timdraft #4: Movie Category Draft (2 Viewers)

[John Maddens Lunchbox]

I should have the England rankings posted in the next 36 hours.

2 more movies to watch (again)

 

[Val Rannous]

OK! Outer Space Rankings are done, and write-ups are finished!

I'll start posting as soon as Andy gets me that last film he's ranking for me.

 

[Val Rannous]

OK, time to raise the shields and arm the photon torpedoes – it’s...

Outer Space Movie Rankings Part I

First off, let me congratulate everyone on selecting such a stellar list of contenders. There were very few films on this list I don’t like – even most of the “lower quality” films I consider to be good guilty pleasures. There were a few dogs, but that’s to be expected on any list. On with the show!

1 point – Solaris. This is one of the few films I hadn’t seen going into this ranking. Outer space wasn’t a problem here, it’s just a really, really bad film. This film is completely missing setting explanations, plot explanations, character motivations, conclusion understandings - nothing is ever explained. And I mean nothing. Solaris is (I think) some sorta energy field, possibly around Earth. Maybe. I’m deducing from the pretty graphics out the spaceship windows. What it is, where it came from, where it is in relationship to Earth, when it arrived, what it does – screw you, you ain’t meant to know. We don’t even get a courtesy explanation voiceover or scrolling text saying it’s something not understood. It always rains now on earth, though – why, I don’t know, or why it matters, or even if agriculture is possible any more – not important, apparently. Weird stuff happens to people in orbit studying Solaris – some sorta wish fulfillment dream manifestations and people going nuts. Maybe. Everyone sees somebody who shouldn’t be there after they dream about them – our “hero” sees his dead wife. He also spaces the first manifestation of his dead wife – why? Screw you, no explanations. More weirdness, some technobabble, some confusion, somebody leaves because the orbit is decaying, stuff. The only explanation I can give is this entire thing is a wet-dream film attempt by a director who has serious man wood for Stanley Kubrick without understanding Stanley Kubrick. Either that, or you can go with the Lewis Carroll explanation: “‘Twas brillig, and the slithy toves did gyre and gamble in the wabe: all mimsy were the borogoves, and the mome raths outgrabe…”

2 points – Sunshine. I hadn’t seen this one either. Seemed spacey enough, but it still blew. Geez, where to start? If we ignore the bad science (a really big bomb to restart the sun?), design issues (All the O2 storage on a ship that big in one spot? Sprinklers on a space ship for fire suppression? Only one airlock?!?), cinematography “decisions” (the invention of the next level of the shaky cam, dubbed by me while watching as the “unfocusing vibracam”), bad script writing (The entire third act suddenly switches movie types into a Friday the 13th slasher flick), etc... If we ignore all of that, we still have a major problem that blows away my suspension of disbelief – we have a mission (actually 2 missions) to be the last hope for the survival of humanity, our chance to step up and do great deeds, and this pack of neurotic losers is the best and brightest we can send? My god, they don’t even have the “Mediocre Stuff”!

3 points – Outland. One of two “Sci-Fi Westerns” on the list, and the problem here is that it’s WAY more Western than Sci-Fi. The other one (Serenity) is an Outer Space film with frontier themes – Outland is a flat out rip of High Noon that just happens to be set on a planet other than this one. You get no real “spacey” feeling here, it’s all on one location, no space travel involved. If you look past the tech items, the film could have just as easily been set in Durango, Colorado or Mesa, Arizona instead of on Io. In fact, outside of variety there’s no reason for this to be set where it is – the plot in no way requires it. I honestly kept expecting Gabby Hayes to wander through a scene leading a burro.

4 points – Starship Troopers. Just thinking about this film makes me angry. Robert Heinlein is my favorite all-time author, but it sure doesn’t show through here. I had such hope when I heard this one was being made, and was there opening night with high expectations. What I ended up seeing made me want to throw something at the screen and find Paul Verhoeven so I could kick him in the nutsack. Over the top acting, thin script bearing no relation to the book, and screwed up politics. Heinlein wrote the book as a “we should support our soldiers, especially the poor dumb infantry, past, present, and future”, so we get a view of interstellar war from the viewpoint of a grunt who goes through training, see action, and moves up the ranks. The problem comes in when Heinlein proposes that the right to vote in government might be better if it was limited to people willing to volunteer their time to the nation instead of just any warm body – not necessarily military, but when you serve the nation in some fashion you get better understanding of what is necessary for maintaining our freedoms. Verhoeven somehow twists this into a f###ed up fascist state where the military rules with an iron fist, with propaganda broadcasts Himmler would be proud of. Politics aside, the few space scenes are decent – there’s a great scene of planetary defenses shooting at ships in orbit. Other military aspects are not so good, however – apparently in the future soldiers stupidly stand in clumps and try to blast away with automatic weapons at enemies 3-4 feet away. Using cover? Ducking? Ranged fire? Support equipment? Grenades? Air cover? Modern tactics? Hell, Napoleonic tactics? Not in this universe, bucko. Stand, shoot, get killed. The Marines from Aliens point and sneer at what’s on display here.

5 points – The Last Starfighter. Yes, I’ve seen a film ranked this low multiple times. I guess sometimes even a bad space flick is better that anything else on Saturday afternoon TV. It has its good points – the plot idea is interesting, the girlfriend is cute, the interactions with the little brother are funny, and Robert Preston (in his last role) is always a winner. But, we have a few issues that drop it down here. It’s hokey, the baddie is unconvincing, there’s a real scale issue (there’s a barrier of defense emitters, each one smallish ship sized, spaced conservatively about a kilometer apart, in a globe around THE ENTIRE POPULATED PART OF THE GALAXY!?!?), and the special effects are really dated (they tried to make it look like an 80’s video game, which hasn’t aged well). But the real problem I have with the movie is an overwhelming desire to choke the freaking life out of that lizard navigator – the leading candidate for the award “Most Annoying Sci-Fi Character before the advent of Jar-Jar Binks”

 

[Val Rannous]

Outer Space Movie Rankings Part II

6 points – The Day the Earth Stood Still. It hurts to rank this movie this low, it’s a 50s classic. But it’s probably the least “spacy” film selected, and the list is not best Sci-Fi film, it’s best Outer Space film. A visitor from “elsewhere” visits Washington DC, meets interesting people, and throws out some pretty harsh threats. Substitute an airline flight from Moscow for a flying saucer and a Russian Diplomat for an entirely human looking alien and you have the exact same film. Gort is way cool, and “Klaatu Barata Nikto” is one of the most famous lines in a made up language ever, but this film is just too grounded to score more points on an outer space film list.

