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This place is going to die of fear. (2 Viewers)

The standing ovation is because it's an 8 and 1/2 minute song about the FFA! People were applauding the effort it must have taken to make it happen. Many people contributed. Many forum members and forum events were mentioned. And then Bigbottom made it sound like something you'd hear on the radio. I mean, listen to those harmonies! This was top notch production value and it was all done right here, in-house. Those were the reasons the forum responded with a "standing ovation".

Thanks for everything you do in terms of this forum. Sorry you have to deal with stuff in the PF and 99% of us are saddened and disgusted that you have to deal with jerks who send you nasty PM''s or take personal shots at you or your family. Most all of us agree there those things are awful. But this parody song, artsy shtick, time capsule of the FFA, labor of love, whatever you want to call it, does not come from the same place as the horrible stuff you mentioned. It was born out of a love for this place and meant as a celebration of it. I hope there will be a time the light in your mind can shine on it differently and you see it for what it really is and smile.
well said.

 
LOL at distressing over The Day the Laughter Died.  I don't think any of us who helped write that song thought we were making any type of coherent statement about the moderation of the board.  We were just trying to amuse one another.  I mean, it we were trying to be serious, the entire song would have been about the injustice of banning power tool pictures.

 
That song was written over a decade ago I think and there were at least a half a dozen co-authors. I know there was a story behind that line (there was a story behind every line) but simply don’t recall it (that wasn’t one of my contributions). 


It also wasn't one of my lines, and I actually think it's one of a few lines where someone kind of made something up.  One story I do remember vividly about Joe around that time is that he once professed to be unaware of the trope about Jews being good with money and got pretty feisty when I expressed disbelief at that.  So that might have been on someone's mind.  

I enjoyed listening again.  I had forgotten most of what I had contributed except the cheap shot at MacArtist.

 
It also wasn't one of my lines, and I actually think it's one of a few lines where someone kind of made something up.  One story I do remember vividly about Joe around that time is that he once professed to be unaware of the trope about Jews being good with money and got pretty feisty when I expressed disbelief at that.  So that might have been on someone's mind.  

I enjoyed listening again.  I had forgotten most of what I had contributed except the cheap shot at MacArtist.
Well there you go!

 
It also wasn't one of my lines, and I actually think it's one of a few lines where someone kind of made something up.  One story I do remember vividly about Joe around that time is that he once professed to be unaware of the trope about Jews being good with money and got pretty feisty when I expressed disbelief at that.  So that might have been on someone's mind.  

I enjoyed listening again.  I had forgotten most of what I had contributed except the cheap shot at MacArtist.


Thanks. So one of the lines illustrating the "hilarity" of the forum talking of kicking off Jews for not having Christian views was actually just kind of made up? Awesome.

 
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Thanks. So one of the lines illustrating the "hilarity" of the forum talking of kicking off Jews for not having Christian views was actually just kind of made up? Awesome.
I said upthread that it was obviously not true that you kicked people out of the forums for sharing non-Christian views. 

 
Cool. That's awesome. 
As I said, I don’t recall who wrote the line or why the line was written. It was 15 years ago. If we had this discussion back then, I would have been able to offer more than what I am offering now, which is my sincere apology that this has and continues to hurt your feelings and discourage you. The line is obviously untrue, but it is also admittedly unfair. Despite my earlier posts, I want you to know that I get it. I also want you to know that all the positive things I’ve said about you in this thread and other threads, I mean 100% from the bottom of my heart. I suspect that may not mean much at the moment. 

 
Thanks. So one of the lines illustrating the "hilarity" of the forum talking of kicking off Jews for not having Christian views was actually just kind of made up? Awesome.
I don't know for sure.  But I don't recall anyone fact checking every line, no.  It was a parody song.  Written by half a dozen people.  Some of whom were making fun of the moderators and some of whom were making fun of the people who always complained about the moderators.  

Maybe speak up at the time next time instead of stewing about for a decade?   :shrug:

 
I don't know for sure.  But I don't recall anyone fact checking every line, no.  It was a parody song.  Written by half a dozen people.  Some of whom were making fun of the moderators and some of whom were making fun of the people who always complained about the moderators.  

