Can we discuss pet peeves here? (5 Viewers)

[belljr]

"I didn't touch it!!!"

 

[parasaurolophus]

I'll be looking for something in the house and ask my wife, "Do you know where the _____ is?  It was on this table yesterday."  Then she'll get up in a huff, open like 6 drawers, 5 cabinets, the garage, and then find it in a closet.  And as she hands it to me, she'll say, "You could try looking before you ask."  But why would I just blindly start searching the entire house when I know that she has put it somewhere?  I didn't put it away.  Obviously, because I'm the man.  And the fact that she DID put it away and she still can't find it shows that even with a working knowledge of it's possible whereabouts, it took her a while to locate it.

I hate when people try and help with "where was the last place you had it?" 

The following has literally never happened with somebody that has half a brain. 

"Honey do you know where my wallet is?"

"Where was the last place you had it?"

"Thanks, found it in the last place I had it and didnt think to look there yet until you brought it up" 

 

[mr. furley]

I'll be looking for something in the house and ask my wife, "Do you know where the _____ is?  It was on this table yesterday."  Then she'll get up in a huff, open like 6 drawers, 5 cabinets, the garage, and then find it in a closet.  And as she hands it to me, she'll say, "You could try looking before you ask."  But why would I just blindly start searching the entire house when I know that she has put it somewhere?  I didn't put it away.  Obviously, because I'm the man.  And the fact that she DID put it away and she still can't find it shows that even with a working knowledge of it's possible whereabouts, it took her a while to locate it.

THIS

i'm a "put it back where you found it" guy. so for things like my car keys, phone, etc. they're always in the same place. every day. if my wife takes my car for the day, and the keys aren't where i always leave them, i'll ask where she left them knowing full well she's going to say "why do i have to look?? they're not my keys."

i'll stupidly look in obvious places like her purse. the table where her purse is most often found. the bathroom. bedroom. kitchen. her car. outside in the yard. Walgreen's.

only for her to turn them up in one of the bathroom cabinet drawers.. which was totally obvious if i just looked instead of asking her, like the complete ####### ####### that i am.

 

[Bull Dozier]

I'll be looking for something in the house and ask my wife, "Do you know where the _____ is?  It was on this table yesterday."  Then she'll get up in a huff, open like 6 drawers, 5 cabinets, the garage, and then find it in a closet.  And as she hands it to me, she'll say, "You could try looking before you ask."  But why would I just blindly start searching the entire house when I know that she has put it somewhere?  I didn't put it away.  Obviously, because I'm the man.  And the fact that she DID put it away and she still can't find it shows that even with a working knowledge of it's possible whereabouts, it took her a while to locate it.

Totally this.  We have a slightly cluttered house.  Neither my wife or I are neat freaks.  But, everyone once in a while she'll get in a mood and straighten up the house when everyone is gone.  I'll have had something in the same place for weeks (say, a book on a table in the living room).  I'll want to read it and ask her where she put it.  She'll be all defensive like why would she know where it is, and be offended when I suggest she moved it.  Look, you moved everything that wasn't nailed down in this house, so if you're going to do that, remember where you put it.  Meanwhile, her gym back and all the shoes she regularly wears are all piled right at the door.  Couldn't bring yourself to straighten up that area could you?  Of course not, because its convenient for her to keep all her stuff by the door.  Guess what, it was convenient to have my book on the table where I read it!

 

[mr. furley]

Totally this.  We have a slightly cluttered house.  Neither my wife or I are neat freaks.  But, everyone once in a while she'll get in a mood and straighten up the house when everyone is gone.  I'll have had something in the same place for weeks (say, a book on a table in the living room).  I'll want to read it and ask her where she put it.  She'll be all defensive like why would she know where it is, and be offended when I suggest she moved it.  Look, you moved everything that wasn't nailed down in this house, so if you're going to do that, remember where you put it.  Meanwhile, her gym back and all the shoes she regularly wears are all piled right at the door.  Couldn't bring yourself to straighten up that area could you?  Of course not, because its convenient for her to keep all her stuff by the door.  Guess what, it was convenient to have my book on the table where I read it!

on the extremely rare occasions when my wife picks up, she picks up everyone else's stuff but her own.

and if it's mine, pretty good chance it's going in the trash.  