7 points – Spaceballs. Silly, silly Star Wars satire. I like a good satire, but this one seems to be to be just way too much of a so-so thing. Mel Brooks pushed the limit here, and everything seems to be just that nudge too far for me, spiraling out of control from potentially funny into the annoying and overblown range, like a really bad SNL skit (although I like Ludicrous Speed – it’s like the ship goes to 11). No need to rehash science or logic problems here, it’s supposed to be silly and not make sense. Not Mel’s best work – When I think of Mel and Space, I always crack up over Jews in Space, with the great Star of David cruisers from History of the World Part I. We’ll get to a much funnier and better film later in the list.

8 points – Pitch Black. Another of the films I hadn’t seen going in to this list (although I had already seen the sequel, The Chronicles of Riddick). Riddick is a great character, and watching Vin Diesel play him is the entire reason to see this flick – one of the better antiheroes out there. Once again, spacyness is limited here – we crash land on a desert planet at the start of the film and spend the rest of the time there. However, the planet is sufficiently weird that I’m cutting this one some slack. Instead, the problems here are a trinary solar system that just doesn’t work in real life (larger mass items like stars do NOT orbit smaller planetary bodies, and there’s flat out no way to get that month long eclipse the story needs), ship design again (no emergency supplies or medical kits anywhere on that ship?), and a completely impossible planetary ecology (the aliens are all carnivores that come out at night to eat – what? There’s nothing on the planet to feed them – no plants, no herbivores, nada – no cycle of life to keep anything fed, much less however ungodly many feeders are lurking here.) Also I was annoyed by the Jackpot Syndrome here – bad things happen here only once every 22 years, and the crash landing happens within 24-ish hours of that occurrence? Dude, bad timing…

9 points – Serenity. (Guest Reviewer – Andy Dufresne) I know that Serenity/Firefly has a cult following but I personally don't get it. I've tried three times to get through the series but just can't do it. I don't think it's very accessible to people who aren't into the series and doesn't stand on its own. It always felt a little like a higher class Battle Beyond the Stars to me. On the very plus side it has Gina Torres, Jewel Staite, and Morena Baccarin ( ) and a wryly entertaining Nathan Fillion. (/Guest Reviewer)

(Oh my god, somebody else remembers Battle Beyond John Boy!)

10 points – The Fifth Element. I’ll admit I kinda like this film, in a “it’s schlock but in a groovy sorta way”, but in reality it’s just an average film. A space baddie wanders to Earth (of course) every couple of thousand years and must be stopped every time or life in the universe ends? Ooooookay, so plot is not this film’s strong suit. Plus we have a return of the impossible defense barrier generators from The Last Starfighter – I guess stupid and impossible ideas never die. What the movie does have going for it is style and visuals – it’s gorgeous at times, Bruce and Milla are both cool badasses, and there’s a decent level of fun and humor. Just don’t try to overthink it.

 

[Val Rannous]

Outer Space Movie Rankings Part III

11 points – Contact. One might wonder about the “Spaciness” quotient here, but I don’t think that’s a problem. The first 2/3rds of the movie are a mystery story concerning communications with something “out there”, so even if we’re not actually there we’re constantly trying to figure it out. It’s cool, it’s intriguing, and the mystery and solutions are well presented. We also get some interesting discussion on the interactions with science and religion, and how that interaction would be affected by life elsewhere. So, with all that going for it, what’s Contact doing slumming down here in the bottom half? All the great buildup and coolness lead to an ending that is a massive letdown and disappointment. The mystery has led to a transport device that when used takes our heroine to a meeting with her dead dad (presumably played in this case by a masquerading alien) on a metaphoric beach out of her past so he can give her a pat on the head for being a smart girl? That’s it? And nobody back home believes she did even that much, and give her a “Oh well, we tried”. So, our point here was what – aliens send us an interstellar message to get us to spend a vast amount of money to build 2 transport devices to basically give humanity the Punk’d treatment?

12 points – Total Recall. Arnold kicks some butt – like that’s never happened in a film before. Great action flick here involving a trip to Mars and a discovered alien artifact – maybe. And that maybe is the problem – is it live or is it Memorex? Out plot is about memory implants of an espionage agent on a trip to Mars that get spoiled because they’re implanting the memories in an espionage agent on a trip to Mars – maybe. I realize that the ambiguity here is intentional – apparently they wanted to annoy me and never clarify what was happening and what was implanted. Well, fine, that annoyance and a major problem with the climax of the film keep me from rating it higher. (You can raise the air pressure of the entire planet how fast? Really?!?) Don’t get me wrong, the film is a great ride, it just doesn’t get anywhere useful.

13 points – Avatar. I was torn on this one – I think it’s a so-so film, but apparently crazed fans throwing gobs and gobs of money at it disagree with me. It takes place on another planet, but we get no space travel (fine, fine, it’s a very alien and cool planet, I’ll cut slack here). The planet is occupied by Native Americans… er, giant blue aliens living in harmony with nature, and we want their Unobtanium. (Really? All the stupid made up element names taken? Or were your script writers too busy anticipating their royalty checks?) Greedy military capitalist humans bad, Na’vi treehuggers good, got it, quit using that sledgehammer. Our hero is a human using a created Na’vi avatar body to scout the lay of the land, and gets caught up in the beauty and wonder of Comanche life… er, Na’vi life and the wonders of Pandora. The hot Na’vi chick doesn’t hurt at all, either. He changes sides as he thinks the way of life and Na’vi tail is worth saving, and that the people in charge of the humans are complete whackadoos. Aside from the fact that the script is somewhat thin and predictable (and the bad guys are cardboard cutouts), the scenery is incredible, the special affects are good, and the action is kick ###. I had a decent time watching this, but it’s NOT all that and a bag of chips like the ravening hordes seem to think.

