Surely he's played some platformers. Perhaps he doesn't realize they're platformers, but I bet he's played some. Castlevania series? Mega Man series? Ninja Gaiden? the original Prince of Persia? Gosh, there's an endless list of platformers from the NES and SNES era alone.Whaaaaaaat???jwb said:
SlaX
Footballguy
Commander Keen?None of those. I had mentioned earlier that I went from arcades to PC in terms of gaming, and kind of missed the whole NES/SNES era when it came out. I did go back and visit some of the RPG's and such on those systems, but not platformers.I've played games with platforming elements (Uncharted, Assassin's Creed/etc), but pure platformers? Nope. Not my thing at all, I guess.Yeah, I don't believe that. Surely he's played some platformers. Perhaps he doesn't realize they're platformers, but I bet he's played some. Castlevania series? Mega Man series? Ninja Gaiden? the original Prince of Persia? Gosh, there's an endless list of platformers from the NES and SNES era alone.Whaaaaaaat???jwb said:
Steve Tasker
Footballguy
Does Andy D. have C.A.T.S. as his main character?
SlaX
Footballguy
Yes. From Zero Wing.
Steve Tasker
Footballguy
Main character and not villain? Just want to make sure...the draft tracker and draft rosters have conflicting reports.
Andy Dufresne
Footballguy
I put CATS as main character so I could put The Reapers as a villain.
rikishiboy
Footballguy
Mostly to help me keep track...we are waiting on the following rankings
4th generation
7th generation
FPS
Sports
Strategy
Racing
Action
Platformer
Hack-N- Bash
Horror
Multi-player
Story
Main Characters
Villains
Worst
Flex
4th generation
7th generation
FPS
Sports
Strategy
Racing
Action
Platformer
Hack-N- Bash
Horror
Multi-player
Story
Main Characters
Villains
Worst
Flex
AcerFC
Footballguy
You spelled Hooters final judging results wrong
jwb
Footballguy
I got two of my three done this week (Arcade and RPG), but story will likely have to wait until this weekend / early next week.
hooter311
Footballguy
Biggest problem I am running into is the multiplayer. We have two distinct kinds. The kind where you and 3 of your buddies pull all nighters playing together like Halo 3 and Rock Band and the kind where groups of nerds develop 2nd lives online like Everquest, WoW, and Starcraft.I'm using an outside panel for the some of the PC FPS judging because I just haven't many games on PC, ever.
SlaX
Footballguy
I have a feeling my top 3 just dropped to bottom 3.
hooter311
Footballguy
I'm not going to be a Richard and drop something just because I haven't played it or didn't like it. Going to try to give as fair as rankings as possible and use my personal experiences with each to provide commentary.When I saw Starcraft in this category I wanted to bash my moniter in. I was hoping I would get more games like Fusion Frenzy and less games like WoW, but I'm going to try to find a way to not take it out on the drafters.My college roommate was a PC gaming nut so I've watched him play most if not all of everything drafted there.
Andy Dufresne
Footballguy
Speaking of Fusion Frenzy...The one for the Xbox was actually really fun with several good games.The one for the 2nd, for the 360, was an abomination and could have been chosen for Worst Game. My kids and I still ask each other "Was that a lot of damage player 2?" when we're playing other games.
SlaX
Footballguy
We needed a party category. While those are fine multiplayer games, it's just not what most people think of when they think of multiplayer these days. I think I highlighted earlier in the thread that there are about 3 or 4 different genres of multiplayer. Online muliplayer, offline multiplayer, co-op multiplayer, party multiplayer... and I'm sure you can break down even more genres.
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hooter311
Footballguy
Glad I never played the 2nd one then.First one was a favorite of mine, but it kind of sucked that you really only had to be skilled at the last "Fusion Frenzy" mini game to win when you played the actual game. Much more fun to just play the mini games individually.Twisted System was my favorite.
SlaX
Footballguy
The 2nd was terrible. Be glad you missed it.
pollardsvision
Footballguy
Still need Racing and Hack and Slash, I think.
BlueDredSo
Footballguy
Damn, I knew moving Goldeneye from Multiplayer to FPS might've been a mistake...but, having the same judge for both categories it should even out, or at least I hope
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Sea Ropes
Footballguy
I'll take Hack and Slash/Beat 'em Up. If racing isn't judged after I'm done with this one, I'll do racing too this weekend.
sports_fan
Footballguy
Anyone remember Oddworld: Abe's Oddysee?
It was pretty difficult (I don't think I ever managed to finish it) but I had a lot of fun trying. I think it would have been a fine pick as a puzzle game.
It was pretty difficult (I don't think I ever managed to finish it) but I had a lot of fun trying. I think it would have been a fine pick as a puzzle game.
pollardsvision
Footballguy
Thanks. You've been doing a great job with these (my #####ing about the Tyson snub aside).
