How long did it take your wife/gf to get pregnant? (1 Viewer)

[El Floppo]

No kids here. Life is still awesome.

Why is your friend and his wife still stressing so much? Aren't the two of them late 20s or early 30s?

Relax. Save some money over the next couple years and then get it done. Who knows....maybe in the mean time it ends up happening naturally.

with all do respect, why even post this. Coming off as a big DB.

Woz - go visit that other thread....all people who have gone through this before.

Wtf? How was that in any way coming off as a DB?

"Why is your wife even stressing about this?"

Clearly, you've never been through this. To ask that question is incredibly insulting.

I had the same knee-jerk reaction with the first two lines, fwiw...

but it appears you didn't get to the last line.

 

[Steed]

Anyone that needs pricing on meds, pm me. I have access to all wholesale prices and can give you some leverage in negotiations

 

[larch]

Also, have you been through the adoption process? It's not as simple as you seem to think. It's also very expensive, and a huge hassle in a number of ways. I know because we started down that path before turning to a donor- partially because we wanted the genetic connection and the connection you get through pregnancy, but partially because even though it was also difficult it was actually the path of least resistance.

I have never had to go down either route so I don't know what the IVF/adoption process goes through. I would have guessed that adoption would be cheaper than IVF.

 

[TobiasFunke]

Also, have you been through the adoption process? It's not as simple as you seem to think. It's also very expensive, and a huge hassle in a number of ways. I know because we started down that path before turning to a donor- partially because we wanted the genetic connection and the connection you get through pregnancy, but partially because even though it was also difficult it was actually the path of least resistance.

I have never had to go down either route so I don't know what the IVF/adoption process goes through. I would have guessed that adoption would be cheaper than IVF.

Probably, and there's tax incentives too. But it's a really really complex process. It can take years, assuming you want an infant. Your options are: (1) adopt a foreign baby, which is a huge bureaucratic nightmare as you'd expect, sometimes is delayed until the child is several months old, and I'm told is getting much harder these days; or (2) adopt an American baby, in which case you have to apply and hope you get selected, and even if you are the birth mother can pull the rug out from under you at any time, including well after "your" baby is born in some states. It's a total nightmare ... and it's not like you're "saving" the kid when you do that anyway, since as I said there's far more applicants than babies.

 

[Zow]

Also, have you been through the adoption process? It's not as simple as you seem to think. It's also very expensive, and a huge hassle in a number of ways. I know because we started down that path before turning to a donor- partially because we wanted the genetic connection and the connection you get through pregnancy, but partially because even though it was also difficult it was actually the path of least resistance.

I have never had to go down either route so I don't know what the IVF/adoption process goes through. I would have guessed that adoption would be cheaper than IVF.

Probably, and there's tax incentives too. But it's a really really complex process. It can take years, assuming you want an infant. Your options are: (1) adopt a foreign baby, which is a huge bureaucratic nightmare as you'd expect, sometimes is delayed until the child is several months old, and I'm told is getting much harder these days; or (2) adopt an American baby, in which case you have to apply and hope you get selected, and even if you are the birth mother can pull the rug out from under you at any time, including well after "your" baby is born in some states. It's a total nightmare ... and it's not like you're "saving" the kid when you do that anyway, since as I said there's far more applicants than babies.

Well, option three is to go through the foster care route. My wife and I have actually begun that process. Benefit there is that there's no cost (in fact, the state may actually pay you money). Huge downside though is that if you take in an infant there is still a period of time where the parent could get the child back or the child could be placed with a relative. Also, while i'm not going to call it a downside, there is a potential complication in that the child will likely have been born substance exposed.

 

[Zow]

Also, have you been through the adoption process? It's not as simple as you seem to think. It's also very expensive, and a huge hassle in a number of ways. I know because we started down that path before turning to a donor- partially because we wanted the genetic connection and the connection you get through pregnancy, but partially because even though it was also difficult it was actually the path of least resistance.

I have never had to go down either route so I don't know what the IVF/adoption process goes through. I would have guessed that adoption would be cheaper than IVF.