Maybe speak up at the time next time instead of stewing about for a decade?   :shrug:


Thanks. 

 
As I recall it, here were the prime thoughts motivating us as we drafted individual lines:

1. Does it rhyme?

2.  Does it have generally the right number of syllables?

3. If no for 2, can we fudge it?

9,983.  Does it state a fair and accurate critique about the moderation policy on the board?

 
As I recall it, here were the prime thoughts motivating us as we drafted individual lines:

1. Does it rhyme?

2.  Does it have generally the right number of syllables?

3. If no for 2, can we fudge it?

9,983.  Does it state a fair and accurate critique about the moderation policy on the board?


👍

 
I think the whole view of “saying another ADULT woman is beautiful” is considered “creepy” is pretty bad. 
Okay, let’s be fair here. That’s not what Joe said. To be sure, we all have different perspectives and tolerance levels, but things like the Babe Bracket and Russian Bride Draft threads and the commentary accompanying them involved more than simply saying another adult woman is beautiful.

 
Let's lock this up and move on.  We are all friends here (for twenty years - 20!!!!) and this conversation isn't productive.  Give me the keys, I'll do it. 


Thanks GB. It's maybe not been a fun conversation but it's been extremely helpful and productive for me to get better clarity. I'm always thankful for that. 

 
I fully believe the song was written with no malicious intent, particularly with BigBottom's involvement as he has proved numerous times over the years to be a truly stand up person. In communication, there is intent and there is impact. What was intended to be a parody song was received just that way by the masses (i.e. by people who were not the "target") but it impacted Joe in particular (and perhaps others on the moderation team, I don't know) in a really negative way. What I've seen in this thread (for the most part) is "You shouldn't feel that way". 

Perhaps you can make that argument of "It's just a joke, laugh and move on".  That is in fact what Joe did for over a decade, as someone asked why he waited so long (well he probably didn't laugh, but he didn't make it an issue).  If you poke fun at the structure of the moderation as that of a middle age white guy with a stick up his butt, that is probably fair game.  It is mind-boggling to me that some people don't seem to understand that you can't have a throwaway line that is anti-Semitic just because "Jews" rhymes with views and you think it is funny. Again, I fully believe that the many writers did not intend to make this accusation, but that is how it has been received and I think it is an entirely reasonable conclusion to arrive at if the song is heard by a new poster who doesn't have the benefit of context of decades worth of posts. I think that line is unfair and I understand why it hurts.  I don't believe any of us want anything ascribed to us that has no foundation in reality, I certainly have enough flaws that people could make jokes with at least a kernel of truth in them.

As to the other moderation efforts, all I can say is times change and people change. I think people started evaluating what was right and what was wrong, and not only looking at right and wrong from their viewpoint, but trying to expand it to understand other viewpoints.  At the start of the boards, PG meant clothed women, even bikinis if they weren't too revealing. R was reserved for nudity. People make jokes about "that is someone's daughter" but I think it is true. Even if fully clothed, is allowing the objectification of women something we want society to continue with? The comments weren't usually as tame as "That is a beautiful adult woman".  There wasn't technical analysis of "She has high cheekbones". Having a bunch of fat, bald, middle age guys say things like "I'd give her a go" as if she would even look your way in real life can easily be construed as creepy.  If you don't think so, go to friend's Facebook or Instagram page and start making those types of comments on his 20 year old daughter.

Lastly, to the laughing emoji. You are right, it is ridiculous for the moderation team to have to come to the decision to ban the use of it. Proudly, I have made either 0 or 1 post in the PSF (I think I started to post something and then backed out, but I may have posted it). I do not know who or which side abused it, I'm guessing it was multiple people and both sides. An argument could be made as others suggested to ban those posters who were abusing it. I'm guessing that was discussed, but that takes a lot of time from moderators, and it doesn't eliminate the misuse of the emoji by an alias or by others weaponizing it. I'm guessing at the end, the decision was made (probably with some on the mod team shaking their head that it came to this) to remove the emoji. In my uninformed opinion, you could probably state that misuse of the laughing emoji is a bannable offense so the rest of the community could use it as intended, but again I think the decision was probably made due to moderation resources.