Insein
Footballguy
Worst Game Rankings
Note: With all my rankings, I look at the final list of games without regard to who has picked them for impartiality.
I have been a fan of ripping apart awful games since I first read EGM with Seanbaby’s “Rest of the Crap” on the last page. The truly awful drek he suffered through so we wouldn’t have to, is astounding. The hilarity continued with the Angry Video Gamer Nerd and his scathing reviews of all the old excrement that we tend to forget or ignore from the old systems. Worst Game Ever is a category I knew I had to judge because it can’t just be a bad game. We’ve all played those over the years. It has to fail on so many levels that the game can be considered worst of all time.
Again, I have chosen 5 categories to judge these failures on.
Unplayability: The reverse of gameplay. How impossible is it to play from just a technical standpoint?
Level of Fail: How far did the developers miss the mark of what they were aiming to do and what impact did it have as whole because of it.
Concept: How bad an idea was it to make this game? “What were they thinking?!”
Society Offense: How offensive was this game to society? (Rated on a 1-5 scale)
Gamer Offense: How offensive was this to a gamers’ intelligence?
All categories are based on a scale of 1-10 (10 being outstanding and 1 being god awful) except for the "Society Offense." That is based on a 1-5 scale. Five is full-on, in your face offensive. One is not very offensive. I chose to lower the amount of this category down otherwise some truly awful games may get left behind for a merely offensive game.
So with those criteria, here are the results.
13 Super Columbine Massacre RPG – PC (18.11)
Score: 3-2-8-5-6=24
When I first saw this title in the draft, I couldn’t imagine a more offensive topic to make a video game from. However, the circumstances surrounding the game make it less offensive and more thought provoking. The stated purpose of the game by the creator is not to make money or to gain notoriety. It was to create awareness of what was going through the minds of the killers for those that were not aware. Not the best approach in doing so as he made the game to look as a classic SNES or NES sprite driven RPG but it was effective in its delivery. Many people were offended just because of the name without ever playing the game. The game itself plays well and the narrative is a grim reminder of what was going on with these individuals. I think the creator achieved what he set out to do.
Man, what a heavy way to start this rankings list. Bad games should be mocked and laughed at for their awfulness not make you feel terrible about being a human being. Well they can do that too but usually after much laughter and derision.
12 The King of King: The Early Years – NES (25.04)
Score: 8-3-6-3-9=29
Ah a much more lighthearted bible journey about assault camels trying to reach the baby Jesus and other exploits from his early life. What a brutal game to watch in video. I can only imagine the level of bleh it was to actually play. The fact this was pirate software created by a Christian company to run unlicensed on the NES only makes it that much more awful. It was a really bad game but when all you’re setting out to do is create a few pirate games about the bible, well…mission accomplished.
11 Catfight: The Ultimate Female Fighting Game – PC (22.03)
Score: 7-4-6-3-9=29
Imagine Mortal Kombat with just poorly rendered female fighters, no differentiation in fighting maneuvers and the worst music and voice acting of any kind of imaginable awfulness. You get this mess. You would think it was created by a porn studio. Oh wait, it was. Vivid Entertainment was the parent company for the creator. This was a complete piece of crap but again, what were you expecting from a title like “Catfight: The Ultimate female fighting Game?”
10 Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing – PC (22.04)
Score: 10-4-5-1-10=30
What was truly amazing is that they packaged and sold this game for any price. We’ve all seen beta versions of games. Hell some of us have even seen alpha versions (basically just a testing screen for the barebones game). Those are made to build a game to its polished finish. This “game” doesn’t even qualify as an alpha version and yet they sold it. They sold it and said that it was “tested thoroughly” before they did. LIARS! Who could possibly have tested this and said “that’s ready to be played right there. Ship it.” There is no racing as your opponent never leaves the starting line. There is no control since you go from 0-60 instantly and stop on dime by taking your finger off the button. There isn’t any collision detection since objects can be passed through like nothing. Even the bridges are mere backdrops for this rigs rampage. You can drive vertically on mountains, fly through the sky and crash your game by clicking begin. The game was incomplete but it was also made by a no name company for a discount price of $5. Again, what were we expecting?