14 points – Silent Running. Ok, now it gets rough – everything from this point forward is quality, with some rough decisions in ranking to be made. I remember seeing Silent Running as a teenager, and thinking that it was one of the most realistic space films I had seen. 30 years later, it’s still pretty damn realistic (although now I do wonder about little things like artificial gravity – but it’s not that important). What we get here is an interesting character study of a man pushed too far, and what he’ll do to protect what he loves. Bruce Dern is very believable, and the robot sidekicks Hewey, Dewey, and Louie and perfect (true story – they used multiple amputees to fit into those robot suits!). There is a certain level of hippy-dippy eco-freakiness here, but overall it’s a believable plot. Probably my only negative here is the story does seem to drag at times, but that is understandable considering we’re talking about a man basically alone in the outer solar system with nobody to talk to but robots who don’t talk back.

15 points – A Trip to the Moon. Now we’re talking seriously old school. This is the first famous Sci-Fi film, showing a literal moon shot and the results. Incredibly fanciful, nothing realistic here, but come on, it’s 1902! George Melies creates a cannon to shoot a capsule of scientists to the moon, including the famous shot of the capsule hitting the Old Man in the Moon in the eye. Our (spacesuit-less) scientists get out of the capsule, take a nap to rest from the journey (complete with dream gods and goddesses), and then meet Selenites (moon people!), who are aggressive, but explode on hard contact. After blowing up a bunch of Selenites, including their leader, our scientists get back in their capsule and push it off the edge of the moon so it can fall back to Earth. On splashdown, they are rescued by a ship and towed to shore – it’s amazing that they got some ideas right like splashdown at a time before many people had even seen an automobile! This movie gets major props for inventiveness, special effects, and being a landmark in filmmaking. However, because it’s SO early in filmmaking, it’s very primitive as far as storytelling and editing (more linked scenes than an ongoing narrative) – the first film with modern style storytelling and editing didn’t appear until the Great Train Robbery a year later. Also, the story is sorta drug hallucination stuff – maybe the earliest WTF film. Still worth seeing for the historical value alone.

 

[Val Rannous]

Outer Space Movie Rankings Part IV

16 points – Close Encounters of the Third Kind. Told you this was getting harder. Spielberg’s epic movie of our first official meeting with somebody from “out there” is one of the main films (along with Star Wars and Superman) that brought back Sci-Fi as a legitimate, profitable movie type in the 70s. This is the last film on the list that will get a slight hit against it for lack of spaciness – it’s pretty much set on earth, and we don’t meet the aliens until the last 25 minutes of the film. The movie builds slowly, and seems to me somewhat episodic and choppy until that last 25 minutes. But what a 25 minutes they are – the flyovers, the appearance of the Mothership, the music conversation (especially when the Mothership first answers!), the opening of the Mothership, the return of the missing people, the appearance of the aliens – all way cool.

17 points – Forbidden Planet. After A Trip to the Moon, this one seems almost modern. There was a lot of schlocky 50s Sci-Fi films out there, this was an attempt to do one as a proper non-schlock film with a big budget by MGM. Beautiful, absolutely gorgeous designs and special effects – you can see the money they put into this one right there on the screen. Screenplay’s not bad either, as they ripped from the best – this is basically Shakespeare’s The Tempest with flying saucers. It earns its space ranking, too – it’s the first film portraying humans with a starship of their own construction, and it’s the first film to take place completely outside our solar system. Gene Roddenberry points this movie out as highly influential on Star Trek, and most of the modern outer space films can point to some ancestry here. Plus Robby is the coolest robot in movies up to the release of Star Wars. Critically and publically it only did OK, but Sci-Fi fans have a warm place in their hearts for this one.

18 points – 2001: A Space Odyssey. If we have any arguments, it will be for this ranking. This film (and every film that follows it) is a perfect examples of a quality Space film, and this one is a critical and financial success. So why isn’t it top 5 material? Well, 2 reasons. Number one is that there are some great films still to come. Number two is that I have problems with the story here. There are many things that go unexplained (intentionally!) that make it a more confusing film than some of the other greats – things like the world’s biggest 1x4x9 Maguffin, and what the heck happens to Hal? (Yes, I’ve seen 2010, I know the answer to that – now. This film was not at the time intended to ever have a sequel.) Also, this is another one of those great films – up to a point. Much like Contact, this ending is pointless, incomprehensible, weirdness for weirdness sake. The last 20 minutes of the film is without dialog, showing pretty colored lights instead, leading to… wait, what? A badly decorated bedroom? Star Babies? Wha??? As I’ve already mentioned on this list, if you can’t bother to explain yourself better than that and come up with an actual ending to your movie, you’re gonna lose points here. Aside from that, it’s lovely, groundbreaking, and a special film.

19 points – Galaxy Quest. A lovely parody and rip on Star Trek and Trekkies in general, this film holds its own as a quality outer space film. The story here is what happens when aliens mistake TV actors from a Sci-Fi show for the real thing? Hilarity! If you dig through the pokes and jabs at Star Trek, we still have great action, quality space combat, and a good overall story. But the pokes and jabs are awesome! The Captain losing his shirt (fan appeal!) but keeps getting all the credit, the redshirt whining about dying at every turn, the female bridge crewperson getting more and more “unzipped” as time goes by (brilliantly played by Sigourney Weaver), the fans who want to believe it’s all real and obsess over it – it’s all perfect. The only real catch for this one is it didn’t get the love from the critics and box office everything else up in this point range did. I love it, it’s well worth seeing.