I do love being a small part of this community and I hope it continues on.

 
Okay, let’s be fair here. That’s not what Joe said. To be sure, we all have different perspectives and tolerance levels, but things like the Babe Bracket and Russian Bride Draft threads and the commentary accompanying them involved more than simply saying another adult woman is beautiful.
True, but the end result is that nothing is allowed. I can’t post about a movie and say  “whoa, that actress is hot!”.

 
I fully believe the song was written with no malicious intent, particularly with BigBottom's involvement as he has proved numerous times over the years to be a truly stand up person. In communication, there is intent and there is impact. What was intended to be a parody song was received just that way by the masses (i.e. by people who were not the "target") but it impacted Joe in particular (and perhaps others on the moderation team, I don't know) in a really negative way. What I've seen in this thread (for the most part) is "You shouldn't feel that way". 


I've been thinking of this distinction a lot since yesterday, and you are right.  Most people (including me) have been arguing intent, when that's not the only - or even the most - important factor.  Excellent post.

 
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Thanks. I truly wish I could see it as something other than discouragement and failure.

Given the responses, I think it's pretty clear what I've created there with people giving standing ovations to the song with lines about how I suspend Jews for not having Christian views. 

I shared your post with some real life friends that know me this morning and are fascinated by the forum. The response was:

"I'm sorry. That's awful. Is this hurtful, discouraging, just part of business? That and ten more things?
You have thick skin."

I told him those were pretty much the exact mix of feelings I have. He knows me well.

Except I think my friend thinks I have way thicker skin than I really do. 
Joe, come on!  It’s a joke. An obvious joke. It’s like a weird Al yankovich song.  Having been here since ole yeller, the names alone in the song make me smile.  Regardless of context. 
 

this place was/is amazing.  If it wasn’t, people wouldn't give a #### and move on. Like anything and everything, everyone has an opinion on how it should be run. Screw em!  You do you. 

 
Joe:  I think you’re an awesome person, and we’ve had some deeply personal interactions over the years, which have been very meaningful to me. So I’m going to do my best here to be a friend and give it to you straight, as I would to any of my closest friends. You’re being ridiculous. I told you, both here and in private messages, that the song was meant to be tongue in cheek. Of course you don’t suspend people for having non-Christian views. I wish I could remember the story behind that line, but it’s facially obvious hyperbole and not to be taken literally. As mentioned upthread, your unwillingness to accept that it was meant to be tongue in cheek, when the person who was involved in its creation is telling you expressly that it was meant to be tongue in cheek, is akin to an example of assuming the worst in others, something you speak out against. You have created something absolutely special here. Something that has allowed a community of people to come together and celebrate the highs in life with one another, while supporting each other during the hardest of times. Surely you know that I understand this as much as anyone. This song is a parody. It is satire. It is hyperbolic and non-literal by design. And it is a celebration of all of the amazing hilarity that has occurred over the years within this small but special community.  A community that exists because of you. Your undue (in my opinion) focus on one line in the song, which is obviously not true, is, I think, causing you to miss what is special about the song. And I’ve come to conclude that perhaps you’re missing what is special about this amazing place that you’ve created. And that’s a real shame.
I'll just add on to this that comedy is meant to make you laugh, but really good comedy takes some kernels of truth and hopefully makes you think about things in a different way.  I think the song was a celebration of the stories, posters, and times of the FFA as well as a bit of a heads up to owners, moderators, etc to look at what they were doing and how they were approaching things.  I'll echo what others have said that you helped to create something great here.  I have several real life friends now because of it.  People I'd do anything for and know they'd do anything for me.  Nothing and no one is perfect, don't dwell on those things, learn from them.

 
I fully believe the song was written with no malicious intent, particularly with BigBottom's involvement as he has proved numerous times over the years to be a truly stand up person. In communication, there is intent and there is impact. What was intended to be a parody song was received just that way by the masses (i.e. by people who were not the "target") but it impacted Joe in particular (and perhaps others on the moderation team, I don't know) in a really negative way. What I've seen in this thread (for the most part) is "You shouldn't feel that way". 