9 Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust – Xbox360 (23.02)
Score: 7-6-5-4-8=30
Now this game had loftier expectations. Larry had an established history of tongue in cheek humor combined with witty, sexual innuendo. Even the reboot of the series in Magna Cum Laude was a decent pick up and play game that was merely mediocre but provided a few enjoyable moments. This game though took all that built up prestige (as much prestige as can be established from a game about a homely bald guy getting laid) and performed euthanasia on it. The jokes are not just offensive, they aren’t even funny. They make you feel bad for having seen it. Its stuff we wouldn’t watch or joke about even if we were into the hardest of the hardcore fetish porn and were just around other people who were into that. They might get offended by it as well. The minigames are crap. The actual females were several notches down from the last game as they looked more like a plastic surgeon’s nightmare than anything remotely sexy (by animated video game standards even). This game is a mess. Truthfully though, it’s not like it was advertised by anyone as being available (thankfully) and any money they made should have been paid out to families of the designers since they more than likely don’t have jobs anymore to support them. You know the titles above it are truly bad if this is only 9th.
8 Charlie’s Angels – GameCube (23.13)
Score: 7-8-4-3-8=30
Games based on movies are terrible in general but this game makes it an art form. They take bad gameplay and pointless objectives that have nothing to do with the movie and make it about as fun as getting kicked in the balls by Lucy Liu (if your into that, try to imagine it as a bad thing). No difference between the girls moves despite them saying so. Fighting through hoards and hoards of generic enemies to find that you were only doing it to press a button is more than idiotic. It’s downright insulting. The context of the enemies was just thrown together as well. On the boat level, you have to fight butlers, construction workers, and other generic bad, male enemies. What a waste of time.
7 ET – Atari (2.08)
Score: 8-9-4-1-9=31
I was surprised this didn’t end up higher for the level of failure it represented but it fell here. It was a nearly broken game that tried to cash in on the hit motion picture (several years after the movie was in theaters though). Can’t blame them for trying. They just did about as poor a job at creating the game, marketing the game and then managing the logistics of said game as is humanly possible. They buried their shame in the desert. That’s pretty epic.
6 Shaq-Fu – Genesis (24.06)
Score: 6-6-10-2-8=32
Let me quote the synopsis from Wikipedia.
“ In the game's storyline, Shaquille O'Neal wanders into a kung fu dojo while heading to a charity basketball game in Tokyo, Japan. There, he stumbles into another dimension, where he must rescue a young boy named Nezu from the evil mummy Sett-Ra."
What the #### were they on? Did Shaq pitch this himself or were they throwing crap at a dart board with random topics to find a string of ideas they thought worked? No one could be this ### #### stupid right? Amazingly it’s not completely unplayable for the time but still, how do you get past that storyline?
5 Ethnic Cleansing – PC (25.12)
Score: 8-5-8-5-8=34
It’s everything you’d expect from some screwed up, skinhead’s vision of what a video game should be. Killing blacks, Hispanics and Jews hiding in a sewer with the final boss being Ariel Sharon in his secret bunker about to take over the world. Thank god for this skinhead with a gun or else they might have gotten away with it. For 2003, this game is bad. It plays like they ignored any major gaming advance of the last decade but again, skinheads made this game to recruit skinheads. I don’t know if they achieved their goal but they succeeded in offending a lot of people, including gamers. Who would play this crap? It’s like what we should use for interrogation on terrorists to get them to talk just so they can stop playing this agonizing pile of dung.
4 Superman – N64 (9.07)
Score: 9-7-6-2-10=34
The Rings! That’s about all you’ll see. They’ll haunt your nightmares. It’s all just a bad dream for Superman. I can’t even do this game justice in a short blurb. Watch this.
, Jump to 3:20 to see the N64 version). All I can say is WTF?3 Wayne’s World – NES (26.13)
Score: 6-9-8-2-10=35
I was shocked by this one. I couldn’t imagine that a simple game about Wayne and Garth could be so abysmal. When researching it though, it truly is. I got to view the whole game in 9 minutes on a “Speed Run” video. First off Garth has a gun. Why he has a gun, who knows but he has one. It shoots an unlimited amount of bullets at an ungodly rate killing anything that would dare get in his way. What enemies might get in his way? How about giant drums with eyes, flying symbols, and other random inanimate objects that are brought to life with the goal of killing Wayne and Garth. Actually killing is a strong word. You have a ridiculous amount of health and if that’s not enough, there’s an ability to eat donuts in a “special stage” after each level. So onto Wayne. I mean if Garth gets an unlimited ammo gun, surely Wayne gets something equally as awesome, right? No, he kicks. He kicks his opponents to death. When does Wayne kick people? Anyway, it’s basically just as effective as the gun but its only close range. The whole game is a futile attempt to play through a recreation of the movie if you were on an acid trip. It actually comes close to succeeding if that were its intended goal. Sadly they were trying to make money off of this.
2 Custer’s Revenge – Atari (9.05)
Score: 7-7-10-5-10=39
I really thought this game was it. I mean how much worse does it get when you make a game for a 4 bit system about walking naked through the desert, dodging random arrows from the sky just to get to a 4 bit rendering of a Native American woman in order to rape her? I can’t imagine much worse. This offends everyone and it makes for a terrible game to play. Turns out that since this can actually be played as a game it falls just short of the #1 spot.