"honey, i noticed you picked up. i had a pair of shoes by the back door that i wear for cutting lawn, but the shoes are gone.  i just took them off so that i didn't track grass through the house on my way to the bathroom... any idea where you put them in the last 5 - 7 minutes???"

"i threw them out! they were getting in the way and you haven't worn them in forever!!"

 

 

[TheIronSheik]

on the extremely rare occasions when my wife picks up, she picks up everyone else's stuff but her own.

and if it's mine, pretty good chance it's going in the trash.  

"honey, i noticed you picked up. i had a pair of shoes by the back door that i wear for cutting lawn, but the shoes are gone.  i just took them off so that i didn't track grass through the house on my way to the bathroom... any idea where you put them in the last 5 - 7 minutes???"

"i threw them out! they were getting in the way and you haven't worn them in forever!!"

 

I mentioned this in here before, but after reading you post, I'm starting to think our wives might be related.  I love when my wife walks into a room and her stuff is scattered all over the place.  And I'll have one thing out of place, like a shirt I took off to shed a layer, laying on the couch.  She'll see that shirt and be like, "This place is a pig sty.  Can we clean this area up so it doesn't look like a hoarder lives here?  I mean, a shirt laying on the couch?  C'mon."  

 

[UOFI_316]

I mentioned this in here before, but after reading you post, I'm starting to think our wives might be related.  I love when my wife walks into a room and her stuff is scattered all over the place.  And I'll have one thing out of place, like a shirt I took off to shed a layer, laying on the couch.  She'll see that shirt and be like, "This place is a pig sty.  Can we clean this area up so it doesn't look like a hoarder lives here?  I mean, a shirt laying on the couch?  C'mon."  

Pretty sure at this point all our wives are related.  When it is time to eat I typically take whatever is on the kitchen table (homework, coloring pages, newspaper, mail, whatever my wife was doing and left there.....) and put it on a side counter so it is out of the way.  After dinner the girls put their things away or at least start using them again (leaving just my wife's stuff on the counter).  After the girls are in bed my wife will walk into the kitchen and start complaining that nothing is ever put away, and how hard she tries to keep it clean....  Her solution is to push everything into one big pile instead of smaller logically ordered ones.  Within a day she will be complaining that she can't find something.   I do a quick look through the wife made massive pile and find it for her.

Pretty sure this was mentioned somewhere way up thread, but not cleaning a pizza cutter correctly so there is dried cheese on it.  Monday we made quesadillas for the girls for dinner.  I went to get the pizza cutter to cut them up and sure enough when I moved the cutter there was some dried on cheese that was hiding under the handle (wife had made a pizza over the weekend). So I put it in the sink with the intention of soaking it and getting the crap off.  Yesterday I was working from home and my wife made a pizza for lunch.  I heard her cusing and digging through every drawer looking for the pizza cutter.  She finally asked me where it went and I told her "in the sink, it was dirty cause someone didn't get all the cheese off it last time it was used"

And a related peeve, people (my wife) who can't cut a pizza in one slice and end up making like 30 trips going back and forth, only making a slightly different path each time (this only leads to more cheese stuck on the cutter).

 

[ChiefD]

Pretty sure at this point all our wives are related. 

Yep.

My favorite is the wife taking off her boots or shoes and setting them just outside the closet door. Where they pile up for a week or more. 

Right outside the closet door. Like - one more step in the process and the shoes would be actually IN the closet.  It's baffling, really.

 

[EYLive]

I can't buy nice things for my wife anymore. She lost her engagement ring within 4 months and her fancy smart watch within 2 months of me gifting them to her. F that S.

 

[CurlyNight]

I have no idea how you get your shoes on the wrong feet.  But then, I'm the one who tried to put both legs into one side of my jeans, so what do i know?  At least you have a reason.

Done that too. Looking forward to the day I put my underwear on my head instead of a hat.