20 points – Wall-E. (My pick) Aww. Is there a cuter set of protagonists on this list than Wall-E and EVE? Even though this is an animated film, everything is there for a great Outer Space film – space travel, cool technologies, fantastic special effects, great story – this film has it all. It’s also a critique on humanity’s affect on the Earth and how consumerism can get carried to far. This film actually goes into some surprisingly accurate details, like the affects of low gravity on humans over long time periods. Only problem here is that it may be too cutesy for the hard core Sci-Fi fan, but bah on them, it’s a great flick.

 

[Val Rannous]

Outer Space Movie Rankings Part V

21 points and 22 points – The Right Stuff and Apollo 13. Combined review here, as these two films are very close in spirit – The Right Stuff being the story of the Mercury 7 Astronauts and the test pilots of the late 40’s and 50’s (up to the Gemini program), and Apollo 13 the story of the incredible “successful failure” of that one mission in 1970. NASA geeks glory in the realistic details here, both of these films attempt to show what it was really like. They are not Sci-Fi, it’s real Science – actual freefall on film, rockets blasting, planes and pilots shooting for the outside of the envelope – it’s stirring, dramatic, and heartfelt. Yes, you already know what’s going to happen going in – doesn’t matter, I find myself gripping the arms of my chair tensed up at every launch just like it was the real thing. Chuck Yeager, Alan Sheppard, John Glenn, Jim Lovell – these were among my heroes when I was growing up (along with Kirk and Spock) – I wanted so very much to join them in the conquest of space (the fact that I have some of the worst eyes in history meant THAT would never happen), and these films bring back that wonder and hope that we really can do the impossible and go where no man has gone before IN REAL LIFE!!! Absolutely love both films. Apollo 13 gets the extra point on the list because while they were both critically acclaimed, The Right Stuff was pretty average at the box office.

23 points – Aliens. And for our top 3 spots, we have – three sequels? Who would have thought? First up we have the 4th film on the list starring Sigourney Weaver, out top Outer Space star. Aliens is awesome, gritty, realistic spectacular stuff – where Alien was a horror film set in space, this is kick butt outer space action from the word go. The Marines here are completely believable, everything looks great, the plot points and character motivations work (even the slime company man “villain” is understandable). No negatives here, it’s just not gonna catch the top two.

24 points – Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back. What else needs to be said, it’s an all time classic. This is what the rest of the series should have been, before we descended into Ewoks and Jar-Jar land – dark, intense, great characterizations, beautiful, what more could you want. As to why it’s not #1, I had a choice between the best Star Trek flick, or (in my opinion) the second best Star Wars flick. Because While Empire is great, the original Star Wars is mythic and the stuff legends are made of (and would have gotten #1).

25 points – Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. After the stink fest that was Star Trek, the Motion Sickness (as we’ve always called it), we didn’t have high hopes for Khan. Boy, were we wrong, as this set into motion the “every other Star Trek film is quality” trope. As much as we all love Darth, here is the best bad guy in space – Ricardo Montalban is absolutely a gem in his repeat of Khan from the original series. We have possibly one of the best space battle scenes ever, we see why Kirk is who he is (“I don’t believe in the no-win scenario”), we have the heroic death scene – nothing is missing here. I’ve always loved it, and always will.

 

[Val Rannous]

Outer Space Movie Final Rankings

25 points – Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan.

24 points – Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back.

23 points – Aliens.

22 points – Apollo 13.

21 points – The Right Stuff.

20 points – Wall-E.

19 points – Galaxy Quest.

18 points – 2001: A Space Odyssey.

17 points – Forbidden Planet.

16 points – Close Encounters of the Third Kind.

15 points – A Trip to the Moon.

14 points – Silent Running.

13 points – Avatar.

12 points – Total Recall.

11 points – Contact.

10 points – The Fifth Element.

9 points – Serenity.

8 points – Pitch Black.

7 points – Spaceballs.

6 points – The Day the Earth Stood Still.

5 points – The Last Starfighter.

4 points – Starship Troopers.

3 points – Outland.

2 points – Sunshine.

1 point – Solaris.

 

[rikishiboy]

no prob with the Star Wars ranking....IV is epic, I just slightly prefer V.

The last Starfighter was an 80's film (which I loved), so don't understand the dated comments.

Wall-E was really good, but I don't think it should of been ranked so high, same with Galaxy Quest.

I do understand everyone views things differently...these are just my opinions.

 

[Mrs. Rannous]

The Last Starfighter was pretty much dated ten minutes after it came out. I still like watching it, but it just isn't as timeless as a good film should be.

 

[KarmaPolice]

Don't agree with a lot of the list, which I expected to a point. However, any world where wall-e and galaxy quest are ranked over 2001 is not one that I am happy to be a part of.

 

[Andy Dufresne]

9 points – Serenity. (Guest Reviewer – Andy Dufresne) I know that Serenity/Firefly has a cult following but I personally don't get it. I've tried three times to get through the series but just can't do it. I don't think it's very accessible to people who aren't into the series and doesn't stand on its own. It always felt a little like a higher class Battle Beyond the Stars to me. On the very plus side it has Gina Torres, Jewel Staite, and Morena Baccarin ( ) and a wryly entertaining Nathan Fillion. (/Guest Reviewer)

(Oh my god, somebody else remembers Battle Beyond John Boy!)

I actually have the soundtrack. It's James Horner's earliest and you can hear a ton of the technique that he stole from himself in most of his later works. Fortunately it's all good.

I will not tolerate any disparaging remarks on The Last Starfighter.

 

[AcerFC]

Hey, I never gave my criteria - has everyone already taken their space pictures?