Traditional adoption, at least out of pocket, isn't. Adoption services we've looked into are about $30k whereas IVF is around $21k.

 

[Good Posting Judge]

Nathan Arizona just had quints. Surely he won't miss one, right?

 

[Zow]

No kids here. Life is still awesome.

Why is your friend and his wife still stressing so much? Aren't the two of them late 20s or early 30s?

Relax. Save some money over the next couple years and then get it done. Who knows....maybe in the mean time it ends up happening naturally.

with all do respect, why even post this. Coming off as a big DB.

Woz - go visit that other thread....all people who have gone through this before.

Wtf? How was that in any way coming off as a DB?

No worries, I didn't take it as douchy or insulting or anything. Obviously we know we have a few years before time becomes an issue and currently we are doing quite well financially and life is awesome.

But, the just relaxing part is incredibly hard. Especially for my wife. We've made major life decisions (getting married, me taking my current job which caused us to move to an area which wasn't our first choice, etc.) in large part because we are both on the same page that we wanted children at this time period. We've both worked hard, done good things in life, and are both at a point where we want and are able to have children. We've both had our fun in our twenties, both have spent three years doing fun couple things and living a fun married/dating life, and I'm kicking butt enough at work and making enough that I have a stable job with a good income that my wife can stay home with the child. This may sound a bit conceited, but it's hard not to think that we deserve a child since we've done things so "right".

All that said, finding out then that it's incredibly unlikely, due to no fault of our own, that we can conceive naturally and finding out then that our options require us to be in a financial situation we both tried incredibly hard to avoid, is just a big huge kick in the nuts. While it's purely coincidental and nobody's fault, it just doesn't seem "fair" when we want a child so badly. Add onto that fact that we're of the age where the majority of our friends and acquaintances are spitting out kids left and right, and I work in a job where I encounter children being frequently born into less ideal situations, makes it feel like you're being kicked in the shin while being kicked in the nuts. As such, it's hard to just relax.

 

[fred_1_15301]

No kids here. Life is still awesome.

Why is your friend and his wife still stressing so much? Aren't the two of them late 20s or early 30s?

Relax. Save some money over the next couple years and then get it done. Who knows....maybe in the mean time it ends up happening naturally.

with all do respect, why even post this. Coming off as a big DB.

Woz - go visit that other thread....all people who have gone through this before.

Wtf? How was that in any way coming off as a DB?

No worries, I didn't take it as douchy or insulting or anything. Obviously we know we have a few years before time becomes an issue and currently we are doing quite well financially and life is awesome. But, the just relaxing part is incredibly hard. Especially for my wife. We've made major life decisions (getting married, me taking my current job which caused us to move to an area which wasn't our first choice, etc.) in large part because we are both on the same page that we wanted children at this time period. We've both worked hard, done good things in life, and are both at a point where we want and are able to have children. We've both had our fun in our twenties, both have spent three years doing fun couple things and living a fun married/dating life, and I'm kicking butt enough at work and making enough that I have a stable job with a good income that my wife can stay home with the child. This may sound a bit conceited, but it's hard not to think that we deserve a child since we've done things so "right".

All that said, finding out then that it's incredibly unlikely, due to no fault of our own, that we can conceive naturally and finding out then that our options require us to be in a financial situation we both tried incredibly hard to avoid, is just a big huge kick in the nuts. While it's purely coincidental and nobody's fault, it just doesn't seem "fair" when we want a child so badly. Add onto that fact that we're of the age where the majority of our friends and acquaintances are spitting out kids left and right, and I work in a job where I encounter children being frequently born into less ideal situations, makes it feel like you're being kicked in the shin while being kicked in the nuts. As such, it's hard to just relax.

You have just described exactly how my wife and I felt the years before we were successful. Acupuncture did wonders in terms of helping my wife relax and improve her overall mental health. Just something she (or even you) may want to consider.

 

[Zow]

No kids here. Life is still awesome.

Why is your friend and his wife still stressing so much? Aren't the two of them late 20s or early 30s?

Relax. Save some money over the next couple years and then get it done. Who knows....maybe in the mean time it ends up happening naturally.

with all do respect, why even post this. Coming off as a big DB.