Perhaps you can make that argument of "It's just a joke, laugh and move on".  That is in fact what Joe did for over a decade, as someone asked why he waited so long (well he probably didn't laugh, but he didn't make it an issue).  If you poke fun at the structure of the moderation as that of a middle age white guy with a stick up his butt, that is probably fair game.  It is mind-boggling to me that some people don't seem to understand that you can't have a throwaway line that is anti-Semitic just because "Jews" rhymes with views and you think it is funny. Again, I fully believe that the many writers did not intend to make this accusation, but that is how it has been received and I think it is an entirely reasonable conclusion to arrive at if the song is heard by a new poster who doesn't have the benefit of context of decades worth of posts. I think that line is unfair and I understand why it hurts.  I don't believe any of us want anything ascribed to us that has no foundation in reality, I certainly have enough flaws that people could make jokes with at least a kernel of truth in them.

As to the other moderation efforts, all I can say is times change and people change. I think people started evaluating what was right and what was wrong, and not only looking at right and wrong from their viewpoint, but trying to expand it to understand other viewpoints.  At the start of the boards, PG meant clothed women, even bikinis if they weren't too revealing. R was reserved for nudity. People make jokes about "that is someone's daughter" but I think it is true. Even if fully clothed, is allowing the objectification of women something we want society to continue with? The comments weren't usually as tame as "That is a beautiful adult woman".  There wasn't technical analysis of "She has high cheekbones". Having a bunch of fat, bald, middle age guys say things like "I'd give her a go" as if she would even look your way in real life can easily be construed as creepy.  If you don't think so, go to friend's Facebook or Instagram page and start making those types of comments on his 20 year old daughter.

Lastly, to the laughing emoji. You are right, it is ridiculous for the moderation team to have to come to the decision to ban the use of it. Proudly, I have made either 0 or 1 post in the PSF (I think I started to post something and then backed out, but I may have posted it). I do not know who or which side abused it, I'm guessing it was multiple people and both sides. An argument could be made as others suggested to ban those posters who were abusing it. I'm guessing that was discussed, but that takes a lot of time from moderators, and it doesn't eliminate the misuse of the emoji by an alias or by others weaponizing it. I'm guessing at the end, the decision was made (probably with some on the mod team shaking their head that it came to this) to remove the emoji. In my uninformed opinion, you could probably state that misuse of the laughing emoji is a bannable offense so the rest of the community could use it as intended, but again I think the decision was probably made due to moderation resources.

I do love being a small part of this community and I hope it continues on.


I've been thinking of this distinction a lot since yesterday, and you are right.  Most people (including me) have been arguing intent, when that's not the only - or even the most - important factor.  Excellent post.


It is an excellent post.

I think there's something to be learned from all sides on this.

Even though it's pretty clear this was meant as a parody and a joke and it was written years and years ago, it's also pretty clear it has struck a nerve with Joe. And while most of us have been saying "just don't take it that way", he has and you can't really control how you feel.

That said, we have ALL said or done things that didn't come out as intended or were hurtful. And, when it's between two parties that have mutual understanding and respect, you talk it out, you explain your side, and then you move on. 

It's not as if those songs are being written and performed on a regular and repeated basis. And an error in judgment with that one line should be acknowledged as such, on both sides, forgiven, and then let it go. 

It's ok to apologize for something you did even if you didn't mean it to hurt someone. It's also ok to tell someone that hurt you that you understand they weren't coming from a place of malintent, that it's ok, and to show grace and forgiveness.

 
Hey all.

A little late now, but I will honestly have to go back and read what I posted.  I may or may not have had couple, few, or more in me at the time.  Thursday was a long ### day.  If I was coming in hot, my bad.   :lol:

I have 30+ notifications - quotes/tags/likes... I probably wont bother to go back and hit them all.

I do know I was ticked off to see @tonydead banned.  Definitely poor judgment there imo.  Only so many of us left, and allowing one side or the other to chase off those they disagree with.... might as well just make a separate PSF forum for each.