40% - Quality of picture

30% - Relevance to category

30% - Popularity (both critical and box office)

Relevance in this category means outer space has to be involved somehow - the movie doesn't necessarily have to take place entirely in space - characters or things being there qualify it, but I will say being there will give it a boost over talking about it or meeting somebody from it. Still, if it's a crappy movie set entirely in space it's still a crappy movie. If it requires MST3K to make it watchable, it's not gonna score high - I'm looking at you, Trumpy.

Since outer space is a location that says nothing about the style of movie, I can say that anything goes here - drama, space opera, horror, comedy, thriller - whatever goes, goes.

6 points – The Day the Earth Stood Still. It hurts to rank this movie this low, it’s a 50s classic. But it’s probably the least “spacy” film selected, and the list is not best Sci-Fi film, it’s best Outer Space film. A visitor from “elsewhere” visits Washington DC, meets interesting people, and throws out some pretty harsh threats. Substitute an airline flight from Moscow for a flying saucer and a Russian Diplomat for an entirely human looking alien and you have the exact same film. Gort is way cool, and “Klaatu Barata Nikto” is one of the most famous lines in a made up language ever, but this film is just too grounded to score more points on an outer space film list.

 

[Tremendous Upside]

Wall-E is possibly the most overrated movie ever

 

[Andy Dufresne]

Wall-E is possibly the most overrated movie ever

Definitely the most overrated Pixar.

The first half is brilliant. The second half, with the humans, is very not good.

 

[KarmaPolice]

Wall-E is possibly the most overrated movie ever

I am not sure it is a top 6 pixar movie, let alone top space movie.

 

[KarmaPolice]

I am not going to go mad Sweeney in here, but do think that the rankings feel a little too based on liking the movie and/or understanding the movie. I am sure more went into it than that, but the writeups seemed very focused on that.

Maybe I just get my artsy movie snob feathers ruffled when people claim a movie is weird just to be weird.

 

[jwb]

I punted this category till late and took one of my favorite films in Solaris.

Did you get a non-subtitled version or something? Solaris is a planet with a space station orbiting it that Kris is sent to, because weird things are happening there (apparently, the planet is a living thing which can read minds, and resurrects deceased loved ones - at least in the minds of the people in the station.)

It's widely considered one of the greatest films of all time. I know it's not a popcorn movie, but it's definitely far better than the 1 you gave it (I'm not complaining, mind you. I accept my 1. I just think you did yourself an injustice and didn't really give it a shot.) Not to get all film-snobby on you, but I'm pretty sure you watched a dubbed/non-subtitled version (and therefore didn't get the story, which truthfully, isn't hard to understand, although, much like 2001, the ending is left open toyour own interpretation.) Here's Ebert's Great Movies review (scroll down to paragraph 6 to where he starts talking about the film itself).

 

[Andy Dufresne]

I punted this category till late and took one of my favorite films in Solaris.

Did you get a non-subtitled version or something? Solaris is a planet with a space station orbiting it that Kris is sent to, because weird things are happening there (apparently, the planet is a living thing which can read minds, and resurrects deceased loved ones - at least in the minds of the people in the station.)

It's widely considered one of the greatest films of all time. I know it's not a popcorn movie, but it's definitely far better than the 1 you gave it (I'm not complaining, mind you. I accept my 1. I just think you did yourself an injustice and didn't really give it a shot.) Not to get all film-snobby on you, but I'm pretty sure you watched a dubbed/non-subtitled version (and therefore didn't get the story, which truthfully, isn't hard to understand, although, much like 2001, the ending is left open toyour own interpretation.) Here's Ebert's Great Movies review (scroll down to paragraph 6 to where he starts talking about the film itself).

Well now hang on a second...

 

[jwb]

I punted this category till late and took one of my favorite films in Solaris.

Did you get a non-subtitled version or something? Solaris is a planet with a space station orbiting it that Kris is sent to, because weird things are happening there (apparently, the planet is a living thing which can read minds, and resurrects deceased loved ones - at least in the minds of the people in the station.)

It's widely considered one of the greatest films of all time. I know it's not a popcorn movie, but it's definitely far better than the 1 you gave it (I'm not complaining, mind you. I accept my 1. I just think you did yourself an injustice and didn't really give it a shot.) Not to get all film-snobby on you, but I'm pretty sure you watched a dubbed/non-subtitled version (and therefore didn't get the story, which truthfully, isn't hard to understand, although, much like 2001, the ending is left open toyour own interpretation.) Here's Ebert's Great Movies review (scroll down to paragraph 6 to where he starts talking about the film itself).

Well now hang on a second...

*shrug* - but it is (but, of course, any greatest movies list is going to be 100 films deep). It's about on a par with 2001. And certainly better than Galaxy Quest.

Hey, last movie draft, you admitted to not even watching it before you gave it a low score.

Sigh... Solaris gets no love in the FFA. Next time, I should just draft the Clooney version.

 

[joffer]

Galaxy Quest only about 16 spots too high

 

[Andy Dufresne]

I punted this category till late and took one of my favorite films in Solaris.

Did you get a non-subtitled version or something? Solaris is a planet with a space station orbiting it that Kris is sent to, because weird things are happening there (apparently, the planet is a living thing which can read minds, and resurrects deceased loved ones - at least in the minds of the people in the station.)

It's widely considered one of the greatest films of all time. I know it's not a popcorn movie, but it's definitely far better than the 1 you gave it (I'm not complaining, mind you. I accept my 1. I just think you did yourself an injustice and didn't really give it a shot.) Not to get all film-snobby on you, but I'm pretty sure you watched a dubbed/non-subtitled version (and therefore didn't get the story, which truthfully, isn't hard to understand, although, much like 2001, the ending is left open toyour own interpretation.) Here's Ebert's Great Movies review (scroll down to paragraph 6 to where he starts talking about the film itself).

Well now hang on a second...

*shrug* - but it is (but, of course, any greatest movies list is going to be 100 films deep). It's about on a par with 2001. And certainly better than Galaxy Quest.