 

[mr. furley]

I mentioned this in here before, but after reading you post, I'm starting to think our wives might be related.  I love when my wife walks into a room and her stuff is scattered all over the place.  And I'll have one thing out of place, like a shirt I took off to shed a layer, laying on the couch.  She'll see that shirt and be like, "This place is a pig sty.  Can we clean this area up so it doesn't look like a hoarder lives here?  I mean, a shirt laying on the couch?  C'mon."  

mine will just blister the kids for leaving a paper plate on the table.  then walk right past the empty bottles, plates, candy bar wrappers, socks, pants, shoes, etc. that she has strewn about the house.

it's..... hard to figure.

 

[belljr]

um they are all related - they have vaginas

 

[mr. furley]

And a related peeve, people (my wife) who can't cut a pizza in one slice and end up making like 30 trips going back and forth, only making a slightly different path each time (this only leads to more cheese stuck on the cutter).

 sorry, i had to get up and walk away from this one.  this is so good. so, so good. 

mine isn't allowed to cut the pizza anymore because it's like forcing a complex project on her desk, with an extremely short timeline.  too much pressure to cut the pizza. it just goes all ker####itty ( @bakes )

 

[arrow1]

My wife wears her shoes in the house which drives me nuts.  She knows it too....

 

[DallasDMac]

mine will just blister the kids for leaving a paper plate on the table.  then walk right past the empty bottles, plates, candy bar wrappers, socks, pants, shoes, etc. that she has strewn about the house.

it's..... hard to figure.

I think the word you were looking for was "tolerate." At least it would be the appropriate word for me.

 

[grateful zed]

Velcro straps....

even better.

 

[parasaurolophus]

When my nephews come over they leave their shoes right in the doorway, drop their coats right next to them, and leave the door open 80% of the time. 

Not too long ago, just my sister came over. Shoes off right in the doorway. About 15 minutes later the door pops open because she didnt shut it all the way. 

Not sure where my nephews get it from. 

 

[El Floppo]

My wife and I are pretty similar in terms of cleanliness. We both keep things fairly tidy but aren't neat freaks.

But yeah- every now and then she'll decide to power clean and yell at me for "always" leaving my shoes at the console near our front door. The same place she leaves them, except in her power cleaning, she literally just moved them before yelling at me.

Conversely, I'm constantly asking where something is (my kids do it too)...which is usually right in front of my face, in spite of my having already looked for it. Drives her batty.

 

[nirad3]

When my nephews come over they leave their shoes right in the doorway, drop their coats right next to them, and leave the door open 80% of the time. 

Not too long ago, just my sister came over. Shoes off right in the doorway. About 15 minutes later the door pops open because she didnt shut it all the way. 

Not sure where my nephews get it from. 

FFS.  Yes.  My kids are 9 and 7 and have some friends down the street that are similarly-aged and they are in and out of our house a few afternoon/evenings a week and all day on Saturday/Sunday.  I find myself closing our screen door (it's full-metal, not actually screen) 4-5 times a day.  We have an old dog that will wander out and go who-knows-how-far if given the opportunity.

I don't wanna be the "jerk dad" but these kids are driving me crazy.

 

[Mrs. Rannous]

Velcro straps....

even better.

Even more better.

 

[Leroy Hoard]

Even more better.

Sold out.

 

[belljr]

i know its been mentioned before but i'll just post it

me: "is little belljr getting up normal time tomorrow? "

wife: "well, i have to go to work early, friday is a half day, (a bunch a stuff I didn't pay attention too)"

me: "so is little belljr getting up normal time tomorrow or not?"

wife:  I guess!@#!@

me: thank you

 

[mr. furley]

some of you may have heard the term "punchline rappers". others maybe not.  it's essentially a guy whose verses are setups for punchlines. they aren't storytellers, or guys who just string together words that rhyme without context. every bar is closed with a punchline.