 
It is an excellent post.

I think there's something to be learned from all sides on this.

Even though it's pretty clear this was meant as a parody and a joke and it was written years and years ago, it's also pretty clear it has struck a nerve with Joe. And while most of us have been saying "just don't take it that way", he has and you can't really control how you feel.

That said, we have ALL said or done things that didn't come out as intended or were hurtful. And, when it's between two parties that have mutual understanding and respect, you talk it out, you explain your side, and then you move on. 

It's not as if those songs are being written and performed on a regular and repeated basis. And an error in judgment with that one line should be acknowledged as such, on both sides, forgiven, and then let it go. 

It's ok to apologize for something you did even if you didn't mean it to hurt someone. It's also ok to tell someone that hurt you that you understand they weren't coming from a place of malintent, that it's ok, and to show grace and forgiveness.


For sure, nobody needs to apologize. Certainly not to me. Folks feel how they feel. That is what it is.

It's not needed because nobody did anything to me, but even if they did, of course I forgive anyone. 

Grace and forgiveness are things I'm super thankful for. 

 
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To an extent, I'm an FBG (since yellow board days) because of the forums. I buy an annual FBG subscription almost as a donation. If the forums fall apart, I'll fade away and so will my subscription fee. I bet there are several like me. 

I've been wondering for quite a while why there's no laughing emoji. I've looked for it many times because there are some damn funny people here. To know it's been purposefully removed seems silly. Would love to know the backstory on this one.
This is me. I’ve even told joe this in the past. My brain is too small to take in all that content. 🤣. It’s amazing. I just don’t use it. 🤣. But I still buy a subscription. 

 
 I'll echo what others have said that you helped to create something great here.  I have several real life friends now because of it.  People I'd do anything for and know they'd do anything for me.  Nothing and no one is perfect, don't dwell on those things, learn from them.


Yep.  There are about a dozen people from this board that I talk to via text EVERY DAY.

I know we're a pain in the ###, Joe, but thank you for everything.

 
For better or worse, "Time marches on"...

My daughter in my avatar is a Junior in High School now... Obviously I've changed, as has the board.  I view this board as a family business that is set in it's ways and is unintentionally running it into the red.  The owner that started the business.. that put his/her blood sweat and tears into it... that worked weekends and holidays...  That owner doesn't want to let go.. thinks nobody else knows how to run it like they do.. and meanwhile it's dying, a little every day.

And this is more about my family business than Joe.. I just see similarities.. 

 
For better or worse, "Time marches on"...

My daughter in my avatar is a Junior in High School now... Obviously I've changed, as has the board.  I view this board as a family business that is set in it's ways and is unintentionally running it into the red.  The owner that started the business.. that put his/her blood sweat and tears into it... that worked weekends and holidays...  That owner doesn't want to let go.. thinks nobody else knows how to run it like they do.. and meanwhile it's dying, a little every day.

And this is more about my family business than Joe.. I just see similarities.. 


This is a biz that has a lot of value simply as an app.  It's not dying at all.  The forums are just a marketing expense that exists as a loss leader.

 
This is a biz that has a lot of value simply as an app.  It's not dying at all.  The forums are just a marketing expense that exists as a loss leader.


And are justified as such, IMO because it gives the site a legitimacy that competitors without forums lack.

 
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Hey all.

A little late now, but I will honestly have to go back and read what I posted.  I may or may not have had couple, few, or more in me at the time.  Thursday was a long ### day.  If I was coming in hot, my bad.   :lol:

I have 30+ notifications - quotes/tags/likes... I probably wont bother to go back and hit them all.

I do know I was ticked off to see @tonydead banned.  Definitely poor judgment there imo.  Only so many of us left, and allowing one side or the other to chase off those they disagree with.... might as well just make a separate PSF forum for each.
We've all done this (or at least I sure have). Making posts when you're coming from a bad place is not beneficial to anyone, and it's a great way to unintentionally start a fight and/or piss off the wrong people.