1 Plumbers Don’t Where Ties – 3DO (27.09)
Score: 10-8-10-3-10=41
Another one that caught me off guard. Didn’t expect masterpiece of video gaming prowess but I did at least expect a game. This is merely a slideshow that berates you if you don’t go through it properly. It’s a more like a film student’s bad final project. It has some of the worst editing or effects you can possibly imagine. I truly cannot do this justice. Just watch this.
Tell me that is not the biggest POS you have ever seen. No way can anyone argue with that being #1.
Note: With all my rankings, I look at the final list of games without regard to who has picked them for impartiality.
I have been a fan of ripping apart awful games since I first read EGM with Seanbaby’s “Rest of the Crap” on the last page. The truly awful drek he suffered through so we wouldn’t have to, is astounding. The hilarity continued with the Angry Video Gamer Nerd and his scathing reviews of all the old excrement that we tend to forget or ignore from the old systems. Worst Game Ever is a category I knew I had to judge because it can’t just be a bad game. We’ve all played those over the years. It has to fail on so many levels that the game can be considered worst of all time.
Again, I have chosen 5 categories to judge these failures on.
Unplayability: The reverse of gameplay. How impossible is it to play from just a technical standpoint?
Level of Fail: How far did the developers miss the mark of what they were aiming to do and what impact did it have as whole because of it.
Concept: How bad an idea was it to make this game? “What were they thinking?!”
Society Offense: How offensive was this game to society? (Rated on a 1-5 scale)
Gamer Offense: How offensive was this to a gamers’ intelligence?
All categories are based on a scale of 1-10 (10 being outstanding and 1 being god awful) except for the "Society Offense." That is based on a 1-5 scale. Five is full-on, in your face offensive. One is not very offensive. I chose to lower the amount of this category down otherwise some truly awful games may get left behind for a merely offensive game.
So with those criteria, here are the results.
13 Super Columbine Massacre RPG – PC (18.11)
Score: 3-2-8-5-6=24
When I first saw this title in the draft, I couldn’t imagine a more offensive topic to make a video game from. However, the circumstances surrounding the game make it less offensive and more thought provoking. The stated purpose of the game by the creator is not to make money or to gain notoriety. It was to create awareness of what was going through the minds of the killers for those that were not aware. Not the best approach in doing so as he made the game to look as a classic SNES or NES sprite driven RPG but it was effective in its delivery. Many people were offended just because of the name without ever playing the game. The game itself plays well and the narrative is a grim reminder of what was going on with these individuals. I think the creator achieved what he set out to do.
Man, what a heavy way to start this rankings list. Bad games should be mocked and laughed at for their awfulness not make you feel terrible about being a human being. Well they can do that too but usually after much laughter and derision.
12 The King of King: The Early Years – NES (25.04)
Score: 8-3-6-3-9=29
Ah a much more lighthearted bible journey about assault camels trying to reach the baby Jesus and other exploits from his early life. What a brutal game to watch in video. I can only imagine the level of bleh it was to actually play. The fact this was pirate software created by a Christian company to run unlicensed on the NES only makes it that much more awful. It was a really bad game but when all you’re setting out to do is create a few pirate games about the bible, well…mission accomplished.
11 Catfight: The Ultimate Female Fighting Game – PC (22.03)
Score: 7-4-6-3-9=29
Imagine Mortal Kombat with just poorly rendered female fighters, no differentiation in fighting maneuvers and the worst music and voice acting of any kind of imaginable awfulness. You get this mess. You would think it was created by a porn studio. Oh wait, it was. Vivid Entertainment was the parent company for the creator. This was a complete piece of crap but again, what were you expecting from a title like “Catfight: The Ultimate female fighting Game?”
10 Big Rigs: Over the Road Racing – PC (22.04)
Score: 10-4-5-1-10=30
What was truly amazing is that they packaged and sold this game for any price. We’ve all seen beta versions of games. Hell some of us have even seen alpha versions (basically just a testing screen for the barebones game). Those are made to build a game to its polished finish. This “game” doesn’t even qualify as an alpha version and yet they sold it. They sold it and said that it was “tested thoroughly” before they did. LIARS! Who could possibly have tested this and said “that’s ready to be played right there. Ship it.” There is no racing as your opponent never leaves the starting line. There is no control since you go from 0-60 instantly and stop on dime by taking your finger off the button. There isn’t any collision detection since objects can be passed through like nothing. Even the bridges are mere backdrops for this rigs rampage. You can drive vertically on mountains, fly through the sky and crash your game by clicking begin. The game was incomplete but it was also made by a no name company for a discount price of $5. Again, what were we expecting?