Woz - go visit that other thread....all people who have gone through this before.

Wtf? How was that in any way coming off as a DB?

No worries, I didn't take it as douchy or insulting or anything. Obviously we know we have a few years before time becomes an issue and currently we are doing quite well financially and life is awesome. But, the just relaxing part is incredibly hard. Especially for my wife. We've made major life decisions (getting married, me taking my current job which caused us to move to an area which wasn't our first choice, etc.) in large part because we are both on the same page that we wanted children at this time period. We've both worked hard, done good things in life, and are both at a point where we want and are able to have children. We've both had our fun in our twenties, both have spent three years doing fun couple things and living a fun married/dating life, and I'm kicking butt enough at work and making enough that I have a stable job with a good income that my wife can stay home with the child. This may sound a bit conceited, but it's hard not to think that we deserve a child since we've done things so "right".

All that said, finding out then that it's incredibly unlikely, due to no fault of our own, that we can conceive naturally and finding out then that our options require us to be in a financial situation we both tried incredibly hard to avoid, is just a big huge kick in the nuts. While it's purely coincidental and nobody's fault, it just doesn't seem "fair" when we want a child so badly. Add onto that fact that we're of the age where the majority of our friends and acquaintances are spitting out kids left and right, and I work in a job where I encounter children being frequently born into less ideal situations, makes it feel like you're being kicked in the shin while being kicked in the nuts. As such, it's hard to just relax.

You have just described exactly how my wife and I felt the years before we were successful. Acupuncture did wonders in terms of helping my wife relax and improve her overall mental health. Just something she (or even you) may want to consider.

Never thought of that. I'll broach this with her.

 

[trogg78]

Usually it only took a month or two. This time we had been trying for over a year. Finally went to a fertility doctor and had us both tested and found nothing wrong. The next test was to see if her tubes were clogged likely from some scaring from her last c-section. They insert dye to find the clog. No scarring was found but they had suggested the dye may have cleared any clogs. She got a positive pregnancy test on her next cycle.

 

[eoMMan]

Good luck with everything, bud.

 

[Zow]

Good luck with everything, bud.

Thanks.

 

[Zow]

On our way to appointment. 2.5 he drive. Think the wife is about to have a nervous breakdown

 

[Rick James]

Good luck man

 

[fred_1_15301]

On our way to appointment. 2.5 he drive. Think the wife is about to have a nervous breakdown

Just think of this as the beginning of what will most likely be a long and incredible journey together. Appreciate your time without a baby. Honestly

 

[Zow]

Will update later. Just got to hotel in vegas. Time to get drunk. That was an insane morning.

 

[fantasycurse42]

I think my sperm is magical... In the 8 years I've been with my wife, I've shot inside of her twice, the first time landed me my son. Most recently was Tuesday, 6/2.

This is the result

I assume the lines are so faint bc the pregnancy is literally in its earliest stages. We took 3 bc the lines kept coming up so faint and I just thought it was impossible.

Anyways, my wife won't let me share the news with anyone for at least 4-6 weeks, so I've got to just sit on this.

Also a little nervous bc we did some heavy drinking on Friday before we found out... Everything I read says this is really no big deal, but still need to talk to the OBGYN to ease my concerns.

 

[Bucky86]

I think my sperm is magical... In the 8 years I've been with my wife, I've shot inside of her twice, the first time landed me my son. Most recently was Tuesday, 6/2.

This is the result

I assume the lines are so faint bc the pregnancy is literally in its earliest stages. We took 3 bc the lines kept coming up so faint and I just thought it was impossible.

Anyways, my wife won't let me share the news with anyone for at least 4-6 weeks, so I've got to just sit on this.

Also a little nervous bc we did some heavy drinking on Friday before we found out... Everything I read says this is really no big deal, but still need to talk to the OBGYN to ease my concerns.

I've never seen a pregnancy test in person. Is the one red line always there?

 

[fantasycurse42]

I think my sperm is magical... In the 8 years I've been with my wife, I've shot inside of her twice, the first time landed me my son. Most recently was Tuesday, 6/2.

