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My wife is really smart (1 Viewer)

Is this the thread where we grunt proudly because we're under some misguided illusion that we're the superior gender?

Women should be respected and admired. PM me for some kindness and compassion, ladies. :heart:

 
My wife is pretty sharp for the most part, but her downfall is direction.

Me: Hello?

Wife: I don't know where this place is.

Me: what street are you on?

Wife: I don't know, where do you find that? Oh right, on the poles.

Me: okay, you are on Main Street. Which way are you going?

Wife: Straight.

Me: ??

Wife: There's a CVS, and a gas station.

She then goes on and on describing everything that she sees around her, like that would help.

Me: So what does your gps say?

Wife: I don't know, it's on my phone and you aren't supposed to text and drive.

 
Treynwreck3 said:
My wife is pretty sharp for the most part, but her downfall is direction.

Me: Hello?

Wife: I don't know where this place is.

Me: what street are you on?

Wife: I don't know, where do you find that? Oh right, on the poles.

Me: okay, you are on Main Street. Which way are you going?

Wife: Straight.

Me: ??

Wife: There's a CVS, and a gas station.

She then goes on and on describing everything that she sees around her, like that would help.

Me: So what does your gps say?

Wife: I don't know, it's on my phone and you aren't supposed to text and drive.
Click to expand...
This one isn't a smarts issue. Some people just don't have direction sense. I have a (male) friend who can't move away from his home town because he's lost the moment he leaves the small area he knows. My mom totally lacked direction sense, and she was a world-class bridge player.

If she can't learn to use the GPS, then you have a problem.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Mrs. Rannous said:
This one isn't a smarts issue. Some people just don't have direction sense. I have a (male) friend who can't move away from his home town because he's lost the moment he leaves the small area he knows. My mom totally lacked direction sense, and she was a world-class bridge player.

If she can't learn to use the GPS, then you have a problem.
Click to expand...
Hold on... this is a thing?

 
Treynwreck3 said:
My wife is pretty sharp for the most part, but her downfall is direction.

Me: Hello?

Wife: I don't know where this place is.

Me: what street are you on?

Wife: I don't know, where do you find that? Oh right, on the poles.

Me: okay, you are on Main Street. Which way are you going?

Wife: Straight.

Me: ??

Wife: There's a CVS, and a gas station.

She then goes on and on describing everything that she sees around her, like that would help.

Me: So what does your gps say?

Wife: I don't know, it's on my phone and you aren't supposed to text and drive.
Click to expand...
:lol:

 
Disco Stu said:
Mrs. Rannous said:
This one isn't a smarts issue. Some people just don't have direction sense. I have a (male) friend who can't move away from his home town because he's lost the moment he leaves the small area he knows. My mom totally lacked direction sense, and she was a world-class bridge player.

If she can't learn to use the GPS, then you have a problem.
Click to expand...
Hold on... this is a thing?
Click to expand...
That's the first thing I thought as well. :lol:

 
Oh, the whole street sign thing needs more love. She asked me one time how to tell which sign was for which street. I explained that the signs generally run parallel to the corresponding street. She said that makes no sense. How are you supposed to see them if they are to the side?

 
Michael Brown said:
Me: Hey do you know what an aircraft carrier is?

Wife: What do you mean?

Me: Do you know what an aircraft carrier is?

Wife: Why are you asking me that?

Me: Just a question. Just to see if you know what it is. Do you know what it is?

Wife: (stares at me for about 3-4 seconds)

Me: So do you know what it is?

Wife: (pause)...Like an airplane?

Me: No, an aircraft carrier

Wife: No. What is it?

Me: It's an aircraft......carrier

Wife: I don't know. Something that carries aircraft I guess. Why are you asking me this?!?

Me: Apparently a lot of women don't know what it is. Like how guys don't know what a loofah is.

Wife: Wait is it like those big things out in the middle of the ocean? Like the planes go on it or something?
Click to expand...
What's the ruling on this one where they didn't know it but they kind of figure it out on the spot?

 
Mrs. Rannous said:
Treynwreck3 said:
My wife is pretty sharp for the most part, but her downfall is direction.

Me: Hello?

Wife: I don't know where this place is.

Me: what street are you on?

Wife: I don't know, where do you find that? Oh right, on the poles.

Me: okay, you are on Main Street. Which way are you going?

Wife: Straight.

Me: ??

Wife: There's a CVS, and a gas station.

She then goes on and on describing everything that she sees around her, like that would help.

Me: So what does your gps say?

Wife: I don't know, it's on my phone and you aren't supposed to text and drive.
Click to expand...
This one isn't a smarts issue. Some people just don't have direction sense. I have a (male) friend who can't move away from his home town because he's lost the moment he leaves the small area he knows. My mom totally lacked direction sense, and she was a world-class bridge player.