C Rayz Walz would be a punchline rapper.

i like the guy,  and his punchlines are good. they're funny or clever.  but he's one of the few that can pull together good punchline verses.

it may be a surprise to learn that #!%!%!% is a punchline conversationalist. CAN YOU IMAGINE!?!?!?  except he's bad at it. way too heavy handed. fishing for words in the midst of a conversation to link to a punchline. or one-liner from a tv show. or a scene from a show that might possibly tangentially relate.

instead of saying "can you pop over", i get  "(3 minutes of jibberish as he fishes for an appropriate situational reference) (Sopranos reference)    (Simpsons reference)   words words words (Airwolf reference)     !$!$!%!%!!##!!"

5 minutes later we finally arrive at the actual question.  

10 seconds later i've answered the question

"(2 minutes of jibberish as he fishes for an appropriate situational reference) (Cheers reference)    words words words (Family Ties reference)   words words words (He-man reference)     !$!$!%!%!!##!!"

i've just lost 10 minutes of my day listening to 80s tv references and i'm no better off.

 

[offdee]

FFS.  Yes.  My kids are 9 and 7 and have some friends down the street that are similarly-aged and they are in and out of our house a few afternoon/evenings a week and all day on Saturday/Sunday.  I find myself closing our screen door (it's full-metal, not actually screen) 4-5 times a day.  We have an old dog that will wander out and go who-knows-how-far if given the opportunity.

I don't wanna be the "jerk dad" but these kids are driving me crazy.

install self closing hinges

 

[El Floppo]

Imagine a food truck parked next to a sidewalk.

Line forms onto the sidewalk..perpendicular to curb, immediately creating a wall of people blocking the sidewalk. (This applies anywhere that a line forms into a narrow space).

Line up parallel to the curb and the world will keep moving. Seems so stupidly obvious, but people are mind-blowed-up when I line up at a right angle to their idiotic line. 

 

[parasaurolophus]

Anti vaxxers

Somebody i know posted some antivaxxer rant and i have a personal policy of putting anybody that spreads such stupid propaganda on ignore. 

Sucks since the only other thing the guy posts are humble brag posts about his super hot wife doing gymnastics and yoga all over the world. With lots of photos. 

Maybe my pet peeve should be personal moral codes. 

 

[wlwiles]

Anti vaxxers

Somebody i know posted some antivaxxer rant and i have a personal policy of putting anybody that spreads such stupid propaganda on ignore. 

Sucks since the only other thing the guy posts are humble brag posts about his super hot wife doing gymnastics and yoga all over the world. With lots of photos. 

Maybe my pet peeve should be personal moral codes. 

Unblock him, but filter out keywords related to "vaccine", "vax", etc. 

Enjoy the photos

 

[El Floppo]

I commute by bike here in NYC, mostly in bike lanes where possible. the bike lanes here are between the sidewalk and parked cars, so pedestrians feel like there's a buffer area for them to walk through during red-lights... which is the bike lane. we've only had these en masse for a few years, so people are still figuring things out on all ends (bikers, pedestrians, cars, trucks, buses, etc). for the most part, people make mistakes and that's fine- I just have to ride as I drive: always aware, and always defensively.

but almost daily, there's a different group of pedestrians- usually tourists or bridge and tunnel people not used to day-to-day city life- who stand in or step out into the bike lane at rush-hour and then laugh when the commuting/working cyclists have to swerve dangerously to avoid crashing into them, amidst a chorus of ringing bells and shouts. not "oops" or "oh, sorry"... laughter. not sure why it bugs me so much, but it does. I guess I assume these are the same people who would lose their minds if somebody jumped out in front of their car during rush hour, causing them to swerve dangerously into other lanes to avoid crashing. 

 

[El Floppo]

Unblock him, but filter out keywords related to "vaccine", "vax", etc. 

Enjoy the photos

ignore his words and just look at the pictures. this is how I get through most of my work and personal life.