9 Leisure Suit Larry: Box Office Bust – Xbox360 (23.02)
Score: 7-6-5-4-8=30
Now this game had loftier expectations. Larry had an established history of tongue in cheek humor combined with witty, sexual innuendo. Even the reboot of the series in Magna Cum Laude was a decent pick up and play game that was merely mediocre but provided a few enjoyable moments. This game though took all that built up prestige (as much prestige as can be established from a game about a homely bald guy getting laid) and performed euthanasia on it. The jokes are not just offensive, they aren’t even funny. They make you feel bad for having seen it. Its stuff we wouldn’t watch or joke about even if we were into the hardest of the hardcore fetish porn and were just around other people who were into that. They might get offended by it as well. The minigames are crap. The actual females were several notches down from the last game as they looked more like a plastic surgeon’s nightmare than anything remotely sexy (by animated video game standards even). This game is a mess. Truthfully though, it’s not like it was advertised by anyone as being available (thankfully) and any money they made should have been paid out to families of the designers since they more than likely don’t have jobs anymore to support them. You know the titles above it are truly bad if this is only 9th.
8 Charlie’s Angels – GameCube (23.13)
Score: 7-8-4-3-8=30
Games based on movies are terrible in general but this game makes it an art form. They take bad gameplay and pointless objectives that have nothing to do with the movie and make it about as fun as getting kicked in the balls by Lucy Liu (if your into that, try to imagine it as a bad thing). No difference between the girls moves despite them saying so. Fighting through hoards and hoards of generic enemies to find that you were only doing it to press a button is more than idiotic. It’s downright insulting. The context of the enemies was just thrown together as well. On the boat level, you have to fight butlers, construction workers, and other generic bad, male enemies. What a waste of time.
7 ET – Atari (2.08)
Score: 8-9-4-1-9=31
I was surprised this didn’t end up higher for the level of failure it represented but it fell here. It was a nearly broken game that tried to cash in on the hit motion picture (several years after the movie was in theaters though). Can’t blame them for trying. They just did about as poor a job at creating the game, marketing the game and then managing the logistics of said game as is humanly possible. They buried their shame in the desert. That’s pretty epic.
6 Shaq-Fu – Genesis (24.06)
Score: 6-6-10-2-8=32
Let me quote the synopsis from Wikipedia.
“ In the game's storyline, Shaquille O'Neal wanders into a kung fu dojo while heading to a charity basketball game in Tokyo, Japan. There, he stumbles into another dimension, where he must rescue a young boy named Nezu from the evil mummy Sett-Ra."
What the #### were they on? Did Shaq pitch this himself or were they throwing crap at a dart board with random topics to find a string of ideas they thought worked? No one could be this ### #### stupid right? Amazingly it’s not completely unplayable for the time but still, how do you get past that storyline?
5 Ethnic Cleansing – PC (25.12)
Score: 8-5-8-5-8=34
It’s everything you’d expect from some screwed up, skinhead’s vision of what a video game should be. Killing blacks, Hispanics and Jews hiding in a sewer with the final boss being Ariel Sharon in his secret bunker about to take over the world. Thank god for this skinhead with a gun or else they might have gotten away with it. For 2003, this game is bad. It plays like they ignored any major gaming advance of the last decade but again, skinheads made this game to recruit skinheads. I don’t know if they achieved their goal but they succeeded in offending a lot of people, including gamers. Who would play this crap? It’s like what we should use for interrogation on terrorists to get them to talk just so they can stop playing this agonizing pile of dung.
4 Superman – N64 (9.07)
Score: 9-7-6-2-10=34
The Rings! That’s about all you’ll see. They’ll haunt your nightmares. It’s all just a bad dream for Superman. I can’t even do this game justice in a short blurb. Watch this.
, Jump to 3:20 to see the N64 version). All I can say is WTF?3 Wayne’s World – NES (26.13)
Score: 6-9-8-2-10=35
I was shocked by this one. I couldn’t imagine that a simple game about Wayne and Garth could be so abysmal. When researching it though, it truly is. I got to view the whole game in 9 minutes on a “Speed Run” video. First off Garth has a gun. Why he has a gun, who knows but he has one. It shoots an unlimited amount of bullets at an ungodly rate killing anything that would dare get in his way. What enemies might get in his way? How about giant drums with eyes, flying symbols, and other random inanimate objects that are brought to life with the goal of killing Wayne and Garth. Actually killing is a strong word. You have a ridiculous amount of health and if that’s not enough, there’s an ability to eat donuts in a “special stage” after each level. So onto Wayne. I mean if Garth gets an unlimited ammo gun, surely Wayne gets something equally as awesome, right? No, he kicks. He kicks his opponents to death. When does Wayne kick people? Anyway, it’s basically just as effective as the gun but its only close range. The whole game is a futile attempt to play through a recreation of the movie if you were on an acid trip. It actually comes close to succeeding if that were its intended goal. Sadly they were trying to make money off of this.