If she can't learn to use the GPS, then you have a problem.
Click to expand...
Brain games actually covered this in one of their Men vs Women episodes. Women actually do lack a sense of direction when compared to men.

 
Officer Pete Malloy said:
psychobillies said:
So a thread gets started about how stupid our wives are, then it turns into an argument over which detergent we should wash our clothes with.

The wives are winning fellas. We should probably tighten up.
Click to expand...
:shrug: I just stated a fact. Then some other rubes thought they should correct me even though they have no idea what they're talking about.
Click to expand...
Washing clothes is woman's work. I couldn't tell you where the damn detergent is. Or how to work the machine for that matter. :FLEX:

 
My wife has serious issues with pronunciation of commonly used foreign-based words.

Some real-life examples I've caught her at:

La Petite = La Pet-It

Parmagiana = Parma-Gee-Na

Sean = Seen

There have been others I can't remember right now. Sometimes she'll say a word telling me some story and I'm :shuked: for a while before I realize she is just butchering a pronunciation.

 
Jayrod said:
My wife has serious issues with pronunciation of commonly used foreign-based words.

Some real-life examples I've caught her at:

La Petite = La Pet-It

Parmagiana = Parma-Gee-Na

Sean = Seen

There have been others I can't remember right now. Sometimes she'll say a word telling me some story and I'm :shuked: for a while before I realize she is just butchering a pronunciation.
Click to expand...
In all fairness, I think we all know men who butcher the pronunciation of foreign languages

 
msommer said:
Jayrod said:
My wife has serious issues with pronunciation of commonly used foreign-based words.

Some real-life examples I've caught her at:

La Petite = La Pet-It

Parmagiana = Parma-Gee-Na

Sean = Seen

There have been others I can't remember right now. Sometimes she'll say a word telling me some story and I'm :shuked: for a while before I realize she is just butchering a pronunciation.
Click to expand...
In all fairness, I think we all know men who butcher the pronunciation of foreign languages
Click to expand...
True...this isn't necessarily a female thing, more like something specific to my wife.

 
####### it

She guessed a plane? A helicopter? A jet? I told her what it was. She goes oh an aircraft CARRIER. I get it.

 
Jayrod said:
My wife has serious issues with pronunciation of commonly used foreign-based words.

Some real-life examples I've caught her at:

La Petite = La Pet-It

Parmagiana = Parma-Gee-Na

Sean = Seen

There have been others I can't remember right now. Sometimes she'll say a word telling me some story and I'm :shuked: for a while before I realize she is just butchering a pronunciation.
Click to expand...
:wall: :wall: :wall: :wall: :rant: :rant:

:hot: :hot: :hot: :hot: :hot:

 
"It's a big, flat military ship that carries aircraft. Why did you ask? Did someone tell you their wife didn't know what it was?"

 
I feel like we shouldn't be washing our kid's brand new clothes before they ever wear them

 
Last edited by a moderator:
Jackstraw said:
Officer Pete Malloy said:
psychobillies said:
So a thread gets started about how stupid our wives are, then it turns into an argument over which detergent we should wash our clothes with.The wives are winning fellas. We should probably tighten up.
Click to expand...
:shrug: I just stated a fact. Then some other rubes thought they should correct me even though they have no idea what they're talking about.
Click to expand...
Washing clothes is woman's work. I couldn't tell you where the damn detergent is. Or how to work the machine for that matter. :FLEX:
Click to expand...
Your wife is under-employed. I will laundry until I die if my wife can bring home the money she is now.

 
New question for your wife:

If you're in a race, and you pass the person in second place, what place are you in?

 
I asked my wife the aircraft carrier question. She looked at me like I was lacking a significant amount of brain cells. Her first words, Are you ****ing kidding me?

No, really, just answer the question.

It's a navy ship that carries jets all over the ocean that they can take off and land on and is the reason why our navy is the most powerful in the world. Now why the hell are you asking me.

Um, there are FBG's who are saying that their wives have no idea what these things are.

Did they marry crash test dummies? Who doesn't know what an aircraft carrier is? Forget simple history, didn't they ever watch JAG or NCIS?

Then we laughed. She still can't change the time on a clock for daylight savings if her life depended on it.

And it prompted me to check out some google images of Katherine Bell, my old flame. Man do I lust her.

 
Yankee23Fan said:
I asked my wife the aircraft carrier question. She looked at me like I was lacking a significant amount of brain cells. Her first words, Are you ****ing kidding me?

No, really, just answer the question.