Hey, last movie draft, you admitted to not even watching it before you gave it a low score.

Sigh... Solaris gets no love in the FFA. Next time, I should just draft the Clooney version.

I'll agree that it should have scored much higher and Galaxy Quest much lower.

Welcome to the club I started after the ranking of my Monty Python classroom scene.

However, saying it's on par with 2001 doesn't score many points with me either. That movie really is a terrible bore.

 

[timschochet]

I haven't seen Solaris, but the problem with calling it one of the greatest sci fi films ever is that this label could apply to any movie drafted. After all there are only 25 films.

In any case, great job, Val. You were thoughtful, tried to be consistent, and backed up your rankings with detailed explanations. That's all I can ask for.

 

[Dr. Octopus]

Outer Space Movie Final Rankings 25 points – Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. 24 points – Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back. 23 points – Aliens. 22 points – Apollo 13. 21 points – The Right Stuff.20 points – Wall-E. 19 points – Galaxy Quest. 18 points – 2001: A Space Odyssey. 17 points – Forbidden Planet. 16 points – Close Encounters of the Third Kind. 15 points – A Trip to the Moon. 14 points – Silent Running. 13 points – Avatar. 12 points – Total Recall. 11 points – Contact. 10 points – The Fifth Element. 9 points – Serenity.8 points – Pitch Black. 7 points – Spaceballs. 6 points – The Day the Earth Stood Still. 5 points – The Last Starfighter. 4 points – Starship Troopers. 3 points – Outland. 2 points – Sunshine. 1 point – Solaris.

Galaxy Quest and Wall-E?

 

[krista4]

Outer Space Movie Final Rankings 25 points – Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. 24 points – Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back. 23 points – Aliens. 22 points – Apollo 13. 21 points – The Right Stuff.20 points – Wall-E. 19 points – Galaxy Quest. 18 points – 2001: A Space Odyssey. 17 points – Forbidden Planet. 16 points – Close Encounters of the Third Kind. 15 points – A Trip to the Moon. 14 points – Silent Running. 13 points – Avatar. 12 points – Total Recall. 11 points – Contact. 10 points – The Fifth Element. 9 points – Serenity.8 points – Pitch Black. 7 points – Spaceballs. 6 points – The Day the Earth Stood Still. 5 points – The Last Starfighter. 4 points – Starship Troopers. 3 points – Outland. 2 points – Sunshine. 1 point – Solaris.

Galaxy Quest and Wall-E?

+1

 

[Dr. Octopus]

Wall-E is possibly the most overrated movie ever

Definitely the most overrated Pixar.The first half is brilliant. The second half, with the humans, is very not good.

Agree, I love the first half. The second half is horrible, even by kids movie standards.

 

[Dr. Octopus]

Outer Space Movie Final Rankings 25 points – Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan. 24 points – Star Wars V: The Empire Strikes Back. 23 points – Aliens. 22 points – Apollo 13. 21 points – The Right Stuff.20 points – Wall-E. 19 points – Galaxy Quest. 18 points – 2001: A Space Odyssey. 17 points – Forbidden Planet. 16 points – Close Encounters of the Third Kind. 15 points – A Trip to the Moon. 14 points – Silent Running. 13 points – Avatar. 12 points – Total Recall. 11 points – Contact. 10 points – The Fifth Element. 9 points – Serenity.8 points – Pitch Black. 7 points – Spaceballs. 6 points – The Day the Earth Stood Still. 5 points – The Last Starfighter. 4 points – Starship Troopers. 3 points – Outland. 2 points – Sunshine. 1 point – Solaris.

Galaxy Quest and Wall-E?

+1

I'm sure even Tim Allen is embarrassed to have been in that movie and he made like 8 of those Santa Clause movies.

 

[tish155]

I am so sorry to do this so late in the draft, but with I have to throw back Dance scene to a judge. I thought i would have time to do it, but I really dont right now. Great picks really and I def have my own favorites, so good luck to whoever takes it.

dance scene1. Dirty Dancing2. Saturday Night Fever3. Beauty and the Beast4. Fred Astaire in Royal Wedding5. Risky Business6. "You're the One That I Want" (Grease)7. Napoleon Dynamite8. Ferris performs Twist and Shout9. penguin dance from Mary Poppins10. Scent of A Woman11. To Sir With Love12. Footloose13. "Time Warp" from Rocky Horror Picture Show14. Big15. "Ease on Down the Road" from The Wiz16. Stormy Weather17. Robin Hood: Men In Tights18. Seven Brides for Seven Brothers19. The King and I20. Moulin Rouge21. White Nights22. Swing Time23. Strictly Ballroom24. Chicago25. Beetlejuice

 

[timschochet]

Sigh. I'll do it unless someone volunteers.

 

[krista4]

Sigh. I'll do it unless someone volunteers.

Mrs. R previously expressed an interest. You might wish to check in with her.

 

[Val Rannous]

OK, a couple of notes on the responses:

1. The Day the Earth Stood Still - I used my criteria to get tiers of films, and then ranked within the tier. Once the writeups were done I nudged a few films up or down a notch based on how I felt about them after writing the review. Rather than use a number system this time, I used a demerit system, notching films -1 for being a little off and -2 for being a lot off, etc., then inside the category paid more focus to the overall quality of the movie. TDtESS was a good, but not great film (-1), got high critical reviews but average box office (-1), and was the only film selected that got a -2 for outer space qualifications, for a total of -4, which puts it in the tier with The Last Starfighter and Starship Troopers. In that tier it was easily the best film and got the highest rating.

2. The Last Starfighter - I stand by the dated comment. Films made in the previous decade to TLS still look like quality, but they were all minature photography based. TLS has the misfortune of being leading edge on computer generated graphics, but before computer graphics were any good. Hence everything looks slow and fake.