That said, you might be taking the tonydead ban a bit too hard. I get it, he was a prolific, relatively intelligent, occasionally really funny, conservative poster that never backed down from confronting posters "on the other side." But his go-to posting style was to constantly insult people that disagreed with him, directly and indirectly. It wasn't his beliefs or opinions that got him tossed, it was the way he went about communicating them.

I will also toss in my thanks to Joe, I've loved this place since the days of ol' yeller and even though I've gone long stretches without posting, I have always enjoyed the community.

 
We've all done this (or at least I sure have). Making posts when you're coming from a bad place is not beneficial to anyone, and it's a great way to unintentionally start a fight and/or piss off the wrong people.

That said, you might be taking the tonydead ban a bit too hard. I get it, he was a prolific, relatively intelligent, occasionally really funny, conservative poster that never backed down from confronting posters "on the other side." But his go-to posting style was to constantly insult people that disagreed with him, directly and indirectly. It wasn't his beliefs or opinions that got him tossed, it was the way he went about communicating them.

I will also toss in my thanks to Joe, I've loved this place since the days of ol' yeller and even though I've gone long stretches without posting, I have always enjoyed the community.
The bolded I don’t think would get him tossed as certain posters come to mind that troll every time they are back from their slaps on the wrist that do nothing but insult the few here with opposing views. We know you aren’t a Tony fan as he would call you out at times but this assessment just isn’t accurate I’d have to say, @matuski isn’t off base about his ban. Is what it is at this point though.
 

If he doesn’t get a shoutout in the updated PC parody when it comes out it will be a disservice to ol Tony.  :suds:
 

 
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this thread is really irritating and i think a lot of guys i used to think pretty highly of have shown a whole lot of their a$$es in here
It's a good thing we all have the infallible SWC to act as the ultimate judge of our characters. I was getting worried.

 
As far as SWC goes, those that play the fool are rarely the actual fools.  And you can take that to your bank's night suppository.

 
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I've suffered alcohol induced brain damage. Bear with me for the dumb question here.   So is tonydead a matsuki alias? 

 
eoMMan said:
True, but the end result is that nothing is allowed. I can’t post about a movie and say  “whoa, that actress is hot!”.
Exactly.  "How Hot?" and "Who's Hottest?" posts banned?  Give me a break.  That was some of the best entertainment in here.

 
culdeus said:
I've suffered alcohol induced brain damage. Bear with me for the dumb question here.   So is tonydead a matsuki alias? 


No. I am certainly not offended you might think it.

The matsuki thing takes me back like 20 years when typing something like that wouldn't get you reported.

We'd actually have to have the conversation and laugh or rage about it.

 
SWC said:
this thread is really irritating and i think a lot of guys i used to think pretty highly of have shown a whole lot of their a$$es in here


I don't think you ever thought highly of me, I'm glad you finally got some ### out of this relationship though.

 
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Herb said:
We've all done this (or at least I sure have). Making posts when you're coming from a bad place is not beneficial to anyone, and it's a great way to unintentionally start a fight and/or piss off the wrong people.

That said, you might be taking the tonydead ban a bit too hard. I get it, he was a prolific, relatively intelligent, occasionally really funny, conservative poster that never backed down from confronting posters "on the other side." But his go-to posting style was to constantly insult people that disagreed with him, directly and indirectly. It wasn't his beliefs or opinions that got him tossed, it was the way he went about communicating them.

I will also toss in my thanks to Joe, I've loved this place since the days of ol' yeller and even though I've gone long stretches without posting, I have always enjoyed the community.


I still enjoy the community, but it is a crippled version of its former self.  I must have missed the insults.... or I would at the very least argue he was only giving as good as he got it.

My post wasn't necessarily about @Joe Bryant and whoever else admins this place (honestly I have never really kept up with that).  Blame is worthless.  They are as much a victim of how the world is these days as anything.

My entirely speculative bet is that they probably get as many reported posts now as they did when there were 10 times as many posters.

The Wussification of America.

And I've said this for almost 20 years now and nobody has ever taken me up on it.... If you are in San Antonio, hit me up I'll buy a couple rounds.  ESPECIALLY if you don't like me here.  $20 says we leave the spot friends.

 
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