It's a navy ship that carries jets all over the ocean that they can take off and land on and is the reason why our navy is the most powerful in the world. Now why the hell are you asking me.

Um, there are FBG's who are saying that their wives have no idea what these things are.

Did they marry crash test dummies? Who doesn't know what an aircraft carrier is? Forget simple history, didn't they ever watch JAG or NCIS?

Then we laughed. She still can't change the time on a clock for daylight savings if her life depended on it.

And it prompted me to check out some google images of Katherine Bell, my old flame. Man do I lust her.
Click to expand...
Your wife gets a +1 for knowing what an aircraft carrier is, but a -1 for somehow believing that JAG and NCIS are shows that people actually watch.

 
CBusAlex said:
Yankee23Fan said:
I asked my wife the aircraft carrier question. She looked at me like I was lacking a significant amount of brain cells. Her first words, Are you ****ing kidding me?

No, really, just answer the question.

It's a navy ship that carries jets all over the ocean that they can take off and land on and is the reason why our navy is the most powerful in the world. Now why the hell are you asking me.

Um, there are FBG's who are saying that their wives have no idea what these things are.

Did they marry crash test dummies? Who doesn't know what an aircraft carrier is? Forget simple history, didn't they ever watch JAG or NCIS?

Then we laughed. She still can't change the time on a clock for daylight savings if her life depended on it.

And it prompted me to check out some google images of Katherine Bell, my old flame. Man do I lust her.
Click to expand...
Your wife gets a +1 for knowing what an aircraft carrier is, but a -1 for somehow believing that JAG and NCIS are shows that people actually watch.
Click to expand...
:lol:

Those shows rock.

 
CBusAlex said:
Yankee23Fan said:
I asked my wife the aircraft carrier question. She looked at me like I was lacking a significant amount of brain cells. Her first words, Are you ****ing kidding me?

No, really, just answer the question.

It's a navy ship that carries jets all over the ocean that they can take off and land on and is the reason why our navy is the most powerful in the world. Now why the hell are you asking me.

Um, there are FBG's who are saying that their wives have no idea what these things are.

Did they marry crash test dummies? Who doesn't know what an aircraft carrier is? Forget simple history, didn't they ever watch JAG or NCIS?

Then we laughed. She still can't change the time on a clock for daylight savings if her life depended on it.

And it prompted me to check out some google images of Katherine Bell, my old flame. Man do I lust her.
Click to expand...
Your wife gets a +1 for knowing what an aircraft carrier is, but a -1 for somehow believing that JAG and NCIS are shows that people actually watch.
Click to expand...
JAG had 4 straight seasons with 14+ million viewers. About 5 times Mad Men's peak viewership. It spawned NCIS, which has been up around 20 million viewers for the past 5 years and spawned off 2 more shows that also get a ####ton of idiots watching every week.

They aren't good shows, but yes, people actually watch(ed) JAG and NCIS.

 
It's not a CONCERN per se. But I've read about it in the past and try to practice it with most new clothes, bedding, etc. I'm not a germaphobe or have any allergies outside of hay fever and cats, but I've had skin reactions from putting on a new, unwashed shirt. Kids pajamas and other clothing that contains flame ######ants are especially nasty. :hijack:

 
Annyong said:
johnnyrock62000 said:
Annyong said:
I feel like we shouldn't be washing our kid's brand new clothes before they ever wear them
Click to expand...
It seems I'm always asking my wife if she's washed the new clothes; chemicals, toxins and allergic reactions...ugh.
Click to expand...
Is this really a concern?
Click to expand...
I'm not concerned about this new clothes washing thing, but my wife most certainly is.

 
Last edited by a moderator:
pollardsvision said:
JAG had 4 straight seasons with 14+ million viewers. About 5 times Mad Men's peak viewership. It spawned NCIS, which has been up around 20 million viewers for the past 5 years and spawned off 2 more shows that also get a ####ton of idiots watching every week.

They aren't good shows, but yes, people actually watch(ed) JAG and NCIS.
Click to expand...
I had no idea JAG spawned NCIS. That's kind of sad. I hate both shows.  

 
Treynwreck3 said:
My wife is pretty sharp for the most part, but her downfall is direction.

Me: Hello?

Wife: I don't know where this place is.

Me: what street are you on?

Wife: I don't know, where do you find that? Oh right, on the poles.

Me: okay, you are on Main Street. Which way are you going?

Wife: Straight.

Me: ??

Wife: There's a CVS, and a gas station.

She then goes on and on describing everything that she sees around her, like that would help.

Me: So what does your gps say?

Wife: I don't know, it's on my phone and you aren't supposed to text and drive.
Click to expand...
JFC :lmao: :lmao: :lmao:

 
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