2 Custer’s Revenge – Atari (9.05)
Score: 7-7-10-5-10=39
I really thought this game was it. I mean how much worse does it get when you make a game for a 4 bit system about walking naked through the desert, dodging random arrows from the sky just to get to a 4 bit rendering of a Native American woman in order to rape her? I can’t imagine much worse. This offends everyone and it makes for a terrible game to play. Turns out that since this can actually be played as a game it falls just short of the #1 spot.
1 Plumbers Don’t Where Ties – 3DO (27.09)
Score: 10-8-10-3-10=41
Another one that caught me off guard. Didn’t expect masterpiece of video gaming prowess but I did at least expect a game. This is merely a slideshow that berates you if you don’t go through it properly. It’s a more like a film student’s bad final project. It has some of the worst editing or effects you can possibly imagine. I truly cannot do this justice. Just watch this.
Tell me that is not the biggest POS you have ever seen. No way can anyone argue with that being #1.
Andy Dufresne
Footballguy
Sea Ropes
Footballguy
Hack and Slash/Beat 'em Up
I can’t believe you dweebs didn’t draft Final Fight.
1. Batman: Arkham Asylum - PS3 (7.03) – Most superhero games suck. Arkham doesn’t. You can fight through this game depending on your mood. Personally, I like the stealthy approach and drop onto bad guys from the shadows, it just feels more cinematic that way. Although charging like a lunatic into a gang of dudes is fun too. The dark grimy feel is perfect for a Batman game.
2. River City Ransom - NES (9.02) – River City is easily a Time Top 5 All Time NES game. This certainly qualifies as a beat’em up, but RCR transcends that genre with RPG elements that made it extra deep. Even as an 8bit game, the characters were so expressive, for example, I loved watching the main character eat. IIRC, the story was serious but the gameplay remained lighthearted and really fun to play.
3. Devil May Cry 4 - PS3 (21.01) - #4 is a supped up version of the series’ previous installments. A new playable character was added, as was numerous ways to kill enemies. It’s hard to rank later versions of a game that’s also in the same category. DMC1 gets extra points for innovation and originality, but DMC4 gets the nod for its graphics and having bigger and badder stuff.
4. Diablo II - PC (6.05) – I never played this online (thank goodness), cuz I used to heard so much whining from people who got their loot jacked or hacked or jumped by other players. I really liked the single players even though I felt like my mouse was gonna break from all the clicking. All the items and RPG elements made it really fun to fight through the dungeons though.
5. Dead Rising - Xbox 360 (19.02) – I don’t own an Xbox but I think Dead Rising was the console’s flagship game that really showed off the 360’s processing power. With tons of zombies on screen and countless ways to kill them, Dead Rising was like a less Chinesey more funny zombified Dynasty Warriors.
6. X Men - Arcade (11.05) – There was a 6-Player cabinet version w/ a big long screen to fit all the mayhem. I used to love playing as Storm and wait until my buddies were almost dead before saving the day with my screenwide special cyclone attack. Unfortunately, the players at the edge of the cabinet had a crappy view of the action.
7. Devil May Cry - PS2 (12.07) – Dante was a pretty slick character; snazzy red coat, a big sword and a gun for crazy combos. The game set the player up to not just beat enemies, but to kill them with style and to unleash flashy special attacks. This game is the perfect hack and slasher for ADD kids that like lots of stimulating visuals.
8. Gauntlet - Arcade (6.02) – I think Gauntlet was the first ever 4-player arcade machine (not sure). The cool thing is, all the different characters really needed to do their job in order for the group to keep each other alive and effectively progress through the game without dropping tons of quarters. I didn’t like the top down view so much though.
9. Double Dragon - Arcade (7.08) – Ah yes, good ‘ole Double Dragon. (I actually bought the DD comic books cuz the guys looked really cool in the spiked armor.) What can be more fun that roaming the streets kicking the bad guys’ asses with a buddy? Knees to the face, a pipe to the head, double-teaming that big headed shirtless guy, fun as hell.
10. Golden Axe - Arcade (10.03) – What were those little guys that ran around between levels that you had to chop to get potions? Were they gnomes? Gremlins? Midgets? Anyway, a buff dude, a sexy chick in a fuzzy bikini and big blades slashing baddies was simple mindless fun. Oh, and the dwarf, and the riding of lizards was cool also.