 

[TheIronSheik]

I commute by bike here in NYC, mostly in bike lanes where possible. the bike lanes here are between the sidewalk and parked cars, so pedestrians feel like there's a buffer area for them to walk through during red-lights... which is the bike lane. we've only had these en masse for a few years, so people are still figuring things out on all ends (bikers, pedestrians, cars, trucks, buses, etc). for the most part, people make mistakes and that's fine- I just have to ride as I drive: always aware, and always defensively.

but almost daily, there's a different group of pedestrians- usually tourists or bridge and tunnel people not used to day-to-day city life- who stand in or step out into the bike lane at rush-hour and then laugh when the commuting/working cyclists have to swerve dangerously to avoid crashing into them, amidst a chorus of ringing bells and shouts. not "oops" or "oh, sorry"... laughter. not sure why it bugs me so much, but it does. I guess I assume these are the same people who would lose their minds if somebody jumped out in front of their car during rush hour, causing them to swerve dangerously into other lanes to avoid crashing. 

Are you sure you like the city?

 

[El Floppo]

Are you sure you like the city?

love it. just hate people.

 

[General Malaise]

My wife wears her shoes in the house which drives me nuts.  She knows it too....

Does she have plantar fasciitis?  Doctors advise wearing shoes at all times (even inside) for those with that dreadful condition.

 

[El Floppo]

Does she have plantar fasciitis?  Doctors advise wearing shoes at all times (even inside) for those with that dreadful condition.

my wife has pf. she wears slippers in the house. 

 

[General Malaise]

My wife and I are pretty similar in terms of cleanliness. We both keep things fairly tidy but aren't neat freaks.

But yeah- every now and then she'll decide to power clean and yell at me for "always" leaving my shoes at the console near our front door. The same place she leaves them, except in her power cleaning, she literally just moved them before yelling at me.

Conversely, I'm constantly asking where something is (my kids do it too)...which is usually right in front of my face, in spite of my having already looked for it. Drives her batty.

I do this too and it drives my wife nuts.  Generally, though, if PEOPLE* don't move the stuff I'm accustomed to finding the SAME PLACE I have come to expect this stuff to be, I wouldn't be in this pickle.  

*97.6% PEOPLE = Wife.  Leave my stuff alone where it is!

 

[El Floppo]

My wife and I are pretty similar in terms of cleanliness. We both keep things fairly tidy but aren't neat freaks.

But yeah- every now and then she'll decide to power clean and yell at me for "always" leaving my shoes at the console near our front door. The same place she leaves them, except in her power cleaning, she literally just moved them before yelling at me.

Conversely, I'm constantly asking where something is (my kids do it too)...which is usually right in front of my face, in spite of my having already looked for it. Drives her batty.

I do this too and it drives my wife nuts.  Generally, though, if PEOPLE* don't move the stuff I'm accustomed to finding the SAME PLACE I have come to expect this stuff to be, I wouldn't be in this pickle.  

*97.6% PEOPLE = Wife.  Leave my stuff alone where it is!

yeah... with me, I can't blame the wife or anybody else for it. these are things right in front of me most of the time- I'm just looking past them to trickier spots.

at the same time, it's a pain in the ### to have to look for crap when what should be a simple question/request is met with such hostility. 

 

[TheIronSheik]

So, again, this is just my wife.  But I'll be walking in the house and bang my toe or step on something and I'll make that sound where you suck air in through your teeth.  Maybe I'll take a knee for a second to let the pain subside.  Meanwhile, from the other room I'll hear her yell, "Jesus Christ.  What did you do now?", in an angry voice.

Like, why is she mad?    I'm laying on the ground in pain AND I'm getting yelled at. 

 

[Drunken knight]

I commute by bike here in NYC, mostly in bike lanes where possible. the bike lanes here are between the sidewalk and parked cars, so pedestrians feel like there's a buffer area for them to walk through during red-lights... which is the bike lane. we've only had these en masse for a few years, so people are still figuring things out on all ends (bikers, pedestrians, cars, trucks, buses, etc). for the most part, people make mistakes and that's fine- I just have to ride as I drive: always aware, and always defensively.

but almost daily, there's a different group of pedestrians- usually tourists or bridge and tunnel people not used to day-to-day city life- who stand in or step out into the bike lane at rush-hour and then laugh when the commuting/working cyclists have to swerve dangerously to avoid crashing into them, amidst a chorus of ringing bells and shouts. not "oops" or "oh, sorry"... laughter. not sure why it bugs me so much, but it does. I guess I assume these are the same people who would lose their minds if somebody jumped out in front of their car during rush hour, causing them to swerve dangerously into other lanes to avoid crashing. 