This is the result

I assume the lines are so faint bc the pregnancy is literally in its earliest stages. We took 3 bc the lines kept coming up so faint and I just thought it was impossible.

Anyways, my wife won't let me share the news with anyone for at least 4-6 weeks, so I've got to just sit on this.

Also a little nervous bc we did some heavy drinking on Friday before we found out... Everything I read says this is really no big deal, but still need to talk to the OBGYN to ease my concerns.

I've never seen a pregnancy test in person. Is the one red line always there?

One line is always present if the test worked. If no lines are present you need to retake.

 

[MattFancy]

Happened 1st try with our daughter

2nd time took 2 tries (miscarriage)

Still trying again (been about 5 months)

 

[Bucky86]

I think my sperm is magical... In the 8 years I've been with my wife, I've shot inside of her twice, the first time landed me my son. Most recently was Tuesday, 6/2.

This is the result

I assume the lines are so faint bc the pregnancy is literally in its earliest stages. We took 3 bc the lines kept coming up so faint and I just thought it was impossible.

Anyways, my wife won't let me share the news with anyone for at least 4-6 weeks, so I've got to just sit on this.

Also a little nervous bc we did some heavy drinking on Friday before we found out... Everything I read says this is really no big deal, but still need to talk to the OBGYN to ease my concerns.

I've never seen a pregnancy test in person. Is the one red line always there?

One line is always present if the test worked. If no lines are present you need to retake.

Gotcha. thx

 

[fantasycurse42]

Happened 1st try with our daughter

2nd time took 2 tries (miscarriage)

Still trying again (been about 5 months)

Sorry dude, up to 20 percent end in miscarriages from the reading I've done today, with the vast majority being in the first 8-12 weeks.

How old are you and your wife?

 

[MattFancy]

Happened 1st try with our daughter

2nd time took 2 tries (miscarriage)

Still trying again (been about 5 months)

Sorry dude, up to 20 percent end in miscarriages from the reading I've done today, with the vast majority being in the first 8-12 weeks.

How old are you and your wife?

We were 28 then, 29 now. Had our daughter when we were 26. Everything went perfectly there.

If there's any silver lining on the miscarriage, thankfully it was very early, like 6-8 weeks in. Still sucked though. We've been trying since Dec/Jan but still have nothing. Was so easy the 1st time.

 

[fantasycurse42]

Happened 1st try with our daughter

2nd time took 2 tries (miscarriage)

Still trying again (been about 5 months)

Sorry dude, up to 20 percent end in miscarriages from the reading I've done today, with the vast majority being in the first 8-12 weeks.

How old are you and your wife?

We were 28 then, 29 now. Had our daughter when we were 26. Everything went perfectly there.

If there's any silver lining on the miscarriage, thankfully it was very early, like 6-8 weeks in. Still sucked though. We've been trying since Dec/Jan but still have nothing. Was so easy the 1st time.

I'm sure that sucked, sorry about that... The good news is you're both still young and should hopefully have a healthy pregnancy when it happens again.

Tomorrow is just 2 weeks, so we have another 2.5 months before we can start getting comfortable.

 

[MattFancy]

Happened 1st try with our daughter

2nd time took 2 tries (miscarriage)

Still trying again (been about 5 months)

Sorry dude, up to 20 percent end in miscarriages from the reading I've done today, with the vast majority being in the first 8-12 weeks.

How old are you and your wife?

We were 28 then, 29 now. Had our daughter when we were 26. Everything went perfectly there.

If there's any silver lining on the miscarriage, thankfully it was very early, like 6-8 weeks in. Still sucked though. We've been trying since Dec/Jan but still have nothing. Was so easy the 1st time.

I'm sure that sucked, sorry about that... The good news is you're both still young and should hopefully have a healthy pregnancy when it happens again.

Tomorrow is just 2 weeks, so we have another 2.5 months before we can start getting comfortable.

Yeah we definitely have plenty of time ahead of us. Just frustrating.

Good luck to you!!

 

[xulf]

I think my sperm is magical... In the 8 years I've been with my wife, I've shot inside of her twice, the first time landed me my son. Most recently was Tuesday, 6/2.