11. The Simpsons - Arcade (13.06) – This game kinda just showed up at my local pizza joint one day and they joysticks have been greasy ever since. The graphics were predictably cartoony and bright, with sound effects straight from the show. You could use double team attacks and there were appearances by tons of Simpsons characters throughout the game. Most players preferred using Homer and Bart, whoever joined last got stuck with Lisa.
12. Battletoads - NES (18.01) – When I first heard about Battletoads, it thought it was just going to be a cheap TMNT copy. But Battletoads turned out to actually be a much more challenging game with more than just left to right fighting. They added racing/vehicle elements then funny exaggerated finishing moves to keep things fresh. But as a kid I found it a bit too difficult and never got very far.
13. Knights of the Round - SNES (23.10) – I had KotR on my SNES emulator and I loved it despite never having beat it. Knight was like a medieval Final Fight. You walk from left to right swinging your sword into enemies’ chests. There was a fast/weak guy (Lancelot), slow/strong (Galahad?) and medium (King Arthur) characters that you could upgrade with armor found in chests. Turkey dinner for extra health! W00t!
I can’t believe you dweebs didn’t draft Final Fight.
1. Batman: Arkham Asylum - PS3 (7.03) – Most superhero games suck. Arkham doesn’t. You can fight through this game depending on your mood. Personally, I like the stealthy approach and drop onto bad guys from the shadows, it just feels more cinematic that way. Although charging like a lunatic into a gang of dudes is fun too. The dark grimy feel is perfect for a Batman game.
2. River City Ransom - NES (9.02) – River City is easily a Time Top 5 All Time NES game. This certainly qualifies as a beat’em up, but RCR transcends that genre with RPG elements that made it extra deep. Even as an 8bit game, the characters were so expressive, for example, I loved watching the main character eat. IIRC, the story was serious but the gameplay remained lighthearted and really fun to play.
3. Devil May Cry 4 - PS3 (21.01) - #4 is a supped up version of the series’ previous installments. A new playable character was added, as was numerous ways to kill enemies. It’s hard to rank later versions of a game that’s also in the same category. DMC1 gets extra points for innovation and originality, but DMC4 gets the nod for its graphics and having bigger and badder stuff.
4. Diablo II - PC (6.05) – I never played this online (thank goodness), cuz I used to heard so much whining from people who got their loot jacked or hacked or jumped by other players. I really liked the single players even though I felt like my mouse was gonna break from all the clicking. All the items and RPG elements made it really fun to fight through the dungeons though.
5. Dead Rising - Xbox 360 (19.02) – I don’t own an Xbox but I think Dead Rising was the console’s flagship game that really showed off the 360’s processing power. With tons of zombies on screen and countless ways to kill them, Dead Rising was like a less Chinesey more funny zombified Dynasty Warriors.
6. X Men - Arcade (11.05) – There was a 6-Player cabinet version w/ a big long screen to fit all the mayhem. I used to love playing as Storm and wait until my buddies were almost dead before saving the day with my screenwide special cyclone attack. Unfortunately, the players at the edge of the cabinet had a crappy view of the action.
7. Devil May Cry - PS2 (12.07) – Dante was a pretty slick character; snazzy red coat, a big sword and a gun for crazy combos. The game set the player up to not just beat enemies, but to kill them with style and to unleash flashy special attacks. This game is the perfect hack and slasher for ADD kids that like lots of stimulating visuals.
8. Gauntlet - Arcade (6.02) – I think Gauntlet was the first ever 4-player arcade machine (not sure). The cool thing is, all the different characters really needed to do their job in order for the group to keep each other alive and effectively progress through the game without dropping tons of quarters. I didn’t like the top down view so much though.
9. Double Dragon - Arcade (7.08) – Ah yes, good ‘ole Double Dragon. (I actually bought the DD comic books cuz the guys looked really cool in the spiked armor.) What can be more fun that roaming the streets kicking the bad guys’ asses with a buddy? Knees to the face, a pipe to the head, double-teaming that big headed shirtless guy, fun as hell.
10. Golden Axe - Arcade (10.03) – What were those little guys that ran around between levels that you had to chop to get potions? Were they gnomes? Gremlins? Midgets? Anyway, a buff dude, a sexy chick in a fuzzy bikini and big blades slashing baddies was simple mindless fun. Oh, and the dwarf, and the riding of lizards was cool also.
11. The Simpsons - Arcade (13.06) – This game kinda just showed up at my local pizza joint one day and they joysticks have been greasy ever since. The graphics were predictably cartoony and bright, with sound effects straight from the show. You could use double team attacks and there were appearances by tons of Simpsons characters throughout the game. Most players preferred using Homer and Bart, whoever joined last got stuck with Lisa.