Hey! Share the road!  

 

[Leroy Hoard]

I commute by bike here in NYC, mostly in bike lanes where possible. the bike lanes here are between the sidewalk and parked cars, so pedestrians feel like there's a buffer area for them to walk through during red-lights... which is the bike lane. we've only had these en masse for a few years, so people are still figuring things out on all ends (bikers, pedestrians, cars, trucks, buses, etc). for the most part, people make mistakes and that's fine- I just have to ride as I drive: always aware, and always defensively.

but almost daily, there's a different group of pedestrians- usually tourists or bridge and tunnel people not used to day-to-day city life- who stand in or step out into the bike lane at rush-hour and then laugh when the commuting/working cyclists have to swerve dangerously to avoid crashing into them, amidst a chorus of ringing bells and shouts. not "oops" or "oh, sorry"... laughter. not sure why it bugs me so much, but it does. I guess I assume these are the same people who would lose their minds if somebody jumped out in front of their car during rush hour, causing them to swerve dangerously into other lanes to avoid crashing. 

Those people need to be run into with bikes. Not only will they take the worst of it, but they had no right of way if it goes to court.

 

[mr. furley]

So, again, this is just my wife.  But I'll be walking in the house and bang my toe or step on something and I'll make that sound where you suck air in through your teeth.  Maybe I'll take a knee for a second to let the pain subside.  Meanwhile, from the other room I'll hear her yell, "Jesus Christ.  What did you do now?", in an angry voice.

Like, why is she mad?    I'm laying on the ground in pain AND I'm getting yelled at. 

few weeks back my kid was standing in the bathroom, getting her hair done by my wife. they had the door shut because it can get cold in the bathroom with the door open.  but the shower had just been run, the heat was pumping and the hair dryer was blowing 300 degree heat on the back of the kid's head.  "we" (later)  deduced that the heat and standing stock still got to her, she started feeling faint, locked her knees thinking she could steady herself and *boom* down she went.

i only know this because i was rounding the corner in to the bedroom and heard the thud followed by "(furley's daughter) WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?? GET UP! THAT WAS DRAMATIC, DON'T YOU THINK??!??!"

me:  what is going on???

wife:  your daughter is being ridiculous! she doesn't want to get her hair done so she sat down on the ground!

daughter: *warblegarbleargbe...  huh?  abbledabblerab.... i feel siiiick

me: are you OK?

daughter: huh?

me: are you ok? i heard a thud and now you feel sick. are you ok?

daughter:  

me: did you fall down?

wife: she's just being dramatic! 

daughter:  i'm going to... ughhh... why am i sitting?  i feel.... i feel dizzy. what are you doing? why are you standing there? uggh.... i'm going to puke. 

let her get her wits a bit, got her over to sit on the bed. got her a water and a cool compress. 

daughter: oh, hey! why am i sitting here? what happened?

me: you passed out while mom was doing your hair

wife: SHE DID NOT!

me: why are you yelling at me? she's got no idea what's going on. she fainted and hit the deck. why are you mad?

wife: this is so dumb. she did not fall. she leaned up against the wall and then sat down with her eyes closed.

me: what was that thud?

wife: well, she kinda of leaned really fast and hit the wall and then she sat down and knocked over the garbage can.

me: sooo... she passed out and you're yelling at her for it?

wife: 

 

[Bull Dozier]

few weeks back my kid was standing in the bathroom, getting her hair done by my wife. they had the door shut because it can get cold in the bathroom with the door open.  but the shower had just been run, the heat was pumping and the hair dryer was blowing 300 degree heat on the back of the kid's head.  "we" (later)  deduced that the heat and standing stock still got to her, she started feeling faint, locked her knees thinking she could steady herself and *boom* down she went.

i only know this because i was rounding the corner in to the bedroom and heard the thud followed by "(furley's daughter) WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?? GET UP! THAT WAS DRAMATIC, DON'T YOU THINK??!??!"