This is the result

I assume the lines are so faint bc the pregnancy is literally in its earliest stages. We took 3 bc the lines kept coming up so faint and I just thought it was impossible.

Anyways, my wife won't let me share the news with anyone for at least 4-6 weeks, so I've got to just sit on this.

Also a little nervous bc we did some heavy drinking on Friday before we found out... Everything I read says this is really no big deal, but still need to talk to the OBGYN to ease my concerns.

Congrats

My story is similar for my two girls. I'm not looking for a third

 

[That one guy]

4 years...she had a miscarriage on our 1st wedding anniversary (weren't really "trying" at that time, but weren't opposed to having kids, either). The knowledge of that pregnancy lasted barely 72 hours: went from "I'm kind of 'late'", to "we're pregnant!", to utter heartbreak. 2 years of natural method brought nothing, went to artificial insemenation (4 tries) with no success, lastly IVF (that month+ long procedure was probably harder on us than the miscarriage)...that was 15 months ago and we now have a beautiful, healthy, 6 month old girl!

 

[Spin]

I think my sperm is magical... In the 8 years I've been with my wife, I've shot inside of her twice, the first time landed me my son. Most recently was Tuesday, 6/2.

This is the result

I assume the lines are so faint bc the pregnancy is literally in its earliest stages. We took 3 bc the lines kept coming up so faint and I just thought it was impossible.

Anyways, my wife won't let me share the news with anyone for at least 4-6 weeks, so I've got to just sit on this.

Also a little nervous bc we did some heavy drinking on Friday before we found out... Everything I read says this is really no big deal, but still need to talk to the OBGYN to ease my concerns.

Grats!

FYI my first son was conceived a few days before a night of heavy drinking (In Detroit a few years back when the Niners ended their win-streak!) and the OBGYN said to not worry about it. And he came out perfect.

 

[Spin]

My first came while my girl-friend at the time (later my wife) was still on birth control, unfortunately that ended in a misscarriage. She switched to the pill after that, and it worked fine.

My first son was born after she was off the pill for ~6 months. We didn't start "actively trying" til about 3 months later though. IE she was charting her ovulation times etc. She started stressing out after not being on the pill, especially following a miscarriage, when we got the good news.

My 2nd son was almost a year after she was off the pill. Never charted, or really even stressed about it, just decided we wanted another kid and when it happened it would happen. It took a lot longer then the first time, but was a much more relaxed "planned" pregnancy.

And after two crazier-then-hell pregnancies, we're gonna schedule a vasectomy. 2 is enough for me.

 

[RUSF18]

Wife and I are planning on trying for our first soon...probably within another 6 weeks or so. She was on some pretty heavy migraine medicine that could lead to the baby having some serious problems, so we needed to give a few months for her to wean herself off it, and then another few months out of her system to be safe...which we're about half way through now. She's been off the pill for a few months now too so we're going with the old pull out method and while it's not exactly torture (like pizza, it's always good), god bless you guys who only soak the walls when trying to conceive a child. I can't wait to get back to that.

 

[lumpy19]

baby 1 - 3 tries/miscarriage/3 tries, whole thing ~9 months

baby 2 - 1 try

baby 3 - 9 tries

All over the map for my wife and I.

 

[fantasycurse42]

Wife is only 2 weeks pregnant and already exercising her right to be 3x the lunatic of a typical female... The next 9 months (knock on wood) are going to call for extreme patience and understanding.

:deepbreaths:

 

[MattFancy]

Wife is only 2 weeks pregnant and already exercising her right to be 3x the lunatic of a typical female... The next 9 months (knock on wood) are going to call for extreme patience and understanding.

:deepbreaths:

That's when you exercise your right to have a DD for the next 9 months!

 

[xulf]

Wife is only 2 weeks pregnant and already exercising her right to be 3x the lunatic of a typical female... The next 9 months (knock on wood) are going to call for extreme patience and understanding.

:deepbreaths:

I love the "Im eating for two!!!" response when you shoot them a look when they go after that second piece of cake at these early stages.