3. Galaxy Quest and Wall-E - just as at the Academy Awards, comedy films always seem to get knocked when compared against more serious fare. I think both of these comedys are quality films, and that comedys are worth ranking highly on lists like these if they have that quality. I'll stand by the Galaxy Quest ranking - just because it's aim is to be a funny outer space film doesn't mean it's a bad outer space film. I'd rather sit and watch that than be bored and annoyed by 2001, no matter how famous or visionary it is. I think GQ a charming parody film that I've enjoyed every time I've seen it. However, since Wall-E is my selection, I'll request Tim as senior judge to please re-rank it as he sees fit.

4. Solaris - Uh oh. I was fully prepared to defend my ranking of this, but there's a problem. Since I don't want to know who picked what, I didn't read the original posters comments. Because of this I watched and rated the Clooney version. This probably needs to be re-ranked, but I disliked the Clooney version so much I'm not sure I'm willing to sit though another 2 hours of that story again. Opinions?

 

[KarmaPolice]

The original Solaris is about 1 hour longer and "artier"

 

[KarmaPolice]

I don't think people have a problem with less serious fare at the top. For my money, starship troopers >>> spaceballs >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> galaxy quest. I realize I love troopers more than most though.

 

[jwb]

OK, a couple of notes on the responses:

1. The Day the Earth Stood Still - I used my criteria to get tiers of films, and then ranked within the tier. Once the writeups were done I nudged a few films up or down a notch based on how I felt about them after writing the review. Rather than use a number system this time, I used a demerit system, notching films -1 for being a little off and -2 for being a lot off, etc., then inside the category paid more focus to the overall quality of the movie. TDtESS was a good, but not great film (-1), got high critical reviews but average box office (-1), and was the only film selected that got a -2 for outer space qualifications, for a total of -4, which puts it in the tier with The Last Starfighter and Starship Troopers. In that tier it was easily the best film and got the highest rating.

2. The Last Starfighter - I stand by the dated comment. Films made in the previous decade to TLS still look like quality, but they were all minature photography based. TLS has the misfortune of being leading edge on computer generated graphics, but before computer graphics were any good. Hence everything looks slow and fake.

3. Galaxy Quest and Wall-E - just as at the Academy Awards, comedy films always seem to get knocked when compared against more serious fare. I think both of these comedys are quality films, and that comedys are worth ranking highly on lists like these if they have that quality. I'll stand by the Galaxy Quest ranking - just because it's aim is to be a funny outer space film doesn't mean it's a bad outer space film. I'd rather sit and watch that than be bored and annoyed by 2001, no matter how famous or visionary it is. I think GQ a charming parody film that I've enjoyed every time I've seen it. However, since Wall-E is my selection, I'll request Tim as senior judge to please re-rank it as he sees fit.

4. Solaris - Uh oh. I was fully prepared to defend my ranking of this, but there's a problem. Since I don't want to know who picked what, I didn't read the original posters comments. Because of this I watched and rated the Clooney version. This probably needs to be re-ranked, but I disliked the Clooney version so much I'm not sure I'm willing to sit though another 2 hours of that story again. Opinions?

I don't know what to tell you - the Russian version is an hour longer, and slower/deeper.

Wiki IMDB

 

[Aerial Assault]

I don't think people have a problem with less serious fare at the top. For my money, starship troopers >>> spaceballs >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> galaxy quest. I realize I love troopers more than most though.

I'll say! I mean, I dig space flicks, so I liked it, but there were certainly some issues. Like the atrocious acting from some of the principals. Then there's the sliiiiiiiight deviation from the source material.

 

[Aerial Assault]

Val, I know every one of those flicks, and I thought your rankings were fair, well thought-out, and a great read. Nice job. (Should someone like me with no real dog in the hunt reslot Solaris for you since the drafter wanted the Russian version?)

 

[jwb]

I haven't seen Solaris, but the problem with calling it one of the greatest sci fi films ever is that this label could apply to any movie drafted. After all there are only 25 films.In any case, great job, Val. You were thoughtful, tried to be consistent, and backed up your rankings with detailed explanations. That's all I can ask for.

heh, yea, and one of them is Galaxy Quest Sorry Val - you are going to get repeated ribbings for that one. (I do understand the guilty pleasure thing, though.)

 

[KarmaPolice]

I don't think people have a problem with less serious fare at the top. For my money, starship troopers >>> spaceballs >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> galaxy quest. I realize I love troopers more than most though.

I'll say! I mean, I dig space flicks, so I liked it, but there were certainly some issues. Like the atrocious acting from some of the principals. Then there's the sliiiiiiiight deviation from the source material.

Never read the book, so that wasn't an issue. I just have a blast with it and take it as satire/black comedy. It is bad in a brilliant way. Plus it has naked dina meyer!

 

[Aerial Assault]

I haven't seen Solaris, but the problem with calling it one of the greatest sci fi films ever is that this label could apply to any movie drafted. After all there are only 25 films.In any case, great job, Val. You were thoughtful, tried to be consistent, and backed up your rankings with detailed explanations. That's all I can ask for.

heh, yea, and one of them is Galaxy Quest Sorry Val - you are going to get repeated ribbings for that one.

It's a very well-written, hilarious movie. I'm not getting the hate. Maybe you have to be a Trek fan?

 

[jwb]

I like Starship Troopers quite a bit as well.

 

[Nick Vermeil]

I like Starship Troopers quite a bit as well.

+1

 

[jwb]

I haven't seen Solaris, but the problem with calling it one of the greatest sci fi films ever is that this label could apply to any movie drafted. After all there are only 25 films.In any case, great job, Val. You were thoughtful, tried to be consistent, and backed up your rankings with detailed explanations. That's all I can ask for.

heh, yea, and one of them is Galaxy Quest Sorry Val - you are going to get repeated ribbings for that one.

It's a very well-written, hilarious movie. I'm not getting the hate. Maybe you have to be a Trek fan?

It's a lite, fun, fairly safe comedy. Not a bad way to spend an evening, for sure, but nothing really noteworthy, either. Just very forgettable, imho.