12. Battletoads - NES (18.01) – When I first heard about Battletoads, it thought it was just going to be a cheap TMNT copy. But Battletoads turned out to actually be a much more challenging game with more than just left to right fighting. They added racing/vehicle elements then funny exaggerated finishing moves to keep things fresh. But as a kid I found it a bit too difficult and never got very far.
13. Knights of the Round - SNES (23.10) – I had KotR on my SNES emulator and I loved it despite never having beat it. Knight was like a medieval Final Fight. You walk from left to right swinging your sword into enemies’ chests. There was a fast/weak guy (Lancelot), slow/strong (Galahad?) and medium (King Arthur) characters that you could upgrade with armor found in chests. Turkey dinner for extra health! W00t!
Sea Ropes
Footballguy
Nice.
Andy Dufresne
Footballguy
Really?
BlueDredSo
Footballguy
ET and Double Dragon got hosed big time.
Andy Dufresne
Footballguy
Yeah, I'm not liking this judging by some random personal criteria. I had hoped that judging would be done based on what is generally accepted.But whatever. There's no prizes...I don't think.
SlaX
Footballguy
I didn't expect Plumbers to get ranked worse than Superman, much less #1 worst game overall. I do have to add that the Atari 2600 is actually an 8-bit system. Most people don't realize that and make the mistake of calling it a lessor system. Most of the games that were programmed for the console didn't come close to utilizing the full potential of the system; likely due to video game programming being new for most people during that era.
Yo Mama
Footballguy
Ouch. Every list I saw out there had this worst of all time. The few that didn't had it second to only Custer or Superman.Oh well.
SlaX
Footballguy
It only gets that spot on everyone else's list because of it's bad rep for having the highest budget for its time and receiving bad sales due to lots of returns. It actually sold a lot, but back then, they allowed you to return opened copies of games just because you didn't like them. Sometimes, I wish they still allowed that. There also weren't anyone doing video game reviews back then either, so no one was around to say "don't buy this game, it's bad". Truth is, people that still call it the worst game today have likely never even played the game. They only say that due to reputation. There are far worse games than ET. IMO, there were far worse games on the Atari 2600 itself, for example, Custer's Revenge. When you consider that Atari had no quality control going on back then on who could make games and sale them, you can imagine the #### that was made available for the system. You can't tell me that there aren't games worse than ET. But they don't get the reputation that ET does, because it didn't cost the company, and the video game industry, millions of dollars.
Yo Mama
Footballguy
But that's what makes ET such an epic failure, the huge amounts of money, effort, and expectations built into it. I'm sure a Jr programmer at the local community college could put together a worse game, but it wouldn't be as big of a disappointment as ET.
Mario Kart
Footballguy
These were easy 13 pointers each. Where is Jar Jar to call a vote of no confidence?
SlaX
Footballguy
True, but in the 3 week span they had to create the game, they actually did create a game that was playable (I know, this is debatable), beatable (something that was rare in Atari days), had decent graphics (you could tell who was ET, Elliott, and the agents, and what were trees), and it had the ET theme song in the open of the game (don't tell me this doesn't count. There are a lot of movie licensed games out there that don't have the theme song in them, and there's no excuse!).I'm not saying it's a good game. I'm simply debating that it's not the worst game.
larry_boy_44
Footballguy
I was going to draft Final Fight, but it is only 1-player on the SNES (the only way I played it), so I pikced the Final Fight clone with swords figuring I'd get SOMETHING out of it...guess I was wrong...
bmarks6161
Footballguy
quite disappointed in my double dragon ranking to be honest, otherwise good stuff
Jojo the circus boy
Footballguy
No Paperboy, Zaxxon, Defender, Missile Command, Leisure Suit Larry (PC) or Asteroids (2600)?
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rikishiboy
Footballguy
Definately geared heavily toward the younger generation...Double Dragon, Golden Axe, and The Simpsons should of been much higher up the list.
rikishiboy
Footballguy
The terms Game Boy and back in the day do not go together.
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Mario Kart
Footballguy
Definitely. My consortium and I all agree, without a doubt, that Gauntlet is the only 13 pointer in that group.
Adebisi
Footballguy
I could be mistaken, but I thought you had posted earlier in this thread that you were drafting based on your own personal likes/dislikes, and not what was generally accepted. No?
IvanKaramazov
Footballguy
I had both Pac-Man and ET for the 2600, and it's not fair to compare them to completely irrelevant games like the trucking game or Custer's Revenge. These were hugely-marketed blockbuster titles that absolutely sucked. You know why Generation X is so cynical and jaded? It's because we got these games as Christmas presents when we were kids, that's why.Sure, there are games out there that are worse from a technical standpoint, but those games didn't cause the entire console industry to implode on itself.
Steve Tasker
Footballguy
I'll try to get a few of my ranks in this weekend.