me:  what is going on???

wife:  your daughter is being ridiculous! she doesn't want to get her hair done so she sat down on the ground!

daughter: *warblegarbleargbe...  huh?  abbledabblerab.... i feel siiiick

me: are you OK?

daughter: huh?

me: are you ok? i heard a thud and now you feel sick. are you ok?

daughter:  

me: did you fall down?

wife: she's just being dramatic! 

daughter:  i'm going to... ughhh... why am i sitting?  i feel.... i feel dizzy. what are you doing? why are you standing there? uggh.... i'm going to puke. 

let her get her wits a bit, got her over to sit on the bed. got her a water and a cool compress. 

daughter: oh, hey! why am i sitting here? what happened?

me: you passed out while mom was doing your hair

wife: SHE DID NOT!

me: why are you yelling at me? she's got no idea what's going on. she fainted and hit the deck. why are you mad?

wife: this is so dumb. she did not fall. she leaned up against the wall and then sat down with her eyes closed.

me: what was that thud?

wife: well, she kinda of leaned really fast and hit the wall and then she sat down and knocked over the garbage can.

me: sooo... she passed out and you're yelling at her for it?

wife: 

Your wife is crazy but I love her for the stories she provides.

 

[El Floppo]

Could you imagine COULD YOU IMAGINE guy being married to furley wife? I can.

 

[mr. furley]

Could you imagine COULD YOU IMAGINE guy being married to furley wife? I can.

could you imagine being married to furley?!?

 

[El Floppo]

could you imagine being married to furley?!?

yes.  ....

 

[mr. furley]

Your wife is crazy but I love her for the stories she provides.

my link

 

[Zegras11]

my link

Can we get a live video for the next story, pleaseeeeeeeee?

 

[bryhamm]

me: you passed out while mom was doing your hair

wife: SHE DID NOT!

me: why are you yelling at me? she's got no idea what's going on. she fainted and hit the deck. why are you mad?

wife: this is so dumb. she did not fall. she leaned up against the wall and then sat down with her eyes closed.

lol.  yeah, cause most people decide to shut their eyes and sit down WITHOUT passing out.

 

[mr. furley]

lol.  yeah, cause most people decide to shut their eyes and sit down WITHOUT passing out.

it's because she's a defiant brat    she probably practices this sort of thing!  /s

she had no ####ing idea what was going on for a solid 3 minutes. like.. babbling sort of half sentences, pale, looking around totally mystified. she only remembers feeling sick to her stomach and then me talking to her while she was sitting on the bed.

 

[El Floppo]

it's because she's a defiant brat    she probably practices this sort of thing!  /s

she had no ####ing idea what was going on for a solid 3 minutes. like.. babbling sort of half sentences, pale, looking around totally mystified. she only remembers feeling sick to her stomach and then me talking to her while she was sitting on the bed.

she's on the dope, imo.

 

[Binky The Doormat]

I commute by bike here in NYC, mostly in bike lanes where possible. the bike lanes here are between the sidewalk and parked cars, so pedestrians feel like there's a buffer area for them to walk through during red-lights... which is the bike lane. we've only had these en masse for a few years, so people are still figuring things out on all ends (bikers, pedestrians, cars, trucks, buses, etc). for the most part, people make mistakes and that's fine- I just have to ride as I drive: always aware, and always defensively.

but almost daily, there's a different group of pedestrians- usually tourists or bridge and tunnel people not used to day-to-day city life- who stand in or step out into the bike lane at rush-hour and then laugh when the commuting/working cyclists have to swerve dangerously to avoid crashing into them, amidst a chorus of ringing bells and shouts. not "oops" or "oh, sorry"... laughter. not sure why it bugs me so much, but it does. I guess I assume these are the same people who would lose their minds if somebody jumped out in front of their car during rush hour, causing them to swerve dangerously into other lanes to avoid crashing. 

sounds dangerous, especially with the flowing scarves - we don't want an Isadora Floppo.  

 

[parasaurolophus]

People that refuse to do things differently than they have always done them for no other reason than they have always done it that way.