 

[Aerial Assault]

I don't think people have a problem with less serious fare at the top. For my money, starship troopers >>> spaceballs >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> galaxy quest. I realize I love troopers more than most though.

I'll say! I mean, I dig space flicks, so I liked it, but there were certainly some issues. Like the atrocious acting from some of the principals. Then there's the sliiiiiiiight deviation from the source material.

Never read the book, so that wasn't an issue. I just have a blast with it and take it as satire/black comedy. It is bad in a brilliant way. Plus it has naked dina meyer!

Oh, okay, that's your take. Gotcha. I don't think it was intended to be funny, though. And I am very surprised that YOU have not read Heinlein.

 

[Nick Vermeil]

I don't think people have a problem with less serious fare at the top. For my money, starship troopers >>> spaceballs >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> galaxy quest. I realize I love troopers more than most though.

I'll say! I mean, I dig space flicks, so I liked it, but there were certainly some issues. Like the atrocious acting from some of the principals. Then there's the sliiiiiiiight deviation from the source material.

Never read the book, so that wasn't an issue. I just have a blast with it and take it as satire/black comedy. It is bad in a brilliant way. Plus it has naked dina meyer!

Oh, okay, that's your take. Gotcha. I don't think it was intended to be funny, though. And I am very surprised that YOU have not read Heinlein.

The movie was definitely supposed to be funny. Would you like to know more?

 

[jwb]

I don't think people have a problem with less serious fare at the top. For my money, starship troopers >>> spaceballs >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>> galaxy quest. I realize I love troopers more than most though.

I'll say! I mean, I dig space flicks, so I liked it, but there were certainly some issues. Like the atrocious acting from some of the principals. Then there's the sliiiiiiiight deviation from the source material.

Never read the book, so that wasn't an issue. I just have a blast with it and take it as satire/black comedy. It is bad in a brilliant way. Plus it has naked dina meyer!

Oh, okay, that's your take. Gotcha. I don't think it was intended to be funny, though. And I am very surprised that YOU have not read Heinlein.

Oh, I definitely think it was meant to be funny in a satirical way. The "the infantry made me the man I am today" (focus on limb stumps) / the whole "over the top" news reports that somewhat reflect (and magnify) the forced patriotism of the 40's and 50's, etc.

 

[Val Rannous]

Val, I know every one of those flicks, and I thought your rankings were fair, well thought-out, and a great read. Nice job. (Should someone like me with no real dog in the hunt reslot Solaris for you since the drafter wanted the Russian version?)

Honestly, If there's someone here who I'd trust, it's you. Please, if you wanna take the bullet, I'll take it. If Tim doesn't want to step in on the Wall-E rank, take your best shot at that as well.

Tim, Mrs. R will probably take the dance scenes. I'll hit her up for it when I get home and see what she has to say for herself.

 

[Time Kibitzer]

I enjoy my fair share of arthouse flicks, but the original Russian Solaris film is one of the worst films I've ever seen, after seeing it I was shocked at all the critical praise and accolades it has received. All of Val's issues with the American version are twofold true for the Russian version. The set may have been relatively interesting, but the movie was boring to the nth degree, so many long drawn out scenes just watching the actors do nothing. The main character was incredibly unbelievable, he's the biggest ####### of a psychologist I've ever seen, and seriously, what kind of scientist who takes himself seriously wears a mesh shirt with a leather jacket and skin tight pants? He looked like some gay bear biker, not a psychologist/scientist responsible for some billion dollar project; though the terrible actor certainly didn't help give credence to the character either. And there was no reason to give a #### about any of these characters; for the last hour and a half I was just hoping the space station would blow up and kill them all so the film could end.

If I could give any advice to Val, it'd be to save himself from 3 hours of boredom and just leave Solaris with the one point, I promise it's justified.

 

[joffer]

I like Starship Troopers quite a bit as well.

+1

great movie

 

[Aerial Assault]

Val, I know every one of those flicks, and I thought your rankings were fair, well thought-out, and a great read. Nice job. (Should someone like me with no real dog in the hunt reslot Solaris for you since the drafter wanted the Russian version?)

Honestly, If there's someone here who I'd trust, it's you. Please, if you wanna take the bullet, I'll take it. If Tim doesn't want to step in on the Wall-E rank, take your best shot at that as well.

Thanks, man. First, there's no cause to re-rank Wall-E. It's a fun film that can definitely be defended for a high score in this group of flicks, in what was not as deep a category as I think people thought it was. I would have had Serenity much higher and Close Encounters right behind the top three (which I believe were three of the top seven picks in the entire draft), then Apollo 13, but those are minor quibbles and you defended your arguments very well.

I will re-slot Solaris, later tonight. TIM > is this okay? I need to warm up for getting the superhero rankings out anyway.

 

[jwb]

I enjoy my fair share of arthouse flicks, but the original Russian Solaris film is one of the worst films I've ever seen, after seeing it I was shocked at all the critical praise and accolades it has received. All of Val's issues with the American version are twofold true for the Russian version. The set may have been relatively interesting, but the movie was boring to the nth degree, so many long drawn out scenes just watching the actors do nothing. The main character was incredibly unbelievable, he's the biggest ####### of a psychologist I've ever seen, and seriously, what kind of scientist who takes himself seriously wears a mesh shirt with a leather jacket and skin tight pants? He looked like some gay bear biker, not a psychologist/scientist responsible for some billion dollar project; though the terrible actor certainly didn't help give credence to the character either. And there was no reason to give a #### about any of these characters; for the last hour and a half I was just hoping the space station would blow up and kill them all so the film could end.

If I could give any advice to Val, it'd be to save himself from 3 hours of boredom and just leave Solaris with the one point, I promise it's justified.

It was the 70's?

Ahhh, go back to watching Transformers, you bunch of simpletons!

(seriously, if there is a "film-snob" list, Solaris is definitely on it.)